Nina slipped on her jacket, grasped the container of cookies and headed down the street toward El’s. Each time she read something in the Bible, her talk with El came to mind as did Doug’s request for her to visit a new physician. This time she didn’t need the cookies as an excuse, but he loved them and who didn’t enjoy an appreciative fan?
When she pushed his bell, the door flew open, and she faced a young woman she’d never seen before. “Is El in? I’m a neighbor.” She motioned toward her house and waited while the stranger gawked at her a moment before she turned and headed back inside, leaving the door open. “Gramps. Another of your lady friends is here.”
Nina grinned, certain Birdie had hustled over seeing a woman she didn’t know visit El.
El’s chuckle reached her ears as he came through the archway. “Nina. I’m so glad you came.” He pushed open the storm door and she entered. As she did, he eyed the container and his grin grew broader. “And you came bearing gifts.”
“I hope you like them.”
He accepted the container and gave her a playful look. “If they’re sweet, you know I’ll love them.” He motioned for her to sit as he continued past her. “Ginger, can you come here a minute?”
“What?” She ambled in, a scowl growing on her face. “I’m busy.”
He eyed her a moment, and Nina sensed he had sent up a prayer. “I hope you can spare a minute. I’d like you to meet one of my neighbors.”
Ginger shrugged and looked at Nina. “Hi.” She turned away.
Before she could leave, El touched her arm. “Ginger, this is Nina. She lives in the house at the corner.”
“Okay.”
Nina forced a pleasant look. “It’s nice to meet you, Ginger. How long are you visiting?”
Her eyes shifted to El and back as if she were uncertain.
“Ginger will be staying here for a while.” He arched an eyebrow and looked at her.
Ginger squirmed under El’s gaze. “Right. It’s here or jail.”
Her blunt response threw Nina off balance. An appropriate response swirled through her head. “I’m sorry, Ginger, but you have a wonderful grandfather, so the choice was a good one.”
Ginger pressed her lips together though a faint grin sneaked to the edge of her lips. “I suppose you’re right.” She turned to El. “Is this necessary, Gramps?”
He opened the container and offered her a cookie.
Ginger eyed the treats a moment, and then took one. “I don’t mean to be rude, but I know if I didn’t tell you, Gramps would.”
Another challenge. She sought a response and decided honesty was best. “Sometimes getting things out in the open is better than skirting the issue or lying. I’ve skirted the truth often, Ginger, and I want to tell you it’s caused me more grief than I can explain.”
Somehow what she said caught Ginger’s attention. This time she gave up the battle and let her grin come through. “You sound like my grandpa. He says things like that.”
“That’s because it’s true. I’ve spent my life hiding something about myself that’d kept me from moving forward and being happy.”
Ginger backed up and dropped into an easy chair. “Really?”
“Really. In fact, that’s part of the reason I dropped by today, hoping I’d catch El alone so I could talk with him about it.”
“What’s the other reason?” Ginger narrowed her eyes.
“The last time I saw him, he asked me to come over because he had something to talk about.”
El chuckled and settled into his recliner. “I don’t need to say much now, Nina. You’ve just opened the door to why I wanted to see you. I watched you and Doug together at Angie’s wedding, and I recognized two people who were in love, and yet I could still see a kind of hesitation in your behavior. Something unsettled you. Only a faint hint of it, but I’ve seen it too often. It’s like the day I gave you Margie’s Bible.”
“You gave her Grandma’s Bible? Why?” Ginger’s voice had an edge.
Nina’s head jerked. “Ginger, if you’d like your grandmother’s Bible, I’d be happy to give it to you. I’ve read so much of it and—”
“No.” Ginger shook her head. “I was just surprised. Gramps always kept that Bible beside his bed. It was as if he kept a little of Grandma with him.”
“That’s true, Ginger.” Nostalgia filled El’s face. “But I’ve begun to heal, and I thought your grandma would like someone to read it who really needed to learn about Jesus.”
“You weren’t a Christian?” Ginger’s jaw sagged.
“A very watery one at one time, but the water had dried up and so had I.”
Ginger nodded as if she understood. “Gramps is right. I have a Bible. I just don’t read it anymore. I fell for a guy with a dark past. I let him drag me down with him.” She shook her head. “I hate talking about it.”
