Sixteen

On the morning of Christmas Eve I stayed in the kitchen baking my gifts for my brothers while they were out doing their usual frantic last-minute shopping. I hadn’t been able to think of anything new to do for them, so I fell back on what I did every year. I also made some mini red velvet cupcakes to take to Kari’s party, which boosted my festive mood a little. I’d be able to give Jesse his gift tonight.

For Gray I baked a big batch of chocolate chip cookies, and put them in a basket with a football-shaped mug, some hot chocolate mix and a copy of Glass Houses by Rachel Caine. For Trick I broke with my tradition and made up a pan of old-fashioned gingerbread, a little jar of lemon glaze and some packets of decaf coffee stuffed in a Harley mug. I also gave him a copy of Carrie by Stephen King.

I knew the tone of my gifts would worry them, which gave me a certain amount of sour amusement. I didn’t think I could keep my secret much longer anyway, not now that Sheriff Yamah knew Jesse and I were together.

While I baked and basketed and gift-wrapped, I hummed “Deck the Halls” under my breath. I would have sung it if I’d known all the words to it, but humming worked nicely to keep my mind on task.

Using the impending holiday as a way to keep from thinking about Julian Hargraves and the missing girls felt pretty cowardly, but there was nothing I personally could do about it. Jesse had taken everything I’d found along with my list to the sheriff. He’d also been going out with Prince at night to search Julian’s property and check the basements of empty houses and every other place a vampire might use as a sanctuary.

“You are the one Julian has been hunting,” he had told me when I’d offered to go with him. “Until James and I find him, you are in danger.”

I hated being left out, but I knew he was right. I wanted to help find the girls, and stop Julian, but if we were right he might attack me the moment he saw me. Jesse could heal from almost any type of injury; I couldn’t.

I knew all that in my head, but my heart still argued with me. I’m the vampire hunter. What if I’m the only one who is able to find him? What if those girls die because I’m too afraid to try?

“I don’t even know how to try,” I told my whiny heart as I picked up my gift baskets and took them up to my room. Once I hid them in my closet, I took out the shoebox where I’d put Jesse’s gift.

I’d found an old map in one of the National Geographic magazines Trick had thrown in the recycle bin, and used that as the wrapping paper. I didn’t have any ribbon that matched, so I tied it with a piece of jute and tucked in the knot a twig of Florida holly from the bush that grew out near the fence between his land and ours.

I went out to the barn to check on Rika, and ended up saddling Sali and taking her for a ride. Frost had turned all of our pastures brown, and some of the trees had shed nearly all their leaves. I knew when spring came everything would green up again, but until then our land would remain bleak and depressing.

I needed to go somewhere else, somewhere I felt happy. “Let’s ride out to the lake cabin, girl.” I touched my heels to her sides.

Eager as always, Sali took off toward the front gate.

Following the path Jesse and I had ridden so many times by myself felt odd, but the sunlight streaming through the canopy of trees lit up the woods and brought out the colors I could never see as well at night. We passed a miniature maple, and the blazing red of its tiny leaves against a cluster of nobby-trunked, deep green pines made me smile. Even nature found a way to dress up for the holidays.

I dismounted as the trail narrowed and led Sali the rest of the way to the little lake. In the sunlight the cabin looked much older, but now I could see how strong the walls had been built, and even the remnants of a little stone path that led around the lake.

I tied Sali out front before I went inside. The light that came through the windows formed glowing, slanted columns that interlaced with each other over the split-log floor.

Jacob and his lady had lived all alone out here. I didn’t know how I knew that, only that it felt right. No family, no friends, and probably no children. Like me and Jesse, all they had needed was each other. I could sense the love that had dwelled in this place; I had from the first time we had come here.

I went to the hearth, and touched the heart carved into the mantle. “I’m afraid,” I whispered. “I don’t know if we can do what you did. Leave everyone behind to be together, just me and him. It’s one thing to say it, but to actually go, and never come back, never see them again … I don’t know if we’re that strong.”

