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It took her a while to calm herself down from her confrontation with Violet. Now she had a new thing to worry about. Was she starting to become her mother? It had never really been one of her fears, even after she’d had Ollie. The horror she’d been through as a teenager had been enough to convince her that she’d never turn out that way, but now Violet was putting ideas in her head. Could it be that she was going that way without even being conscious of it?
Another knock came at her door. It was still mid-morning, so she assumed it was the postman with something that wouldn’t fit through her letter box. She put down the book she was reading and got up from the sofa to answer the door.
“Stephen!” The last person she’d been expecting to see was her ex-husband. He struggled to show up on the days they’d arranged, never mind the ones they didn’t. “What are you doing here?”
“I heard you’d been suspended from work.”
Immediately, she bristled. “How do you know that?”
“I spoke to Violet.”
Fucking Violet.
“Well, you shouldn’t have.”
“I wouldn’t have needed to if you’d been honest with me about what was going on with Ollie at school,” he said, barging past her shoulder to enter the house. “She says you’re talking about home schooling.”
“It was just something that came up in conversation.”
“What’s wrong with you, Kristen? It’s like you’re not even stable anymore.”
She wanted to retaliate with, it’s hardly surprising when someone is breaking my belongings and slashing my tyres. But she kept her mouth shut. He’d have loved to have heard all of that. For all she knew, he was the one responsible for everything that was happening.
“I’m fine. I’ve just been standing up for our son, that’s all.”
“Daddy!” Ollie’s voice came from the other room, and a second later he flew out of the door to hug Stephen.
“Hey, big guy,” Stephen said, hugging him in return.
“Are you here to take me to your house?” Ollie asked.
It was an understandable train of thought, considering that was the only time Stephen was ever here.
“Nah, buddy,” Stephen said. “Not today. I’m just here to talk to your mum.”
“Everyone wants to talk to mum today,” Ollie observed.
She forced a smile. “Guess I’m popular. Now give your dad and me a moment to chat, okay?”
Ollie let out a sigh and rolled his eyes. “Grownup stuff again.” But he shuffled back into the lounge.
“Where’s the other one?” Stephen asked, his gaze flicking up the stairs.
“By other one, I assume you mean Haiden?”
“Yeah, that’s the one.”
“He’s in classes right now—not that it’s any of your business.”
Stephen gave a sigh, just like his son only moments earlier, and pushed his hand through his hair. “Look, Kristen, I was going to let this drop, but considering Ollie isn’t even happy at school and you’re not working there anymore...”
She lifted her hand to cut him off. “I’ve only been suspended, not fired. I have every intention of going back soon.”
“When they let you, you mean.”
Kristen scowled and folded her arms. “I know where you’re going with this, and no, Ollie is not coming to live with you during the week so he can go to Lyla’s school.”
“Why not? It seems like the sensible choice. If he’s not happy where he is, what’s the point in making him stay there?”
“Because I’m his mother, and he needs me.”
“Yeah, you’re doing a really great job of that so far.”
Rage surged up inside her. “How fucking dare you! You’ve been a part time father, at best. There’s one little hiccup, and you think you can come charging in here and scoop him up. You’re not taking my son away from me, do you hear me? I’ll die before I let you.”
He stared at her, shaking his head. “Jesus, Kristen. I always knew you were a little unstable when we were together, but this really takes the biscuit.”
“Stop saying that! I am not fucking unstable!”
But right now, she felt unhinged. She clenched her hands by her sides and ground her teeth, doing everything in her power to stop herself from lunging at Stephen beating his chest with her fists.
“I’m just trying to be practical, Kristen. You’re obviously a bit over-emotional right now, but give it some thought. Perhaps, when you’ve calmed down, you’ll see that what I’m suggesting makes sense.”
“I will never let Ollie come and live with you during the week, do you understand me? Now get out of my house before I do something I regret.”
Stephen shook his head, as though he was disappointed in her, and then leaned into the living room. “Bye, Ollie. I’ll see you at the weekend, okay?”
“Bye, Daddy,” the little voice filtered through.
