Acknowledgments

Our hearts are bursting with gratitude; many thanks are in order.

This book would have been entirely impossible had it not been for the vision and all out enthusiasm of our lovely and super-sharp editor, Sara Carder. She “got” us and our ideas right from the start, and was always rooting us on. It would have been just as impossible without Michelle Tessler, our brilliant agent who has been a pillar of support and tremendous ideas all along. They were both fantastically patient and caring with us as they held our hands on this wonderful journey.

Many formidable sleep and child development experts reviewed material for this book. Thank you to Mark S. Blumberg, Ph.D., Editor-in-Chief of Behavioral Neuroscience; David M. Cloud, CEO of the National Sleep Foundation; Sujay Kansagra, MD, Director, Pediatric Neurology Sleep Medicine Program at Duke University Medical Center; Scott Rivkees, MD, Chairman of Pediatrics at the University of Florida College of Medicine; Nanci Yuan, MD, Director, Sleep Center at Stanford University; and Yael Wapinski, MD, pediatrician. We had the unique honor of consulting with the breastfeeding gurus Wendy Haldeman and Corky Harvey, founders of the unparalleled Pump Station and Nurtury, who taught us many crucial things about breastfeeding that truly take this book to a new level. Owner Cheryl Petran has also been incredibly supportive, for which we are grateful.

The dear, bright-spirited mommies in our Wright Mommy and Me groups, along with our sleep consult families—in all their new parent vulnerability—have been the most incredible teachers. Their honest discussion of the mind-bending effects of sleep deprivation, and understandable confusion over how to make it better, is what made us certain that the topic of baby sleep needed some real rethinking.

From Heather: My friends and family have been cheering me on every step of the way while writing this book. A special thank you for reading and giving me notes: Laurel Garber, Rob Garber, Ben Hansford, Madeline Holler, Brynn Karwas, Tootsie Olan, Mary Posatko, Justine Osborne, Amanda Salvado, Gillian Turgeon, and Robert Turgeon. A huge squeeze to Summer Drew, the beautiful photographer for our book cover and website.

Thank you to my husband, who knows my voice best, who gives me pivotal notes and is so enthusiastic about my writing, he wants all my sentences to end in an exclamation point! Your support for me, and every time you came home beaming with a marked-up draft in hand, has made this book possible. Thank you to my mom and dad, both scientists, who love and support me always, have been the biggest influences on my writing (if you can, say it with fewer words), and read everything I give them with the attention of a high-stakes grant proposal. I love you beyond words. My two kids, Dashiell and Eloise, who have the most beautiful faces and big hearts (thank you, Dashiell for your great ideas—many 5-year-olds will benefit from your bad dream–fighting techniques!) You two sweet little people are the reason I started writing about this topic, and you’re the source of all the inspiration and joy that has come ever since. 

From Julie: I need to thank my precious village; I couldn’t have done this without you. Sleep can be a polarizing topic—little did I know how much support would be bestowed on me from so many lovely people.

Words cannot describe how exceptionally talented and passionate my Wright Mommy and Me group leaders are, nor how their belief in this way of thinking about sleep and attachment, along with their support for this book, have been truly life changing for me.

My teachers, professors, colleagues, and most exceptionally, my mentor, Dan Siegel, MD, whose brilliant work and concepts formed the basis for explaining how an integrated way of understanding attachment, creates space for little ones to develop optimally and master new skills, while continuing to feel safe and loved. I am forever indebted to his passion and generous spirit.

I have such an insane wealth of friends who have cheered me on as this book took shape, I could never name them all here but they include friends from my childhood, my ballet class, my book club, my Culver City community and my life. You know who you are and I love you so much! A special thanks goes to Michael Sheehy, who has always believed in me.

The dearest of the dear are my Pump Station ladies, Carol, Judy, Kate, Rita, Linda Yadira, Dinora, Norma, Rosie, and many more. Your warm smiles and unfailing kindness to me will always be remembered.

I never thought I could write a book, but my family never doubted it. My parents and siblings (Stephen, David, and Susan) are the epitome of unconditional love and belief in me. The ringleader of this clan is my biggest fan, highest standard setter, and most loving presence in my life: my mom, Dorothy Wright. She also happens to be a pediatrician and the devoted mom of four who doesn’t remember exactly how she got all of us to sleep! My dear beloved father, A. William Wright, who died ten years ago, was a very thoughtful and curious thinker, a neurologist. I know he would have loved the exciting field of interpersonal neurobiology, which informs the marriage of brain science and human experience in a book like ours. I’m also extremely fortunate to have the gift of my fabulously lovable and curious son, Jack, who was my best teacher and inspiration. His quiet belief and pride in me, along with his gentle spirited drawings are priceless beyond my wildest dreams.