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Two years in the wild flew by and Saif was almost sorry to go back. But considering how fond of Karuna he was becoming, he decided it was better to resume the old routine. He looked forward to seeing Nimdja and Francisca again.
The sight of the Guild's building filled him with joy. He immediately went to Talwar's office, followed by Karuna who looked unnecessarily worried.
"I am proud to say his training was flawlessly concluded," he said. "I present to you Kilig the Sword, who is ready at your command."
Karuna straightened his back but relaxed, waiting for Talwar's response.
Talwar rose, shook Karuna's hand, then led them both out of his office. He gathered everybody in the canteen, since it was almost meal time, and Saif repeated the introduction. They all sat at the tables, waiting for food, and celebrated both the apprentice and his acharya. Saif noticed there was a new young man at the junior members' table.
"You earned the right to your own room," Talwar said with a grin. "You don't need to share with Saif anymore, sleeping on the floor."
Newly-named Kilig looked panicky for a moment.
"Of course you're free to live somewhere else," Nimdja added, amused.
"Can I share a room with a guild member?" Kilig asked, frowning.
"Of course, dear." Guisarme winked at him, her chin imperceptibly pointing at Nimdja and Francisca who sat side by side. Saif wondered where their daughter was – probably with Deepika. He hadn't heard any toddler in the building. He had some catching up to do with his childhood friends.
"Saif, will you resume active service or find a new apprentice?" Talwar asked.
Saif snapped back to reality. "I've been teaching for almost six years, Talwar, give me a break!"
Talwar nodded and chuckled. "Don't worry, Nimdja has already started training the latest young man who knocked at our door six months ago!"
Saif grinned at Nimdja who smiled back. He hoped to have a word with him in private, but as he got up from the table, Kilig asked him with a worried expression if they could talk. Saif guided him outside so he could smoke his pipe while they talked.
He had started using the pipe during Abhaya's training. It helped him relax, and dealing with Talwar's son had been very stressful. He still did it from time to time, less often than before, when he wanted to calm his thoughts.
The homecoming was giving him a lot to deal with that he wasn't expecting, including his feelings for Karuna. He was certain Kilig would be a great and just sword, but he'd miss the company and closeness with the handsome young man now seated by his side, frowning again as he gathered his thoughts.
"What is it, Kilig? Your dream is fulfilled, you're an assassin now. What bothers you?"
"I wanted to become an assassin to be with you," Kilig answered. "I was wondering if you'd mind sharing your room with me."
Saif took a pipeful before answering. Oh dear. Just what he'd been trying to avoid. He couldn't afford to get more intimate with the adoring young man.
"This is a lonely profession, Kilig. You will have to learn to work alone."
"And I will work alone if necessary," Kilig replied. "But like Nimdja and Francisca share the bed, I would like to sleep with you."
Saif looked at the pale oval face. He saw Kilig gulp, but the young man didn't avert his eyes.
Saif sighed and looked away. "You're eighteen, Kilig..." Much like he'd been when he was desperately in love with Talwar.
"So? I know what I want. I've known all along, but I realized it only when we came back. I want you. Will you let me sleep in your bed?"
Saif tried to hide a smile. "Maybe."
Kilig leaned towards him. "And what should I do to earn the honor?" he whispered, flashing an impish smile. "Do you want me on my knees, Acharya Saif?"
"You've got your assassin's name, stop calling me acharya!" Saif snapped.
Kilig chuckled and pulled away. "Well, don't act surprised when I come knocking on your door tonight."
***
"So, where is Sanjana?" Saif asked both Nimdja and Francisca as they ate dinner in the canteen.
"She lives with my sister," Francisca answered. "We don't want her to turn into another Abhaya."
"She knows her parents travel a lot, hence she lives with her aunt," Nimdja added. "We see her as much as we can, but soon I'll be off into the wild to train my apprentice... Will you keep an eye on her for me, Rohit?" He stared worried at his childhood friend.
Francisca elbowed him. "Hey, you didn't have her with a common woman who can't be told what your job description is!" she chided.