Nina understood and resisted questions. Ginger would talk more when she was ready, just as she’d learned to do.
“Are you ready for this, El?”
“Sure am, but only if you’re ready to talk with an old geezer like me.”
“El, I’ve told you many times. A wise old geezer like you. You’re filled with more wisdom than anyone I know.”
He grinned, while she gritted her teeth, wanting to hold back the story she’d come to tell, and yet she could see it served even more purpose with Ginger there. She eased her back against the sofa cushion and drew in a breath. She started from the beginning and spilled the details into the space between them, one that had been silent except for her voice. “And then I met Doug, a man who God meant to be a tremendous father and a good husband. But, El, I am caught with my situation.”
“You have a situation, but are you really caught in it?”
“Not as much as I was. I finally confessed what held me back from falling in love and being a wife.”
“Doug didn’t walk out on you, did he?” El tilted his head as he waited for her response.
“You know he didn’t. But he asked me questions and made me think.”
El leaned closer. “Questions?”
An ache grew in her chest. “He wanted to know how many doctors I’d talked with. I said one.” She shook her head. “So he asked me to have a second opinion.”
“And that’s frightening, isn’t it?”
She nodded, her gaze sweeping across Ginger’s face, filled with her own pain.
Forcing her gaze from Ginger, she sorted through her thoughts. “Yes, but it made me act. I went online and researched. I learned some things that helped me to understand Doug’s question. Medical advances happen daily, and doctors do make mistakes. My problem is very similar to another female issue, and that one has a new surgical procedure that helps, but...”
El’s gaze grew tender. “But what if you get your hopes up, and your first doctor was correct.”
She nodded, a ragged breath tearing from her lungs.
“But, Nina...” Ginger’s voice shot past her. “What if your first doctor was wrong? What if you can have a child? What if you turn down love that would be wonderful just because of a what-if?”
“Smart girl, Ginger.” Pride rose in El’s voice. “Those are good questions. And here’s another thought. My Margie had some kind of female problem, and the doctor warned her that it was a good possibility she would never have a child.”
“Really, Gramps?”
He gave Ginger a nod, and then shifted his gaze back to Nina. “She kept that a secret for a short time, but I sensed something was wrong. I didn’t bug her. Margie wasn’t one you wanted to bug.”
Ginger chuckled. “Grandma liked life to run her way.”
El gave Ginger a watch-what-you-say look. “One day, Margie told me, and I said I loved her for her and I reminded her the Lord was in charge. He would decide.” He chuckled. “I was right. Within a year, Margie was expecting our first daughter, and a couple years later we had our second.” He smacked his knees and rose. “See what I mean. We’re not in charge.”
“So I should trust that Doug is telling me the truth. He will still love me if I go through with another doctor and learn the same thing. No babies.”
El’s expression answered the question.
“That’s what I thought, but I wanted validation, El. I value your opinion. Very much.”
Ginger scooted to the edge of her seat. “So you’ll get the second opinion?”
Nina nodded. “I’ve looked up a few doctors, and I’ll call for an appointment as soon as I get past Thanksgiving.”
El crossed to her side. “That’s the best thing to do, Nina, and I’ll pray the answer blesses you, no matter what it is.”
“Me, too.” Ginger nodded.
Ginger’s offer startled her. “Thank you.” Nina rose and took a step toward the door. “Ginger, I’m happy to listen anytime, and, El, thank you so much.”
He opened his arms, and she stepped in and accepted his hug. Outside she had a bounce to her step she hadn’t had earlier. Her decision was made and El had validated it. The truth was what she needed. She would learn to live with it.
Nina opened the oven and basted the turkey, golden brown, the way she liked it. She eyed the wall clock, and her pulse skipped. Her mother and stepfather would arrive soon. She looked heavenward for the nth time and asked the Lord to help her deal with her mother’s criticisms.
The potatoes boiled in the large kettle and she turned down the burner. She’d prepared well. The vegetable casserole was already baked and ready to slip into the microwave for a warm-up, and she’d done the same with her corn casserole, one of her favorites. She grinned, picturing Doug, who’d insisted he would take care of dessert.
