Chapter 19
Stupid Little Twerp Brother
One day, Mom tells the children in the morning that she has something important to do at the school and must work late that night. Charlie sighs to hear this news. I know he prefers it when Mom comes home and Mark is around.
He has been opening up more to Mark lately, but they only discuss small matters. They chat about things like:
1. Cooking. Charlie asks Mark if he can teach him how to make French toast. Charlie loves breakfast foods. Anything with maple syrup.
2. Charlie’s science teacher. He admires Mr. Carver! Charlie says Mr. Carver makes the world sound interesting.
3. Songs on the radio. Mark likes old stuff, and Charlie likes bands Mark has never heard of.
I think it is progress. A little at a time.
Charlie, Victoria, and Aidan all arrive home from school at the same time. Charlie hooks Gretel up to her leash and immediately takes her for a walk. He is probably trying to avoid Aidan, but perhaps he is also hoping to run into his new friend Ronaldo on the street.
Gretel is considered a striking dog. She is large and impressive. Humans like to show her off.
That’s all it is.
It’s no problem. I’m not jealous one bit. I know who Charlie loves best.
I heard Victoria tease Charlie at the kitchen table one night as they were doing their homework. She said she’d seen him with Ronaldo in the lunchroom at school. He shrugged it off. She then said she’d also seen Charlie with Ronaldo at his locker, laughing about something. So it sounds like Charlie really does have a new friend. He smiled when Victoria mentioned it, shaking his head as if it was not important. But Charlie can be quiet and shy, so I know that this is a big deal. I’m proud of him!
After Charlie leaves, Victoria and Aidan shrug off their spring coats and grab a drink in the kitchen. Aidan chugs down half a can of soda as if he’s dying of thirst.
Victoria tells Aidan that Kevin had to stay after school for math team. And then she asks Aidan if he wants to go up to her bedroom.
I watch him hesitate. And then say okay.
I follow, my heart contracting in anger. My long fur stands on end. Aidan is not allowed upstairs! For goodness sake! I cannot believe Victoria is breaking the rules again.
I skitter into the bedroom just as Victoria is closing the door. She waits for my long tail to float behind me and out of harm’s way before shutting the door with a click.
“You’re letting your psycho cat in here with us?” Aidan asks, sitting on her pink bedspread. “Your cat hates me. Just like your dad hates me.” He pauses, staring out at the light gray of the sky beyond the treetops. “I guess your brothers hate me too. Wow. I hadn’t really realized how much your entire family hates me until this moment.”
Well! Whose fault is that?
I give him a scowl. He sees me and frowns.
Victoria stands across the room, looking absentmindedly at the knickknacks on her bureau. Picking one up. Putting it down. “You know, if you ever invited me to your house, we could hang out there instead.” I hear a tinge of frustration in her voice.
“Vicky.” He turns to look at her. “You don’t want to go to my house. I know you don’t believe me. But trust me, you don’t. It’s not nice, like your house.”
Well. I wasn’t under the impression that our cottage was anything special. There’s dust in the corners, mold in the bathroom, and rugs that sometimes feel damp under my paws.
I suppose, however, we do have plenty of cozy spots. Aidan seems to think the green couch downstairs is his special place, the same way I think of Charlie’s bed as my favorite place to curl up. But he shouldn’t feel that way. This isn’t his house to lay claim to.
I rub up against Victoria’s leg, and then turn and give a sharp hiss! at Aidan. I don’t want Victoria to forget what he did.
That is, I don’t want her to forget that I pretended he hurt me.
His eyes open wide. “You see?” He points at me. “I didn’t do anything to her. That thing is evil.”
“She’s not evil.” Victoria spins and takes a step closer to him. “But maybe she’s scared of you. You did hurt her the other day. You probably stepped on her tail. Maybe you didn’t realize it, but you did.” When Aidan makes a face at her, she gasps. “Why are you such an asshole? I also asked you to talk to people at school and find out who is bullying Charlie. You want to know what Tasha said when I talked to her about it? Do you seriously want to know?”
“No,” he says, “But I can see you’re going to tell me anyway.”
“She said—she said maybe you’re the one bullying Charlie. And you know what? I realized you’ve never been that nice to him. It kinda makes sense.” She shakes her head. “It’s not you, is it?”
At first, Aidan doesn’t move as her question sinks in. Apparently he didn’t see this question coming, because he truly seems to have no idea how to respond.
He springs up off the bed and starts pacing in a circle around Victoria’s small room. His sneakers barely make a sound on the rug.
“You’re serious?” He doesn’t stop moving, shaking out his hands by his sides. “You’re serious. You are seriously asking me that. Wow.”
“Aidan . . .” One of Victoria’s small braids falls across her cheek, and she grabs it and pulls on it. Her voice softens a bit as she sees his reaction, the way he has suddenly become agitated. “I just don’t know what to think. You’re not very nice to Charlie.”
Aidan shakes his head violently, as if he doesn’t want to hear it. “I’m not nice to my little sister either. Just like my older brother isn’t nice to me. That’s how it works, isn’t it? The circle of life? What goes around, comes around?”
Victoria watches him, eyes wide.
Back and forth he walks, from window to wall, and back again. “If you haven’t noticed, I’m not nice to anyone. Except to you.” Now he finally stops and turns on her, his voice shaking with anger. “I love you. Do you hear me? Do you?” His voice gets louder and more passionate as he goes on: “JESUS CHRIST, Vicky. How can you even think I would do that to Charlie? I would crawl on my hands and knees on broken glass for you. And you know it. YOU KNOW IT.” He balls his hands into fists by his sides.
