I
Just calm down. Just breathe in. Just breathe out.
Saffron had no sense of time as the hours passed. She could only guess from the singular streak of sunlight that stretched her shadow, telling her it had only been a day since Sylver had put her in here. But it felt like it had been several days, or months, maybe even a year.
She hadn’t slept. She couldn’t stand being trapped in a room so suffocatingly small. And quiet. So quiet. The silence taunted her like a beast watching its prey, waiting until she was vulnerable enough to be swallowed alive. The caliginent is here. She couldn’t handle the feeling of helplessness as she prayed to Hell someone would let her out soon. They can’t leave me here. They can’t—
THUD. THUD. THUD.
Someone knocked on the door, and then it creaked open. Thank Hell. Get me out of here.
“I hope you enjoyed your night, missy.” Mr Woods was standing straight, trying to add a few inches to his height.
Missy? Again? Saffron stretched her mouth to form a smile. “I wouldn’t quite rate it five stars. I’ve seen better places.”
“Really?” He grunted. “Maybe we should give you another night. See if you change your mind.”
“No. Actually you’re right.” A note of panic clung to her voice. “It was a nice stay. And I think one night was plenty.” Please get me out of here.
“Great.” He wore a thin, dry smile. “Take these.” He threw a set of clothes onto the mattress. It was the Detention uniform the prisoners had on that introductory video. A white top and light-blue trousers. A plain, blank slate. “Change into these. Put all your belongings in a pile. But keep your own shoes on.”
Keep my own shoes on? Saffron looked at her muddy military boots. I would have chosen better if I’d known that.
“You have one minute,” he said before shutting the door.
“Wait, you don’t have to shut the—”
“One. Minute.”
THUD.
The door closed. The walls caved in again. Not again. Please not again. The room felt smaller than before, as though it were trying to crush her body and force the air out of her lungs. Calm down. Just one more minute and then I can get out. Just. One. Minute.
Saffron looked at the uniform Mr Woods had dropped. It was oversize and probably had been worn by many others before being passed onto her. But she didn’t care. She knew her appearance would be a mess either way. The faster I put this on, the faster I can get out.
She took off her leather jacket and black clothes, then threw on the new blank uniform, noticing stray threads falling out of it. At least I can keep my own boots. At least I can keep some part of myself. She also kept on her bracelet, hiding it beneath her sleeve.
“Okay!” she shouted, crashing her hand against the door with a THUD THUD THUD. “I’m ready!”
No response.
“You can let me out now!” THUD THUD THUD.
Still no response.
“Please let me out!” THUD THUD THUD. “Don’t leave me here again!”
Her heart increased its racing tempo. She didn’t want to stay here. No, she couldn’t stay here. It’s been a minute, hasn’t it? It must have been a minute. She shut her eyes. Or has it been longer? She tried to take deep breaths, but the air was too thin and sparse. They can’t keep me here for much longer. She had spent so long running that she had forgotten what it was like to finally stand still.
The caliginent is here. The word made her shiver. It will catch you and eat your mind. It made her feel like the shadows wanted to devour her. It’s here. Like they were glad she was alone with them. Here. Like they were waiting in their mask of darkness for the right moment to tear off her flesh and devour her insides. It’s here to take you away—
“Saffron!”
She opened her eyes. The door was unlocked. Finally. She was free again. Free? Not quite.
“I said let’s go, missy!” Mr Woods shouted.
Cautiously she stepped out of the room, unsure if he was going to push her back inside. Let’s get out of here. She looked at her pile of clothes, at the identity she was leaving behind. Hurry up. Then she looked ahead of her, at the new role she was stepping into, the new mask she was putting on.
She couldn’t hear anything around them. No footsteps, no noise, not even a sound from the audience. But she could see, as now there was light in the corridor. It wasn’t anywhere near as dark as yesterday, if it ever really had been that dark.
Mr Woods grabbed her arm. “I said let’s go now. Don’t waste my time.”
