I woke up early Monday morning surprisingly well rested. Either the damned occasionally pull a long shot, or eighteen hours of sleep, however fitful, add up. I plodded to the bathroom and took a hot shower. It was too late for the cold one. One lighthouse late.

By the time the medicine mirror fogged, I’d stepped a couple of feet further from my submissive cheat. Able to steer clear of the throat tightening guilt that had hand-delivered yesterday’s bender.

I climbed out of the lion-clawed porcelain, swiped at the mirror, stared at the permanent bags under my eyes, and left the face stubble alone. Nervous humor wasn’t an invite to play with razors.

Especially since I was unwilling to peer any deeper into my reflection. Boots’ fond farewell probably meant I’d successfully lied past my ride with Alexis; now I was the only accuser. If I kept looking it would make for a drawn out prosecution. And today was gonna be a hear-no-evil-about-Matt day.

I scurried back to the bedroom and perseverated in front of the closet. Running on repressed always walloped my go-get-’em. I finally grabbed a fresh pair of jeans and a clean tee. This wasn’t a day to dawdle. A tough decision, but I left my stash at home.

And seriously regretted it when I was bombarded by a series of surprises. The first was the Hacienda’s new front door.

“Alexis sent the door and someone to hang it,” Lou explained, breathing much better than the day before. “I could have done the job, but it was probably better this way. She and Lauren are out having lunch.”

The second surprise. Despite my internal hell, fire, and brimstone, I heated at the mention of Alexis’s name.

After we inspected the new oak, Lou led me into the comfortable kitchen while I body-blocked the image of the blonde flame. I wasn’t going to let a long distance hard-on sink my mood.

Lou was in the middle of a Bill and Bob’s roast beef, so we sat at the kitchen counter. He glanced at me but I shook my head.

“You’re sure you don’t want a bite? It’s a little early in the day, but I’ve gotten hooked.”

“I have better ways to clog my arteries.”

“You can’t find decent Chinese up here, but these guys make a good sandwich. Very lean.” He bit into the bun, some of the barbecue sauce squeezing out the sides.

“That can’t be good for your sugar.”

“Please, you’ll ruin my appetite.” Lou stuck the sandwich back down on its plastic wrapper. “Sometimes you make me feel too old to wipe my ass.”

“I’m trying warn you about junk food and you’re giving me shit.”

“Thank you. But not for your culinary recommendations. I know what you eat. Otherwise, you’ve been a real mensch.”

I caught him peeking at the sandwich. “Eat the damn thing,” I ordered.

“Are you sure you won’t have a taste? I zapped it in the microwave so it’s nice and warm.” Lou swallowed another large bite. “I tried something new last night,” he said, an amused, sly look crossing his face.

I reined in my frustration. “I don’t want to hear about your sex life.”

He grinned broadly, the sinkholes on his highway ignored. “Don’t worry, I don’t plan on giving away my secrets. I ate sushi.”

“Sushi?”

“It’s raw fish.”

“I know what sushi is, I just can’t believe you ate it.”

“When you think about it, it’s not much different than herring.”

“Pickled is different than raw,” I said, momentarily diverted.

“That’s right, the alta cocker tried something different. Is that so terrible?”

“That’s not what I mean.” I knew better than to continue, only I could never leave a fresh scab alone. “It’s just...” I waved at the plastic on the counter, “since you started coming up here, things are different. You’re... you’re eating raw food,” I finished, flummoxed.

“You miss the whole point, Matty. Lauren once played a record by a Black preacher with a tune about how you do different things because of love. You drive home early or you don’t come home at all, things like that.”

Lou’s struggle to quote Al Green would normally bring a smile. But today, Preacher Al’s song ran right up my guilty gut. I spun on the kitchen stool, “Do you have a beer?”

“You hock me about a sandwich, but it’s not too early to drink?” he ribbed, oblivious to my discomfort.

I hoped it wasn’t too late.

Lou handed me an opened bottle and picked up right where he’d left off. “My time with Lauren is teaching me I don’t have to live the rest of my life following old habits. I’m learning age is an attitude. And I’ll tell you something Boychick, love shapes attitude.”

The song said love shapes different attitudes. I felt something jar underneath my tight repression. Lou was running full bore toward something I might be fleeing. The realization rearranged pieces of my troubles with Boots and my night with Alexis, but now wasn’t the time to finish the puzzle.

Lou took a deep breath. “So I’ve asked Lauren to marry me.”

I looked at his happy face and felt my insides chill. “What did she say?” I asked, grinding into freeze.

“She thinks we should wait.”

I expected relief but didn’t find it. Didn’t find anything. “Wait for what?” The facts, goddammit, the facts. Maybe I did feel something, after all.

“She has to finalize her divorce.”

“Divorce? They haven’t been together for decades.”

“It’s just a formality. A lot of people wait until they need it.”

“And now Lauren needs it.”

“I hope so.” Lou actually blushed.

“This makes you happy, doesn’t it?”

“I feel things I haven’t felt in ages.”

“Any other reasons for this wait?

“We want to put all these events behind us—Ian’s accident, the car, the door. But to tell you the truth, I think the waiting will be over when the divorce becomes final.”

“What about your apartment, the buildings?”

“What about them?”

“I don’t see Lauren leaving the Hacienda, do you?”

“I’ll keep the apartment and we’ll use it for a place in the city. Lauren calls it something French...”

“Pied a terre,” I supplied, increasingly annoyed with Lou’s constant references to his personal Guru. Christ, now I was thinking like a leftover from the seventies. Well, maybe I was.