Her cell phone’s ringtone began, and she crossed to the table and grasped it. “Doug. Are you—”
“We’re just leaving. Kimmy’s still not feeling well, but Roseanne is pretty good. I guess it’s a trade-off.”
“Poor Kimmy. I thought once she’d adjusted to home she’d be okay.”
“Me, too. I think she needs to see a doctor, but Roseanne can’t take her so I’ll suggest Roseanne make an appointment for next week. If she needs a ride, I’ll take her.”
“Good idea. My mother isn’t here yet but I expect her anytime now. I’ll see you soon.” Their call ended and she returned to the last-minute details to burn off her anxiety.
As she closed the oven, a horn reverberated from the driveway. She hurried to the front, managing a pleasant expression. When she opened the door her mother had reached the porch with her stepfather on her heels. “Mother, you made it. How was the trip?”
“As good as can be expected.” She stood a moment scanning the front of the house.
Nina nodded to Howard and waited to hear her mother’s evaluation.
“I thought it would be bigger.” Her mother arched a brow and grabbed the doorjamb as she made her way inside.
“It’s big enough for me, Mom. One person doesn’t use a lot of space.”
“One person doesn’t. Too bad. I think women should have a husband, but then I guess you have other ideas.”
She squelched her rebuttal and avoided agreeing with her. The agree-with-her technique was meant to be used at selected times. It was the best way to stop an argument. “Have a seat. Dinner’s in the oven. Would you like some coffee or tea?”
“What brand of coffee?”
Nina ignored her mother’s expression. “I have a coffeemaker with individual cups. Would you like to see what I have?”
“Never mind. Give me something bold.” She flashed a look at Howard. “He’ll drink anything.”
Howard’s lengthy sigh whispered in the air. “Anything.”
She returned to the kitchen, grateful for the break to regroup and pray for her patience. With the two coffee mugs in hand, she joined them and sank into a chair across from them. “How have you been?”
Her mother shrugged. “Nothing earthshaking. The question is how are you?”
“Good. Very good. In fact, I have some friends joining us for dinner. I hope you don’t mind.”
Her mother’s eyes widened. “Friends? Why would you—”
“Because it’s Thanksgiving, Mom, and I’m thankful for the friendship I have with Doug and his family.”
“Doug?” She flashed a look at Howard again. “Who’s this Doug?”
“A neighbor. I met him shortly after I moved here. They had an end-of-summer block party, and—”
“Block party? Goodness.” She snorted. “This is a small town. I’ve never seen a block party in—”
“Big cities don’t always have them, I suppose, but it was a wonderful way for me to meet my neighbors. I’m not a coffee klatch type person, but I know if I need help where I can go.”
“Why do you need help, Nina? You’ve always been very independent. You don’t listen to anyone’s advice. For example, when you lost that first baby—”
Patience flew out the window and no technique could stop her. “Mother, that was four years ago. Do we have to relive that again?”
“I only meant—”
“I know what you meant.” Nina forced her fists open. “You enjoy reminding me of—”
Noise at the door saved her from herself.
“They’re here.” She held up a finger and hurried across the room. “Come in. You’re right on time.” She gave Doug a look she hoped he understood.
He gave her a wink and shifted for Kimmy’s entrance, but instead of her bounding inside, she walked in, a look on her face that caused Nina to be concerned. She bent over and pressed her cheek to the child’s. “Are you feeling any better?”
Kimmy shook her head, and then noticed the company. Her eyes shifted to Nina’s.
“This is my mother and stepfather, Kimmy.” She eyed them again and gave a timid wave.
She’d never seen Kimmy that shy and her concern rose. She looked at Doug, holding the door open for Roseanne, and he only lifted a brow.
Roseanne swung in on crutches and Doug followed. With the three inside the door, she motioned toward her family. “Mother. Howard. These are my friends, Doug, his sister, Roseanne, who you can see is recuperating from leg injuries, and Roseanne’s daughter, Kimmy.”
She turned to them. “This is my mother, Alice, and my stepfather, Howard.”
They exchanged greetings, though her mother and Howard sat without making an effort to stand to welcome them.