Her shoulder continued to yell in pain as he pulled her along the corridor. But she didn’t show it. She could never show it. She could only smile. “I can walk by myself.”
“Well done.”
She tried to rip her arm free from his claws, but he only gripped tighter. “Then let me go—”
“I don’t want you to slip away again.”
“You mean you don’t want to get embarrassed in front of your mate again?”
“Keep talking and I’ll take you back to the Quiet Room.”
She let herself smile wider but decided not to give him the satisfaction of a response. Instead she looked around, noticing how narrow the corridor was. Old posters, outdated information leaflets, and security cameras covered the walls. I still think the cameras are fake. The corridor looked just like the one near the interrogation room, as though they had copied the design exactly.
“Where are we going?” she asked.
“Where do you think?”
“You tell me.”
He sighed as though he didn’t have the energy to speak to her. “Just hurry up.”
Mr Woods turned them around a sharp corner then led her to a staircase. It was another set of cold metal stairs. But now there were stairs going down as well as stairs going up. Up? She saw a white door at the top. Its bright paint made it stand out from its surroundings, glowing in the darkness of the stairwell. And there was a neatly written sign across the middle that read, Helios.
“What’s up there? What’s He-Li-Os?” What even is a Helios?
“It’s restricted.”
“Restricted? So it’s forbidden? Does that mean there are secrets up there?”
“If you want to spend another night in the Quiet Room, you can go find out.”
“You can’t even tell me what it is?”
“I don’t want you to make a habit out of going places you don’t belong.” He pushed her onto the stairs going down, farther into Detention’s depths. “It’s this way to your cell.”
My cell? A drip of sweat fell down her forehead. She didn’t like the idea of being trapped somewhere. Cell. She hadn’t been stuck in one place for a long time. Cell. It made her feel like a caged bird that had forgotten how to fly. My. Cell. She hated it already.
They went down one flight.
“This place goes farther down?”
Mr Woods didn’t respond. Saffron didn’t know if he couldn’t be bothered to answer or if he wanted her to feel scared or both.
Two flights…
How does this place go even farther down? The stairs made it seem like a bottomless pit, like they were walking into a Tartarean abyss she could never climb out of. It made Saffron wonder what was waiting at the end of it and what kind of uncontrollable beasts were kept this far below the surface. Beware the caliginent.
Three flights…
Mr Woods’s claws dug into her skin, but she forced herself to stay calm. Just breathe. She had to keep herself together, even though she already felt herself falling apart.
Four flights…
Five flights…
Six flights?
“This way.” Mr Woods pulled her into another identical corridor. Again, it felt exactly the same, but darker with hot, thick air. She swore even the posters, the mayoral election flyers, the sheets of boring information, the security cameras—they were all in the same position. It was as though nothing had changed and nothing was going to, like a stationary theatre set—until she reached the end of the corridor where she finally found something different.
A large frosted-glass door waited for her.
“Your room is number thirty-nine.” Mr Woods released her from his grip. “Got it?”
Saffron rubbed her arm, feeling the sting of pain swim through her shoulder. “Got it.” She smiled but knew it was full of anger.
She then watched Mr Woods take out a key ring from his belt and unlock the door. Unlock? A chill scuttled over the back of her neck as she realised the prisoners were trapped inside like rats in a cage. There is no escape. Or maybe they were locked inside like untameable monstrosities that were too evil to be set free. No. Escape.
“Don’t get yourself into trouble again.” He stepped back then pushed her towards the door. “I hate it when people make my job harder than it already is.”
“I’ll be on my best behaviour for you.”
“Sure you will.” He didn’t believe her. No one did. “Go on now. Don’t waste my time.”
She stopped in front of the door, listening for sounds or movements or any sign of life, but again heard nothing. It was a strange feeling, having only shadows and security cameras following them. It felt like they were almost alone. Almost.
II
Fading streaks of afternoon sun fell through large barred windows. Saffron didn’t understand how light had made it this far below the surface. It should have felt comforting but instead felt disorientating. It obfuscated her sense of direction, reminding her she couldn’t escape even if she tried.
