On the morning of the third day of their trip to Jamaica, Aubrey opened the blinds in the bedroom where Jenny was sleeping and shook her by the shoulder.
“Jenny, wake up. Wake up. Griff left,” Aubrey said urgently.
Jenny mumbled to leave her alone and turned over, throwing her arm over her eyes to blot out the light. Samuel the caretaker kept the rum punches flowing all night. She was hungover for the third morning in a row, and the sunlight hurt her eyes.
“Griff left without us,” Aubrey said.
“Huh?”
“Griff went to the airport without us. He’s gone!”
“Shit,” Jenny said, sitting up so fast that her head spun and her stomach lurched. “He’s our ride. How will we get home now?”
“That’s all you’re worried about?” Aubrey said, a note of hysteria in her voice.
“What else?”
Jenny looked more closely at Aubrey and saw what a wreck she was—sickly pale under a nasty sunburn, with purple circles under her eyes and fingernails bitten to bloody stumps.
“Did you sleep with Griff?” she asked.
Aubrey nodded and started to cry.
“How did that happen? Was it last night?” Jenny asked.
“No, it was actually yesterday afternoon. You remember, when you went to the beach?”
“Yes?”
“I’d been asleep by the pool. Kate, I guess, went off with Lucas.”
Jenny looked away, upset. “Yeah. I know.”
“I woke up, and went looking for—well, anyone. I found Griff—packing. I tried to talk him out of leaving. I succeeded, at least temporarily. One thing led to another, and we … did it. But I’m afraid it was just, like, consolation for him, you know?”
Or revenge, Jenny thought. “Oh, Aubrey. And it was your first time.”
“Please, don’t tell anyone that. My God, whatever you do, don’t tell Griff I was a virgin. I’d be mortified.”
Jenny shook her head in bewilderment. “It’s not a crime.”
“You know what I mean. People already think I’m weird. Promise me.”
“Of course I won’t tell Griff. What did he say to you exactly?”
“That he couldn’t take Kate’s attitude anymore. That she was crazy, and he had to get out of here.”
“So he left us in the lurch?”
“He wasn’t thinking about us. You know how Kate messes with his head. He wasn’t himself.”
“Stop making excuses for him. You should worry about yourself.”
Jenny’s well of sympathy for her roommate was running dry. Normally she would reach out and hug Aubrey at a moment like this, but a new feeling of distaste at Aubrey’s hopelessness overtook her. She had enough stress, keeping an eye on Kate’s drug use and erratic behavior, brooding over whether it was time to tattle to Keniston, without worrying about Aubrey, too. On top of that, she had a raging headache, and the bedroom had no air-conditioning. It was ninety degrees and close despite the open window, and she could smell Aubrey’s stale sweat.
“Look, I need a shower, and strong coffee. We’ll talk later.”
Jenny dragged herself from the bed and walked away from her own room, leaving Aubrey to gaze after her with tears in her eyes.
Half an hour later, after a lukewarm shower that made her feel somewhat better, Jenny headed down to breakfast. The veranda was thankfully deserted, the others hiding from the day in their darkened rooms. Looking toward the sea, Jenny took a deep breath of jasmine-scented air and told herself to at least try to enjoy her few precious remaining hours in this tropical paradise. Every morning, Ethelene put out rolls, coffee, and fruit, and the kids helped themselves—assuming they bothered to wake up. Jenny went to the sideboard and picked up a plate, thinking she might eat something after all. The vacation had been a sickening kaleidoscope of drunken nights and bleary days, yet its luxuries would be permanently etched in her mind, and make her want things. The palm trees and the aqua water, the gracious home with the sweeping vista of the ocean, the staff to feed her and clean up afterward. She wanted to be rich like Kate, but without the drama and the heartache. Was such a thing possible? Kate was the iconic poor little rich girl, living so far out on the edge that her feet were starting to skid off the cliff. She’d take them down with her if they let her. Since arriving, every one of them had been drunk or high every night, sleeping in the wrong beds, saying things they didn’t mean and couldn’t take back. Jenny wound up in bed with Drew two nights ago despite the fact that—she was pretty sure—he was gay. Nothing much happened, and they laughed about it in the morning, but still, she’d risked an important friendship. (Drew and Jenny saw eye-to-eye, and if she was honest with herself, she was more likely to keep in touch with him after Carlisle than with her wild and crazy roommates.) She didn’t blame herself. They acted out at Kate’s instigation. A dark magic emanated from the girl, from her Pre-Raphaelite hair and golden skin, from her marijuana pipe, that dazed them, and made them obey her whims no matter how self-destructive.
