Twenty-Seven
“Are you coming already?” Jake asked from the hallway.
“Mommy!” Kristin exclaimed, running to her.
“Skiing? Now?” Jen picked up Kristin and balanced her on her hip.
“Uh…yeah,” Jake said. “Sort of like we’ve been doing every day for the last week.”
“I’m not sure… I’m a little slow today,” she moved from the bathroom into the hallway toward the bedroom. “You might have to go without us.”
“That’s ridiculous,” Jake said, following her. “Look, I don’t know what happened last night, and I don’t need to know. I’ve been there myself. But, the best way to get over it is to get out there and do something. Change into your suit, and let’s go skiing.”
Kristin’s corkscrew curls bounced as she watched Jake over Jen’s shoulder. She seemed especially fascinated by the base notes of Jake’s voice as he pressed Jen. Kristin had studied him all week, and like the others, she fed off his energy.
“Okay,” Jen said, entering the guest bedroom. “You’re right. I should do something to take my mind off…off…women.”
“Sports always worked for me,” he said from the doorway.
She sighed. “Just let me change clothes. Kristin and I will be out in a minute.”
She closed the door and retooled her brain, grateful to Jake for distracting her from hopeless romantic cogitations. She quickly changed into nylon shorts, a bikini top and a loose tank.
When she and Kristin joined the boys in the living room, they were talking sports, a topic to which they had devoted hundreds of hours and would no doubt devote hundreds more.
“What do you think of the 49ers’ draft pics?” Jake asked Tommy.
“I don’t follow football as close as baseball,” Tommy said.
“I take it you don’t follow the Packers?” Jake asked.
“Not really,” Tommy said, “but Aaron Rogers seems to be a good fit for them.”
Jen piped up. “You have to admit that we follow football more closely than most families since Duncan plays for them.”
“If you can call it playing when he’s second string and riding the pine every weekend,” Jake said.
“He’ll get his chance,” Roger said.
“I’m sorry I didn’t get to meet him this weekend,” Tommy said.
“You just missed him,” Kay said. “He was up here playing beer pong in the lake before he reported to camp.”
“The team doctor told him he was grossly overweight and had to lose 20 pounds,” Jake said, laughing.
“I’m not surprised after spending a week up here myself,” Jen said, patting her belly. “Twenty pounds on Duncan, though, is hardly ‘grossly overweight’ when he weighs 240. He’ll sweat off 20 pounds the first week of camp.”
“He can only hope,” Patrick chimed in. “Sorry to change the subject, but does anyone want to play Dungeons & Dragons?”
Everyone groaned, but quickly converted to coughs for fear of offending Patrick.
“In all fairness, I’m not even sure what D&D is,” Jen said. “Is it a card game?”
Jake slit his throat with a hand gesture, signaling to Jen to kill the subject. “You’re skiing, remember?”
Patrick cut him off, stepping around him. “It’s more like imaginative storytelling with an element of chance through a roll of the dice. You’d love it.”
“Well, maybe tonight during cocktails,” she said, even though Jake and Roger were vehemently shaking their heads behind Patrick’s back.
“Before you go off and running on the lake, Jake,” Kay said from the kitchen, “Would you please replace the solar light at the end of the sidewalk?”
“Awe, Mom,” he groaned. “Do I have to today?”
“Yes,” Kay said. “You’ve been promising all summer.”
“That was Duncan,” Jake said. “He gets out of everything because he’s an athlete.”
“How did it break?” Jen asked, accustomed to hearing Jake’s cries of unfair treatment when it came to Duncan. Deal with it already.
“The snowplow pushed a pile of snow into it,” Kay said. “I’ve been asking the boys to fix it all summer.”
“I can do it,” Jen said. “I love lake projects.”
“Sure, trying to make me look bad,” Jake said.
“You do that fine all by yourself,” Jen said, “but you can stay on mom’s good side by helping me.”
“You mean, ‘showing you,’” he said.
“I’m pretty sure I can figure out how to install a solar light by myself,” she said.
“Bet I could do it faster,” he said.
“What is this, sixth grade?” Jen asked.
“Mom, do you have two that need to be replaced?” Jake asked.
“No. Just the one—unless you’ve noticed others.”
