![]() | ![]() |
Erena started putting away her tools. From the corner of her eye, she watched as Matt hesitated at the door, leaning against the jamb. He looked like he wanted to stay in the workshop and say something to her.
Erena didn't want to admit it, not even to herself, but she desperately wanted to know his thoughts.
Too late, he was out the door and gone.
Erena carefully closed up the paint can, hammering the lid back into place and walking the brush over to the sink. She carefully rinsed it out, then put away the rest of the tools and hardware, listening to the conversations and laughter happening outside. It was a happy group, and tonight was a night to celebrate. She turned off the lights, stepped outside, and locked the door. Visible between the cabins in front of her, the fire pit flickered. The scents of wood smoke and cooking meat reached her nose. She started forward, surprised at how hungry she was.
Matt stepped out of the shadows next to one of the cabins. He stood right in her path. He was silhouetted by the fire, so she couldn't see his features.
She squinted and stepped closer so she could make out his face. "Is everything okay?"
"I heard the others talking," he said. "A few of them going to go up to that pub in Helene tonight after dessert."
“To celebrate with Nina?” Erena asked. A pub seemed like a weird choice for celebrating a pregnancy.
“No, just to hang out,” he said.
She put a hand on her hip and her face warmed as she saw his gaze flick up and down her body. "Okay."
"I want you to go with them," he said, raking a hand through his hair. "I want to meet you there. Like a date."
"I don't do dates," she said.
"Please go with them." He took a step forward, then reached out slowly, ever so slowly, and touched her chin. "I'll meet you there. I want to see you. I want to talk to you."
Her breath caught in her throat. He was so close, and he smelled good. Sage filled her nostrils, and her traitorous body had started associating the scent with arousal. Emotional distance was so much easier when she was keeping physical distance, too. But right now he stood in front of her, his body near hers, so close she could feel his body heat. Her insides clenched and her heart pumped erratically in her chest.
"I don't understand," she said. "Why do you want to meet me?"
He grinned, his teeth flashing white in the darkness. "I think we've been putting it off for long enough, don't you? Our epic love story for the ages."
She couldn't help her bark of laughter. The rest of the clan at the fire pit continued their conversations, but she was certain quite a few of them were also focused on her and Matt standing here in the shadows.
Matt, for his part, was unfazed. He raised his eyebrows. “You said love is just an idea, not real. Well, that’s how you start with the houses you build, right? You take the idea and make it into something real. What if we do that?”
She shook her head in disbelief. This man—he was so earnest, so direct. “Who are you?” she whispered.
Grinning, he said, "So? Will you be there?"
With another little laugh, she said, "We'll see. No promises."
"I'll see you there," he said, taking a step backward as if to leave.
“Wait,” she said, and he halted. She wasn’t quite ready to end this conversation. Her entire being yearned to be closer to him, to touch him, even as she tamped those feelings down. Scrambling for some other reason of why she might have stopped him, she finally landed on, "Why aren't you going into town with everyone else?"
"Jameson asked me to circle the territory, so I'm gonna do that now." He started taking his clothes off.
Nudity didn't bother her—as a shifter, she'd seen more dicks than she could count—but somehow him standing so close and removing his shirt, then reaching for the waistband of his pants, held a new meaning for her.
Face flaming, she hurried past him and joined the circle of people around the fire pit. She found herself sitting next to Parker, the newest member of the clan. She wasn't sure what his story was because he didn't talk much or share anything about himself.
Maybe he wouldn't be the newest member for long. Erena had overheard Gemma and Nina talking about Kayla formally petitioning Jameson in the hopes of permanently joining the Rock Creek Clan. They hadn't said anything about Matt petitioning, but Erena suspected he wouldn't be far behind Kayla. And if he was so convinced that there was something important between him and Erena, why wasn't he already asking to join?
It didn't matter. Jameson was already entrusting him with things like checking the perimeter. It had to mean something.
Shaking her head, she reminded herself that she didn't care.