I pressed my forehead against the mantle, and blinked back the tears. I wasn’t going to cry, not in this place. When my eyes cleared, the sunlight crept around me, causing the ashes in the hearth to glow like a little girl’s blush.

Ashes aren’t pink.

I knelt down and reached into the ashes, stirring them until I found a bit of burned cloth. Then I found part of a sleeve, and a melted piece of fake white fur, and some blackened metal buttons.

Someone had brought Sunny Johnson’s jacket here, to our cabin. Someone who had burned it.

I lifted the sleeve, blowing off the ash before I examined it. A dark splotch marred the fabric, and when I touched it the stain flaked off onto my finger, leaving behind a lighter spot on the fabric. It looked like an old blood stain.

Vampires can use blood to see the past. My parents and I can do the same in a more limited way. Since your father was like us, he must have passed on his ability to you.

I curled my fingers over the stain and closed my eyes, drawing on my anger and focusing it on the fabric in my hand as power surged inside me.

This time the vision came in a blur of movement and color that slowly coalesced into shapes: A teenage girl wearing a pink jacket. The streetlight that shone down on her dark hair. A pay phone. The purse through which the girl searched for something.

A voice echoed inside my head, scratchy but kind. Do you need some change for the phone, Miss?

I thought I had some. The girl sounded nervous.

Her fear pleased me, and made me feel stronger. My eyes fixed on the girl’s throat.

The old voice said, I can give you what you need, my dear. A gnarled hand offered some quarters.

The girl drew back. Thanks, but I think I’ll just walk down to the sheriff’s station and call my mom from there.

An ugly anger rose inside me. She wasn’t supposed to resist. Don’t you recognize me?

No, sir. She turned as if she meant to run off.

I couldn’t let her get away, not until I was sure.

Don’t do that. The old hand seized the girl’s arm, the long fingernails scraping over her forearm. Stop fighting me. You want to go with me. Don’t you?

The fear faded from the girl’s expression, and her voice went flat and dull. I want to go with you.

That’s good. The old hand pulled down the sleeve of the pink jacket, covering the scratches on the girl’s skin. We have so much to talk about, you and I. You must tell me how to complete the ritual.

I opened my eyes, dropping the fabric as I backed away from the hearth. I stumbled and almost fell as I wiped my hand off on my jeans, and then I had to run outside. Sali whickered to me, and I heard her shuffle as she watched me double over.

I threw up until my stomach was empty, and still it took another minute before I stopped heaving. Feeling the old man’s twisted emotions made me want to scrub out my brain with soap, but at least now I knew one thing for certain. Sunny Johnson hadn’t run away from home. She’d been taken, like the other two girls.

My head throbbed as I went back into the cabin. I felt too sick to attempt another blood vision, but I could try again later, when Jesse was with me.

I picked up the stained fabric and shoved it in my pocket before I searched the rest of the cabin. The vampire had left nothing else behind but a trace of the same musty, moldy scent I had detected in the library.

Julian hadn’t expected Sunny to resist him, and when she had he’d done something to her to make her stop. He’d told her what to do and she’d done it, as if she’d never felt afraid of him at all. As if he’d made her forget to be frightened … the same way my brother could make people forget things …

Realizing that Julian Hargraves and Trick shared the same ability made things seem very simple and clear. I couldn’t turn my back on Sunny Johnson or the other girls that greedy, selfish old man had taken. Not for another minute. No matter what it might cost me.

No one else was going to suffer in my place.

That evening Gray finally showed up, tired and cranky, to take me over to Kari’s party. He said Trick was still shopping, but he wouldn’t look me in the eye.

I accepted the lie in silence as we drove into town. My brothers and their endless schemes no longer interested me; I had more important things to deal with.

It seemed like everyone in Lost Lake had converged on the town, for people jammed the sidewalks. All of the merchants had kept their shops open late, and the local restaurants had set up little booths and carts everywhere to sell food. In the park I saw families spreading blankets and setting up chairs around the fountain, behind which a small stage had been set up. Kids chased each other around as they waved glow sticks and flash lights.