“Let’s go look, then do them at the same time to see who finishes first,” Jake said.
“I’m not competing with you,” Jen turned and muttered. “So immature.”
She and Jake passed through the breezeway together and into the small supply closet, Kristin on their heels, where they stared at the shelves of tools, paint supplies, and a box of solar lights.
“Have you installed one of these before?” Jake asked, sliding the battery pack onto the drill.
“Nope,” she said.
“I’ll time you.”
She rolled her eyes. “And, you’ll be faster on the second one because you’ll learn from my trial run.”
“How am I supposed to time you if I can’t watch you?”
“I’ll set my iPhone stopwatch.” She grabbed the box of solar lights and the bag of tools. Jake dropped a bit in the drill and followed.
They went to the front door and Jen called to Kay, “We’re going out to fix the lights now.”
Kay appeared around the corner. “Kristin, do you want grandma to read you a story?”
“Yes!” Kristin exclaimed, returning to Kay.
Jen winked at Kay, as she and Jake walked out the door.
They located the busted solar light on one of the six posts that lined the driveway and opened the box and laid out the materials. Jen set the stopwatch on her phone.
“Turn around.” Jake did as she commanded. She set the stopwatch and quickly removed the old solar light and placed the base of the new light on the top of the square post. Only 90 seconds passed. She drilled holes for the base and set it carefully on top. Two minutes passed. Just as she was using the Phillips screwdriver on the last screw for the base, the dogs barked at the crunch of wheels on the gravel driveway. Four minutes invested thus far.
A black Suburban came into view through the woods as it rounded the corner, approaching the lake cabin. The truck bore Wisconsin license plates, and two people were in the front seat.
“I wonder who that is?” Jake asked.
“I can’t look up,” Jen said, still screwing. “I’m on a roll.”
“They’re probably lost,” he said.
He left Jen’s side and walked into the driveway where the truck came to a stop about twenty feet from Jen. The dogs barked at full volume, sounding the alarm for everyone in the county.
Jake went to the driver’s side, and Jen heard him talking in muffled tones over the sound of the engine. She still didn’t look up, assuming the visitors were lost and needed directions. She was at the six-minute mark, the finish line in sight.
When a truck door opened and the engine turned off, however, Jen looked up from attaching the solar reflective box to the base. She blinked twice, her eyes sending an incomprehensible message to her brain—Amanda was walking from the passenger side, crossing in front of the truck, on a direct course toward Jen. It can’t be. I’m dreaming.
Jen was so taken aback that her brain momentarily stopped working. She dropped the screwdriver, barely missing her pinky toe, then fumbled with the remaining pieces of the solar light, bobbling them. Her fingers chased the pieces, thrusting them into the air. She didn’t bother watching them fall to the ground, her eyes instead remaining on the woman who so vexed her. Who was coming at her with determination. Whose eyes were intense with life. With energy. With wattage. With perception. With love. Those all-knowing eyes.
Amanda looked as natural in the Northwoods as an alien from outer space. Clad in urban-camo pants, a white, gauzy shirt over a tight tank, and TOMS, she looked sophisticated, polished and gorgeous. Her hair and scant makeup were perfectly done, and an expensive bag hung over her shoulder.
Jen’s heart suddenly stopped. Started. Lurched. Then jumped out of her chest. The mere sight of Amanda threw Jen’s world out of orbit. The first 10 seconds of seeing her claimed an inordinate number of Jen’s heartbeats.
Dry heat crawled up Jen’s throat, her eyes drilling into Amanda’s, and she was reassured that Amanda was alive and very real. As only lovers can, they exchanged vital information in the first few seconds of laying eyes on each other.
Jen was surprised. Amanda’s usual supreme sense of confidence was replaced with a vulnerable demeanor. Dark circles camped below her almond-shaped eyes, accentuating their deep brown color. She hasn’t been sleeping .
When Jen’s gaze fell to Amanda’s mouth, she saw an insecure, tentative smile that broke her heart. All of Amanda’s nervousness made Jen feel more guilty—if that was possible—about being with Victoria. She didn’t want that type of control over Amanda’s happiness. It was too much power, something Jen had always shunned.
The sickening taste of betrayal stung the back of Jen’s throat, so she quickly averted her eyes from Amanda’s inquisitive gaze. “You’re here.”