Parker handed her a plate full of food and she took it with a murmured, "Thank you."
She ate the grilled meat and vegetables without really tasting them, her mind on Matt and his place in the clan. Should she go out with everyone tonight? Other than Margot's bakery, she didn't go out often. The hardware store. The grocery store. That was pretty much it. Going out with friends was something else entirely. Going out with friends and meeting a guy sounded even more bizarre.
She finished her meal and licked the juices from her fingertips.
Movement near the cabin closest to her caught her eye. She froze, fingers in her mouth, and stared into the darkness.
A mountain lion sat on its haunches, tail twitching, blue-green eyes locked on Erena.
She took her fingers out of her mouth and gave him a little wave. He loped away, back to his patrol duties.
"So, Jameson and I have a special announcement," Nina said from the other side of the fire.
Erena found herself smiling in anticipation of the news. Parker shot her a puzzled look, then returned his attention to Nina and Jameson, who stood hand in hand.
"We are going to have a baby," Nina said.
Shouts, catcalls, and applause echoed around the bonfire as their tiny group celebrated. Erena got out of her lawn chair and joined the others in hugging the happy couple. When she stepped away, Erena found herself face to face with her sister and Nolan.
Margot hugged her. It was hugs all around.
Pulling away, Erena asked, "Margot, Matt said some of you are going into town tonight?"
"Yeah," Margot said, "me, Nolan, Parker, and Kayla are going. Matt said he’d show a little later. You wanna come?"
"If you don’t mind," Erena answered, carefully ignoring her sister's inquisitive expression.
Margot's befuddlement turned to mild surprise, but she said smoothly, "Of course you can come with us. Nolan, we're leaving in what, fifteen minutes?"
The giant man nodded. "I'm driving. There's plenty of space in my car."
"Thanks," Erena said. "I’ll just go get changed and I'll meet you back out here."
She dashed to her cabin, making sure to snag one of Nina's cupcakes on the way. Nina squeezed Erena's hand one more time. Erena was surprised at the contact, but she smiled before pulling back. Things were looking up. She felt optimistic.
It was weird.
As soon as she made it into her cabin, she heard footsteps behind her. She turned and saw Margot.
"I wanted to help you get ready," Margot said.
Erena stared at her. "I know how to get dressed."
"But this, it's like a date," Margot said. "You're only going because Matt's going to be there."
"That doesn't make it a date," Erena said.
"Does too," Margot said. "Wear your dark jeans and that green sweater I got you for Christmas."
Erena opened her mouth to argue, but Margot was already bounding outside and toward her own cabin.
"How did I get such a bossy little sister?" Erena grumbled to herself as she walked to her dresser and opened the second drawer. The sweater was folded up, the tag still attached. She felt a flash of guilt that she hadn't worn it yet—she didn't hate it or anything, but she didn't really have a need for nice sweaters.
Sighing, she ripped off the tag and put it on. The fabric was soft instead of scratchy, and it fit against her body in a flattering way, emphasizing her breasts. As tempting as it was to ignore her sister's advice on jeans, she definitely couldn't go to a pub in the paint-stained jeans she had been wearing in the workshop. She took off the yucky ones and pulled on the dark blue ones Margot had recommended. Then she went into the bathroom and looked at herself in the mirror.
Her hair. What the fuck was she supposed to do with her hair? Down? Up? She took out the hair elastic and finger combed the blond locks. Nope, that wouldn't work. Her hair was creased from the ponytail. She could maybe make it go away by getting her hair wet and then blow drying it, but dammit, why was this so hard?
She put it back up in the ponytail, muttering, "Screw it."
The front door to her cabin banged open and she heard Margot's voice. "I brought you some boots."
"I have boots," Erena called back.
"You have work boots, and those don't count."
Erena stuck her tongue out at herself in the mirror and went into the living room to join Margot.
Margot wore a creamy white sweater and black leggings. Her blond hair fell in waves around her shoulders. She held her hands out like a game show assistant showcasing a pair of boots that she'd set on Erena's coffee table.