She had stepped into a long, wide corridor. The walls were painted with the same dark white colour as the rest of the building, but here they seemed brighter. It looked like the scenery had just been put up, freshly decorated for the audience’s enjoyment. It created an intimidating poker face that refused to show its secrets, covering every crack beneath its surface.
Now, finally, there were people. Hives of prisoners walked across the corridor. They wore the same white shirts and blue trousers, which should’ve drowned them into the same person, but they didn’t let it. Instead colourful strands fell through their hair. Their shoes maintained unique styles and personalities. Subtle jewellery, make-up, accessories, and tattoos decorated their bodies. And large hungry smiles were plastered on their faces. Smiles?
The smiles turned to watch Saffron as she walked down the corridor. Why are they watching me? She could hear their insatiable hunger as they looked towards her with bared teeth, happy to find fresh meat in their den. Don’t show any fear. She stood with tall confidence but knew they could smell through her façade to the trembling unease below. Don’t run. Keep your movements steady. She scanned over the numbered doors on the wall opposite the windows, focusing on finding her cell—
But then she heard them laugh. Laugh? Gasps of snickers escaped their mouths as laughter burst through their breath. Why are they laughing? Their hunger grew louder as they imagined tearing her to pieces and devouring her organs—but not until after they had played with their food. They needed to taunt her first for their heedless amusement and see what she was made of, if anything at all.
Saffron twisted her fingers around her shoelace bracelet as she counted the cell doors, focusing on the numbers that kept her safe from their stares—twenty-four, twenty-five, twenty-six—but their muffled laughs only grew louder. Twenty-seven, twenty-eight, twenty-nine. She felt a weight push down her shoulders, which were as heavy at Atlas’s—thirty, thirty-one, thirty-two. It was as though she could sense something wasn’t quite right about this place…
It was as though she could sense I was watching her.
I saw her scurry down the corridor—thirty-three, thirty-four, thirty-five. I was waiting patiently for her, enjoying the terror sweeping across her face as she realised she was trapped here. Thirty-six. I joined the mountain of laughter, relieved to have her in a place where she could no longer run away. Thirty-seven. In a place where she finally would have to face me. Thirty-eight.
I kept my gaze on her as she put on a smile that was no longer hers. Thirty-nine, finally. Then she slithered into her cell. It’s almost as bad as the Quiet Room. Almost. The space was small, with a bed and a toilet squeezed in. A mirror with a large crack in it hung above a sink. The walls were the same dark white, repainted several times to cover up stains and scratches, hiding how nauseous it truly was. Worn-out posters covered the bigger marks, with meaningless quotes like “YOU CAN DO IT.” But I know it’s a fiery gulf of pain no matter how they hide it.
Saffron sat on the bed, feeling how thin the mattress was. She kept twisting her shoelace bracelet. She didn’t know what she was supposed to do next or how she was supposed to find answers and find Ray. She was lost. She was scared. She was alone.
“Hey, are you okay?” a soft Irish voice began from the doorway.
Well, maybe not completely alone.
“Indie?”
“You really had to, like, go and do something-something stupid on your first day, didn’t you?” He leant against the wall, hunching his shoulders.
Stupid? “Well…” She thought for a second, looking him up and down.
He wore the same Detention uniform, but his was much baggier. It was strange seeing them in the same clothes when usually their styles were entirely different. But it was nice he was able to keep his trainers. They were far too big for him, but that would never stop him from wearing them.
“I had to make a grand entrance, didn’t I? For the audience?” She stretched her mouth back into a venomous smile. “Why? Did you miss me?”
“Did I miss you?” His own smile creased his eyes. “Normally I celebrate anytime I don’t have to-to deal with you.”
“I can’t blame you for that. I’d do the same. Part of me thought you wouldn’t want to speak to me after I got caught.”
“Not speak to you? I wouldn’t dream of it.” He would.
“That’s good to know.” She knew he would.
“But seriously, Saffron, can you just-just tell me what’s going on?”
