CHAPTER NINETEEN

Eric and I make plans to meet again tonight, and then he suggests that we explore the Grand Theater and the rest of the Garden of Virtue and Harmony. We go through the motions of sightseeing, and he shares some historical information while I nod without taking in anything he says. Neither one of us seems to be enjoying this.

Maybe I should just call it a day. Then I look at the blooming trees and the peaceful paths surrounding me. No, dammit—I’m going to have fun even if it kills me. “Let’s go somewhere else,” I say. “What’s your favorite thing to do at the Summer Palace?”

“I have a lot of favorite things here.” The grave expression on Eric’s face lightens a bit. “What about a dragon boat ride on Kunming Lake?”

“Sounds good.”

At first, our conversation is stilted as we walk to the dock for the dragon boat ride, but the pleasure gardens of the Summer Palace eventually work their magic, and we both start to relax. It’s late afternoon and the place is relatively deserted of people, so we have the beautiful pagodas and lakeside paths mostly to ourselves.

“Wait.” I stop in my tracks and point dramatically to the lake and the sleek boats with awnings and pointed prows. “What. Are. Those?”

He peers over to where I’m pointing and grins. “Looks like pedal boats. You know, in all the times I’ve been to the Summer Palace, I’ve never tried them. Want to do it?”

“Duh! Of course!” I’m bouncing up and down in excitement. I’ve been on little pedal boats, but these are bigger and way cooler.

I let Eric have the first crack at the steering wheel, but it turns out that a pedal boat of this size is harder to operate than it looks. “Steer right!” I yell as we careen toward the dock.

The boat rental employees on the dock are yelling the same thing in Chinese.

Eric cranks the wheel to the right as we both pedal madly, but it doesn’t keep us from bumping the dock again. At least the next time, we actually clear the dock.

The people on the dock burst into applause, and Eric turns to me sheepishly. “There go my dreams of racing pedal boats.”

“Don’t give up on your dreams of pedal boat racing just yet.” I lean back against my seat and adjust my hat over my eyes. “We rented the boat for an hour, so you have plenty of time to redeem yourself.”

He pokes me good-naturedly. “Hey, you stopped pedaling!”

“You’re the one with pedal boat racing ambitions.” I grin at him. “Not me.” He pretends to glare at me, and I say, “OK, OK! I’m pedaling!”

The boat gliding over the glass-smooth lake and the blood pumping through my veins are just what I need. My spirits lift and stay strong, even when Eric asks me about the film.

To my surprise, I end up telling him about Friday’s shoot, the ugly suit, and Jake’s dismissal of my suggestions for Sonia’s character. The only thing I don’t tell him about is breaking up with Ken yesterday. That still feels too raw.

“Wait a minute.” Eric frowns. “Your director actually said the Chinese people were too ‘traditional’ to accept gay characters in this film?”

“Yeah. Why?”

“Well, it’s just that pre-Westernized, ancient China accepted LGBTQ people just fine. Records of same-sex relations go as far back as ancient China. In the imperial court, in monasteries, in Buddhist nunneries and love poems between Daoist nuns—it was everywhere and just a part of life.” Love poems between Daoist nuns—how cool is that? I’m still wrapping my head around that when Eric adds, “I’m not saying that there isn’t homophobia and transphobia in China today—because there is.” He snorts. “But modern Westernization is arguably more to blame for that than Chinese traditional values.”

Averting my face from a group of tourists on a dragon boat with their phones out, I say, “I get that. I mean, there’s still homophobia and transphobia in the U.S. too.”

“I’ll go as far as saying the modern Chinese government is more restrictive than yours when it comes to LGBTQ rights,” Eric says somberly. “I mean, same-sex relations were only decriminalized in China about twenty years ago, and same-sex marriage isn’t legal yet.”

“The U.S. didn’t legalize same-sex marriage until recently,” I admit.

“See, that’s my point.” His feet churn the pedals harder. “When I was in the U.S. for college, I met Americans who think of the U.S. as a modern, progressive country and China as stuck in the past. Like China never left the time of the Cultural Revolution when being gay was criminalized and punished. But we’re changing and growing like any other country. That’s why I think your director doesn’t have the whole story.”

We pedal in silence past pagodas and stone bridges as I think about what he said. He’s right that Jake doesn’t know the China that Eric knows, but maybe I don’t either. I certainly didn’t know about lesbian Buddhist and Daoist nuns in ancient China. It’s pretty cool that Eric knows all this history. Maybe that was his major in college. “By the way, where did you go to college?”