Erena hated to admit it, but the boots were gorgeous. Smooth leather, a tiny lift to the heel. They weren't dainty or overtly sexy, and they didn't say she was trying too hard to get attention. They were functional boots, but still attractive.
"I like those," Erena said.
"I thought you might," Margot said. "You can borrow them whenever you want."
Erena cocked her head and studied her sister. "Why are you being so nice to me?"
"Because I love you, stupid." Margot jumped forward and pulled Erena into a hug. "I missed you when you were gone and I'm glad you're back and I'm glad you're coming out tonight."
Erena swallowed past the thick feeling in her throat and disentangled herself from Margot's arms. "Let's get going."
She slid the boots onto her feet, marveling at how great they made her feel. How weird that putting on different clothes and a nice pair of shoes could make her feel prettier. She was the same person, just dressed up a little differently. Nothing had changed.
Right?
She put on her coat and they headed out. Nolan gave a low whistle when Erena and Margot met him at his black SUV. Margot took shotgun and Erena climbed in the back. She gave a start of surprise when she saw Parker and Kayla already sitting back there.
"Looking good, Erena," Kayla said, her voice bubbly like usual.
"Thanks." Erena still wasn't sure about Kayla. Did she have designs on Matt? Did it matter? Yes. Erena couldn’t pretend, even to herself, that she wouldn’t be jealous if Kayla liked Matt. "You look good, too," she added.
As they drove toward Helene, Erena noticed how Kayla seemed to be pushing closer to Parker's side of the seat. Seemed like she wasn't into Matt, after all.
The pub, Cattywompus, was situated in the middle of a block on Fifth Street. It was on the lower floor of a tall brick building nestled between a hair salon and a florist.
The five of them piled out of Nolan's car and walked down the sidewalk to the entrance to the pub. Cold night air felt sharp in Erena’s lungs, making her feel alive. Her boots made soft clunking sounds against the pavement, reminding her that she’d dressed up for this, that she was trying to impress someone.
Things had changed between her and Matt, so subtly and slowly, she’d barely noticed it happening.
Erena stepped in first, eager to see Matt. What would he think of her clothes? Would he notice that she'd added a layer of mascara to her lashes? Her green sweater hugged her curves and she felt sexy and new.
She scanned the pub, standing a little on her tiptoes to see everyone. Matt was nowhere in sight.
"He'll be here soon, don't worry," Margot said with a smile, trying to draw Erena forward.
Erena stopped short at a large blackboard propped up on an easel just inside the entryway. Her heart clawed its way up her throat at the sight of the words printed across the top in red chalk. Couples Night!
"What is it?" Margot asked.
Erena jabbed her with an elbow and hissed, "Look."
While Margot read the sign, Erena looked around the pub again. The Cattywompus was full of pairs. Couples of all ages, from fresh-faced twenty-somethings to distinguished-looking couples who likely had grown children. It seemed every couple in Idaho had come to the Cattywompus to show the world how in love they were.
"Just keep walking," Margot said. "It's okay."
"It's not okay," Erena said. "I barely want to admit this thing is a date, and he's not even here. On freaking couples night."
Margot hooked her arm in Erena's and led her to a circular booth in the corner. "I promise, he'll be here soon."
Everyone climbed into the booth and sat down. Margot sat next to Nolan; Kayla sat next to Parker. Erena sat on one end; she was definitely the odd woman out.
Looking between Margot and Erena, Kayla piped up, "Who's going to be here soon?"
"Matt," Nolan said.
Kayla raised her eyebrows. "Oh," she said in a voice of sudden understanding.
Erena's face felt hot and she pressed the back of her hand to her cheek, trying to cool it. She didn't like everybody thinking about her. It felt so open and raw. It wasn't their business, anyway.
Everyone had known she had a thing for Jake last year. And her return to the territory showed that things hadn't worked out—they would've guessed he'd rejected her.