She took a breath, feeling how thick and hot the air now was. “Don’t be mad.”
“No, no. Stop starting your sentences like that. Just-just tell me.” He ran his hands through his hair, pushing his black and purple strands away from his face, before they fell down again.
She tapped her fingers against her knees. “I found Ray’s file.”
“Ray?”
“Ray.”
“So you’re-you’re still looking for answers?”
“I’m still looking for him.”
“Saffron—”
“Hear me out.” She took another breath. She tried to stay calm. “Ray has been gone for so long now. I think it’s time we find out what happened to him.”
“We can’t—”
“We can. We’re in Detention. We’re literally in the place he was before we lost him. The place that did something to him, that changed him, that made him leave us.”
“We don’t know this place did anything to him.”
“We do know. He wasn’t the same after he left Detention. Something happened to him in here. And we have to find out what.”
“But—”
“Listen.” She lowered her voice. “I found his file and looked to see if anything was in there that could give us a clue.”
“A clue? This-this isn’t a game.”
“I saw something strange in his file.”
“Strange?”
“Strange.” She nodded. “I saw some notes he had written in his stupid, barely legible writing.” The caliginent is here.
“Notes aren’t very strange—”
“‘The caliginent is here,’” she whispered. “‘Beware the caliginent… The caliginent will catch you and eat your mind… It’s here.’”
Indie frowned. “The caliginent?”
“Yes, isn’t it—”
“You risked everything just to-to find notes he had written on the-the caliginent?” He always sounded more disappointed than angry.
“Don’t you think it’s odd? Why would he have notes about the mythological creature of shadows in his file?”
“Why wouldn’t he? You know he-he was in Detention when he wrote all his caliginent plays and stories, right? He became obsessed with that myth when he was here.”
Saffron nodded as if she remembered. She hadn’t thought about Ray’s plays in a long time.
“And you know he used to love planning stories by scribbling onto any surface he could find.”
She nodded again. She really should have remembered.
“Well, there-there you go. There’s-there’s the answer to your ‘mystery.’ He was just-just planning for his stories.”
“But the notes felt like they were real.”
“Real? How? They-they were just stories.” Indie paced around the small room, walking back and forth. Back and forth. Back and forth.
“But you’ve heard the rumours about Detention, right? That a monster watches and tortures the prisoners? What if the caliginent is that monster?”
“Now you’re believing children’s stories?”
“No, but what if Ray wrote those notes and plays because of what happened to him here? Like what if something bad happened that put these monsters into his thoughts?”
“You’re really grasping at-at straws now. Ray had a good imagination—that was all.”
“Or what if they were warnings about what happened to him in Detention? What if this is the reason he’s gone? What if this is the explanation we’ve been waiting for?”
“You sound delusional.” He sped up his pacing, moving back and forth, back and forth, back and forth.
Delusional? “Don’t you want to find him? Don’t you want to know why he left and get some answers?”
“There aren’t any answers here. Or mythical caliginent monsters.” Back and forth. Back. And. Forth. “You-you sound insane.”
Insane? “Insane? But what if I’m right? What if there’s something in this place that—”
“Saffron! Stop it. Ray isn’t here.” He stopped moving. He’s. Not. Here. “There’s no point trying to-to-to find him because you can’t. Okay? You-you can’t.” Indie pushed his hair back again. “We shouldn’t be trying to find answers that-that-that don’t exist.”
“But—”
“But you can’t go around risking your life just because Ray wrote about mythological creatures when he was in Detention. You-you-you can’t keep doing such stupid matchstick things.”
Matchstick? “Matchstick? Seriously?” She tapped her fingers faster against her knees. He was annoying her. He was annoying me.
“Look, I’m just-I’m just scared for you. You got into trouble on your first day. That means the teachers will be watching you, maybe even targeting you.”
“Why would–”
“I was thinking about it and there’s-there’s no way we were put in Detention because we were protesting. The Shade usually ignores student protests. So there-there must be something more to it. Someone must be-be out to get us or-or watching us or—”
“Now you’re being paranoid.”
