17
I Am Bold
Transforming Timidity into Boldness
“I was painfully shy and afraid of people. I never wanted to draw attention to myself. I tried to dress like everyone else and have everything in order. My school uniform was spick-and-span and I didn’t have a hair out of place. I wanted to disappear so that I would be invisible.”
My friend Ann Anderson is a successful business owner and leader of the Women Enhancing Business group at the Frisco, Texas, Chamber of Commerce. Ann is well liked and an influencer of women. I was surprised when she shared with me her battle to overcome timidity in her life.
“I could hardly make myself go to the grocery store when I was newly married. There were so many choices I would have to make and I was afraid to ask questions. I didn’t want to stand out. I was paralyzed.
“It was my husband, Thor, who was constantly pushing me out of my comfort zone. He would pull me into the grocery store that I was so afraid of and dance with me in the aisles. Here I was, afraid to be seen and making a scene dancing the waltz on aisle 11.
“Thor would say, ‘Of course you will get that promotion,’ and then push me out the door to get to the airport. I had to learn to walk through the airport alone and get on the plane. My weight was a real issue for me. I was 280 pounds and I could barely buckle the seatbelt on the airplane. I knew I had to do something, but felt powerless to change.
“I began to quote out loud: ‘For God has not given us a spirit of fear and timidity, but of power, love, and self-discipline’ (2 Timothy 1:7).
“I needed to remind myself that God loved me and that I was worthy. I was fighting through so much insecurity.
“I would stand outside of an office that I needed to walk into to do my job and say, ‘God, please help me. I need to walk through that door.’ The scariest part was opening the door. As I grew in my relationship with God, He spoke to my heart. By holding myself back, I wouldn’t become the person that He created me to be. So I forced myself to get out of my comfort zone.
“I had a horrible back injury that forced me to take stock of my life. I had back surgery with a long recovery, where I couldn’t do anything. I found myself praying a lot those days. For me, prayer is like a constant conversation that never ends.
“My injury and the medicine I took for it made me continue to gain weight. I wore black or dark blue all the time to try to hide how heavy I was. When I was challenged to work out, I didn’t even know if I had sweat pants that would fit me, I was so big. I began the journey of weight loss at the same time a change was coming in my work.
“I could tell that a transition was coming. When I had the opportunity to begin my own business, it took me three weeks to make the decision. As we prayed together as a couple, Thor and I sensed God calling us to take the risk.
“Beginning my own business didn’t just mean that I was taking a risk financially. I needed to get myself out in the public and build relationships. I had to listen and be in tune with God’s voice to help me through it.
“It’s scary to walk into a room and be bold enough to stretch out your hand and make a connection. I had to remind myself that the Spirit of God dwells in me. ‘If God is for me, who can be against me?’ (see Romans 8:31).
“I would tell myself, ‘If you can stand up and walk across the room, it will be better than you can imagine.’ I needed God to help me walk across the room. When I obeyed, I found contentment in being in God’s will.
“You will have to find courage and boldness to fulfill God’s call on your life. As I began to get busier in work, Thor challenged me to begin to work out at 5:30 in the morning before my workday. I said, ‘Well, if God wakes me up that early, I’ll go.’ Of course, God woke me up and I had to go.
“Day after day of working out and eating right made me begin to feel healthier. As I became healthier, I had energy to work out. When I began to fit into my clothes, I didn’t feel so out of place. I didn’t take a pill or follow a magic diet. It was getting up every day and deciding to be healthier.
“I needed to put God first and follow Him faithfully. He’s the One in charge of my business and my life. I have met the most amazing people in the last three years. God has helped me to overcome my timidity and walk boldly and confidently into my future. I haven’t arrived, but I am enjoying the journey of walking with God and obeying Him.”
Transforming Timidity into Boldness
Timidity is not only being shy, it also has to do with a tendency to draw back and hesitate. The key Scripture that Ann meditated on has helped so many people find freedom from timidity:
For God did not give us a spirit of timidity or cowardice or fear, but [He has given us a spirit] of power and of love and of sound judgment and personal discipline [abilities that result in a calm, well-balanced mind and self-control].