Victoria tips her head to one side, watching him. She reminds me of myself, when I’m perched on the bookcase and I’m fascinated by a strange bird I see outside the window. Just taking it all in.
“You’re one of the few people on earth who can stand me, Vic. Not many people can. This works. We work. Why would I mess that up? Why would I hurt Charlie? What in the hell would I do that for? What would my motivation be, exactly?”
Victoria turns away from the intensity of his outburst, and breezes past him to take a seat on her bed. I jump up and climb into Victoria’s lap. I want to shield her from Aidan, but she doesn’t seem scared. Her hand is steady as she scratches my head. “Aidan. Don’t get so worked up. Come on. I was just asking you a question.”
He stares at her, looking wounded. “Yeah. So now I realize you don’t trust me.”
“Aidan.”
“What?” He throws up his hands. “You don’t, Vicky. You obviously don’t.” He takes in a deep, shaky breath. “Wow. You’re the one person I thought who . . .”
“Who what?”
“Never mind.” He chews on his lip, and walks over to the window. The clouds lay low out over the river. The whole day is washed in a wet haze. His eyes, half-open, scan the marsh. Voice quieter, Aidan goes on: “You’re the one person in the world who I thought actually liked me, that’s all.” He turns his head slightly toward Victoria, but looks down at the pink shaggy rug under his feet. Waiting for her reply. Needing to hear it.
“I do like you.” She puts the end of one of her little braids in her mouth again and starts chewing on it. “I’ve always liked you.”
“I hope that’s true. I don’t know what I’d do if that wasn’t true.” Aidan raises his hand and runs it through his hair. He suddenly looks tired. “Why though? Why do you like me?”
“What?”
“It’s a serious question, Vic. Why do you like me? I mean . . . when exactly did it suddenly occur to you that you liked me?”
Hmmph! I would like to hear the answer to this question too.
Victoria takes her braid and throws it behind her shoulder. “I dunno.” She rubs her hands together as if wiping off sand. “Maybe it was when I noticed you’re the only one who laughs at all of my stupid jokes in history class, no matter how bad they are. Or maybe it was because you always write goofy little drawings on my notebooks.” She leans back on her hands. “Or maybe I noticed you when you started wearing your bathing suit to gym class—you know, the board shorts? It was kinda quirky. And cute.”
Aidan rolls his eyes. “Oh my God. That’s pathetic.” He snorts. “As if that was by choice. I had nothing else to wear because our washing machine died.”
“I guess it’s a good thing it did. Because that caught my eye. Your amazingly hot blue bathing suit.”
I glance up at Victoria, as I am still sitting in her lap. When I wink at her, she winks back and grins.
Lifting his head to look at her, Aidan sighs. Her smile seems to calm him down. I watch as his shoulders relax a little, and he tips his head back for a moment and breathes in again. I can almost see his anger wash off him, melting away.
“Vicky. Listen. It’s not me. I’m not the one hurting your brother. But I have a suggestion for who it might be. I’m sorry to bring this up. There’s only one person who ever bruised me like that. Like the way you see with Charlie. I didn’t want to say anything before. But if I were you, I’d know who did that to Charlie.”
Victoria’s hand, which was gently combing my fur with her fingers, stops suddenly. “What?”
“You heard me.” Aidan shoves his hands in his pockets. “There’s only one person who would do that in my family. Maybe you should take a closer look at yours.”
Her eyes light up, as she realizes what he is implying.
“I’m sorry, Vic. But you know your dad is as high as a kite most of the time, right? I mean, you never talk about it. But you’re aware of that, aren’t you? He’s either drinking a lot or taking too much of that Valium.” He shakes his head. “Possibly both. Or maybe he’s hooked on something stronger.”
“Aidan.” Her voice is suddenly hard and angry. “That’s not true. I know you don’t like him but—”
“I can’t believe you don’t see it.”
“See what? There’s nothing to see. He’s tired. And really stressed out.” Her hands sink deeper into my fur, and she clutches at my sides. I tense up, prepared for her to move or stand.
With a sudden move, Aidan swiftly turns and sits down right next to Victoria on the bed. I jump up, frightened.
I’ve never liked to get too close to Aidan. And his movements today are startling me.
He slips his arms around Victoria’s waist, and she immediately turns to him and puts her hands on his neck. He pulls her down onto the bed so they are lying down.
“Forget it. Forget I said anything. Oh God,” he mumbles into her hair. “I wouldn’t hurt you, Vic. Or your stupid little twerp brother.”
“Okay.” She strokes his head. “Okay. Chill out. I believe you.” She kisses his cheek. “But you need to be nicer to Charlie. Promise me you will be.”
“Yeah, yeah. I promise. I told you. I love you.”
I watch the two of them nestle together and comfort each other, from the edge of the bed. My little heart squeezes in my chest. I jump down onto the rug and walk to the opposite side of the room.
What Aidan is saying makes sense to me. I hate to admit this, but I believe him when he says he is not the bully.
I don’t want to believe him. In a way, I wish Aidan were the bully. Because then we could get rid of him, and the solution would be easy. But Aidan is upset, and I think he speaks from the heart. He has not been nice to Charlie, but now that I’ve heard him out, I also don’t think he’s the one who has been physically hurting him.
What I cannot accept is what Aidan is implying. Who he is implicating.
That is not the Dad I know.
Maybe Aidan is not the bully, but he is dead wrong about this. Wrong, wrong, wrong.
I stick my nose into my paw, cleaning it furiously. I must wash this entire idea away. I feel as if I’ve walked in a sticky jam, and want to get it off of me as quickly as possible.