Inside Dr. Lehman’s office with the door closed, Hannah bolted to her feet and began pacing. “I don’t want to know this.”

Dr. Lehman pressed the ends of his fingers together. “That’s not the reaction I expected.”

“You told me when I woke from that coma that I couldn’t have babies.”

“No, I said you were unlikely to, and I had no idea you thought ‘unlikely’ meant no chance. Although looking back at how young and confused you were, I guess I should’ve clarified it long before now.” He tapped the latest edition of a medical journal that lay open in front of him. “There’s an article in here that says after a few years of healing, women who were in your situation and your age bracket conceived again without medical intervention.”

“Why are you telling me this now?”

“Because I thought you’d be glad to know, and if you’re not, then you definitely need to know, don’t you?”

His reasoning was sound, but this information would only complicate things between her and Martin. She plunked into a chair.

Dr. Lehman propped his elbows on his desk. “Want to talk about why you’re reacting like this?”

Hannah shook her head, wishing the news meant life and love and joy. Instead it meant confusion and…probably arguments and compromises.

“Hannah, I really thought you’d be encouraged by the news.”

“One would think.” She ran her fingers across her forehead. “Martin’s asked me to marry him, and he doesn’t want children. I’ll have to agree to use birth control when the time comes. Do you know how difficult that is for someone who’s been raised Amish?”

“As a delivery doc for the Plain community, I’ve got a strong idea. It crosses a moral line for most, and in spite of being such a practical group, their love of family outweighs all else.”

“I didn’t want to know this.” Her eyes met his.

He closed the journal. “I can tell. Need to go for a walk or something?”

She wanted to go spend time with Martin and hope he had something wise to say that could make this news work for both of them. He had his usual pre-Thanksgiving entourage at his house right now, playing music and enjoying the day without her.

Hannah glanced at her watch. “How close do you think Elsie is to delivering?”

“With it being her first, a while yet. I suspect at least five hours.”

“Can I go to Martin’s and you call me when her time is closer?”

“You’ve been with her, answering her questions, since before she was married. She’ll be upset if you’re not here.”

“I know. I’ll be back.” She needed to sort through this, and seeing Martin always helped.

“Be back here in two hours.”

With her head spinning, Hannah drove to Martin’s house, wondering how she’d tell him. He’d probably tell her not to worry about it, that he’d have a vasectomy or she could have her tubes tied or something. Not being able to conceive was one thing, but trying to prevent it? That was an issue she hadn’t worked through. The idea of birth control was disconcerting to the very center of who she was. And if she could possibly conceive, she’d need birth control for decades, not just a few years.

Deciding that after their trip to Hawaii was probably a better time to share her newfound info, Hannah felt a little peace wash over her. It seemed that in nothing flat she was parking at the front curb of Martin’s house. One glimpse of the place made her wonder just how many extra people he’d invited for this year’s pre-Thanksgiving blowout. The driveway and turnaround were packed with cars, and she couldn’t afford to get blocked in.

When she opened the front door, she heard Martin singing with the band. Newly hung Christmas lights surrounded doorframes, wound up the staircase, and outlined the windows. Unfamiliar voices echoed throughout as loud laughter greeted her. Hannah slid out of her coat and hung it in the hall closet. She spoke to various people she knew as she went to check on Lissa and Kevin. The children were surrounded by other kids, all of whom barely glanced up from their video games. She refused to go look at the cover of the game. Her vote was to limit their watching television or playing video games to G-rated ones and only once a week, but she stayed out of Martin’s decisions on such matters.

Content that things were running smoothly, albeit not in a manner she would have chosen, Hannah went to the kitchen to check on Laura and found her restocking a platter of food. “Hey, you’re back. How was it?”

Hannah popped a grape into her mouth. “A young woman I’ve worked with for a long time is in the early stages of labor in her first pregnancy.”

Laura threw an empty plastic platter in the trash. “Don’t you usually stay when you’re on call and someone’s in labor?”

Feeling the familiar pull of her many worlds, she aimed not to let her voice share too much. “Yeah, but Martin forgot I was on call, so I hated to be gone the whole evening.” The music came to a stop, and she nodded to the other room. “Speaking of which, it sounds like they’re taking a break, so I’m going to let him know I’m here.” Hannah weaved her way through the crowd of mostly strangers until she met up with Martin. “Hi.”

He smiled. “Well, hello. Fancy meeting you here.”

“Uh, yeah, it’s fancy all right.”

He held up his hands in surrender. “Laura’s doing. She put up the lights before anyone arrived today.” Placing his hand on her back, he directed her toward the kitchen. “But it does look good.”