2 Timothy 1:7 AMP
The Amplified version explains that timidity is cowardice or fear. Ironically, timidity can be a type of pride as well. When we care more about what people think about us than how God thinks of us, our timidity becomes a preoccupation with self.
God has given us power, love, sound judgment, and self-discipline. We become bold and fearless when we are not afraid of what could happen to us. We are focused and committed to following the leading of the Holy Spirit rather than concerned with our self-image. Boldness leads to an adventurous, audacious faith that doesn’t back down from conviction.
Bold Faith
Jesus rewarded bold faith. When He walked on this earth, He responded to the faith of others. He was never too busy to be available to minister to people’s needs. One day, He met a prominent leader of the Galilee synagogue:
After Jesus crossed over by boat, a large crowd met him at the seaside. One of the meeting-place leaders named Jairus came. When he saw Jesus, he fell to his knees, beside himself as he begged, “My dear daughter is at death’s door. Come and lay hands on her so she will get well and live.” Jesus went with him, the whole crowd tagging along, pushing and jostling him.
Mark 5:21–24 MSG
Many Jewish leaders of the day were angry with Jesus, but Jairus was desperate. He didn’t care about protocol or public opinion. He was determined to save his daughter. As a leader of the synagogue in Galilee, Jairus was well respected. The synagogue was a place where people from the local community came to worship and study Scripture. A ruler of the synagogue would not only have taken care of the building, he would have been in charge of the order of the service. Jairus knew Jesus was the only one who could help him. So together they made their way through the jostling crowd, when Jesus was interrupted:
A woman who had suffered a condition of hemorrhaging for twelve years—a long succession of physicians had treated her, and treated her badly, taking all her money and leaving her worse off than before—had heard about Jesus. She slipped in from behind and touched his robe. She was thinking to herself, “If I can put a finger on his robe, I can get well.” The moment she did it, the flow of blood dried up. She could feel the change and knew her plague was over and done with.
vv. 25–29 MSG
Like Jairus, the woman was desperate. She’d had a continuous hemorrhage for twelve years. The Old Testament Law forbade the woman to go out in public. Since she was considered unclean, everyone she touched would become unclean. Jesus reversed the curse of the law. He had the power of God to heal, transform, and restore the woman from the years of suffering and isolation. She had already tried everything, but the doctors of the day were unable or unwilling to help her. They took her money, but she continued to bleed.
The woman focused her faith on touching Jesus. She knew the Pharisees would condemn her for being in public. She knew the Law. If she touched a rabbi, she would make him unclean. But Jesus was different. She knew that all she had to do was touch the hem of His garment and she would be healed. She struggled and strained through the crowd and at last touched Him:
At the same moment, Jesus felt energy discharging from him. He turned around to the crowd and asked, “Who touched my robe?”
His disciples said, “What are you talking about? With this crowd pushing and jostling you, you’re asking, ‘Who touched me?’ Dozens have touched you!”
vv. 30–31 MSG
Jesus carried the healing presence of the Holy Spirit. He was so in tune that He sensed the healing power going out from Him and immediately stopped to minister to the one who had risked all to touch Him. The disciples were concerned about going to the next place, while Jesus was available every moment He was on the earth. Jesus didn’t worry about the disciples; He stopped to look for the one who had touched His robe:
But he went on asking, looking around to see who had done it. The woman, knowing what had happened, knowing she was the one, stepped up in fear and trembling, knelt before him, and gave him the whole story.
Jesus said to her, “Daughter, you took a risk of faith, and now you’re healed and whole. Live well, live blessed! Be healed of your plague.”
vv. 32–34 MSG
Jesus knew that the woman not only had a physical need for healing, but also a social and emotional need to be totally restored. He went deeper, crashing through the twelve years of oppression with a single moment of redemption.
The woman had begun with trembling, but pushed past her fears to boldly reach out and touch the hem of Jesus’ robe. She risked it all. Did you notice how Jesus responded to her boldness? He commended her faith and healed her body, mind, soul, and spirit. He went deep into the place of pain for this woman and repaired the breach she had with the community of faith. In one moment, Jesus replaced her shame and timidity with the honor of being made completely whole.
The Touch of Jesus
I don’t know the hidden plague that you fight through. I don’t know the hidden physical, social, and spiritual needs of your life. However, I have walked with people long enough to know that we all have those areas where we need the touch of Jesus to set us free.