Gray made his way carefully through the crowded streets until we reached Tony’s Garage. Teenagers mobbed the place, and salsa music poured out from the open doors of the garage, which had been turned into a buffet and dance floor.

“Kari forgot to mention that it was a costume party,” I said as I watched a pirate whirl around a belly dancer. “I guess I’ll just have to be a high school girl.” I saw a flicker of yearning on my brother’s face, and said, “Why don’t you come with me?”

He watched Tiffany Beck and Aaron Boone, who had worn matching togas, walk in front of the truck, and his hand tightened on the steering wheel. “I don’t have time.”

“You can’t spare an hour to have some fun?” I asked.

Gray turned his head away. “I’ll be back to pick you up at eleven.”

“Fine.” I picked up the box of cupcakes and my purse and climbed out of the truck. As soon as I shut the door, Gray took off.

“Hey, Youngblood, over here,” I heard Kari call over the music.

I saw a Las Vegas showgirl standing in the door to the office, and only when I got close did I realize it was Kari. “Wow.” I took in her scanty, sequined outfit. “You look amazing.”

“You think so?” She patted the long curls of her blonde wig, from which peacock feathers sprouted. “I have a terrible urge to do high kicks and shimmy my upper parts.”

A monk wearing a hooded robe and a full face mask appeared beside her. “Don’t ask her to show you,” he said in Connor’s voice. “She’s beautiful and smart, but she dances like a bear on a trampoline.”

“Hey.” Kari elbowed him. “Watch it.” She took the box of cupcakes from me. “Oooh, red velvet. They’ll go great with the tacos. You’re my new best friend. Come on, I’ve got a costume for you.” She dragged me into the little lavatory in the corner.

A few minutes later we emerged, with me in a pair of too-big coveralls and one of Tony’s striped shirts. Kari had stuffed my hair up under a Tanglewood ball cap and fixed a black domino mask over my eyes.

“Why are we wearing costumes to a Christmas party again?” I asked as she led me out into the garage. I looked at the sign she pointed to draped across the parts shelves, which read “Halloween Do-Over.” “Oh.” I frowned at her. “Are you trying to start some trouble?”

“Always,” she assured me. “Also, just FYI, no one knows who my monk is, and I’d like to keep it that way.” She grabbed a short, skinny boy dressed up as Einstein. “Denny, meet Cat. Cat, this is my friend Denny, who is the best salsa dancer at Tanglewood High.”

“I am?” Denny squeaked.

“You are now.” She gave him a little push toward me.

I took his cold, clammy hand in mine. “It’s okay,” I told him. “I’m the worst salsa dancer at Tanglewood.”

“Really?” He regarded the packed dance floor, and then looked for Kari, who had disappeared. “Okay,” he said grimly, squeezing my hand like a soldier about to go into battle. “Let’s do this.”

Someone put on a fast beat, and Denny and I did our best to keep up with it and not laugh ourselves silly. When the next song started, he traded places with Aaron Boone, who handed off Tiffany to him.

“I’m not much of a dancer,” he told me in a loud voice as he took my hands. “My girlfriend just steers me around.”

“I can do that.” I tugged Aaron to one side to avoid a collision with another couple.

The last time Boone had danced with me, which he no longer remembered, he’d been an excellent dancer. Had my brother taken away his ability to dance along with his memories? What if he’d done the same thing to me? Was that why I didn’t know how to hunt vampires? Had he taken that away from me, too?

“I’m not that bad, am I?” Aaron asked me.

“No.” I made myself smile up at him. “But I am.”

I traded Aaron back to his very grateful girlfriend, but asked Denny if we could get something to drink. He led me over to a big metal bin filled with bottles and cans of soft drinks sitting in partially melted crushed ice, and after asking what I wanted fished around until he produced a bottle of peach tea.

As I took a sip, I saw a tall, slim figure appear on the other side of the dance floor. He wore riding clothes instead of a highwayman’s costume, and the mask Kari had given him was red instead of black, but for a moment time reversed itself, and I was back at the Halloween Dance.