“What happened to your cheek?” His eyes landed on the cut Sylver had made. It still looked as fresh as it was yesterday.
“Nothing, it was an accident.”
“Did the teachers do that?”
“No.”
“Then who did?”
“No one.”
“Saffron. Just tell me.”
She sighed. “It was a Shade officer.”
“Shade? It was…it was Sylvester, wasn’t it?”
“I don’t think he meant—”
“I knew it. He’s been watching us. He’s-he’s trying to keep us here. He’s-he’s-he’s trying to hurt us, just like he hurt Ray. Maybe he’s…maybe he’s the reason we got brought to Detention. Maybe he’s-he’s the reason we’re here or he’s-he’s—”
“Indie.” She grabbed him by the shoulders. “Take a breath.”
He paused, keeping his eyes fixed on her cut. Then he took a long breath in. And out.
“The Shade used us as an example to stop others from protesting and disrupting the mayor’s election. That’s all. Now we just have to do our time and get out. I’m sorry for getting into trouble, okay? It was a mistake.” She smiled, putting her mask back on. Indie’s not going to help me. He’s only going to slow me down.
“Okay, okay.” He pulled at his earlobe, rubbing it between his fingers. “I’m sorry too. I just…I just don’t know how to handle being stuck in here.”
“Neither do I.”
“Yeah, I can tell. You’re definitely doing worse than I am.” He laughed.
“Shut up.” She laughed too.
“Just-just please stay out of trouble, Saffron. Don’t waste your time looking into something that doesn’t exist. And keep away from Sylvester. I don’t trust him.”
I have to keep away from Indie too if I’m going to find the answers I need. “I know.”
“We just need to be good and get out early.”
I just need to find out what happened to Ray. “We do… We will, okay? We will.”
“Okay, okay.” Indie took a long breath out. “Do you…do you want to get some food? Apparently it’s all right from what I’ve heard.” Indie held out his hand towards her.
She stared at his hand but didn’t take it. “Not now.”
“Okay. Then do you want to join me later in signing up for drama class?”
“Drama?”
“Yeah. If you do an activity or whatever, it can help you get out early. The drama class is actually what Ray did when-when he was here. It was the one thing he liked about this place. Maybe you could-could join too? It could be like our time in college? Doing plays together again.”
She kept her eyes on his outstretched hand but still didn’t take it. Doing plays together won’t be the same without Ray. “Maybe.” I need to find Ray.
“It’ll be-be fun to act together again, won’t it?”
“I said maybe.”
“Okay, okay.” He took his hand back. “Well, if you change your mind, you’re more than welcome to join me. And you can come to my room anytime. I’m only in room fifty, so I’m not- not far away really.” He let the silence sit for a moment. “Just-just be careful, Saffron.”
“I’m always care—”
“Please. You-you can’t afford to get into more trouble.” He stared more intently at her.
I can’t afford to get caught. “I know.”
“And please don’t disappoint me.”
“Me? Disappoint you?” she said with a devilish smirk. “I wouldn’t dream of it.” She would. Of course she would.
III
Saffron tapped her fingers against her knees as she waited in the darkness of her cell. I need to get out of this room. She waited for the noises in the corridor to die out. I need to prove I’m right and Indie’s wrong. She waited for the shadows to sleep. I need to show him there are answers here. She waited until she thought no one else was around. I need to show everyone I’m right.
All she wanted to do was find Ray. It had been too long since she had seen him, since she had spoken to him, since she had hugged him. The caliginent can’t just be a story. She could barely remember the plays Ray used to write. It can’t just be a mythological creature. All she knew for sure was the word caliginent deeply unsettled her. It has to be real. Just hearing those syllables ca-li-gi-nent made her heart beat louder. It has to be a mystery I can solve—her breathing increased—it has to be a clue, her mind raced—because it’s the only one I’ve got.
THUD.
She looked up. What was that? She crept to her cell door. Wait. Then realised it had locked. No. She tried to push it open but couldn’t. Seriously? She looked for a keyhole, a mechanism, a lever, anything. But saw nothing.
