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It was only once she'd reached her porch that Erena shifted back into her human form. She liked the pain of her bones cracking and reforming, her skin expanding, her muscles and sinews shifting. The transformation was another welcome distraction.
She wasn't sure how much time had passed since she'd left the rest of the clan in the woods, but she guessed they would return to the Ring of Fire soon. Being here, letting them see her cry, was the very last thing she wanted. So she stepped into her cabin and went straight for the shower.
The pounding of the water filled her fiberglass shower stall. She leaned her head against the tile accents trimming the sides and let the coolness of them soothe her too-hot cheeks.
The fight could have gone so much worse. She was shocked, still, that the leopard hadn't turned around and clawed the shit out of her. If Matt hadn't shown up, would the others have caught up to Erena and killed her? She didn't know, and she likely never would.
And now what did it mean? Matt had been working for Bronson, all this time. Jameson would probably banish him from the territory—it's what Jameson had done to Jake, after all, when Jake had challenged him and lost. Matt might be gone in the morning.
She still loved Matt, that was the part that killed her. They were mates, and she loved him, but he was a liar.
Once the water was warm—maybe too warm—she stepped in. The steam enveloped her, blurring out her surroundings. Invisible was the shower curtain that desperately needed a wipe-down, invisible were the bottles of shampoo and conditioner, invisible was the faucet. She was alone in a sea of white fog.
Finally—finally—she could really cry.
"Erena?"
She shrieked. What the fuck—that was Matt's voice. Why was he here?
"It's just me," he said.
She wanted to scream at him to get the hell out of her cabin, but the words stuck in her throat. When she opened her mouth to say something, anything, a sob came out.
"Erena, sweetheart," he said unhappily.
A second later, the shower curtain moved to the side and he stepped in.
She crossed her arms over her stomach and glared at him. She had an idea of what she looked like right now—naked and pissed, her eyes narrowed, her hair half-wet because she hadn't stepped all the way under the spray yet. She didn't give a fuck.
But Matt looked worse. His full lips were turned down in a pain-filled expression, and his eyes were wet and rimmed in red. He looked like he'd been crying, too.
"Why are you here?" she asked with less anger than she'd felt a second ago.
"To tell you the truth."
She shook her head. "Right. Like I can trust you."
"I hope someday you will again."
Her heart was very much in danger of trusting him even now. It wasn't fair, when he stood before her like this, goosebumps spreading over his skin, his emotion-filled eyes staring directly into hers, his hands outstretched like he was trying to reach her.
"I can't handle being hurt again," she said.
Stepping forward, he pulled her into his arms. She felt the steady beating of his heart as he said, "I will never hurt you again. Never. I might fuck up, but I won't lie to you. It killed me to lie before, and this was why—because I was afraid of hurting you. I came to you as a spy and a liar, but that's over now. I'm one hundred percent with you and with this clan."
The magic that joined their souls tugged at her heart. Maybe if they were human, this would never work. But her soul and her heart recognized the purity in his. She knew him on a level that went beyond the ordinary. And she knew that his lie had begun before he'd even met her, before he knew her, before their animals had called to each other.
"I'm so sorry," he said.
"It wasn't your fault," she said, leaning her forehead against his chest. The hot water spread over her head, warming her all over.
"I should have told you sooner. I wanted to, but I was a coward."
She didn't say anything, just enjoyed the feeling of his arms wrapped around her.
"Whatever you need in order to trust me, I'll give it to you. I'll chain myself to you, Erena."
Pulling back slightly, she said, "Hell no. I love you, but I don't want to be stuck to you every second. A girl needs some space."
He laughed and kissed her temple. "What do you think? Can we make this work?"
"It's already working," she whispered. "I know you better than anything or anyone. What happened really, really hurt, but I get it."
Pulling her in closer, he said, "I don't deserve you. You've given me so much. Your love. Your acceptance."
"You've taught me how to trust again," she said. "Even when you told me you'd been spying for Bronson, I trusted you then. I guess I never really stopped trusting you, which is the difference from my experiences with Jake. Even when my heart was broken, I believed you."