When you are tempted to get stuck in your past and draw back, follow the woman’s example and press toward Jesus. Risk it all. Jesus can be trusted with your deepest places of pain. Prayer is deeper than the words we speak. Prayer includes the internal struggle of our soul to break through and find healing and restoration with Jesus.
Boldness helps you to press beyond the norms and expectations of our culture. Being obedient to the call of God on your life will demand, at some point, that you are audacious, dauntless, and relentless in your pursuit of His help. No one is courageous in their own strength. True courage comes from God.
You are transformed as you take steps of faith. You become fearless when you keep your eyes on Jesus. The things that used to frighten you will no longer cause you to hesitate and draw back. Concentrate on God’s availability to minister to your need. It is His Spirit alive in you that makes it possible for you to walk in boldness. Facing your fear will free you to see God’s power at work in your life.
Shake yourself awake. Shake off your excuses. Do what God is calling you to. Do it afraid, if necessary. Just get moving. He takes the mess of your life and weaves His message into it, but you have to take action.
Bold prayer releases the promises of God in your life. I have found that there are times to wait in peace to receive God’s blessings. There are other times that I have to move forward with great effort and lay hold of what He has promised. I have to move forward and not hesitate.
In prayer, I have found this Scripture helpful: “The kingdom of heaven suffers violent assault, and violent men seize it by force [as a precious prize]” (Matthew 11:12 AMP).
The things in your life that you need may come to you with the simplicity of God’s faithfulness. However, the things that you really want, that are connected to your destiny, will require you to expend great energy, focus, and risk to seize. Like the woman who was going against all the cultural norms of the day to touch the hem of His garment, you will need to press through your fears with bold faith.
Jesus did not promise us that we would have no fear in this life. Rather, He challenged us to take heart and overcome our timidity with faith and boldness. Jesus said that we would experience trials and stress. We are able to overcome because He overcame. Jesus said, “These things I have spoken to you, that in Me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation; but be of good cheer, I have overcome the world” (John 16:33 NKJV).
You and I are not promised a pain-free existence, but we are promised an overcoming life. In the very difficult things that you struggle and strain to overcome, He meets you with His power. Time after time in my own dark hour of the soul, when life looks pitch black, a hymn of hope will rise up in my heart and come out of my mouth in the song “Great Is Thy Faithfulness.”
God sees me in the middle of the night, tears dripping down my face, quietly singing, “Great is Thy faithfulness.” He hears me in the morning light standing with my face lifted to heaven singing, “Great is Thy faithfulness.” He intimately connects with me as I load the dishwasher and wipe the counters singing in my heart, “Great is Thy faithfulness.” Our life of prayer is deeper than spoken words and needs to be released as we sing our worship to God.
God’s faithfulness penetrates the cold, deathlike grip of fear. His faithfulness transforms perspective. His faithfulness shoots courage into my veins, making it possible to more than just survive a dreaded day. In this world you will face terrible things. You will experience excruciating pain. Fear is a given in this world. The final promise of eternity will outlast all of our fears: “He will wipe every tear from their eyes, and there will be no more death or sorrow or crying or pain. All these things are gone forever” (Revelation 21:4).
Hope stirs my faith when I remember that in the end we win, because He won on the cross. Every tear that I weep as I am crying out for His help is recorded in heaven’s books. The injustices that we suffer through in this life are exchanged for His justice in eternity. In this life, God will use the things that you and I have walked through to impact others.
God Sets the Captives Free
We have all been imprisoned by secret areas in our lives. It’s a level place at the foot of the cross. Whether you are a murderer, a molester, a thief, or a mom at home impatient with her children, all of us have sinned and fallen short of God’s best for our lives (Romans 3:23). All of us need His keys to set us free.
When we hold His keys in our hands, we have bold access to His preferred future for our lives. Jesus had all authority in heaven and on earth and He gave it to us (Matthew 28:18–20). He commissioned us to walk in His authority and make disciples. He set us free to be freedom fighters for others. We can boldly walk like Jesus walked. He gave us these keys to release the captives, and set the oppressed free (Luke 4:18–19).