Amanda stopped a few feet from Jen. “I hope it’s okay. I missed you and Kristin so much that I had to see you.”
“Come here,” Jen’s voice said without prompting.
Amanda didn’t waste any time, springing toward Jen and throwing her arms around her neck. “I love you so much,” Amanda whispered, her eyes misting over.
God, she smells like a field of lavender, Jen thought. The fiery cocktail of guilt and shame mixed in Jen’s stomach, choking off her ability to say, I love you too.
Amanda showered kisses along Jen’s neck in such a flurry that Jen couldn’t think straight . “I missed you. I missed you. I missed you.”
Jen’s knees buckled.
“I can’t live without you,” Amanda whispered frantically.
Finding the right words proved difficult, but Jen managed, “I missed you too.” The simple admission liberated her heavy heart.
“I’m sorry for everything.” Amanda kissed Jen’s lower lip, then quickly retreated to look at her.
“Me too,” Jen said earnestly, knowing that Amanda had no clue that she was sorry for not only running to Wisconsin but also sleeping with Victoria.
Amanda kissed Jen again, her soft lips delivering high voltage shocks that converted Jen’s heart into a faster rhythm .
Jen pressed her mouth to Amanda’s, kissing her tenderly at first. Then eagerly. Then deeply, submersing herself in the velvety warmth that welcomed her home. Home to Amanda.
The universe snapped to attention and realigned Jen’s existence. She dropped any feelings she might have had for Victoria in the freezer.
A coarse throat-clearing, however, reminded Jen that they weren’t alone. She reluctantly broke from the kiss to see Jake walking toward them.
“I’m glad you’re here,” Jen said against Amanda’s lips.
“I’m so relieved,” Amanda breathed, nervously smoothing her hair.
Jake impolitely tapped Jen on the shoulder, ignoring any sense of intimacy between the two women. “Are you going to introduce me?”
“Good God, Jake. You have absolutely no manners.” Jen broke away from Amanda but kept her arm around Amanda’s waist.
“Welcome,” he said. “I’m Jake.” He thrust his hand at Amanda.
While extending her hand, Amanda attempted a cool smile, but Jen noticed her lips shillyshally.
Good, I kissed her off balance. “Jake, this is my…Amanda.” Jen was so messed up that she just couldn’t even say fiancée. “Amanda, this is my younger brother, Jake, a real pain in the ass.” Jen’s thumb nervously snaked across her empty ring finger.
“Pleased to meet you,” Amanda said stiffly. When nervous, she always defaulted to formal manners.
The driver of the black Suburban joined their circle. Jen extended her hand. “Welcome. I’m Jen.”
“I’m Dave Monroe, one of the Hawthorne family pilots.”
“Dave was kind enough to drive me up here,” Amanda said.
“Where did you fly into?” Jake asked.
“Eau Claire,” Dave said. “They have a nice airport there, and they can refuel the same day.”
“Good to know,” Jake said, impressed.
Amanda suddenly twisted sideways and slapped her arm, then flicked a flattened mosquito from her skin. “Christ! That mosquito was huge!”
With tremendous effort, Jake and Jen suppressed smiles.
“Welcome to the Northwoods,” Jen said. “I think they like your hair product.” They all looked up to see a swarm of gargantuan mosquitos and gnats above Amanda’s head.
When Amanda tilted her back to look, too, she acted like Freddy Krueger was hovering above her with an axe. “Holy shit!” She swirled her hands overhead, swooshing a few away, barely making a dent.
“Why don’t we go inside?” Jen suggested, before Amanda freaked out and ran back to the truck. “Would you like a cup of coffee?”
“I’d love one,” Amanda and Dave said in unison.
Jen slipped her hand through Amanda’s and pulled her along the brick walkway toward the front door. “Kristin will be so thrilled to see you.”
“I can’t wait,” Amanda squeezed Jen’s hand.
Jen opened the front door wide. “Kristin, someone is here to see you!”
As they entered the breezeway, Kristin came running from the living room, her eyes round and curious. When she saw Amanda, she exclaimed, “Mama Man!”
Tommy laughed.
Amanda dropped her bag and held out her arms. “Baby!”