By the time Kate and Lucas staggered downstairs, it was late afternoon. They were red-eyed and catatonic, with matted hair, smelling of sex. When Jenny told them about Griff leaving, they merely nodded. There had been an ugly scene the night before, in the small hours while everyone else slept. Jenny heard the yelling, rolled over, and went back to sleep, but she hadn’t been surprised when Aubrey broke the news of Griff’s departure. Whatever happened was bad enough that Kate and Lucas had obviously been expecting him to take off, too.
“We have to get back home on our own now,” Jenny said, looking at Kate accusingly.
Kate shrugged and stared into her coffee. “People come and go as they please. What do you want me to do about it?” she mumbled.
“Griff left because of the way you treated him. You could at least take some responsibility for the fact that we’re stranded.”
Kate put her fingers to her temples and grimaced. “Lower your voice.”
“Meanwhile I’ve spent the day on the phone trying to clean up your mess, as usual. I reserved tickets for everybody on a United flight tomorrow morning,” Jenny said. She’d also placed a call to Keniston in New York, though she didn’t mention that.
Kate’s pretty mouth settled into a sullen line. “I’m not leaving till Sunday,” she said.
“They were the only seats I could find. Seven A.M. departure. It’s spring break. Everything else is booked. Drew and I want to get back to Carlisle on time, so we’ll be on it. If you want to stay, that’s your choice, but you won’t find an open seat until next Tuesday at the earliest.”
“Who paid for the tickets?” Lucas asked.
“Nobody. You can pay for yours at the airport,” Jenny said.
Jenny watched the alarm spread across Lucas’s face. It gave her a sick pleasure to think the expense would cause trouble for him. She wanted Lucas to suffer, she realized. They were all going crazy cooped up here on this hilltop, broiling in the sun and frying their brains with drugs and booze. How long until they were at each other’s throats? She had to get away; tomorrow wasn’t soon enough.
“I’m going to the beach,” she announced, and stood up.
She didn’t think they’d follow her. They were so lethargic they could barely hold their heads up. But as she collected her towel and sunscreen in the living room, Lucas skulked up to her.
“Hey, Jen,” he said under his breath, “I’m kinda short on money for the flight. I was wondering if you could maybe spot me something. I’ll pay you back, I swear.”
“You should ask Kate. She’s your girlfriend, isn’t she?”
“She says she’s broke.”
“This isn’t my problem, Lucas.”
“Kate told me the trip was free, or I would never have come.”
“And you believed her? You should’ve known better. Everything costs something,” Jenny said, and turned her back.
Jenny recruited Drew to come with her to the beach. The two of them had been going every afternoon—the only ones of the crew who’d bothered leaving the hilltop. Samuel was on his way to town and gave them a lift in his old Plymouth sedan, dropping them at the entrance to the cottage colony that they could see from the cliff’s edge. Small, brightly colored bungalows spread up the hillside. Jenny and Drew walked down a steep dirt path to the white sand beach, which was crowded with Americans and Brits of all shapes and sizes, some bright red, some pasty white, some a rich, deep tan. They wound their way through beach chairs and umbrellas down toward the waves, where they found an unoccupied spot to spread their towels.
“What a relief to be out of the lion’s den,” Drew said.
“Is it that bad?” she asked, pulling sunscreen from her beach bag and offering it to him. He squirted some into his palm and looked at her quizzically.
“I know they’re your friends. But honestly? Yes, it’s bad.”
