He could tell Kaitlyn was biting her lip, biting back laughter. “What did you just say?”
“Um, I heard that in a movie once,” he backpedaled. “Maybe that one where a bell rings every time an angel gets their wings.”
She scanned his face carefully, trying to figure him out. “You’re insane.” Her phone rang just then, and it was his sister Sara congratulating her on finding the recipe. Apparently Hazel had told Rachel who’d seen Gabby at the grocery store who’d called Sara…the joys of small-town living.
Rafe took that opportunity to tuck the dog into his crate and escape. As he stood in the darkened hallway, he could see her laughing on the phone and talking animatedly.
She was everything he’d been waiting for. She was his Christmas miracle. She’d opened his heart again in a way he would never have thought possible.
But he couldn’t say any of that. He was afraid to say it, because what if it jinxed everything? So he decided if he couldn’t tell her, he would just have to show her.
As soon as Kaitlyn finished her call, Rafe walked back into the laundry room. She was standing next to the dryer reading the recipe again on her phone for the hundredth time. “I bet your neck is sore, looking through that recipe box for hours like that.”
“Well, now that you mention it,” she said, flexing her neck and rubbing her hand alongside of it, “it is a little sore.”
He took her phone out of her hand and set it on the dryer. “I could take a look, if you want. I give a mean neck massage.”
“Oh, okay,” she said, using her now-free hands to wrap around his waist. He moved the hood of her reindeer robe aside and rubbed with his hands along the base of her neck.
He gave a little tug on the robe until it loosened up a little more. “How’s this feel?” he asked, making his way along her clavicle. “Good?”
“My back needs it too,” she said, gesturing over her shoulder.
As he massaged between her shoulder blades, her hands meandered to the drawstring on his scrubs, untying it, tucking her hands inside.
“I give pretty good massages too,” she said, kneading his butt.
“I—I like that,” he said, smiling. “A lot.”
She looked up at him, and a feeling he could only name as fierce overcame him. It tightened his chest, constricted his throat, and made him kiss her passionately, swooping her up to him so quickly a laugh and a whoops escaped her lips.
Behind her, the puppy stirred.
She put a hand over her mouth. “I didn’t mean to be loud,” she said.
“If that’s loud, I really don’t think that’s a problem.” He smiled and bent his head to kiss her again.
She turned her head again toward the puppy. “I don’t think we should be doing this here,” she said.
Rafe turned to check out the dog in the crate, still fast asleep. “You mean in front of the dog?”
“Yeah. He’s a baby. He might wake up and be…confused.”
“I have a solution for that.” Rafe flipped off the light switch. Then he scooped her up and carried her down the hall to the bedroom.
* * *
They were in bed talking and laughing when suddenly, from down the hall, they heard yips and barks. “Oh no,” Rafe said, sitting up.
Lying beside him, Kaitlyn ran her hand slowly up and down his back. “Well, you’ve gone and done it,” she said, her voice a little shaky. “Awakened our poor nameless puppy.”
“You are so noisy,” he said, giving her a mischievous look as he climbed out of bed.
“You are so the baby of the family,” she said, smacking him playfully on the butt. “Such a troublemaker.”
“Okay. It was my fault. Next time don’t be so…”
“So what?”
So…everything he ever wanted? He’d barely touched her, and yet he could hardly control himself around her. Houston, he had a problem. He smoothed her hair back from her face. “So driving me wild with everything you do.”
“I didn’t do anything, remember? I just relaxed and let you do all the work.”
“That’s the kind of work I want to do every day,” he said, tugging on his scrub pants.
He took one more look at her, beautiful and spent, kissed her on the forehead, and ran out of the room, returning a minute later with the puppy, which he deposited on the bed. Certain it was playtime, the puppy hopped around the comforter, rolling and jumping and attacking the corner of the comforter and tugging it with his teeth.
“The books say not to let the dog up on the bed,” she said matter-of-factly.
“Oh, sorry,” Rafe said. “I didn’t even think about that. Our dog used to sleep in my bed,” he said.
“Well then, we’re going to need a bigger bed, because this dog is going to weigh as much as me, and I need a lot of room.”
The ball of fur scrambled over to Kaitlyn and suddenly tumbled, landing with feet suspended in the air. She giggled and rubbed his stomach.