"You're right." Nimdja briefly kissed her lips, since he didn't express his love in public any more than Saif did. "But you know you can consider him like me, don't you?"
Francisca chuckled. "Except for the sex part, yes, you're as good as him." She looked at Saif. "Although apparently you've known women too."
Startled, Saif looked back at her. "What do you mean?" She knew as much as him where his preferences lay. Kilig's offer was very tempting, but he didn't feel comfortable with such a younger man. He felt he'd seduced an innocent who could be his son.
"I mean you had a son, Saif," Francisca said with a grin. "He definitely has your eyes!"
"It's impossible." Saif shrugged it off. "I never touched a woman in my life."
"And you should know, Lalima!" Nimdja teased. "Who knows who this woman slept with!"
Francisca glared at her partner and was about to object when Saif said, "I don't care about anyone's claims. I have more urgent worries right now."
"You're lucky you don't have to deal with fatherhood." Nimdja winked.
"I don't want to know!" Saif held his palms up to stop Francisca. "I have another problem to deal with right now. He isn't my son, but he's young enough to be so. He's twenty-three years younger than me, but I definitely don't have parental urges when it comes to him, and that's not what he wants either."
Nimdja raised his eyebrows. "Would that be Kilig the Sword?"
"Yes! He wants to share my bed! What am I supposed to do?" Saif glanced at the table where the younger members sat. Kilig was bickering with Guisarme, but it looked like a game for them.
Nimdja and Francisca also looked at the other table, then back at him.
"He's become a handsome young man," Francisca said, serious. "I understand you're tempted. Maybe it's time you retire and start a family."
Saif snorted. "I'm not a family man, Lalima! You might have felt a need for maternity and asked your best friend to impregnate you before it was too late, but I'm not like you – never was."
"I know, Rohit." She smiled fondly at him. "I had a crush on you when I joined the guild. It took me years to realize you weren't interested in me only because I didn't have a dick."
"And you couldn't corrupt me like you did with Aditya." Saif glared at Nimdja who smiled at him.
"How does he make you feel?" Nimdja asked.
Saif sighed, glancing at Kilig's smile again.
"He makes me feel alive," he whispered, lowering his eyes.
"Uh-oh." Nimdja looked at Francisca. "He's in love."
Saif stared at them, outraged. "I'm not..."
Of course he was. His rage deflated and his shoulders sagged. His best friends were right. Karuna's adoration had wrapped him in a charming net. He knew that when Kilig made his move, he wouldn't be able to resist.
Thus, to avoid any temptation, he decided to spend the night in the city. He badly needed some mindless sex to work Kilig out of his system.
He went back to the Guild's building when the sun was already up and he stopped to grab a pastry at his favorite bakery. He found Kilig brooding in the canteen and was glad he had spent the night out.
Refraining from caressing the handsome young man, he sat in front of him with a bright smile.
"Good morning, Kilig! Did you sleep well?"
"No," Kilig snapped, glaring at him.
"You'll have to get used to sleeping alone," Saif chided. "Anyway, I hope you're ready for your final exam."
"Of course I am," Kilig said proudly. "But don't think you'll get rid of me that easily afterward."
Saif chuckled and winked. "We'll see. Are you done?"
"Won't you have breakfast?"
"I had it before coming back here. Let's go, Kilig. Today you'll have to prove to me you're an accomplished assassin."
Kilig rose and followed him out of the canteen. He showed Saif his wrist where his noose was wrapped and a couple of hilts of daggers hidden in his clothes. He was dressed like a commoner heading for his daily chores, and Saif nodded his approval.
Both wore turbans when they left the guild's building, with a brass wheel over the fabric that looked like a decoration. Smaller brass wheels that could pass as bracelets were on their wrists. Dressing like an assassin wasn't something Saif enjoyed, but he had to test Kilig.
He chose the slums. There were no jobs at the moment, but the lower class could always use a free noose job on some bully who made their lives even more miserable than they already were. Saif guided Kilig to the place they had first met, and the young man didn't look happy at the choice.
"Why are we here?" he blurted out.