Jenny rubbed sunscreen on her arms and legs, then lay down and closed her eyes, letting the sun bake the alcohol out of her. Drew’s comment hung in the air.
“Can you be more specific?” she said after a few minutes. “What’s bad about them, exactly?”
“Promise you won’t get mad.”
“Okay,” Jenny said with alarm, her stomach sinking.
“You’re one of the smartest, most ambitious girls I’ve ever met, and yet you’re known around campus as one of the Whipple Triplets. Is that what you want—to be mentioned in the same breath as a spoiled, druggie rich girl and a basket case?”
Drew’s words exploded in her head like little truth bombs. And yet, she couldn’t stand to hear her most ungenerous private thoughts spoken aloud. No matter what their flaws, Kate and Aubrey belonged to her, and she to them.
“That’s unfair,” she said.
“You said you wouldn’t get mad,” Drew said.
“I know, but they’re my roommates! I love them. I want to protect them.”
“Yes, exactly. You’re the responsible one, always saving their butts, while they behave however they want and break every rule. Don’t you worry something bad will happen?”
“Bad how?”
“I don’t know, but they’re reckless people. They do a ton of drugs, sleep with each other’s boyfriends, leech off people, piss people off. It’s off the rails. Bound to explode eventually. Just saying, be careful. Honestly, if I were you, I would think long and hard about rooming with them next year. But now I’ve had my say and I’ll shut up. Those waves are calling to me. Want to go in?”
Drew hauled himself to his feet and held out a hand to her. They ran together down to the edge of the water and waded into the crashing waves. The water was surprisingly cool and refreshing against Jenny’s skin. They swam out to where it was calmer, treading water, as a school of tiny silver fish swam by, tickling them. The water was so clear that she could see straight down to the pink polish on her toes. She looked back toward the crowded beach, and followed the line of the road up the mountainside. Far above, the mirage of Kate’s house glittered white against the green hills. The sight of it gave her a fierce twinge of foreboding.
When Samuel came to pick them up at sundown, Kate, Aubrey, and Lucas were in the car with him.
Kate leaned out the open back window. “We’re going to a pig roast, get in,” she said, smiling exuberantly. A strand of her long blond hair caught the wind.
“We’re in wet swimsuits,” Jenny said.
“It’s fine, you’ll need a bathing suit anyway. The restaurant’s next to this magical bay that glows in the dark. It’s bioluminescent, from these microorganisms that live in the water. You have to see it before you leave.”
Kate’s excitement was contagious. She pushed open the door and scooted over, and against her better judgment, Jenny climbed in.
“C’mon, Drew, you too,” Kate said. “I’ll sit in Aubrey’s lap.” She climbed on top of Aubrey, who put her arms around Kate’s waist and rested her chin on her shoulder. Everybody had magically made up. Well, maybe not everybody. Lucas sat in the front seat next to Samuel. He turned around and gave Kate a disgusted glance. Jenny tried to catch his eye, but he wouldn’t return her gaze.
Samuel dropped them in a crowded parking lot and they walked down the steps to an open-air restaurant by the water. The place had a concrete floor, a thatched roof, and a steel-drum band playing Caribbean music. They snagged a picnic table with a view of the bay and ordered a round of rum punches. Needless to say, nobody asked for ID.
The water of the bay was calm and muddy, and quite unbeautiful compared to the crystalline waves at the beach.
“Where’s the glow?” Jenny asked.
“When it gets dark, we go out on a boat,” Kate said. “You’ll see.”
A guy with dreadlocks and gold teeth turned a pig on a spit over a grill made from a giant oil drum. His long goatee was adorned with beads and a ribbon in the colors of the Jamaican flag. Every once in a while he would get up and croon a ballad, accompanied by the steel-drum band. Now he sang “I Bid You Good Night,” the plaintive lyrics set off perfectly by his high, sweet voice. “Lay down, dear brother, lay down and take your rest…”
“I love this song,” Kate said.
“It’s a funeral song, you know,” Jenny said.
