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Erena looked up at the second squeak of her workshop's door. Matt stood there, his broad shoulders taking up the doorway, blocking the mid-morning sunlight that glinted off of the snow.
Her heart thumped happily at the sight of him, and she smiled at herself. Every damn time she saw him, a little loop of excitement started in her gut and worked its way up to her chest to make her heart pound. Would it ever stop? She didn't think so.
"I have to tell you something," he said.
"Okay. First, I have to tell you something." She stood and walked over to him, then leaned against his chest. His sage scent was a comfort and a turn-on at the same time and she pulled it into her nose, holding it there. Tilting her head up, she kissed his jaw, then his lips.
He didn't move to deepen the kiss, but she shelved her disappointment. He had something to say, and they could kiss later. Or sooner. She wasn't picky about the when of it, as long as he let her have her fill.
Stepping back, she smiled up at him. "Okay, let's hear it so we can get back to the kissing."
His smile was strange—incomplete. She took in the air around him. The feline scent of him, beneath his signature sage, was tinged with something different. An emotion. She hadn't smelled an emotion like this from him before, and it took her a second to recognize the dark undertones of stone and rain. It was sorrow.
"What's wrong?" she asked. "You're sad. Why?"
He shook his head. "There's a lot I need to tell you, but before I say any of it, you have to know that I've never lied about you and me."
That was...unexpected. She took another step back. Distance. She needed a little space, maybe. This sounded heavy and suddenly she wanted to go back in time, maybe five minutes before, and kiss him until he forgot why he was here.
Rubbing the back of his neck, he said, "I've been working for Bronson this whole time."
"What? Bronson, from the Bitterroot Pack?"
"Yes." Matt nodded, his face solemn.
That scent of sorrow became stronger, tried to wrap itself around Erena's mouth and nose, clogging her throat. She waved her hand in the air. "That's impossible."
"No, it isn't. It's actually very possible, and it would only work with me. Kayla doesn't even know."
She laughed in disbelief. "You can't tell me that you've come to a clan of shifters and successfully deceived us all with half-truths about why you're here. Matt, we can tell."
"Not with me."
He looked regretful—no, he looked completely wrecked.
Somewhere, beyond her body, things were happening. Bright conversations of her clan mates filtered through the flimsy walls of her workshop. Behind her, wood glue was silently drying on the mattress frame she'd just constructed.
But inside, alarm bells were blaring and her heart was pounding fast—too fast.
"See," Matt said, holding his hands out like he would reach for her, "I can tell lies. It's a...a skill I have."
The words clanged in the workshop. I can tell lies. Erena could imagine each word lined up like a nail and pounded into a two-by-four. She wanted to take the claw side of a hammer and rip each one out, one by one.
She scented the air, searched for the lie. But if he could sneak lies past people, then what was stopping him from lying now?
"This doesn't make any sense," she said.
"I learned when I was young. I had to—it was the only way to feed myself and my brothers, poaching from the alpha's hunting grounds. If I didn't want to be beaten for it, I had to lie. As soon as my brothers were old enough, we ran away."
Her heart clenched at the thought of a young Matt being beaten for his hunger.
"Bronson figured out what I could do," he continued. "He's been using me to get info on the RCC. I stopped talking to him, but we're—"
"I can't do this," Erena said. She forced the words out, even though her heart felt like it was cracking. He'd been lying to her, all this time. Nothing, nothing, should have stopped him from telling her what was really going on.
"I know. I know," he said, reaching out. "I'm going to tell Jameson as soon as I can get him on the phone—"
"No, you. I can't be with you."
He stared earnestly into her eyes. "Yes, you can. We're mates, Erena. We're fated to be together. I love you."
"No," she said. "No. Stop. Maybe our shifter sides chose each other, maybe we were meant to be together. But my human side will not do this again. Just stay away. Go. Go back to wherever you came from, Bronson and the Bitterroots, I don't fucking care."
"But—we marked each other. We love each other."
"Love is just a feeling, and scars, well..." She blinked back tears. "They're just another sign someone's been hurt."
She pushed past him, careful not to brush his arm with hers. She didn't want to touch him, didn't want the memories of his skin, his muscles, his power, his pleasure.
The door screeched as she shoved it open. Ahead of her, some of the others sat around the fire, getting ready to have lunch together. She stomped toward them, her breath coming fast.
"Erena, wait, we have to talk," Matt said from behind her.
His footsteps were close. She closed her eyes for a millisecond, and in that millisecond, she buried all the love she'd felt, all the lies she'd believed. Then she marched the rest of the way to the fire pit.
"Erena, what's wrong?" Margot asked. She was still wearing her cap from the bakery, and there was a bit of flour on her chin.
It was a struggle to find air. Erena's chest felt like an entire cabin was resting on top of it, squeezing everything out, smothering her of all the love, all the light.
"He's a—" She couldn't finish, she couldn't catch her breath. Each beat of her heart was a thudding reminder of emptiness.
Turning slightly, she saw that Matt stood behind her at the edge of the Ring of Fire, half in shadows. Would he run when Erena spoke the truth? They were all in danger if Bronson was sending the Bitterroots to the Rock Creek territory.
"He's a liar," Erena said again, trying to hold in her sobs. "He's a liar and a spy—he's been spying for the Bitterroots this entire time."
"But...that's ridiculous," Nina said. "Matt, are you spying for Bronson?"
"He can tell lies!" Erena shouted, tears streaming down her cheeks for everyone to see. She angrily wiped them away. "Don't you get it? Anything he says, it could be a lie, and we won't even know it."
"I'm not lying now—" Matt started, but Rex and Nolan had already closed in on him.
She spared one glance behind her as she ripped off her shirt and pants. Rex and Nolan had grabbed Matt's arms, and Parker, Nina, and Margot surrounded them, standing at the ready. Kayla sat, stricken, in one of the old lawn chairs.
"Kayla's not a part of it," Erena added. "At least, I don't think so. But I don't really know."
Matt could've been lying about Kayla, too.
Parker turned from Matt to look at Kayla.
"I can't tell lies," Kayla said.
"How do we know that?" Parker asked.
Kayla stood up, and Erena wondered, absently, if she'd fight Parker. Erena wondered if she cared whether they fought. She wondered if she'd ever care about anything again.
"Please, listen," Matt said, struggling forward, his body straining toward Erena's.
Her heart wanted to stay and listen, but her mind recognized a fool—again. She'd been tricked. It was Jake all over again.
She didn't want to cry, she wouldn't allow it. Not here in front of everyone. And certainly not in front of Matt.
Foxes couldn't cry. Crouching low to the frost-dusted pine needles, Erena let her animal take over.
"Erena, wait," he called.
And then she ran.