Saif turned to look at him. "Maybe your first assignment is to kill Karuna the Sorrowful."
"Karuna is already dead," he snapped. "I'm Kilig now!"
Saif smiled. "In that case, allow Kilig to tell his birth family what happened to Karuna. You were fifth of ten children. How many survived into adulthood?"
Kilig lowered his eyes. "Three," he whispered.
"That's only two people to visit and then we can move on," Saif said pleasantly. "Come."
Kilig reluctantly followed again. "I thought I'm not supposed to tell them I'm an assassin," he said before they reached the first mud-house they were heading for.
"And you shouldn't. Francisca's sister doesn't know what she does, but she knows Francisca isn't married, and that's why she's keeping Sanjana with her children. It's always good not to sever the bonds with your family, you never know when you might need them."
Deepika did know Lalima's profession, but she pretended not to. To her husband and friends she said her sister ran a risky business – which was true – hence Sanjana stayed with her. Saif's family had no idea of his new profession, but then he'd been estranged from them for years.
Kilig scoffed. "Or they might need me," he grumbled before knocking on his brother's door.
The two siblings immediately locked horns and Kilig seemed ready to punch his elder brother, so Saif dragged him away. The sister was much more affectionate and didn't question him. She seemed genuinely happy to see him and Kilig relaxed.
As they headed back towards the paved streets, screams caught their attention. In front of another mud-house a man was beating a woman, insulting her. Saif remembered Karuna's father doing the same to his children, but the scene was very familiar for Kilig too. Saif watched as Kilig marched on the couple.
The woman was crying and begging for mercy, and a couple of very small children ogled the scene from the house door. The man turned to them and raised his fist, ready to vent his anger at them as well, but Kilig grabbed his wrist and forced him to face him.
"What do you want?" the man snapped. "Stay out of this!"
"Never hurt a woman or a child," Kilig replied in a low, threatening voice, squeezing the man's wrist.
"Ha!" The other spat. "It's none of your business if my wife is a whore!"
"Then why marry her? It makes you feel powerful to beat her? Try it with me!"
"Stay out of this, boy..."
"I'm not a boy!"
Kilig's fist hit the man's face and bones cracked. Kilig shook his hand, regaining control. He looked at the woman who was hugging her children – a sobbing bunch of terrified creatures. The man had fallen to the ground, dazed.
"Would you like me to spare him or would you rather be a widow, free to remarry a better man or raise her children on her own?" he asked.
"Kill him before he kills us!" the woman begged through her sobs.
Kilig nodded. He took his dagger and knelt, putting his body between the fallen man and the children. The man grunted with anger, ready to hit back in spite of his bleeding nose, but Kilig slashed his throat open. The man collapsed – a quick, painless end for a man who deserved a much worse death.
"Thank you!" The widow grabbed his hand as he rose again and kissed it, wetting it with her tears. "Merciful stranger, may the gods bless you."
Kilig quickly bowed and retreated. He looked around, seemingly lost, and met Saif's eyes.
"Congratulations, you're a true assassin," Saif whispered, putting an arm around Kilig's shoulder and guiding him away from the slums. "Merciful Death. That's another name for us."
Kilig nodded, but he clearly had trouble putting his thoughts into words.
"Would you like to talk about it?" Saif asked as they walked back to the seat of the Guild.
"Yes. No." And then words started pouring out of his mouth, unstoppable. His buried sorrow, his sense of justice, excitement, fear, shame, all warred inside him.
They entered the Guild's building, still talking, and went upstairs to Saif's room. They sat on the double bed and Saif put his hands on Kilig's shoulders.
"Now take a deep breath and close your eyes."
Kilig obeyed.
"Release the air slowly. Relax."
But Kilig couldn't relax. He opened his eyes to look into Saif's.
"Are you feeling better?" Saif asked, worried. "This is a very strong experience and..."
Kilig threw his arms around Saif's neck and started kissing him hungrily. Saif gasped for breath, but there was no stopping Kilig's passion now. His resistance was futile. He should have known he couldn't stop himself from falling in love.