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“So you want to know where your colleague ‘Phyllis’ is,” the Lord Mayor said.
“Yes, please,” Mordred replied. They sat alone upstairs in Mansion House, surrounded by chairs, and facing each other across a long table. The three former Mayors in the portraits regarded them like the ghosts of Christmas past, present and future, but without any festive or optimistic associations. They looked like they spent most Christmases slashing Wat Tyler to death.
“Let’s say, for the sake of argument, I knew where this woman was,” Cavendish said.
“Go on.”
“And I also knew where Fenella Decristoforo-Salvaterra was.”
This was a bit like being with Hannah. The surprises. “Keep going.”
“You don’t sound very taken aback,” the Lord Mayor said. “Good acting. You probably need a skill like that in your job.”
“So you’ve got Phyllis Robinson and you’ve got Fenella Decristoforo- Salvaterra. What are you going to do with them?”
“I’m not saying I’ve ‘got’ them.”
“What are you saying?”
“I’m saying for the sake of argument, for God’s sake. I thought I’d made that clear at the beginning. Don’t try and trap me. It won’t work.”
“If, for the sake of argument, you were holding Phyllis and Fenella, then what, for the sake of argument, would you do with them?”
“For the sake of argument, I – we: we in the City of London – would hold on to Phyllis, while you rendezvous with Fenella Decristoforo-Salvaterra and persuade her to lead you to her father. Once you’ve done that, we would release Phyllis. For the - ”
“But you’d kill Peter.”
“In the last resort, maybe. But his internet-cloaking discovery probably has important commercial applications. We’d want to access that first. Better than it falling into the hands of terrorists, you must agree. To that end, we’d need to hold on to his daughter.”
“I see, yes.”
“I accept that, for the sake of argument, all this would be asking a lot of you, but you’d be the head of Horvath and obviously two hundred and fifty thousand pounds is a lot of money. You’d have to be prepared to go beyond the call of duty all the time.”
“Yes, I appreciate that.”
“The people at Horvath warned me about your conscience, by the way. ‘He’s pretty self-righteous’, they said. They - ”
“What? The people at Horvath said that about me?”
“Does it surprise you?”
“I thought they liked me.”
“For the purposes of this discussion, they like you a lot. After all, you’re going to head their organisation.”
“Who specifically in Horvath said that about me?”
“I’m not at liberty to say. Does it matter?”
“Was it Tarquin?”
“Tarquin who?” The Lord Mayor frowned. “Wha - ? Horvath doesn’t even have a ‘Tarquin’.”
Mordred nodded. “I see, yes. He’s going by another name nowadays.”
“Who is?”
“Sorry, I shouldn’t have said anything. Forget it.”
“I - ”
“I’ll deal with it on my first day in the job.”
“Look, Mr Mordred, I’d like you to leave now. We both need time to think about this. I need to consult with what I hope will be your future colleagues; you need to consult your precious ‘conscience’. In the meantime, tell yourself this: a developed sense of empathy, of justice and injustice, makes a person weak. It stops him or her getting on. Luckily, however, it’s not indestructible. It can be overcome. I was once a ‘good’ man like yourself. I trained myself not to mind hurting others. Not to go out of my way to hurt people, of course. I’m no sadist. But life is essentially about trampling. Having it done to you, or doing it to others. In the end therefore, conscience is just an illness, like a bad dose of the flu. And like most such ailments, you can get rid of it. The difficulty lies in taking the first steps, because they’re always the most painful.” He stood up. “Good luck, Mr Mordred. There’s a car downstairs waiting to take you back to Thames House. Say nothing about this to anyone, otherwise, I’ll know. I’m the Lord Mayor of London. Like MI7, I have spies everywhere.”
“Before I leave, I’d like to know how Phyllis is.”
The Lord Mayor looked at him a moment then smiled. “You keep asking about her. Am I to assume there’s something more between you than mere work relations?”
“In a word, yes.”
“Just one word? Fine, play your cards close to your chest. I’ve always found that particular strategy works for me. Don’t worry about her. She’s not underground in a dungeon or anything like that. Quite the opposite. She’s being very well looked after. Apart from the obvious restrictions on her movements consistent with her being a prisoner, I would imagine she’s having a whale of a time. I wouldn’t have it any other way. Contrary to popular opinion, not all financiers are ogres.”
