It’s been one hell of a day. From the way it started I figured Jamie and I would end up taking a boat ride over to Assateague and spending some time at our special spot we had years ago. Instead I’ve been dealing with a catastrophe and I’m not just talking about my truck. While I was giving a report of the theft and destruction of my property, my brothers’ went to see if they could catch Leigh at the apartment. Instead they discovered our place was trashed with no sign of Leigh anywhere. Then Alice and Coop both return from checking on Jamie to tell me everything I owned has been burned on her front lawn.
I’ve had to call the insurance company, and my buddy to tow in my wrecked vehicle. Without transportation I’ve had to rely on my dad to drive me around, up until he had to go into his restaurant for the busy Sunday church rush. After dropping he and Alice off, I finally had time to stop by and see Jamie. She hadn’t been answering my calls, but it appeared her phone was turned off.
I’m taken back when I pull up and see a burned circle in the front grass, although none of my belongings remain. Someone has cleaned up the mess, and I have a feeling it was Jamie. She’s got to be frustrated with whole ordeal. I said we’d take it slow and then threw myself full steam ahead into something neither of us were prepared for. I’m ready to jump into forever with this woman without closing other chapters in my life first. Now I know the mess I’ve made of things. I can only hope she’ll be patient with me while I figure things out and rebuild what I’ve lost.
I’ve been living here for weeks, yet find myself knocking to make sure it was okay to enter. Jamie comes to the door wearing different clothes than earlier. She offers a half-smile. Leaning in to kiss her feels natural. As I back away I see the torture in her eyes. “Hey, you.”
“Hey, yourself,” she answers. “How are you?”
“Well,” I start as I sit on the couch. “I’m walking around wearing the only clothes I have left, give or take some things I may have left behind at the apartment when I rushed out of there the first time, though I’m sure she’ll destroyed them too.”
“Brant, I’m sorry. I feel partly responsible for all of this.”
“It’s fine. It’s my fault. I should have ended things with her from the beginning. I thought giving her some time to calm down was a better idea, but now I know the error of my ways.”
“Is she in police custody?”
“Not yet.” I let out a deep sigh. “Hell, she’s probably left town, run back to her parents, or shacked up with someone we both know to try and get a rise out of me. At this point, I wouldn’t put anything past her.”
“Brant, you’re not going to like this, but I don’t think it’s a good idea if you stay here right now.”
“Don’t say that.”
“You should have gone home last night. Now she’s hell-bent on ruining your life. Think about it. What’s important to you?” She asks.
“You.”
“And.”
“And what?” I’m sort of lost. It’s not like I’ve been resting enough to handle this type of stress.
“And if I’m important to you, wouldn’t that mean I’m next on her hit list?”
“She’s not an assassin.”
“At this point, I wouldn’t rule anything out.
“I don’t want another day like today, Brant. I can’t handle it. I have a business to run, and now my uncle is on me about losing clients because of it. Excuse me if I’m freaking out a bit. It’s all just too much to take. I’d rather let it all die down before we move forward.”
I take her hand and hold it. “Are you breaking up with me already?”
She laughs. “No. We’ll pause. We’ll meet in private and when this is all over with we can talk about being out in the open about it.”
It breaks my heart to hear her pushing me away, but I see no other way around this. I have a mess to clean up, and I honestly don’t want her involved. Besides, I think we both need a little time to absorb our feelings. Things are intense between us. I’m drawn to want her with me all the time. We have to learn how to be together without feeling scared or nervous if one of us walks out of the room the other won’t feel lost.
“You’re right. It’s a good plan. Just promise me you won’t go anywhere, or fall for the dentist. I hear he’s young and on the prowl.”
She smirks. “I’m scared of the dentist, so you’re safe there.”
I lean my head against hers and we stay like that for a few seconds. I close my eyes and pray this is real, and that after everything we’re going through I’ll be enough for her.
Jamie decided to visit with her parents for a few days while I dealt with my problems. We’ve been in touch, but it’s not the same as being able to hold her in my arms. After discovering she arrived safely in New York, I got on the horn with the insurance company and the police. Leigh still hadn’t surfaced, which made me nervous. To protect her property while she’s away, I’ve sent Weston and his girlfriend of the month over to stay at Jamie’s house. We also installed an old security system outside just in case we needed evidence of tampering. The animal hospital has it’s own alarm company, since there are drugs kept on the premises, so we know that building is pretty safe.
Meanwhile I’ve been staying at Oyster Cove, doing my best to keep from searching for Leigh on my own.