Kristin sprang into a jump, landing in Amanda’s arms. They hugged so tightly that Jen thought it looked painful.
“I missed you, big girl!” Amanda said. “Are you having fun?”
“I can swim!” Kristin exclaimed.
“Swim?” Amanda said. “I can’t wait to see!”
A lump the size of Texas formed in Jen’s throat.
The entire Dawson family quickly made their way to the breezeway. Amanda had met Roger and Kay when they had visited the week of Kristin’s birth, but that was almost two years ago and very brief.
“Welcome to our cabin,” Kay said, pushing her sons aside and coming to Amanda for a hug.
“Thank you,” Amanda said, unaccustomed to such an all-encompassing hug, especially with Kristin in her arms.
Jen was relieved when Kay pulled back and winked at her.
“Good to see you again.” Roger gave Amanda a light hug.
“Thank you. You too,” she said, still balancing Kristin on her hip.
Patrick was next. “I’m Patrick. Do you play Dungeons and Dragons?”
Jen couldn’t recall ever seeing Amanda completely and totally knocked off balance by such a benign request.
“I, uh,” Amanda stammered, “would be willing to learn.”
“Perfect,” Patrick said. “I’ve heard how smart and creative you are, so I’m sure you’ll be a natural.”
Nervous laughter rumbled around the group.
“See?” Tommy asked. “I told you she’d love to.” Tommy’s mischievous Italian eyes twinkled at Jen.
And the rivalry begins, Jen thought. I hope he’s not pissed that she’s here.
“Hi Tommy,” Amanda said cautiously. “How’s your arm?”
He held it up and flexed his bicep. “Feeling better.”
“I’m so relieved. After all, you were wounded saving me,” Amanda said.
“Bah. All in the line of duty,” he said. “‘So, what’s a dazzling urbanite like you doing in a rustic setting like this?’”
Amanda faltered for a second, so Jen piped up. “I invited her—”
Patrick blurted, “ Blazing Saddles!”
Tommy nodded. “Righto. Who said it?”
Patrick clicked his fingers and pursed his lips for a few seconds then said as if on Jeopardy , “Who is Gene Wilder?!”
“Well done,” Tommy said, patting Patrick on the shoulder.
“I remember that line,” Roger said. “One of my favorite movies.”
“Well, before we get lost in Blazing Saddles quotes,” Kay said, “let’s continue the introductions, shall we?”
“I’m Roger, Jen’s father,” Roger said, extending his hand to Dave.
“I’m Dave Monroe, the Hawthornes’ pilot.”
“Pleasure to meet you,” Roger said. “Come in. Come in.” Roger said to Tommy as they passed through to the dining area, “‘They’re staying in droves.’”
“Harvey Korman,” Tommy said.
Roger snorted with approval.
“I promised them some coffee,” Jen said, nervously setting off toward the coffee maker.
Amanda followed, still carrying Kristin, who was examining Amanda’s thick curls, not unlike her own, now tightening in the humid lake air.
“You’re so tan,” Amanda whispered to Jen while she was filling the coffeemaker with water. “You look fantastic.”
Warmth spread from Jen’s fingertips to her tan toes. Unfortunately, so did flaming spears of guilt. “Thanks. I feel grungy next to you though.” She filled the bean grinder and pressed the button.
“You look happy and relaxed,” Amanda said when Jen released the button and the noise stopped.
Can she tell I had sex last night? Ashamed, Jen felt shabby and exposed in her loose tank. She poured the ground coffee into the basket. “I’m happier now that you’re here.”
“I’m sorry for surprising you.” Amanda ran her knuckles down Jen’s bronzed forearm, brushing the tiny, bleach-blonde hairs that adored her touch. “I missed you so much.”
Jen pressed the start button on the coffeemaker and turned around to face Amanda, feeling every bit the two-timing heel. “I missed you too, and I’m ecstatic that you’re here.” She fought back the queasy feeling in her stomach and hugged Amanda and Kristin both.
“Both mommies here!” Kristin exclaimed during the hug.
When they released, and Jen looked into Amanda’s eyes, she saw unabashed love, which made her feel even worse.
“I’m so excited to be here,” Amanda whispered.
Jen attempted a smile then turned to open the cupboard.