“The real question, Matty, is what will happen with the buildings when you live with Shoes.”

“When, not if?” Took the hit and counterpunched with my chin.

“The way you lovebirds have been together during the past year makes it look like when to me.”

This wasn’t why I’d come north. “I’m really happy for you, Lou, but I’m not here for an engagement party.” I saw his surprised hurt and added hastily, “I’m still worried about the shooting. Afraid you and Lauren are in danger.”

Conflict crossed his face but he rubbed it away with his hand. “I appreciate your concern, Matty, I really do.”

“But?”

“The Police Chief is working on identifying the gang. He tells us this sort of prank has never been repeated at the same location.”

“A drive-by is a hell of a “prank.” What about the stalking, the car?”

Lou shook his head helplessly. “If it were up to me I’d have you involved, looking into it.”

“Who is it up to?”

Before he could answer the brand new front door opened then slammed shut. “Goddamn that child,” Lauren steamed, her energy rocking the kitchen. “Goddamn all children.” Then, noticing me, “Sons-in-law don’t count. I’ll be right back, I want to hang up my jacket. No, I really want to hang Alexis, I’m settling for the jacket.” She turned on her heels and stomped out of the kitchen leaving a palpable void.

“Matty, don’t say anything about the proposal, please,” Lou whispered. “No one is supposed to know.” He seemed relieved to be out from under my drive-by questions.

Lou had nothing to worry about; I had no interest in playing Hallmark.

“So, Alexis stuck you with the check?” Lou teased when Lauren returned to the kitchen.

“The girl makes me furious!” Lauren exclaimed, clapping her hands. “She had the cheek to turn the shooting into another pitch for the Hacienda. All the same old arguments then, “Ma, why take unnecessary chances? Sure Teddy knows what he’s doing, but combine the shooting with the place falling apart, well, face it, it’s the right time to make a move.”

Lauren’s impersonation was remarkable. Slap on some long blonde curls, or maybe just take her clothes off and Mom would be her daughter. I flashed on the lighthouse, curled my toes, and felt the devil’s breath on my neck.

“She’s just trying to look out for you, Lauren,” Lou suggested.

“Like a fox looks out for a chicken.” Lauren grimaced, “Alexis looks out for herself. And for Paul.”

“Why is she so persistent?” I asked, forcing myself back into the room.

Lauren eyed me suspiciously. “What? You didn’t hear about the heartbreak poor Alexis goes through every time she sets foot in the Hacienda? How her childhood home is crumbling before her very eyes? The lawsuits that are right around the corner? What exactly did you talk about on your ride?”

“She mentioned a few things needed fixing,” I sidestepped. Me and my fucking mouth.

“Nothing we won’t take care of,” Lou assured me.

“It’s not the repairs,” Lauren said glumly, forgetting, I fervently hoped, the ride.

“I don’t even think it’s about money, though Lord knows, money is something Alexis is particularly fond of,” she added.

She hesitated. “Lou and I talk about this a lot,” Lauren said looking at me, her decision made. “I think Alexis wants to wrangle a deal to get the house for Paul and Anne. I also believe she wants me out of town.

“Could she pull it off?” Despite all my last rites, the moth kept fluttering.

“Alexis can pull a rabbit out of a hat. When the floor dropped out of the housing market I thought her real estate business was dead and buried. Somehow she survived and brought it back stronger than ever. There’s not too much that girl can’t do when she puts her mind to it.”

“Why would she want you out of town?”

“I embarrass her. I’ve always embarrassed her.” Then Lauren nodded toward Lou. “I think our relationship is the last straw. I also know living here keeps Paul wrapped up and Alexis believes it hurts his marriage.”

“This is where Lauren and I disagree,” Lou interjected. “Perhaps Alexis wants the house for her father, I don’t know. Kids get funny ideas when they come from broken homes. But Alexis has always been friendly toward me and very supportive of us,” he said, glancing at Lauren. “She didn’t have to fix the door.”

“Resale value,” Lauren instantly rebutted.

“Shainele,” Lou gently remonstrated, “Alexis might be mistaken, but she really believes it’s in your interest to sell.”

“Alexis knows I’ll never sell the Hacienda.”

“So the girl is stubborn, like other people we know.”

“You’re talking about me,” Lauren grumbled, losing some steam. “Maybe I see too much of myself in her.”

“It wouldn’t hurt to treat both you and Alexis with a little more charity,” Lou said.

“Maybe,” Lauren said, a smile softening her features, “but everyone isn’t as forgiving as you.”

Lauren turned to me, “Anyhow, I want to thank you for yesterday’s offer to guard the house. You really are going above and beyond.”

“Tell you the truth, I want to stay here for a little while.”

“Don’t be silly, we don’t expect any more trouble,” Lauren said tossing her head.

I pushed my stomach shudder aside and tried soft. “You seem pretty relaxed about having your front door blown away.” Something about that old door still picked at me but I couldn’t make it.

Lauren shrugged. “You don’t have to exaggerate, it was bad enough as it was. Ted will keep a tight watch until he’s absolutely sure about our safety. Believe me Matthew, Teddy Biancho is not going to let anything happen. The boy has his reputation to protect, and he’s a bear about protecting it. Anyway, he’s certain it was drunken joyriders.”

I tried hard. “But I’m not. Especially when I add it to your car and your uncomfortable feelings. It might be exactly what Biancho thinks it is, but I’ve begun to distrust all these coincidences.”