"You're so strong, Erena," he said, cupping her jaw in his large hand. "You're so strong and brave."
She nuzzled against his warm fingers and then nipped his thumb with her teeth.
His eyes widened in surprise, then narrowed. "What are you doing?"
She loved the dark undertone in his voice, the sensual currents in it. The water pounded around and over them, steam swirling. Their bodies were wet, slippery.
Batting her eyelashes, she said, "I've never had make-up sex before."
He grinned and said, "Let me take care of you."
He dropped to his knees in front of her. His dick was already hard, and she bit her lip when he gave it a quick stroke, his eyes on her. Taunting her. But then he leaned forward and pressed his mouth to her pussy, his tongue warm and wet like the water raining on them.
"Oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck," she said, helpless to the lust moving through her.
Matt tongued her folds, holding one of her hips with one hand and bringing the other to her pussy. He pressed one of his fingers inside of her and stroked in time with his licks. She felt herself tense up, her muscles coiling with pleasure.
"Relax," he whispered, kissing her inner thigh, still stroking within her. "Relax and let me show you how much I love you."
She looked down at him, at his blue-green eyes on hers. He stuck out the tip of his tongue and leaned forward again.
So good. He alternated licks along her folds, fluttering movements over her clit, and nibbling her with his lips. The whole time, he maintained a steady pace within her pussy, stroking with firm, strong movements. She leaned her head back against the side of the shower, letting the water run over her shoulders, breasts, and stomach, then down to her pussy, where Matt lapped it up.
The pleasure in her core built with every movement of his finger, every flick of his tongue, until she felt her walls clamping around him. She gripped the soap ledge for extra support as her orgasm ripped through her body, tearing her apart in ecstasy.
He kept his finger inside her, letting her ride it out, as he stood up and claimed her mouth in a kiss. She clung to his shoulders. She never wanted him to let her go, never wanted to lose him.
"I've got you, I've got you," he said, his voice a rumble, his lips speaking the truth. He had her and he always would.
"Now you," she said, reaching down to grip his cock.
He exhaled loudly. Slowly turning so her back was to him, Erena placed one of her feet on the edge of the tub and craned her neck to look behind her. "I want you inside of me."
He stepped forward, his hands going to her hips and caressing over the curves of her ass.
"Damn, you are so beautiful," he said, cupping her cheeks. "Takes my breath away."
Then he lined up his cock with her pussy and pressed inside, filling her. Her toes curled with the pleasure and she leaned forward, pressing her hands to the shower wall for balance. The fiberglass was warm, the shower so steamy it was hot, although her sweat was washing away as quickly as it appeared.
Matt leaned forward and thrust inside her, all the way in until she felt his thighs against hers.
"Perfect," he growled.
He was right—they fit together perfectly. He began to rock in and out of her and she moved with him on instinct, every motion enhancing their pleasure. Her need and desire grew, and when he brought his hands around to cup her breasts, she moaned.
His mouth was at her ear as he said, "I want you to come for me again, Erena, can you do that? I want to feel your sweet pussy coming on my cock."
She felt her cheeks redden at the sound of those deliciously filthy words, and pleasure spiked through her again. Matt's grunting filled the shower, along with the moans she was barely aware she'd been making. He tweaked her nipples, lightly pinching and pulling them, winding her up more and more.
"Touch your clit," he said. "Touch it however you like. Do it so you can come again."
Moving one hand off the shower wall, she did as he said. It felt so good—too good. "I'm—going to come—soon," she gasped.
"Good," he said.
His teeth found her shoulder—the same place where he'd marked her that first time they'd made love in the forest. Just the faintest touch of teeth to skin, reminding her of that perfect night when they'd known they would be inseparable, and—there. She came, crying out his name, and he was there with her a moment later, his cock pulsing inside of her, spilling his seed.
They rested there for a moment. Erena didn't feel like she could move ever again, and Matt seemed just as reluctant to separate. When he finally pulled out of her, he spun her around and held her in his arms.
"Thank you," he murmured. "Thank you for being the woman for me, for being my mate."
She kissed him, her heart full of peace and love. "Thank you for teaching me to trust and be happy again."