Jenny had vowed not to drink so she would be able to manage the 5 A.M. wake-up call and long flight home the next day. But time dragged as they waited for the sun to go down and the pork to be ready, and her resolution fell by the wayside. Lucas had taken the seat beside her, and when he ordered another, so did she. It had been many months since they last talked. With two rum punches easing the way, they found themselves in deep conversation, reminiscing about high school, their Belle River friends. The conversation turned eventually to what they were doing now, and how each of them found Carlisle. Lucas was anxious and depressed. He told her about his hockey injury and how it had effectively ended his athletic career, something she hadn’t known. He seemed lost without hockey in his life.
“I’m so sorry,” she said, leaning toward him, squeezing his hand. “Kate never mentioned it.”
By the time the waitress brought them heaping plates of roast pork, rice, and beans, Jenny’s head was spinning from all that rum on an empty stomach. She’d eaten nothing all day but an ice cream at the beach and a couple of slices of mango for breakfast. Lucas’s face, his rich brown eyes, anchored her to the surface of the planet and prevented her from flying off into space. They talked and talked as if no time had passed, and her chest ached with how much she missed him. She looked out at the water, and the sky was dark. She’d been so wrapped up in Lucas that she forgot to watch the sunset.
“The boat’s leaving. Let’s go,” Kate said.
Jenny stood up reluctantly. They were the last five people to board, and had to take separate seats, wherever they could find empty ones, on the ledge that ran around the perimeter of the boat. Jenny ended up sitting beside the crooner from the restaurant, who also served as the captain of the tour boat. His name was Chesley, and he kept up a running patter of jokes and information as he steered the creaky old ferry out into the bay. Once they were under way, he turned off the lights on the ferry and told them to look back at their wake, which glowed yellowy green in the black water.
“Now lean down and drag your hands in it,” Chesley instructed. They all did that, and oohed and aahed at the sparkling trails they left. Jenny pulled her hand in from the warm water and stared at it, awestruck. It sparkled momentarily, bright as a disco ball, then faded and died.
The lights of the restaurant receded into the distance. A few minutes later, they came alongside a sandbar, and Chesley dropped anchor.
“Now we swim,” he said. “You got fifteen minutes, then I blow the horn. Get back to the boat within five minutes or I drive away and leave you to the sharks.” He laughed uproariously at his own joke. “Just kidding, they take my license for sure if the sharks get you.”
People stood up and began diving one by one into the water. They would hit with a splash, sending rings of glowing color radiating outward. Jenny peeled off her cover-up and swung her legs over the side of the boat, dropping down easily into the water. It was warmer than the ocean, and shallow enough to stand comfortably, the bottom made of fine silt that squished between her toes. There was no moon tonight. The sky and the water merged together into blackness. But wherever people moved, a luminous brilliance flared and then disappeared, like a candle being snuffed out. The invisible creatures clung to Jenny’s skin, outlining her limbs in electric radiance. She turned and Lucas was beside her, recognizable from his glowing outline in the blackness. They were alone behind the boat, the splashes and giggles of the others audible from around the corner.
“We’re in fairyland,” she whispered, running her hands through the water and setting off sparkling waves. His hair and eyelashes glittered as he came closer. “You’re made of magic dust,” she said.
He took her in his arms and held her close, and the world stopped spinning as they stood there. But when she raised her lips, looking for his, he pulled away.
“I miss you,” she whispered.
“Jenny, I need help.”
“Why?”
“It’s Kate. It’s like we’re in this sick game that I don’t know how to get out of.”
A powerful wave of bitterness swept over her as she heard the truth in his voice. The stupid fool was in love with Kate.
“If you think she’s bad for you, break up with her, or stop whining about it already.”
“You don’t understand. She’s inside my brain, under my skin. Even if I wanted to, I couldn’t escape.”
“What is wrong with you? You have no backbone? Leave me out of it, Lucas.”
Just then, the horn sounded, three long blasts, loud enough to make them jump.
“I’m going back to the boat,” Jenny said, and took off swimming toward the ladder.