Tom doesn’t like Annabel. Grace has always known this fact at an intuitive level, although her husband has never outwardly criticised her closest friend. It’s obvious from the set of his mouth, how it tightens at the mention of Annabel’s name. It’s obvious from his reservedness around her, and around Jarrod too: he seems to hold himself back in their presence, not chatting or being engaged to his usual extent. But Tom would never allow his personal opinions to get in the way of helping Annabel. Nothing would give him greater pleasure than seeing Daniel come out of this phase unscathed. Her husband always wants the best for everyone.
‘It’s so upsetting to think of Daniel in hospital,’ Grace sighs. The children have gone to bed and she and Tom have just sat down together. The television is turned down low. ‘Annabel’s confused about what to do next. I promised I’d ask you about what services she can access through the council.’
Tom’s blue eyes are solemn as he turns to look at her. ‘She should start with the drug and alcohol centre. There’s also youth mental health and a support group that meets in one of the local high schools some week nights ... I’ll find out which nights.’
‘Thanks. The difficult thing is that Daniel is not being cooperative. He doesn’t seem to want to be helped.’
There it is again. The tell-tale tightening around Tom’s mouth. The sense that he has to work hard to keep his true opinions to himself. This time he can’t seem to help himself. ‘There’s no point in locking the stable after the horse has bolted.’
‘Oh, Tom.’
‘It’s true.’ Her husband is unrepentant. ‘Daniel’s been given far too much freedom. Nothing good comes from kids his age being out late at night.’
‘How do you know he’s been out late? Have you seen him?’
Tom pauses before admitting, ‘I’ve come across him on my night patrol. At one of the parks with a group of boys. Obviously up to no good.’
Grace blinks. ‘You have? Why didn’t you say?’
‘I phoned Annabel straight away. She sent Jarrod to fetch him and specifically asked me not to mention it to you. Honestly, she seemed more concerned about keeping face than Daniel’s safety ... I presume, now that everything’s out in the open, it’s okay to tell you.’
Grace is lost for words. What was Annabel thinking? Why put Tom in such an awkward position? Why the secrecy? Did she think Grace would be judgemental, unsupportive or prone to gossip? Grace feels a familiar stab of hurt. All these years, and Annabel can still make her feel like this: as though she is inferior, a step behind; as though she is not worthy of trust.
‘When was this?’
‘About six weeks ago. The October school holidays.’
‘Did you speak to Daniel at the time?’
‘Just said a friendly hello. Asked him if he was going home soon.’
‘And what did he say?’
‘Told me it was none of my effing business.’
Grace can picture the scene. Tom meaning well. Daniel being horrifically disrespectful. Tom not being impressed with Annabel’s handling of the matter. His dislike becoming more entrenched.
‘So you knew Daniel was dabbling with drugs?’
‘I could smell weed. I was hoping it was the friends, not Daniel, but that seemed unlikely.’
‘Did you tell Annabel that part? What they were actually doing at the park?’
‘I couldn’t accuse Daniel outright, but I told her what I smelt.’ Tom stands up abruptly and stretches. ‘Are you coming to bed?’
‘Not yet.’ Grace feels deeply unsettled. How could she not have known about this incident? ‘I have a few things to do.’
He leans down, kisses her on the forehead, and she wonders what other things her husband has not told her.
Grace has another nightmare about Katy Buckley. Tom and Katy have become a couple. She finds them entwined together in the park down the road. Katy’s hair and clothes are dishevelled. Tom’s eyes are cold.
‘What are you doing with her?’ Grace wails.
‘I forgot to tell you,’ he replies emotionlessly.
She pushes Katy as hard as she can. ‘Get away from him.’
Katy throws back her head and cackles.
Something tugs at her arm. There’s a voice in her ear. ‘Mummy, Mummy.’
Grace has to fight to surface from the dream. Katy’s cackling is mingling with ‘Mummy, Mummy’. She opens her eyes and sees a white face hovering over her. She almost screams. Then realises it’s Lauren.
‘I’m scared, Mummy. There’s someone outside my window.’
Grace glances at the digital clock next to the bed: 2 a.m.
‘It’s okay, honey. I had a nightmare too.’
‘It’s not a nightmare. It’s real.’
‘Oh, honey. It’s probably a possum. Or Mrs Vaughan’s cat.’
Mrs Vaughan lives down the street. Her cat seems to have free rein and its night-time antics are the bane of the neighbourhood.
‘I’m really scared ... Can you come?’
Grace groans as she hauls herself out of bed. This is usually Tom’s job. Lauren mustn’t have been able to rouse him tonight.
The curtains are wide open in her daughter’s bedroom, and Grace is alarmed when she sees that the window has been slid across.
‘Lauren, honey, why did you open the window?’
‘I was trying to see what was out there. I was trying to be brave.’
Tom and Grace have been talking to Lauren about ‘being brave’, about challenging herself in little ways, but this is far from what they intended. Lauren could have climbed out of the window and they would have been none the wiser. Even worse, someone passing on the street could have spotted the lapse in security and climbed in. Grace’s heart skips a beat. She pulls the window shut. It closes with a clang, causing both of them to jump.
‘Okay, honey. Hop back into bed.’
‘Don’t go. Please don’t go. There’s someone out there.’
‘Shush. You’re being silly.’ Grace gives her daughter a hug and is dismayed to feel her small body quivering with fear. ‘There’s absolutely nothing to be afraid of, do you hear? There is nobody outside, not even that dratted cat ... But I’ll stay until you fall asleep.’
Lauren is satisfied with this. She climbs into bed and curls up on her side. Grace tucks the duvet around her and strokes her hair.
What is she going to do with this child? Is it foolish to hope she’ll outgrow the anxiety and develop into a confident young woman? What if these are the early signs of a lifelong debilitating condition? Is it time to see a GP or a psychologist? Why has she delayed? Is she as bad as Annabel, turning a blind eye to an obvious problem within her household?
If only money wasn’t such a problem. Paediatric psychologists don’t come cheap. Maybe Tom should stop being so damn nice and distribute more parking tickets; bringing in more revenue might make him eligible for promotion. Or maybe Grace should bite the bullet, compromise on her ideals about child-rearing, and return to the workforce sooner rather than later.
Lauren has fallen off to sleep, already snoring softly. Grace tiptoes back to her room. The nightmare comes rushing back as soon as her head hits the pillow. Tom and Katy writhing together on the grass. Logically, it should have been Tom and Annabel together in her subconscious. The two of them in cahoots, keeping secrets from her. No, she is being unfair and melodramatic. Annabel would have spoken instinctively, her prime concern protecting Daniel’s reputation. Tom just did as he was asked. He is not obliged to tell his wife every single thing that happens on patrol.
Grace’s mind has skipped elsewhere. Something’s jarring, not adding up. The yearbook entry that Annabel received. What were her exact words when they spoke about it on the phone?
There was something in there that nobody knows. Some trouble we’re having with Daniel.
Annabel lied, or else she simply forgot. Somebody did know about Daniel.
Tom knew.