Doug faltered to a stop. “I forgot to bring in the dessert.” He held up his index finger and retreated through the doorway.
Roseanne settled in an easy chair with an ottoman while Kimmy sat beside her on the floor. Before she could offer drinks, Doug returned carrying two pies and something in a paper bag. She took drink orders and followed Doug into the kitchen.
As soon as he set the pies on the counter, he turned and drew her into his arms. “You don’t look happy.”
She released a long breath. “It’s tedious already, but I’m doing okay. Hopefully with you here, she will soften up a bit.”
“I’m sorry, Nina. You don’t need any added stress in your life.” He drew her closer, his lips lowering to her mouth.
Since she’d explained her inability to have children, each kiss became more precious, a validation that he hadn’t abandoned her. His request entered her mind and her thoughtful talk with El. Ginger, of all people, had said something that touched her. What if the doctor was wrong? She’d convinced herself that never was reality. Never left out God’s hand on her life.
“What can I do to help?”
Doug’s voice drew her back and made her smile. His willingness to do anything came naturally to him, and she loved it. “How are you at carving turkeys?”
“A pro.” He chuckled.
“I’ll take that answer with a grain of salt...or even a grain of sage, but you’ll do a better job than I will.”
She opened the oven and he brought out the golden-brown bird and set it on a cutting board while she slipped the corn casserole inside to warm it. After she popped the veggie casserole into the microwave, she hurried back into the living room, hearing her mother ask questions about Roseanne’s accident and the whereabouts of Roseanne’s husband. She winced, seeing Roseanne’s uneasiness as she said they had separated years earlier.
Grateful that her mother didn’t ask more, she was even more grateful she’d interrupted the conversation. “We’re finishing up in the kitchen. The food will be on the table in a few minutes.”
“Can I help?” Kimmy rose from the floor and crossed to her.
“If you want to. Can you carry things to the table?”
Kimmy nodded, too quiet in comparison to her usual enthusiasm.
She set out the cranberry relish she’d made and a tray of relishes for Kimmy to carry into the dining room while she slipped the dinner rolls into the oven. The corn casserole had warmed, and the microwave beeped as the veggies were finished.
Doug filled a platter with turkey and she grabbed a masher and attacked the drained potatoes. Soon the food was ready and she invited everyone to the dining room table. Once everyone had gathered around, she shifted her attention to Kimmy. “Would you like to say the blessing?”
Kimmy nodded, and from her peripheral vision, she noted the shocked look on her mother’s face. Everyone folded their hands except her mother and Howard as Kimmy began the prayer. “Come, Lord Jesus, be our guest and let these gifts to us be blessed. Amen.”
Again Roseanne, Doug and she reiterated the amen though her mother and Howard continued to remain silent.
“This dining room is a bit small, wouldn’t you say?”
Time for her technique. “Yes, it is for a large group, but we seem to fit just fine.”
Her mother looked away and sliced a sliver from her turkey.
Though Roseanne had been quiet, she accidentally helped Nina’s plight with her mother. “The turkey’s excellent, Nina. It’s moist and such a good flavor. Do you do something special?”
The questioned brightened Nina’s day. “Nothing but baste it often.”
“Well, it’s delicious.”
She grinned at Roseanne. “Thanks, but maybe it’s Doug’s carving.”
Doug smiled at her and dug into the corn casserole. “Now, this is excellent.”
Nina’s spirits rose. Despite her mother’s scrutinizing, hearing compliments relaxed her. She knew her mother wouldn’t try her negativity on the company.
Kimmy only picked at her food, so unlike her, and Nina’s concern deepened as she watched. When she asked to be excused, she beckoned to Kimmy to come to her and felt her cheeks and forehead. Heat penetrated her hand.
Roseanne noticed. “Does she have a fever?”
“I think so.” Nina pulled her hands way. “I can take her temperature.”
“I’m guessing it’s the flu.” Roseanne shrugged and, with a grimace, shifted her leg, obviously still in pain.
With the meal concluded—and enjoyed from everyone’s comments—Nina suggested saving dessert for later. Doug and her mother rose and began to put away the food, so she sneaked off for a moment with Kimmy to take her temperature.