“At least, not for the sake of argument.”
“Of course. Everything’s hypothetical.”
“Is she still in London? Just for the etcetera?”
“That would be foolish of whoever might be holding on to her. No, her gaolers have probably moved her out to the shires. The attic of a country house somewhere, maybe.”
“So long as she’s okay. I’m hoping to be able to persuade her to come and work at Horvath. Assuming you haven’t been unkind to her, I think I may be in with a chance.”
“You’re a sensible man, Mr Mordred. It took me a long time to realise that you can always attract an attractive woman when you’re as well off and well connected as I am, and you’re perhaps going to be. Having said that, intelligent attractive women are different. Even with all my wealth and power, I still find attracting such women nigh on impossible. You’d do well to hold on to this one.”
“I’ll do my best.”
“That is, if I don’t beat you to her. As I say, her confinement isn’t exactly onerous, and I’m very good at playing the charming host.”
“I’d better watch out, I guess.”
The smile fell from his face. “I’m joking, John. I’m too old for that. I’m only interested in money nowadays. Good luck with her.”
“Thank you.”
“Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’ve work to be doing. As I say, your car’s downstairs. We’ve got twenty-four hours. One day for you to decide whether you want to work for us, and ... for us to make an equivalent decision about you.”
“What happens if one or the other of us decides to say no?”
“Let me just say that since I don’t actually know where ‘Phyllis’ is, I can hardly be held responsible for her safety. I hope nothing happens to her, but that’s all I can do: hope. Have you tried calling the police, by the way?”
Mordred smiled. “I’ll see you tomorrow, sir.”
The same car and driver that had brought him to Mansion House returned him to his point of origin. On the way, he rang his mother. He apologised for cutting her off.
“And I’m sorry for shouting at you earlier,” she said. “Obviously, it wasn’t your fault. I just needed someone to vent my frustration on, and you’re always so forgiving. I’m becoming a real bag.”
“I spoke to Hannah,” he said. “She may have given you the impression that I can meet you in Saint Helier. I’m not sure I can. With work.”
“Oh, be there if you’re there, John. We’ll miss you if you’re not, but we’ll understand. Your father and I aren’t old, you know. We’re perfectly capable of looking after ourselves.”
“I know.”
“Just a piece of advice, though, honey. If you’re at work and you can’t talk, for goodness sake, switch your mobile off. There should be a red button on there somewhere. Just press it when you’re not available, and press it again when you are.”
“Yes, you’re right. Thank you.”
They said love you and hung up. Now for the main event. He called Hannah. Somehow, even in the monosyllable with which she answered, he could tell she was excited. In a positive way.
“Is Soraya around?” he asked.
“I’ll pass you over,” she replied. “The castle thing’s completely sorted, by the way. Piece of cake. My God, isn’t it amazing, John? We’re all in tears over here! – Here, it’s John. He just wants to say congratulations!”
Soraya: “Hi, Jim! Hey, guess what? I know your real name!”
“Er ... congratulations?” Mordred said.
“I love you!” she shouted. “I bloody love you! I BLOODY LOVE THE BLOODY WORLD!”
“Okay, well ... that’s good.”
Hannah again. “Isn’t it AMAZING?”
“Listen, I’ve got a question for Soraya.”
“What is it? Hang on. I think I know! Is it: ‘why are you so wonderful, so utterly AMAZING?”
“No, it’s: ‘can you remember the name of the boat on which you met Fenella?’”
“What? It’s a bad line! You’ll have to speak up!”
“Look, what going on? What’s happened that’s so fantastic?”
“Haven’t you heard? – Listen everyone: John just said congratulations to Soraya and he doesn’t even know what’s happened!”
Raucous laughter. Soraya again: “I love you, man!”
“Hi again, Soraya. Do you remember the - ”
“Listen, John.” Hannah again, doing her level-best to sound restrained. “‘Name Me Your Stone Cold Name’ has just reached number one in the Billboard Top 100. It’s the number one track in the United States and the UK at the same time! We’ve finally done it! We’ve finally made it in America! Five years this has taken! Listen!”
She treated him to two seconds of Fully Magic Coal Tar Lounge drunkenly singing The Star Spangled Banner.
“Congratulations. Really great news.”