A server approached their table bearing a small notebook and pen. He looked around the table. "Let's see, we have two couples and half a couple here today. Waiting for one more?"
"Yes," Margot said quickly, probably worried Erena was going to bite the guy's head off.
He nodded and his gaze landed on Erena. "Should we wait for your other half?"
"No," Erena snarled.
He blinked. "Okay. What can I get you?"
Everyone told him what they wanted and he headed back to the bar, giving wide berth to a couple making out at one of the high-top tables in the middle of the room.
The door to the pub was directly in Erena’s line of sight, and she willed Matt to walk through it.
Minutes passed. Couples around them held hands and stared at each other, gooey-eyed. They sat at bar stools, tables, and booths. Erena wanted to be disdainful, but honestly, she was jealous.
The conversation in Erena's booth was mostly carried by Margot and Kayla, with Nolan and Parker adding a word here and there. Erena let their conversation wash over her. She tried not to look at the door to the pub, but she couldn't avoid it. Every time it opened, her heart leapt into her throat. And every time a person stepped through, it wasn’t Matt, and Erena's heart fell right back down again.
The server returned with their drinks. "Still no partner?" he asked Erena.
She clenched her fists.
"Thanks for stating the obvious," Kayla said, accepting her drink.
The server gave out the rest of the drinks without another word, thankfully. Then he waggled his eyebrows at Erena. "If he doesn't show, I can always be your date."
"Seriously?" Nolan said, standing up. "Go do your job."
The server took one look at Nolan's giant frame and scrambled away.
Erena's face felt even hotter than before. This was stupid. Why had Matt asked her to come if he wasn't going to be here? Maybe he was toying with her. Maybe the feelings between them were one-sided like her feelings had been with Jake.
As if sensing Erena's anxiety, Margot reached over, squeezed her hand, and whispered, "Don't worry, he'll be here. He wanted to see you."
Erena nodded without saying anything. She was afraid if she opened her mouth, she'd choke up.
Kayla peppered Parker with questions about his life before the RCC, but he gave her one-word answers and she turned her attention back to Margot. The two of them talked about cupcake flavors while Erena tried not to stare at the couple at the high-top table who were practically sucking each other's faces off.
Someone at the bar gave a whistle at the couple making out, and several of the other couples in the pub whistled and catcalled, too. The couple broke apart, laughing.
From across the room, the server caught her eye and winked. She glowered back until his face went pale and he skittered away.
After a few more minutes of bakery chatter, Erena slid out of the booth. She had to get out of here. She couldn't handle the idea that she been stood up on something that wasn't even a real date. She'd put on mascara for this farce.
Margot reached over and yanked Erena back down to her seat. "Patience, grasshopper."
Erena sensed that the others were studiously not looking at her. They were shifters—they had to pick up on the tension. This was humiliating.
"I need some air," she said out loud and stood up again. Before Margot could grab her, she stepped away from the table. "I'll be back in a minute."
Maybe. Maybe she'd be back. She wished she had driven herself here, because then she could just drive home, step into her shower, and pretend this night never happened.
Except everyone else knew.
She'd walk home, that's what she would do. Or get a cab, or something. She couldn't think things through, not when the close air of the bar was so hot against her face, not when her skin was so tight with nerves, every tactile sensation an attack on her psyche.
Kayla gave her a sympathetic look which, for some crazy reason, made Erena want to cry.
"I could come outside and hang out with you, if you like," Kayla said.
"I'm actually not feeling well," Erena said. "I'm gonna call a cab."
"No, don't go yet," Margot said. "We just got here."
"Actually, it's been an hour," Nolan said.
"Real helpful," Margot said, glaring at him.
Nolan raised his hands. "Sorry."
"He's right, though," Erena said, feeling utterly defeated. "I've been here for a while, and it's been fun, but I have to get up early tomorrow and get to work on that house. So, thanks guys. Enjoy the rest of the night."
She turned on her heel and retreated back across the pub in the beautiful boots that had made her feel so pretty not that long ago.