When she read the results, her concern turned to worry. The thermometer read a hundred and three degrees. She found Doug in the kitchen, and after she told him he said he would warn Roseanne.
Nina struggled to concentrate on the conversation, distracted by Kimmy’s health. Her mother’s acerbic comments lessened, and she fell into conversation with Doug about his work and Roseanne’s situation. Nina was even more surprised to hear her mother talk about her father’s illness and death. Since her mother said little about those days, hearing her speak in a positive light about her dad touched Nina’s heart.
She placed her hand on Kimmy’s forehead to check the heat again, and this time her mother noticed. “Nina, you seem to be preoccupied with Kimmy. It’s such a shame you don’t have children of your own.”
Though the comment might have slipped by the others as a remark from a caring mother, Nina saw it as another way to belittle her. The dig bit into her self-esteem once again and dampened her spirit.
Doug leaned back and gave her an understanding look before addressing her mother. “You know some women enjoy waiting to have a family until the time is right. Who knows what the future holds for Nina? I know she could make an amazing mother. She has lots of love to give to a child. Ask Kimmy.”
Kimmy nestled closer to her, lifting a faint smile.
Her mother’s comment dropped to the floor while Kimmy’s reaction sent her to the sky.
Nina watched her mother’s eyes shift from Doug to Kimmy to her, and she said nothing. Doug had come to her aid and she loved him for that. Loved him for many things.
Despite being store-bought, the dessert was a hit—a pumpkin and a French silk pie. Each took a slice of their favorite and Doug tried both. He’d brought along a can of real whipped cream, and the pie and coffee finished off a successful meal.
Though Roseanne’s focus turned to Kimmy, she began to look achy. Doug noticed the situation and rose. “I think I need to get this patient back home, and we can take a good look at this young lady.” He scooped Kimmy into his arms, and despite her illness, she giggled. The sound delighted Nina, and even her mother made a kind comment.
After the others slipped out the door, Doug leaned in and squeezed her hand. “I’ll see you later. I want to get them home, and I’m as worried as you are about Kimmy. I don’t think this is the flu.”
“I agree. I think Roseanne is beginning to realize Kimmy’s sicker than she suspected.”
From his expression, she knew he wanted to kiss her goodbye, but with her parents watching from the sofa, he winked and hurried to unlock the car.
When she closed the door, her mother gave her a questioning look. “Are you not telling me something?”
“Like what?” She kept her voice casual, not willing to open her heart.
“You know ‘like what,’ Nina.” A frown edged her face and grew. “This man is more than a nice neighbor. You two have a connection. I watched you through the day with your little looks, and you love that girl, don’t you?”
“Yes, Mom, I do. She’s sweet and fun. Kimmy’s a creative, wonderful child.”
“But it’s not his child, right?” Her frown eased to curiosity.
She nodded. “Right. She’s his sister’s but she’s been alone for years raising Kimmy and Doug is always there for her. He’ll make an amazing father.”
Tension eased from her mother’s face. “He would make a good husband, too. I hope you see that.”
She gave an evasive nod.
“Does he know about your problem?” The lift of her voice communicated her assumption.
But Nina had a response ready. “Yes, he does.”
“Really?” Her pitch arched somewhere between surprise and question. “And he understands.”
“Doug cares about me for me, Mom. And though I believe he will handle it if I can’t carry a child, he suggested I get a second opinion. Medical advances have been made since the last diagnosis.”
Her mother lowered her head and shook it, leaving Nina to wonder what it meant.
“I appreciate his gallantry, but I’m not sure the reality has hit him yet. I don’t want you to get your hopes up, Nina. The doctor seemed confident when he gave you the verdict. What if you go through more doctors and tests, and the first doctor was correct?”
Though her comment sounded negative, Nina witnessed true caring in her mother’s eyes. She opened her mouth to respond but Howard’s voice slipped in first and startled her.
“Alice, what happens if the doctor was wrong, and Nina could have a child? Isn’t it worth the chance?”
At this moment, Nina loved her stepfather. “That’s how I see it, too, Howard. I’ve avoided thinking about it, but I care greatly for Doug, and yes, Mom, I can see him as a wonderful husband. One who would stand by me no matter what. I want to give him a chance to have children with me.”