“You okay, Cat?” Denny asked. He looked over at Jesse. “That your boyfriend?”

“Yeah.” Remembering my manners, I thanked him for dancing with me. I noticed a petite girl standing alone in one corner and looking wistful as she watched the other kids dancing, and pointed her out to Denny. “There’s someone who’d like to meet the best salsa dancer at Tanglewood.”

“Well, that’s me.” He grinned and headed toward the girl.

I started toward Jesse as he came to me, and we met in the middle of the crush of kids dancing. I took his hand and led him toward the back of the garage, where I found a more private spot behind the parts shelves.

“You look adorable,” he said.

“Kari’s idea.” I glanced down at my coveralls and gave him a wry look. “Want me to check your oil, sir?”

“Perhaps another time.” He plucked the hat off my head and drew my hair down around my shoulders. “That’s better.”

I needed to tell him about what I’d found at the cabin, and what I’d figured out about Julian having the ability to use mind-control, but I wanted this moment for us. I took out the map-wrapped package I’d slipped into the pocket of the coveralls and handed it to him. “Merry Christmas, Jesse.”

He smiled as he touched the sprig of holly. “You didn’t have to buy me a gift.”

“I didn’t buy it,” I said. “Go on, open it.”

Jesse untied the string and carefully unfolded the map to reveal the two books inside.

“They’re my journals,” I said. “Everything I’ve written since I got my memory back.”

He looked uncertain. “But these are your private thoughts. You should keep them.”

“They’re all about you.” I tried to smile. “I’ve been hiding them from my brothers since I got my memory back; they never thought to look in the barn. Whenever I felt frustrated, which was ten times a day, I wrote in them. There are some poems I wrote about you, too.”

“You wrote poetry for me?” He sounded awed.

“I wrote everything, Jesse. Everything I felt and thought and knew about you.” I didn’t want to tell him the rest, but I had to. “I never considered how dangerous that could be until we found Julian’s journals, and all the stuff he collected while spying on you. I didn’t mean to, but in a way I did the same thing he did.”

“No, Catlyn,” he said, and touched my cheek. “Julian didn’t care about anyone but himself. All you have done since we met is try to protect me.”

I swallowed hard. “Anyway, that’s why I decided to give them to you. If something ever happens to me, I don’t want my brothers or anyone else to find them and use them to hurt you.”

“I will keep them safe.” He took an envelope out of his pocket. “My gift for you seems suddenly inadequate.”

I frowned as I opened the envelope and took out the multi-page document inside. My name and Jesse’s had been typed in at the top, along with a lot of legal jargon and a state seal. “This looks official.”

“It is. It’s the deed for the lake cabin,” he said. “It’s in your name now.”

My jaw dropped. “You’re giving me the cabin?”

“The cabin, the lake, and the fifty acres surrounding it. I would give you everything I have,” he said, “but I think it would make the county tax collector suspicious.”

“I can’t believe you did this.” I laughed and hugged him. “You really want me to have the cabin?”

He kissed my forehead. “I think Jacob would be pleased to know it’s yours.”

“All right, who’s messing around back—oops, sorry.” Peacock feathers swayed as Kari turned around. “Um, when you guys are through having your private moment, can you come into the office? My monk and I have some info we need to pass along.”

“We’ll be right there,” I told her. When she left, I said to Jesse, “I was just out at the cabin today.” I told him about finding the remains of Sunny’s jacket, and how I’d used it to have another blood vision. “I’m almost positive Julian has the same ability that Trick does. I don’t know how that’s possible, but he’s making the girls forget to be afraid of him. That’s why Sunny went along with him willingly.”

“That is a Van Helsing ability.” He frowned. “He could not have acquired it from using my blood.”

“Maybe some of my blood got mixed up with yours in the boathouse.” Someone switched off the music, and I heard Kari calling me over a bunch of protesting voices. “Stay here.”

I walked out into the garage, and stopped as soon as I saw Trick standing in the center of the dance floor. My heart sank as I saw Sheriff Yamah beside him.

The party, it seemed, was over.