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Kelsey
Another day off and Kelsey needed it. Between the two new patients she had and running interference for the dirt biker's room, exhaustion stole her claim to sanity. All of her motivation to do anything worthwhile slipped out the door.
Before leaving for the night, she ducked in to check on Josiah. If for no other reason than to be around him, but actually, she wanted to make sure he was doing okay. Gently pushing open the door with a soft knock, Kelsey cocked her head to the side and paused in the doorway. She stared in disbelief as JT wobbled on one foot on the side of his bed. His head angled back and he had his eyes squeezed shut.
“What are you doing? I don’t think you were cleared to leave the bed yet, were you?” She closed the door behind her and folded her arms with an eyebrow quirked.
Startled, JT moved to pull his hospital gown tighter around his backside and he teetered more precariously on the one leg. He must have been tired and probably dizzy. Kelsey rushed to his side and grabbed his uninjured arm to steady him. “Shh. I got you.”
His warm hand closed around hers and he clung to her.
“I’m sorry. I... I didn’t think I’d get so dizzy. I almost passed out.” He shook his head, his sprained wrist hanging limply at his side. “I’m really not this weak.”
Kelsey met his gaze and nodded slightly. “Of course, not. I’m going to pivot you this way to help you sit down.” She helped him turn on his planted foot and lowered him to the bed. She checked his IV connection and unhooked the wires he’d twisted up before reconnecting them. “Do you need something?” She glanced around his room to see what he would be going for.
Multiple balloon bouquets and vases overflowing with flowers that were wrapped in ribbons all had one color in common – red. Reds of all hues and tones. Pinks and whites were mixed in, but sparingly.
“It looks like Valentine’s Day threw up in here.” Kelsey wrinkled her nose. “Red is not a good color.”
JT glanced at her sharply and then rubbed his shoulder. “Honda’s are red.”
“Okay?” Kelsey reached across him and tied the top strings of his gown. Good for Hondas. She wasn’t sure why that mattered but apparently red was important.
“I ride Honda.” His tone turned despondent as if he were lonely and no one understood him.
“Oh.” Kelsey stopped with the busy work and let her hands fall to her side. She’d stopped worrying about him and it showed in her care. She was so worried about getting attached to a racer that she’d avoided seeing him as a patient in need.
She looked around the overflowing room. “You have a lot of friends.” Kelsey lifted her hand to point at the flowers, balloons, and stuffed animals manning every spare space and then some. “A lot of patients never even get visitors when they’re here.” Let alone so many flowers and gifts that they fall off the counters.
“Take them. Take all of them and give them away, okay? They aren’t friends. They’re fans. There’s a difference.” He didn’t look up or even meet her gaze.
“What’s wrong? You don’t normally have a problem looking at me.” Kelsey wasn’t one to hide behind shyness. She was his nurse. She could fix it. “Are you in pain again? Do you need to use the bathroom? Seriously, what can I do to help you?”
He snorted. “Yeah, that’s just it. I’m not used to needing help. You can’t see me as a man because you’re busy helping me to the bathroom.” He tugged at the gown. “I’m in a dress for hell’s sake.” Blushing, he shook his head, the hair brushing the bow at the back by his neck.
Struck helpless by his words, Kelsey stood there as if she’d been frozen. “I don’t know how to fix that for you. Helping you is my job and I’m good at my job.” Helping people defined who she was.
“I know.” He didn’t look at her, a bright flush colored his cheeks. “It’s okay. I don’t need anything. I’m fine. I’ll figure it out.”
Kelsey’s eyebrows furrowed as her lips scrunched to the side. “But you don’t need to figure anything out. I’m here to help you. This is what I do. It doesn’t make you less of a person to need help.” She considered his despondent expression. “I’ll be right back.”
She didn’t look back as she rushed from the room to the supply closet. After a moment of gathering items, she returned to his room with her arms full. Plopping her offerings beside him and leaning a couple against the bed, she smiled confidently and repeated patiently. “Okay, it’s my job to help you. You want help not needing help, right?”
He nodded, a question in his eyes as he finally looked at her. “That doesn’t make sense. You know that, right?”
She chuckled. “Just trust me, okay?” She grabbed from the top of the pile and shook out a pair of blue scrub pants. “If that gown is making it hard for you to feel better, then let’s try less... revealing clothes.”
Kelsey knelt and shimmied the scrub pants up his calves.
He leaned down and dragged them higher with one hand. “Thank you.”
Helping him stand while he pulled them up the rest of the way, Kelsey smiled. “Don’t think I’m leaving you with that gown either. We have pretty comfortable scrub tops. I’ll help you pull it on.”
She glanced at his waist where he held the waistband of the scrubs in his good hand. White ties hung in front of him. It would be impossible for him to tie them with one hand.
Kelsey’s mouth dried up with nerves. “Do you need me to help tie that?” Previously so sure of her job, she was suddenly shy, anxious to reclaim her professionalism.
JT cleared his throat, his answer hoarse. “Yes, please.”
With short, sure movements, Kelsey tied the strings, careful not to touch his bare skin above the light blue material. Her words were soft. “You’ll need to remove the gown, so we can put the top on.” She yanked carefully at the ties, pulling off the voluminous clothing. “I’m only going to disconnect the IV for a second, okay?” She undid the line and then removed the remaining material from his form.
A large black tire tread had been tattooed across his back like someone had driven over him. The shadowy depths of the dark angles gave the inked pattern a 3-dimensional effect. Kelsey caught herself from reaching out and tracing the lines between each shape. She did her best to ignore the muscular valleys and hills of his chest and arms.