“I agree. If you are willing to take the chance on being disappointed, then I support your decision. I would be a good grandmother, Nina, although I doubt if you agree.”
“Mom, I don’t know what I think. You and I have butted heads for a long time, and—”
“You were Daddy’s little girl. I was your mother, and I suppose I was jealous.”
Her eyes widened before she could digest what her mother had said. “I had no idea you felt that way, Mom. Lots of girls are Daddy’s little—”
“I suppose their mothers are confident that they are good parents. I didn’t have much of a role model, but I did the best I could. I know I failed in many ways. I wanted you to be perfect so people would know I raised a lovely daughter, but you couldn’t hide your disdain for me, Nina. The more I sensed your feelings, the more I tried to build myself up by—”
“Finding faults with me.” Her chest ached, controlling her emotion. “Mom, I didn’t know. I never suspected. I thought you didn’t like me or that I was a horrible disappointment. You talked about only my flaws, all negatives. I never knew you saw anything positive.”
“My defense. I’m sorry about that. Howard noticed and finally said something and I analyzed my behavior. He was right.”
“But when you arrived you...”
“I slipped into my old self. You know it’s hard to break bad habits, Nina. But now that I have explained, I hope you can understand even if you can’t forgive me.”
She released a stream of air. “I can forgive you. Forgive you with all my heart.” She opened her arms and her mother rose and hugged her for the first time in years.
“But let me bug you again. If you are thinking about this, what do you plan to do?”
“I’m going to find out all I can about my problem. I’ve already done some research and investigated a doctor. But this time I’ll go with ammunition and this time maybe I can find an answer.”
Her mother smiled. “And I’ll keep my fingers crossed.”
“Thank you, Mom. That means the world to me.”
Doug plowed through paperwork in his office, grateful today he didn’t have clients to see since he was distracted, waiting to hear about Kimmy.
After he’d taken Roseanne home and started to leave, she had asked him to stay for a while so he could help with Kimmy while she tried to make arrangements to see a doctor the next day. Roseanne dealt with an answering service, and a while later the doctor finally called. Doug watched her struggle through the conversation. Though Roseanne was grateful that the physician had returned her call, she appeared to struggle to keep an even tone while she begged him to see Kimmy the next day rather than take her to emergency.
Doug agreed. The wait would be forever on Thanksgiving Day and Kimmy had become nauseated and could keep nothing down. Waiting in an emergency room was no place for a sick child.
He offered to drive Roseanne to the appointment, but she called in the morning to say a friend had agreed to drive them to the doctor’s office. And now he waited, his heart in his throat.
His distraction wasn’t only Kimmy. Nina had been on his mind when Kimmy wasn’t. He’d made a quick call to her the past evening to tell her where he was. He longed to talk with her about the Thanksgiving dinner experience, but there wasn’t time. He’d left Roseanne’s late and he’d been in a rush this morning. He’d wait to call until he had news. When his cell phone rang, he grabbed it, his pulse pummeling before he realized the caller was Nina.
“I thought you were Roseanne.”
“You’re upset. What happened last night?”
He filled her in as quickly as he could. “I’m now waiting for Roseanne to call. I don’t know what’s happening at this point.”
“Please let me know and I’ll be praying it’s nothing serious.”
He’d prayed, too, but he continued to worry. “I’ll call you when I hear something.”
After he disconnected, his mind shifted to Nina and her mother. He could understand why their relationship had been strained, and no matter what solution he considered, the situation had a hopeless feeling. Yet he knew better. Something could make a change, but he had yet to think of anything.
Forcing his mind back to his work, he managed to complete a plan of action for one of his clients, and outlined some financial steps for another who wanted to expand his business and his real estate.
When his ringtone jarred him again, he knew it was Roseanne. He hit the talk button and listened, his apprehension growing. “What does that mean? Isn’t meningitis serious?”
“There’s two kinds, according to the doctor, and the tests will tell us which.”
Two kinds. Questions filled his mind but Roseanne’s distress caused him to hold the questions for later. “What can I do to help?”