THUD. She bashed her hands against the door. “Hey!” she shouted. THUD. “You can’t do this!”
Only silence responded.
There really is no escape. She let a silent burst of frustration out of lungs as she turned back to the room. I can’t stay here. The shadows tightened their grip on her, slithering around her neck. I can’t do this for eight weeks. The quietness cackled as it trapped her in its void. I can’t even do this for another night. The walls caved in on her, trying to crush her bones into dust while the darkness ate her alive—
Then a laugh broke the silence—a bright, melodic laugh coming from the corridor.
Then another laugh joined it.
And another.
And another.
“Teachers” definitely wouldn’t laugh like that. Hope lit up Saffron’s eyes as she pressed her ear against the door. A murmur of voices danced across the silence, mixing with laughter that didn’t want to stop.
THUD. She knocked on her own door again. “Hello?” THUD. “Can you hear me?” THUD. If they can get out, I can too.
The laughter grew louder and louder. And. Louder.
“What is it?” a voice said, their words becoming clearer. “One of the newbies trying to get out?”
“Should we help them? Or should we let them rot?” another said with a snicker.
“Hello?” Saffron shouted. “How did you get out of your cell? How did you undo the lock?”
“It’s probably nothing. Or it’s just like the pipes or something?” one of the voices continued.
“You think pipes are that noisy?”
“I can’t hear anything else. Can you?”
“Hello? I’m here! I’m not the pipes!” Saffron shouted again, even louder.
“Or maybe it’s just the floorboards creaking above us?” They kept on talking as though she weren’t there.
“How loud do you think floorboards are?”
“Or maybe it’s the monster.”
Monster?
“Yes, it’s definitely a monster. That’s the most logical solution.”
Their laughter continued like a cruel insult.
“Can you not hear me?” Saffron yelled.
“I actually think that cell belongs to the person who got sent to the Quiet Room on their first night,” another, warmer voice began, before giving a melodic laugh.
“Oh. So they’re the lucky son of a bitch they chose this time?”
“Those guards are such assholes. They always take someone there on the first night.”
“Well of course they do,” the warmer voice said. “They like to put on a performance for the new inmates. It’s a tactic to frighten them all right from the start.”
“It also means the guards will be watching this person, right?”
“They are always watching after all.”
Are they really always watching?
Their laughter crescendoed to a cacophonous climax, bouncing around the corridor with roguish amusement.
THUD. THUD. THUD. Saffron knocked on her door again. “Can you tell me how to get out of this room?”
“Come on. Let’s go. I hear those creaky floorboards again.”
THUD. “Wait!”
“You mean the pipes?” another sneered.
“No, you mean the monster?”
“I don’t think monsters know how to speak.”
THUD. “Wait. You can hear me? Wait!”
The laughter died down as their voices grew quieter, until only silence remained once more.
“Please!” THUD. “Don’t leave me here!”
Saffron turned back to the four walls that were stopping her from running away. There’s no escape this time. She felt like she was stuck in a glass jar, where no one could reach her…
Except for her shadow. It patiently waited in the corner of the room. Hope never comes. Its visible darkness looked hauntingly monstrous in the night’s shroud. Only regions of sorrow. Its humanoid shape was distorted as the limbs mangled themselves around its body and its claws twisted into a scimitar. Only torture without end. And it was crawling towards her, eager to reach out and consume her…
She shut her eyes and turned away from the unknown darkness. I can’t do this. Her heart didn’t stop to rest as it crashed against her chest with a thud-thud-thud. How am I supposed to sleep here? Her fingers couldn’t stop fidgeting, tapping against her knees. How am I supposed to stay here for fifty-six days? Her body was gasping for air that couldn’t be found. I just need a moment to catch my breath. Just a moment. Just… The walls were too tight, caving in on her as the shadows suffocated her—beware the caliginent—gradually making the room smaller. I can’t stay here. And smaller. I can’t do this. And…