Together they eased the new top over his injured arm and then up over his head, followed by the uninjured arm. JT winced as they maneuvered him into the shirt.
“Is that better?” She settled the shirt hem at his waist and reconnected the IV. She stepped back. “That’s not all.” Kelsey grinned as she retrieved crutches from the side of the bed and handed them to him. “You should be able to use at least one. Maybe not right away, but if you do it right, you’ll be improving faster than you should be. Just take it a step at a time.” Why hadn’t they had him up and moving around? Normally, hospital protocol was to get as ambulatory as possible to prevent pneumonia and other issues. Why they were treating JT differently stymied her.
Kelsey patted her pocket for her phone before removing it to check the time. “I better get going. I’m off the clock.”
She peeked at him from under her lashes. Would he be gone when she got back? She didn’t know how long they would watch him for his concussion. As it was, she was surprised he was even there that long.
“Can I ask you a question?” She continued at his nod. “Why are you still here? I mean, you don’t have anything broken. Most of your injuries are outpatient.”
“I’m insured. Like my whole body. So, they cover my injuries like I’m worth gold.” He laughed as he settled back onto the bed, carefully moving his leg onto the mattress. “My insurance pays extra to keep me in here to get the best care. I’ll probably go home in the next couple days.” He took Kelsey’s hand and turned it over, so her palm was cradled in his. “When will you be back?”
“I’ll be back tomorrow.” After that, it would be a few days. Her part-time schedule would never pay enough for what she needed to do. Kelsey pulled her hand from his. “Before I go, you should know I put in a call for extra security to your room. They said they’d send up an extra guy.” The nursing staff didn’t need to deal with the crazy that came along with housing a celebrity.
He stared bemusedly at her. “Okay. I’ll see you tomorrow, though?”
She chewed her lip as she ducked from his room, suddenly shy. She’d just helped him dress. Something needed to ground her a bit.
Her soft turquoise Volkswagen was the last thing she had from her parents. A lot of her mom’s stories had centered around her driving that bug around college. When her parents had passed in the car accident, in her father’s pickup, Kelsey had laughed for days while she’d cried.
Mom would’ve said, “Notice we didn’t get in an accident in the bug,” and she would’ve smirked at her husband while he’d smacked her rear end with his hand.
Kelsey had shoved what she wanted from her home into the bug and gone to live with her grandmother, who had early onset dementia. Kelsey had no idea for another two years just how serious her grandmother’s health was.
Inside her small studio apartment, four flights up, Kelsey tossed her keys on the miniscule counter. She didn't even take her scrubs off as she flopped onto the squeaky futon. Her phone buzzed on her hip. Who was calling her? She was so just too tired to care. She just wanted to ignore whoever it was. She sighed, wondering if she should even answer, or if she should just let it go to voicemail to allow her to get some sleep.
Huffing, she pulled the phone out. The number was restricted, usually a sign that it was the nursing home her grandmother had moved to. She swiped the screen to answer. “This is Kelsey.” Ugh, she wasn’t at work. A simple hello was fine when she wasn’t on the floor.
“Kelsey, this is Savanna in the billing department at the Whitman Nursing Home. We have tried multiple times to send you notices by mail. The last couple times you visited your grandmother, the nurse said you were resistant to talking with anyone about the matter of payment. At this time, we are forced to issue you a two week notice. That’s two weeks to rehome your grandmother. If you fail to do so, we will have to call the APS division.” The woman didn’t even stop to take a breath as she delivered her spiel.
Kelsey's heart sank. She didn't have the money to pay for her grandmother's care. Every cent she had was going into her schooling and her rent was behind on the furnished studio.
“I’ve been making payments.” Though not complete ones and she knew it. Kelsey pressed her fingers to the bridge of her nose.
“The money you’ve been sending in has bought you some time, but you’re delinquent on quite a bit of money. At this point, we simply can’t extend the time any further.” She didn’t lack compassion, but she was steadfast, unwavering.
Kelsey didn’t begrudge the woman for doing her job. She understood. Despair at the situation she’d put her grandmother into crushed her happiness at seeing JT. She would need to beg for more hours when she went in the next day. Maybe she could cut back on her sleep. As it was, she was already scraping the minimum of six hours a night.
The jobs available to her that would fit her school and studying schedule weren't enough to cover her living arrangements and everything else she needed to pay for. She was living on borrowed time and the deadline was finally catching up to her.
“I have two weeks? I'll get her out. Thank you for your help.” She knew what would happen. They would become more apathetic. Her grandmother would not be taken care of as well. It wasn't because they weren’t good nurses or good caregivers, but they would see her as a lack of income and not as a person. She was taking a bed that could help generate revenue.
Kelsey had to get her grandmother out and she needed to do it soon.
She looked around her sparse apartment with its chipped linoleum on the counters and pealing vinyl flooring. She didn't even have a bedroom. She separated the bathroom off with a curtain hanging from a rod between the toilet and kitchen.
Where would she put her grandmother? Dementia left her grandmother incapable of staying put for long. She got disoriented easily and needed a nurse, herself. A condition like hers required round-the-clock care. Outside of the facility, Kelsey would have to stay with her grandmother. There wasn’t a job or class schedule that would allow Kelsey to take the aging woman with her.
Kelsey sat up, placing her elbows on her knees. She had finals in two weeks and her grandmother to spring from the nursing home. She was overcome with overwhelming frustration and sadness. She was letting everybody down and she was trying desperately not to.
Hanging her head, she rested her face in her hands and tried not giving over to the threatening tears. “I don't want to let you down, Mom. I’m trying to take care of Grandma. I’m trying. I’m trying so dang hard, Mom. And here I am... failing.”