“And before you ask, no I’m not drinking. Everyone else is. We’re family. Soraya’s going to be my God-mum, remember? I’m high on life!”
“I love you!” Soraya shouted in the background.
“Is there anyone else I can speak to? Anyone a bit more ... grounded?”
“Listen, I’m putting Tim on. Tim and Jim, speak to each other. Whoo-hoo!”
“Hi, Tim.”
“Hi, John.”
“Are any of the Coal Tars vaguely sober? I need to ask a question about a boat they were aboard.”
“Gaz is a teetotaller. Do you want me to put him on?”
“Hi, John,” a bass voice said. “Welcome to Gaz. What can I be doing for you, this fine day?”
“Can you remember the name of the boat on which you met Fenella?”
“Who?”
“Out in the channel. She wore a black dress. About Soraya’s age. ‘Very posh, in a Spanish way’.”
“Oh, her. Yeah, I remember. It was called Saint Martha’s Pride.”
Bingo. “Thank you. And congratulations on the number one.”
Gaz laughed. “Vanity, vanity, saith the Preacher. All is vanity.”
Afterwards, he put an urgent call through to Ruby Parker requesting that she recall all agents in the vicinity immediately.
Thirty minutes later, he sat at the head of a long table very much like the one in Mansion House, in a room that looked much shabbier than its counterpart. Ruby Parker sat to his immediate left. Karen, the minute-taker, to his right. Further down the table: Alec, Ian and Gwyn, and about twenty other faces he only half-recognised from seeing them in corridors.
He gave a blow-by-blow account of his meeting with the Mayor before proceeding to more general observations and conclusions.
“I asked him whether Phyllis was in London. He said no. ‘For the sake of argument’, her captors had ‘probably’ moved her to the shires. There was no necessity for him to give that sort of information away. He could just as easily have said he didn’t know. I’m pretty sure he was lying. He wanted to make sure I’d be thrown off-track. And of course, his body-language also said liar. Long blink, look to the right, touched his nose. I’m pretty sure she’s somewhere within the Square Mile.”
“The trouble is,” Ruby Parker said, “that’s a lot of office-space occupied by a lot of very powerful people, and, being the City of London, it’s technically out of our jurisdiction. I accept we’re spies, but getting people into those places is a long-term project. We probably don’t have the luxury of time.”
Alec put his hand up and smiled. “I predict that John’s about to divulge a plan.”
“I very much hope someone is,” Ruby Parker said.
“It’s partly why I called everyone back to Thames House,” Mordred said. “In twenty-four” – he looked at his watch – “twenty-three hours, I’ve an appointment with the Lord Mayor of London to talk about a job offer. Within that time, I want us to have found both Phyllis and Fenella, but more importantly, I want to make ensure that’s the end of it: no more abductions, no more trying to get their hands on whatever it is Peter Decristoforo knows, that’s it. The City’s complete withdrawal from any claim to an interest. And I’m going to force the Mayor to agree to that at our meeting.”
“I take it this is the greatest plan the world’s ever seen,” Alec said.
Mordred went on. “What we need is a list of all the office-cleaning suppliers within a twenty-mile radius. Then we need to find out which have customers within the Square Mile. Finally, we ring up claiming to be a big City firm looking to employ a cleaning company on a lucrative contract. Ideally, we want to hire one that’s already familiar with the Square Mile, and so appreciates its high standards. In other words, do you already do business with other firms within the Square Mile?”
“Negotiating a contract sounds like the sort of decision only the boss could make,” Alec said. “Most bosses won’t be available on a cold call.”
“Depends how much money’s at stake,” Edna said. Mordred hadn’t seen her come in; nor Annabel and Tariq. They were sitting at the end of the table.
“You can nearly always find someone in authority if there’s enough at stake,” Ruby Parker said.
Mordred continued: “Once we’ve discovered who does do business within the Square Mile, we arrange for them to be visited by a representative from Her Majesty’s Revenue and Customs – which is to say, we pay them that visit. Officially, we’re investigating money laundering in the City. We need to look at precisely the areas each firm is responsible for within that area: what buildings, what floors, what rooms.”
“I’m sure we all see where you’re going with this,” Ruby Parker said.
