Giving Back: The Four Categories and Happiness 

Over the course of this book, I have repeatedly stressed how important it is to give something back. Perhaps you have already thought about what you give back to others—and why this is sometimes so difficult. On this last point, I have something valuable to say. (Note that the following model comes originally from one of my great role models, Anthony Robbins.)

For each of us, there are four areas of life that have an impact on our emotional world. Have you experienced those moments when everything is great? When you love your family, even your mother-in-law? When everything is going well at work, and you feel secure and strong? When you feel centered, you’re in the “flow,” and everything is just so? In these moments, you feel you could embrace the whole world. These are the moments in which we are able to give back the most. In order to achieve this optimal state, all of the four key areas of our lives need to be in perfect balance. We’ll now go through each one in turn.

Adventure

As you know, adventure begins where routine ends. It doesn’t matter whether you’re an energy vampire or a superstar—everyone loves adventures, big or small.

The difference is that everyone defines adventure according to their individual experiences. For the energy vampire, a visit to the football stadium is an absolute adventure in itself. For weeks, they dream about the away game, ironing their jersey and practicing the team chants—and in the end, the only thing they have to feel happy about is drinking too-warm beer with their mates. Mind you, that doesn’t stop them from drinking five or six in the first half alone!

If an ant wants to experience an adventure, they book an exotic package trip. Before they leave, however, they are required to listen to their energy-vampire colleagues making vigorous efforts to talk the trip down: people at your dream beach have been attacked by sharks on more than one occasion. Tourists get robbed by the locals. It’s hot in the Caribbean too, too hot. And so on, and so forth. Fortunately, you’ve now learned what you can do to resist such energy-sucking tirades. “When you have your own planet, you can make your own weather, dear colleague. Until then, it’ll be hot in the Caribbean and cold in the Arctic.” The dream thieves are killed off practically before they’ve had a chance to begin.

Diamonds understand adventures as a new kind of growth: seminars abroad, or life-changing experiences such as climbing a mountain. And the superstars? Well, they lead the diamonds in their mountain adventures. For them, there is nothing better than helping others attain diamond status, too.