“Stanford.”

My eyebrows rise. “Most guys I know would’ve led with that.” And worked it into the conversation about a dozen times by now.

“I’m lucky that my parents could afford to send me there,” Eric says. “It would’ve been cheaper for me to go to college in China, but Stanford has a good sustainability program.”

“Is that what you majored in?”

“Hey, I think it’s your turn to steer. Want to trade places?”

It’s obvious that he’s avoiding my question, but I decide to let it slide. “You bet.”

He gets up at the same time I do, and the boat tilts dangerously. We both sit down again.

“Um,” I say, “why don’t you slide under and I’ll go, uh, over?” My face burns. Did I really just say that out loud? It didn’t sound quite so suggestive in my head.

Eric’s face is bright red. “Good idea.”

Gingerly, I stand and try to edge over to the driver’s seat without actually touching him. At the same time, he tries to scoot under my crouched body to the passenger seat.

I can’t explain how it happens, but suddenly I’m awkwardly perched over Eric, hands braced on either side of his body. My chest constricts in panic as he stares at me, wide-eyed, for a beat, his breath puffing hotly against my face. Then he abruptly ducks into the passenger seat, leaving me free to sink into the driver’s seat.

My heart beats fast, and my face is a perspiring mess. Carefully, we avoid looking at each other. And that’s when I remember Ken. Shit. How could I have broken up with my boyfriend just twenty-four hours ago and be all flustered and sweaty over another guy already? A guy who thinks my mom stole a painting from his family.

“Business,” Eric says abruptly.

I look at him in surprise. “What?”

“You asked me before what I majored in,” he clarifies, “and I majored in business, but I did take some classes on sustainability.” Then he reddens. “To tell you the truth, Stanford’s not even where I really wanted to go. That would be UCLA. I applied and got into their environment and sustainability graduate program, but I ended up deferring my admission and coming back home.” He starts to pedal without looking at me. “I didn’t even tell my parents that I’d applied or gotten in.”

The funny thing is that I applied and got into UCLA too, for my undergraduate studies, and I also deferred my admission. Except my experience is just the opposite of Eric’s. Lost in thought, I begin pedaling again. I’m pursuing my dreams against my parents’ wishes. He’s sacrificing his dreams to fulfill what he thinks his parents want. “I get it,” I say. “Your parents wouldn’t have approved, right?”

But he shakes his head. “No. That’s not it. They would have supported my decision.” He slows down his pedaling. “It’s just that they sacrificed so much for me and invested in my education, you know? I feel I owe it to them to come back and help with the business. Plus, Mimi . . .”

“Mimi what?” I prompt.

Eric averts his eyes and mumbles something in Chinese. Then he says, “I messed up.” He meets my eyes. “I told my parents that Mimi is hanging out with Alyssa. I shouldn’t have said anything, but it just slipped out. Then Nai Nai found out.”

I suck in my breath. “That does sound bad.” I don’t have the heart to say that tattling on Mimi wasn’t cool. Besides, it’s clear he knows that already.

“It gets worse,” he says glumly. “Nai Nai flipped out and even threatened to disown Mimi. That’s when my dad got into it with my grandmother. He said that it was his money in the first place, and he wasn’t about to disown Mimi because of her choice in friends. Mom tried to keep the peace, but it was too late.” He winces as if it’s a painful memory. “Dad said he regretted that his money got Nai Nai the social status to indulge in such a petty war with the Sung/Chua family. You would not believe the yelling after my father said that to my grandmother. My family usually gets along, but now it’s a complete mess, and it’s all my fault.”

“Oh, wow, Eric! I’m so sorry.”

“I tried to apologize to Mimi, but she won’t take my calls. I just want to see her and explain. It’s why I texted you.”

Right. I’d almost forgotten the plan. Why we’re here in the first place. Eric and I are nothing but collaborators. I yank on the steering wheel to turn us back toward the dock. “We should be getting back. I want to rest up before tonight.”

He nods. “That’s a good idea.”

Anything I felt between us was just an illusion. My heart twists painfully. Eric wants me to impersonate Alyssa so he can talk to Mimi. But that’s OK, I tell myself. I want Eric’s help too. He knows where Alyssa will be tonight. And I need to talk to her.