Kristen bit back on a sudden desire to tell Stephen that he wouldn’t get to see Ollie this weekend, or any other weekend any time soon. Though the urge to be vicious and try to hurt lay within her, she knew she never wanted to be that kind of parent. It would be all too easy to use Ollie as a weapon, but the main person who’d get hurt was him. She loved her son too much to do that.
Stephen finally left, and she shut the door on him, and then pressed her back against it, shaking. She didn’t know how much more she could take today. Since when had she become everyone’s enemy?
Was this Stephen’s way of getting Ollie for good? Was he doing things to her home and car to try to make her look incapable of taking care of him? Her mind went to the letter from the solicitor. Had Stephen been advised to do these things to her in order to get custody of Ollie?
Whatever he was playing at, she had no intention of letting him win.
***
THAT EVENING, HAIDEN didn’t come home at his normal time.
As the minutes ticked past, she grew more and more anxious about why he was late. She checked her phone, making sure she hadn’t missed a call or message from him, and wondered if she should send him a message instead. There were no guidelines for this situation, and she didn’t want to look as though she was chasing him. Of course, it was just manners for him to let her know if he wasn’t coming home for dinner, but other than that, he was free to do whatever he wished. Just because they’d slept together didn’t mean they were in any kind of relationship. Maybe now that he’d shagged his landlady, he was on the hunt for someone younger, and had taken someone he’d met at the university out, instead. God, if he paraded some perky eighteen-year-old around, she thought she might die.
Her heart was heavy, and her insides churned like she’d eaten something that hadn’t agreed with her. She wished she could take back them having sex, but that was impossible.
The front door clicked open, and she froze. Would he go straight upstairs, or come looking for her? Would he even mention what they’d done, or perhaps it would be better if they both acted like it had never happened? He’d said he hadn’t wanted for her to say them having sex had been a mistake, but he’d been high on the moment and endorphins when he’d said that. Things always looked different in the cold light of day.
The kitchen door opened, and she forced a smile. Haiden looked exactly like he always did—handsome and relaxed. She’d probably spent the day agonising over everything, while he’d barely given what they’d done a second thought.
“Hey,” he said. “Sorry I’m late. I had something I needed to take care of.”
“That’s okay. No problem.”
He crossed the room and came up behind her. To her surprise, he wrapped his arms around her waist and nuzzled her neck. “I haven’t stopped thinking about last night all day.”
Her stomach flipped, her breath catching. “You haven’t?”
He spun her in his arms, so she was facing him.
“Of course not.” He must have sensed her hesitation as he leaned back to see into her face. “You’re not having regrets, are you?”
She shook her head. “Not regrets, no, but I’m not sure it can happen again.”
Oh, but how she wanted it to. Just being in such proximity to him made her feel like she was alive again, like she could forget all the other shit that was being thrown at her.
“We’re both adults, Kristen. I know it’s not a usual setup, but neither of us are doing anything wrong.”
“The university...” she started, but even she could hear that her heart wasn’t in her protests.
“There’s no reason for them to find out. In fact, I’m not even sure about the course I’m doing there anymore. It isn’t what I was expecting.”
“It isn’t?”
“No, I’m not really enjoying it.”
“But if you leave, you won’t be covered by the university housing anymore.”
“Exactly.”
Her mind was spinning. “So, you’d have to move out?”
“Or you just stop being a host for them.”
This was all getting a bit much. “We’ve only known each other a few weeks, Haiden. I’m not sure I can rush into big decisions like this. I’ve got a lot on my plate right now, what with everything happening at school, and then Stephen, Ollie’s father, stopped by earlier and threatened to make things difficult for me. He’d use any excuse to make me look like a bad mother, and he’d somehow twist around how I’m sleeping with a student, even if you are a mature one.”
Haiden’s expression darkened, his eyes growing hard. “Stephen’s been hassling you? He was around here?”
“Yes, but I dealt with it. As I’m sure you’re aware, I’m an adult.”
“Yes, you are,” he agreed, “which is why you shouldn’t let people push you around.”
He swept the hair away from her neck and placed a kiss at the point where her neck met her shoulder, sending shivers of pleasure through her.
She knew she shouldn’t let people push her around, but it seemed like Haiden had a whole other way of getting what he wanted.