A Very Bad Monday for Danielle Desserts
It was the Monday after Pinky’s planticide, and Lou Lou was in Science class barely paying attention. She had way more important things to think about—Pinky, of course; Día de los Muertos; the changing murals; and Jeremy, who was being his suspicious self somewhere in Lou Lou’s very own school. A sharp voice interrupted Lou Lou’s thoughts.
“Louise Bombay, I asked you a question. Come back to reality, please!” The science teacher, Miss Mash, looked sternly at Lou Lou. Miss Mash had gray hair pulled into a bun and thin, pursed lips. She had a particular love of taupe. Everything she wore was taupe, like the color of a paper bag bleached by the sun.
“Please, Miss Mash, it’s Lou Lou, not Louise.” Lou Lou knew this was a lost cause. Most of her teachers used Lou Lou’s preferred nickname, but not Miss Mash. Whether she refused to do so or just didn’t remember, Lou Lou couldn’t be sure. But her bets were on stubborn refusal.
“My question wasn’t about your name,” said Miss Mash, looming over Lou Lou so that all she could see was taupe. “I asked you to tell me why water is important to our ecosystem.” Miss Mash used props in her lessons so she was holding a glass beaker filled almost to the brim with water.
“Yeah, answer the question, Lou Lou Loser,” said a high-pitched voice behind Lou Lou, followed by a chorus of giggles. Lou Lou felt her ears tingle. She spun around in her seat to glare at her nemesis, Danielle Desserts.
Lou Lou had known Danielle since first grade, but they had never been friends. Danielle was a snob who pranced down the hall tossing her hair and rolling her eyes at people who dared speak to her. She thought she was more grown-up than everyone else just because she was the eldest in their class by three days and wore lip gloss and pink shoes with little heels. It wasn’t as if Lou Lou had anything against lip gloss, and she loved her own hot pink sneakers—it was Danielle’s attitude that was the problem. And the truth was that whiny Danielle was one of the most immature people Lou Lou knew.
The real trouble between Danielle and Lou Lou started in third grade when they were both finalists in the school’s creative writing contest. Danielle wrote about the Sugar Mountain Sisters, Shelly and Sherry, two girls from her favorite books. When Lou Lou won the contest with her story about a talking fern, Danielle was furious. Lou Lou figured she was just jealous, but her jealousy turned into meanness.
“You probably think water is important because your stupid fern wants to make stupid tea,” Danielle said now.
Lou Lou mostly ignored Danielle Desserts and her snooty-girl posse. But after Pinky’s planticide, Lou Lou was in no mood for teasing. She skipped her chrysanthemums and turned to face her nemesis.
“Really, Danielle? Another fern insult?” Lou Lou gave her a hard look. “I’m sorry you didn’t win a prize. Your story was good, but it’s been a couple years now, and I think you need to get over it.”
Danielle scrunched up her face and Lou Lou knew she’d struck a nerve.
“Lou Lou Bombay, you’re just—just—just stupid!” shrieked Danielle. She’d never been good with insults. “The Sugar Mountain Sisters are just—just—just perfect!” Danielle wasn’t good with compliments either. “And so was my story,” she said, leaping from her seat to better glare at Lou Lou.
“Girls! Danielle! Louise! Stop this!” Miss Mash waved her arms. She’d clearly forgotten she was holding the beaker of water that started the whole problem. Lou Lou watched the water swishing back and forth, dangerously close to spilling over the edge.
“I’ve had enough chatter from you both!” Miss Mash flung her arm in Danielle’s direction and the entire contents of the beaker flew into the air and soaked Danielle Desserts.
Danielle screamed. She was a sopping-wet mass of blond hair and Sugar Mountain Sisters bows. Miss Mash looked shocked. Lou Lou tried not to laugh.
“Go to the principal’s office, both of you! Now!” shouted Miss Mash.
A furious Danielle spun around, her soaked hair spraying water on her snooty-girl posse. Lou Lou followed, but Danielle slammed the classroom door behind her. Lou Lou reopened it gently and stepped into the hallway.
Out of Miss Mash’s sight, she finally laughed. Even as the possibility of getting her first detention made her ears burn, Lou Lou couldn’t help thinking that the look on Danielle’s dripping face had made it all worth it. And she couldn’t wait to tell Pea.