One day I was walking and praying on a path near our home. I was deep in prayer when I had a vivid picture come to my mind. I saw people behind bars in a jail cell. Some of the people were standing up grasping the bars and trying to shake themselves free. Others were pacing back and forth. Still others were slumped down sitting on a stool. They had given up. They were no longer trying to get free. They had resolved in their minds that they would always be stuck in that dark prison.
When I looked closer at this picture, I realized that each person in the cell already had keys hanging around their neck. One key said faith and the other key said obedience. I pictured one of the prisoners placing both keys into the locks on the prison door. Suddenly there was an explosion. Their prison bars blew open and were instantly transformed into the railings on a bridge.
As I turned the corner on the walking path, I saw a bridge with railings on it. It was a powerful moment. I felt like God was saying to me: The very bars in your life that have bound you in the past will become the rails of a bridge to breakthrough. He showed me that the foundation of the bridge was faith and obedience. I walked across that bridge and found freedom in Christ.
Jesus is the Life Bridge. There is an incredible gap that could not be bridged without Jesus’ laying down His life for us. Because He laid down His life for us, we are able to cross over to the other side. In the same way, we lay down our lives for others, and they are able to find freedom in Christ.
Each one of us needs to boldly take His keys in our hand and with faith-filled, obedient hearts break out of our places of captivity. In what area of your life do you need to take action right now? Have you become passive in an area and given up? It will take boldness to overcome things that have bound you in the past.
Your Life Matters
Sometimes the struggles that we face seem insurmountable and we begin to give up. We slump down and give in to the pressures at home and at work. We give in to the temptations of our flesh. We lower our expectations in life because we don’t want to be disappointed. We lose our youthful zeal for God and settle for mediocre.
If that’s you, you need to shake off your complacency. Your life matters. The freedom you find in Christ will help those who follow after you. The struggle is worth it. It is not in vain.
To be bold is to not hesitate. Boldness overcomes fear in the face of danger. You may have to break the rules of propriety in order to become a hero of faith. Boldness stands up and fights when fear cowers and hides. To be bold means that you will stand out rather than try to fit in.
It is sometimes difficult for women to walk in boldness. As women we often wait for someone to give us permission. We don’t want to be perceived as pushy, and we want to walk in submission to God and our leaders. The Enemy knows this and wants to keep our unique contribution to the world hidden with hesitancy and timidity.
Timidity is comfortable when you hide in mediocrity. But God didn’t make you to be mediocre. He made you to boldly overcome. The difference between a victor and a victim is that a victim gives in to the circumstance. A victor overcomes the adversity and makes it into an opportunity to serve others.
Boldly believe that you can overcome. The keys to becoming a victor have already been given to you because of what Jesus did on the cross. Put the keys of faith and obedience into the lock of your life, and see the power of God transform the bars that once held you into a bridge of breakthrough.
As a woman, you can play the part of the heroine in the story. Yes, it’s true. We like to be the fair maiden who is rescued. Yet when we realize that Jesus already rescued us and that He gave us keys to rescue others, we will stop hesitating and waiting for others to answer God’s call.
Stand up and fight. You have a unique call of God on your life that is worth fighting for. It will require you to be boldly obedient to God’s higher call and let fear and timidity fall to the ground under your feet.
~PRAY~
Jesus, I am answering your call today. I am tired of letting my fear trap me in hesitancy. I repent of my complacency and choose to take action. Jesus, I want your mission to be my mission. Your Spirit, Lord, is already on me. You have anointed me to speak good news to the poor. You have sent me with keys to set free the captives (Luke 4:18).
Make me bold like you. I will lay my hands on the sick and see them recover. I will heal the eyes of the blind so they can see. With your help I will help the oppressed go free.
Lord, your favor is on me for a reason. The favor you have given me is to help others.
Give me your compassion for the burdened. Help me to be sensitive to those tugging on my shirt sleeve. Cause me to notice the one in the jostling crowd that you have sent me to set free. It’s by your power and authority that I am a ministry agent of change in people’s lives. I embrace your call; I am available for your assignment. Mold me. Use me. Fill me. I cast off my hesitant, timid cloak of complacency. I put on the apron of humility and boldness, ready to serve everyone you send me. In Jesus’ name I pray expectantly. Amen.