“We’re only investigating two point nine square kilometres,” Mordred said. “It shouldn’t take long. If we do it properly, we’ll end up with an exhaustive map of which parts of the City are in regular use. The remainder – the parts where no cleaner ever goes – is where Phyllis will be. Since office-space in that part of London’s at a premium, we should find ourselves with two, three, maybe four locations.”
Everyone turned to each other and made approving noises. It was a great plan, really great. The best they’d heard for donkeys’ years. Then he overheard someone tell her neighbour, ‘His sister’s the manager of Fully Magic Coal Tar Lounge’. Her neighbour nodded and made approving noises.
Alec had his hand up. “It’s a good proposal,” he said, “but it can be improved.”
“Go on,” Ruby Parker said.
“We can save ourselves the initial cold calling,” he went on. “Thames House must employ a cleaning company in at least some areas of the building. Assuming that company’s like any other, it must be looking to break into its competitors’ markets all the time. We need to get hold of it and ask what it knows about its rivals’ territories.”
“We should probably ask that question generally,” Mordred said. “To everyone we visit.”
“We’re assuming she’s in some office building somewhere,” Annabel said. “What if we’re wrong? What if she’s in a private residence?”
“It seems unlikely,” Mordred said. “They must have taken into account the slim possibility – from their point of view – that we’d find her. If we locate her at a private address, the culprit’s automatically identifiable. No one’s going to risk that. With a commercial building, there’s always inbuilt deniability. And don’t forget: everyone in the City has a stake in this. Given that the Lord Mayor’s involved, the strong likelihood is that they’re working as a cabal, each prepared to cover for the others.”
“All for one and one for all,” Alec said. “You’re making a lot of sense today, John, I’ll give you that.”
“If we really go all out, we could put together a comprehensive map within twelve hours,” Ruby Parker said. “I take it we then infiltrate the cleaning staff and access the uncharted areas. That shouldn’t be too difficult.”
“See how well she’s being looked after,” Mordred said. “Assuming she’s not actually being mistreated, we rescue her just before I go and see the Lord Mayor and I take her with me. Which brings me to the separate problem of Fenella Decristoforo-Salvaterra.”
“Mightn’t they be two puzzles solvable by a single method?” Alec asked. “If they think derelict office-space is a good place to hide Phyllis, wouldn’t they hide Fenella there too? Why re-invent the wheel?”
“Because,” Mordred replied, “as I’ve already said, they must have taken into account the possibility that we’d find her. If so, it seems unlikely they’d put all their eggs in the same basket.”
“Okay,” a twentysomething man at the front with a newly sharpened pencil said, “then how do we know it’s not Fenella who’s in the empty office-space, and Phyllis who’s elsewhere?”
“Because I think I know where Fenella is,” Mordred replied.
“You seem to know everything,” the man with the pencil said sardonically.
“How’s the spy novel coming along?” Mordred asked him.
He blushed. “I didn’t – how did you - ?”
“Fenella arrived in this country in a boat called ‘Saint Martha’s Pride’,” Mordred went on. “She had two servants with her. Since neither of them has yet been to the police, my guess is that they’re being held hostage with her. And the best place for anyone to do that would be aboard the boat itself. We need to contact the British Ports Association in the first instance. But my strong suspicion in that they’ll attempt to keep her close. That means Canary Wharf, Greenland, Poplar, Limehouse Basin, Saint Katharine Dock. Unless anyone objects, Alec and I will take the latter. We’ll need to conduct all searches in disguise, because it could be Horvath that’s holding her, and its personnel may recognise some of us on sight.”
With the exception of the man with the pencil, everyone turned to each other and remarked on his perspicacity. He was an utter genius, that much was plain, what conundrum couldn’t he solve when he put his mind to it? Then he overheard someone tell the man beside him that he once went out on a date with Soraya Snow. The addressee drew his chin back and made an incredulous noise.
“I need one more thing to make this plan work,” Mordred said. “I need someone in this room who can do a passable imitation of my voice.”
Everyone looked at each other.
“Your voice?” Alec said. “You mean you? John Mordred?”
“My voice. Is there anyone here around this table who’s ever attempted to imitate me?”
Sheepishly, one by one, everyone except Ian, Edna and Ruby Parker put their hands up. Total silence.
Mordred realised he was blushing. “Well, that’s enough to be going on with,” he said.
Ruby Parker asked him if he had any more to add, then closed the meeting, stood up and began to assign responsibilities.
