Have you ever heard an angry teacher ask a student, “What’s the matter with you?” Another popular question is a snide, “Do you have a problem?” You do realize, of course, that both of these are rhetorical. The teacher is not truly expressing concern and indicating that she is willing to offer some support. Students definitely realize this, and they usually respond to these types of “questions” with defiance. Inadvertently, the teacher is setting students up to retaliate with an attitude that mirrors her own. This is never productive and is always unprofessional. There are much more appropriate and productive ways of finding out what’s bothering a student or what’s causing him to misbehave. Today you’ll be sharing one simple technique for dealing effectively with a student who is doing something inappropriate.
Demonstrate for your teachers the rhetorical questions we just shared with you. Ask if they’ve ever heard or said the following:
Now ask,
Tell your teachers that today you will be sharing a simple technique for dealing with inappropriate student behavior.
The technique is called the “Are You All Right?” technique. It is based on the simple premise that students who believe you care about them are much more apt to behave better. Here’s what you do. The next time a student misbehaves, take him aside (not in front of his peers) and ask, “Are you all right?” (You ask this, of course, with a voice and demeanor of caring and concern.) You might be surprised at the look on the student’s face. Almost always, the student will answer, “Yes.” Then say, “Well, the reason I was asking is that the way you were behaving in class was inappropriate and not at all like you.” (Okay, so maybe you’re stretching the truth a little, as the behavior is perhaps very typical of that student.) Continue by saying, “I knew that for you to be acting that way, something must be bothering you. And I just want you to know that I’m here for you if you’d like to talk about it.”
That’s it! It takes only a few seconds. Did you deal with the misbehavior? Yes. You made it clear that it was inappropriate. Will the student’s behavior improve? Almost always!
Please note that what you did not do was very important. You did not dare him to do it again. You did not act personally offended by his actions. You did not threaten him. You did not belittle him. You simply expressed caring and concern.
As you send your teachers off to attempt this technique, remind them of the following:
∗The italicized section is from Annette Breaux and Todd Whitaker, Making Good Teaching Great (Larchmont, NY: Eye on Education, 2012), p. 98. www.eyeoneducation.com