Macon Georgia
May of 1855
Try as he might, William could not get Ellie out of his head. It was nothing but lunacy; sheer, God forsaken madness. Why in the world would he be smitten by the likes of Ellie Smith? She was contrary, aloof, difficult, angry and short tempered, not the attributes he wanted in a wife.
She was also attractive, strong willed, and, he somehow sensed, vulnerable in a place she covered up by being contrary, aloof, difficult, angry and short tempered. Get through that hurt, and maybe she was the kind of woman with whom he could share a life.
Thinking about Ellie made him lose focus, and the intricate carving he was creating needed his full attention. One slip of his chisel could ruin a whole panel to the vanity, and he would never finish the damn thing on time.
William stared blankly at the wood mounted on his workbench, the chisel motionless in his hand. Useless, he thought, putting the tool down. He sat, absently reaching for his cup and sipping the cold coffee.
He did not want to marry. Not as a slave. If he could ever afford to buy his freedom, well, then maybe. He had saved $500, but needed at least $2,000, and probably more given how much he earned for his master with his skilled labor. And if he married Ellie, he would have to buy her, as well, and a quadroon like Ellie would go for even more, if the family would sell her at all.
Marry her? What the hell was he thinking? How had that thought even entered his mind? He did not want to marry her. Jesus, Mary and Joseph, what was this woman doing to him?
After all, he was comfortable since he had a successful trade and a master who was fully occupied as a banker and mostly let him be so long as he did his work. No beatings or lashings, no back breaking field work to destroy his health and put him in an early grave. Food, shelter, Sundays off to do mostly as he pleased.
Getting married, having children, the constant worry about separation and the eventual sale of his own flesh and blood with nothing he could do to stop it, let alone having to deal with a woman as pig headed as Ellie Smith. No, definitely not, thank you very much. Who needed that? Not him.
So why was he working so hard to convince himself? It was nothing but lunacy, sheer, God forsaken madness.
And yet he felt himself slipping off that cliff, try as hard as he could to grab on to the nearest tree root. Damnation. The heart is the heart, he thought, and the heart wants what the heart wants, and the devil take the brain.