I wait two more days before venturing back to the apartment we used to share. It’s still a mess, furniture turned over, clothes and decorations strewn across the floor in each room. The only thing left on the bed is a folded piece of stationary with my name on it. I open it, knowing it might lead to her whereabouts, or at least give an explanation of when she went off her rocker.
Brant:
I don’t know where to begin. A few weeks ago we were talking about forever. We were making plans, prepared to buy a house and get married. Now it’s all gone. I’ve tried to give you space. I’ve looked the other way when I knew you were seeing Jamie, but I can’t do it anymore. I think you should know that I’ve decided to terminate the pregnancy. I can’t love you and carry your child knowing you’re in love with someone else, and please don’t you dare try to deny it this time. I know for a fact that you left me and ran right to her. God, it killed me to drive by and see your truck there, but then to notice your reflections in the upstairs window. I’m in pieces.
I’ve tried to be fair. I know I made threats, and said things I’ll take back later. For two years you’ve been wonderful to me. I never knew there was a side of you that still loved someone else. We both know who ruined us, and it wasn’t me. You broke my heart. You took all of my dreams away. It would have been better if I never told you about the pregnancy, because hoping we were getting back together makes this harder.
Now I’ve done things I can’t take back. I’ve committed crimes. Taking your truck made me feel better at the time. I knew you were in that bedroom with Jamie, so I went back and got the keys. The windows were smashed out before I even realized I was doing it. I took all the anger and pain I was suffering from and let it out. Then I left the truck where I knew it would hurt you the most.
You hurt me, so I want you to suffer. You deserve to hurt. You need to feel what it’s like to have your heart ripped out of your chest. By now you’ve probably seen it. The police may be looking for me, not that they’ll find me. I’m not coming back to the island. I hate it here, and you were the only thing holding me back from leaving. After what I’ve done to your property and ending my pregnancy I know you and I are through. You got exactly what you deserve. Fuck you and your little slut who ruined my life.
Leigh
Her words get to me. She’s right. I did this. She’s too blind to see we were never perfect together, but it is my fault that she’s broken. I’m responsible for breaking her heart.
I crumple up the paper and toss it. Maybe she’s got a point. I got what I deserved.
The following day I drop the charges on Leigh. There was no evidence for them to officially charge her anyway. It was speculation. I’m in a ton of trouble with my insurance company, so I’ll probably have to pay out the ass to have my truck fixed, but it is drivable for the most part. At least it will be a project I can work on with the guys when we’re not working come winter.
Jamie returns after one week away, but she refuses to let me move back in. She’s adamant to make sure things are better before jumping back into bed. I’m suffering without her.
That same week I get a call from a number I don’t recognize. The voice on the other end shocks me. It’s Leigh and she’s crying.
“Hello?”
“Brant, it’s me.”
“You have a lot of nerve calling me after what you did.”
“Screw you. As far as I’m concerned we’re even.”
I’m already furious. “You burned my damn life away. Years worth of memories are gone. I had nothing to wear. No shoes. Who does that?”
“A woman scorned.” She manages a cackle. “Everything I burned can be replaced. It’s not like my heart that you ripped to pieces.”
I start pacing. “Not this again.”
“You don’t deserve to be happy, Brant. You took all my hopes and dreams and spit them out in front of me.”
“What about my baby that you killed?”
“Screw you.”
“You already did, Leigh. It’s over. We’re done. Stay out of my life.”
“No problem.”
The line is silent. I check the call and see that she’s hung up. Obviously I hit a never. It serves her right. I would have been a good father, even if we couldn’t get along, even if she didn’t want to raise the child, I would have stepped up and done the right thing. It’s not fair, but I finally get it. I went about things the wrong way. I was selfish the second I learned Jamie was back in town. I couldn’t think straight. I have to make amends, and in doing so the dominos started to fall.
I can’t change what’s done. I can only look forward to what’s next.
Twenty seven days later and I’m about to start seeing a chiropractor for my aching back. I need a real bed, but refuse to rent an apartment when all I want to do is be with Jamie. We talk every day and go on dates that usually require us to drive out of town to be on the safe side. She celebrated Thanksgiving with my family, and I’ve been over for dinner, but we’re no closer to announcing to the world we’re together, and I’m tired of it.
Without asking her permission, I use my key and go into her home when she’s working late. I’ve managed a surprise and planned a special dinner to celebrate a new beginning for us. I have no idea what she’ll say, but I’m tired of waiting. I’ve waited my whole life for this woman and she’s too close to hold out any longer.