Hannah noticed a petite woman with shoulder-length blond hair watching them. The woman stepped forward, wearing shiny high heels, a gently molded, knee-length skirt, and matching cashmere sweater. It was the type of outfit Martin would like to see Hannah wearing, modest with a twist of alluring. But it wasn’t modest by Plain standards, and she didn’t think she could ever dress in that manner on a regular basis. Wearing fancy clothes was hard enough on very special occasions, although she’d have no problem wearing something alluring in the privacy of their home once they were married and the children were down for the night.

Martin paused and gestured toward the blond woman. “Hannah, I’d like you to meet Amy Clarke. Amy, this is Hannah Lawson.”

Hannah shook her hand. “Hi, Amy, it’s nice to finally meet you. You own the landscape architect business in the same building as Martin, right?”

“Yes, my mom owned it originally, but after I graduated from college, she trained me and then took an early retirement. Martin and I have worked together for a lot of years.” She tilted her head and looked at Martin with obvious admiration. “I’ve been interested in meeting you. Since you’ve been on the scene, he’s easier to convince when he’s wrong and he refuses to work too much.”

“Don’t give her too much credit, Aim. She’s known to bring out the worst in me too.”

Amy shifted her stance. “So, Hannah, are you counting the days until vacation?”

Martin ran his hand up and down Hannah’s back. “She graduates the Friday night before we leave. She can’t help but tally each day.”

Amy laughed.

Martin opened his mouth to say something else, but the phone in Hannah’s pocket rang loudly.

She slid it from her pocket. “Excuse me.”

Martin rolled his eyes. “Speaking of bringing out the worst in me…”

She smiled at him before she pressed the green button. She listened as Dr. Lehman’s answering service told her to come in right away. She said she’d be there as soon as possible and then ended the call. “I’m sorry. I have to go.”

Martin sighed. “Of course you have to leave, because working for no money while disrupting our lives is just right up your ever-altruistic alley.”

The sting of embarrassment was complete. If his aim was to make her pay for having to work today, he’d accomplished it.

“Amy, it was nice to meet you, but I think Martin’s right. I just brought out the worst in him. If you’ll excuse us for a minute, please.”

She took Martin by the hand. They stopped by the closet, and she grabbed her coat before they went out the front door. She closed the door behind them, confident her cheeks were still red with anger. “I’m not the one who forgot I was on call. It’s only reasonable for me to work this holiday weekend if I’m off during Christmas. And if you’d shared your extravagant plans concerning today with me, I’d have reminded you about my schedule.” She jerked her coat on.

“You say the word ‘extravagant’ like this party is something to endure.” He shoved his hands into his pockets and moved to stand at the top of the porch steps. “You know, it’d be really nice if just once you did more than tolerate what I have to offer. Just once, Hannah.”

“And could that be followed up by you not making plans first and telling me second?”

Martin said nothing, and she hated that they’d had so much trouble communicating lately. They’d once shared everything, and when they first started dating…well, actually, they argued and almost broke up before the very first date, but then they talked things out, and she saw a deeper part of who he was. They became closer that night. That’s what they needed—to talk like they used to.

She forced a smile, aching with the things that tore at them. Since the night he’d gone to the hospital with her three weeks ago and had seen her being more than civil with Paul, there had been more stress between them. She’d blown it and done damage, but she would not accept defeat. They’d get past this as well as the news Dr. Lehman had shared, but it wasn’t the right time to tell Martin about that.

He kissed her forehead. “Look, we’ve stumbled on a gap that needs a bridge. You’re right. I am guilty of making decisions first and telling you second. It’s a habit that needs breaking now that I’m part of being a couple. But if I didn’t push, you’d still be living in that cabin, avoiding the lifestyle of the professional and modern world around you. Are you ever going to be ready to let go of the Plain ways and enjoy what’s right in front of you?” He kissed her cheek. “Come on, phone girl, make a choice for us.”

Hannah slid her arms around him, remembering their first kiss. With one connection of their lips, he’d swept loneliness from her, an isolation that was colder than the Arctic and just as secluded. She loved him more than he probably realized, but was the next great movie, blowout party, gaming station, or extravagant vacation so very important?

She kissed his cheek before taking a step back. “Look, I’ve gotta run—should have left fifteen minutes ago. Let’s talk about this later.” She didn’t wait for another kiss as she hurried down the steps. “Bye.”

“Drive safe.” He waited until she was sliding behind the wheel to wave, and then he went inside.