“That dog is in love with you already,” he said. He got it, he totally did.
“I love him too,” she said. She glanced up and blushed. “Can’t help myself.”
Just then the puppy sprang off the bed and ran over to a laundry basket in the corner of the room where he proceeded to tug on a sock that was hanging over the edge.
Kaitlyn ran over to grab the sock, but the dog, sensing a game, ran just out of her reach.
“Hey, not another sock,” Rafe said. He nearly grabbed it, but the dog tore out of the bedroom and off down the hall.
“Come here, you little bandit,” Rafe said. Suddenly he halted midrun. For a heartbeat, he and Kaitlyn stared at one another.
“Bandit,” Kaitlyn whispered, her eyes wide.
“Stealer of socks,” Rafe said. He laughed, shook his head, then took off after the dog.
When he got the puppy settled again, Rafe climbed back into bed. Kaitlyn lay down next to him, her hand drifting to his chest.
He put his hand over hers.
“Are you okay?” she asked a minute later, when he was almost asleep.
He glanced over at her. “More than okay,” he said. “You?”
She flashed him a grin and nodded, then rested her head on his chest.
As Rafe put an arm around her and held her close, he felt shaky all over, tenderness flooding over him in waves that he could not control. A tide of feeling was engulfing him, towing him under, pulling him out to sea, and he let go, rolling with the amazing flow.
* * *
In the middle of the night, Rafe awakened to find Kaitlyn gone from the bed. He raked his hand over her empty spot, still warm from her body. His eyes fluttered open, and dimly, he became aware that the bathroom light was on. He heard the sound of more light switches flipping, of drawers being opened and shut. He got out of bed, an acid feeling in the pit of his stomach already signaling to him that something was amiss.
He found her in the living room, lifting up the cushions, scattering them everywhere as she searched for something.
“What are you looking for?” he asked.
“I need my phone,” she said, her voice cracking.
“I’ll help you look for it.” She was icy pale, and her hands were shaking.
He touched her arm. “What is it? What’s wrong? Are you okay?” But he knew deep inside something wasn’t right. He saw the panic etched on her face.
She stifled a sob. “I’m bleeding. I—have to call the doctor.”
Bleeding?
No.
He ran to the kitchen island and handed her his cell phone, his own hand visibly shaking.
“Let me help you.”
“It—it’s okay,” she said, already tapping her phone. “I can do it.”
She hit the contact number she needed and spoke to the answering service. “Hi. I’m Kaitlyn Barnes, and I’m a patient—I’m pregnant, and I just noticed some— I’m bleeding. No, not a lot, but more than—more than spots. No, no cramping. Yes. Yes, I can. I’ll be right there.” She hung up the phone. “They told me to go down to the ER. They’re going to do an ultrasound to see if…to see if…” As her voice trailed off, Rafe realized he was just standing there, paralyzed, terrified out of his mind.
He dealt with medical emergencies every day, but it was as if his entire encyclopedia of knowledge left him and he could not think. Could something be really wrong? Could she be about to lose the baby? Yes. Could it be something else, something not awful? Yes, that was possible too, but his mind was fixated on everything terrible.
He mentally shook himself into action and wrapped his arms around her. He forced himself to be calm, but for the life of him, he couldn’t think of the right words to say. Afraid to reassure, afraid to imagine the worst, he settled on, “One step at a time. Can I help you find clothes?”
She was crying, tears streaking down her face. “Yes, please,” she said, surprisingly calm. He followed her into the spare bedroom. “I just need some yoga pants and a sweater,” she said. “Any kind of decent clothes.”
He made her sit down while he rummaged through her clothes, at a loss, but he did find the yoga pants. And a bunch of underwear, but he just turned the whole bag over to her rather than go through that.
“You don’t have to come,” she said. He stopped everything, the words making him wince. She looked at him through tear-streaked eyes. “Rafe,” she said, her hand clutching his wrist. Her voice was gravelly and practically a whisper. “I—didn’t mean that. I’m scared to death. If things are—bad, I’m not sure I can keep it together by myself.”
“Of course I’m coming with you,” he growled. “I want to be with you.” It was all he could say for now.
Five minutes later they were out the door.