A sigh breathed across the phone. “I can’t ask my friend to spend much more time here. She’s taking us to the hospital for the tests, but she can’t wait. I’ll need a ride home, hopefully with Kimmy.”
She choked and he recognized the beginning of her tears. “I’ll get there as fast as I can. Where will you be?”
“Probably in the medical building for the blood work and X-rays, but maybe not since you’ll be a while before getting here.”
“I’m not waiting, Roseanne. I’ll talk to my boss, and I’m sure he’ll give me the rest of the day off. I’m not that far.” They hung up and Doug hurried into his boss’s office. His work could wait. He needed to be by Kimmy’s side.
Nina sat in her home office and checked her watch again. She’d thought Doug would call earlier. Time had ticked by and she’d heard nothing. While waiting, she decided to do more research on the diagnosis that explained her inability to carry a child. Doug could be right. New treatments and information were found daily. She’d hoped that something could make a difference, but she’d found nothing specific that gave her hope.
When she clicked on another link, she came to the section on diagnosis. She scanned the options and spotted the test she’d had—laparoscopy. She read the article and words jumped out at her. The test was only 60 percent accurate. The doctor had never told her that.
Knowing internet facts could be wrong, she found another article, one from a reputable hospital, and she was certain the information would be accurate. Her heart skipped as she read. Only 45 to 67 percent of suspected lesions were confirmed as accurate. Twenty percent found that the positive finding in laparoscopy would be incorrect.
Her heart soared. Hope she’d given up on for years could be renewed. Maybe, just maybe, she was one of that 20 percent.
Overwhelmed by her findings, she rose from the computer and wandered into the kitchen. It was too early to eat, but her stomach had rebelled since she’d begun her wait. She searched the fridge and found a couple of apples in the fruit drawer. She withdrew the smaller one, cut it into pieces and headed to the living room. As soon as she popped a piece of apple in her mouth, her cell phone rang. She dug into her pants pocket.
“I got off work early to give Roseanne a hand. She’ll need a ride home. They’re at the hospital for some tests. The doctor thinks Kimmy has meningitis.”
The diagnosis wrenched air from her lungs, and all thoughts of her research faded from her mind, filled by Kimmy’s diagnosis. “That’s serious, isn’t it?”
“Roseanne said there are two kinds. The tests are supposed to determine which.”
“Doug, is it okay if I go, too? I can’t sit here. Can I meet you there?”
“Please, Nina. I know you love Kimmy. I’m not sure where she’ll be and I don’t know what will happen after the tests, but you can ask where she is at the information desk. That’s what I’ll have to do.”
“See you soon. I’m on my way.” She hit End and pulled her coat from the closet. Nothing could keep her from being there with Doug. Racked with concern, she headed for the door, then gathered her wits and returned to grab her purse before she darted to the car.
She drove to the end of Lilac Circle, turned right and then left onto Hickory Street and right onto King Street. Her heart hammered as she followed the highway and once she crossed Shiawassee, she knew she was almost there.
After parking, she made her way inside, located the first information desk and received directions to the waiting room where she hoped to see Doug. To her relief, he was there.
When she stepped into the room, he rose and she rushed into his arms, anxiety writhing through her body. “Have you heard anything?”
“Roseanne is with her. We’re still waiting to hear the test results. They did blood work and X-rays. And Roseanne said they might do another test. It was PCR or something like that.”
“What’s that for?”
He shrugged. “Roseanne said the doctor suspects viral meningitis which is less serious, so they’re checking for viruses to determine the best treatment. If it’s not viral, it might be bacterial, and she’ll need a spinal tap. That’s more serious.”
“No, Doug. Please, Lord, let it be viral only.” She lowered her head, her mind spinning.
“I’m a knot of nerves, too. But I really feel for Roseanne. She’s so scared and blaming herself.”
Her head drew back. “Why? That doesn’t make sense. If anybody’s to blame, it’s you and me. We’ve been with her for months.” The possibility devastated her. “But what did we do wrong?”
“Nina, no one’s to blame. People get sick. Bacteria is everywhere and viruses fill the air. We can’t fix that. Let’s wait and see what the tests show.”
He backed toward his chair and patted the one next to him. “Sit with me, and we’ll wait. We can’t do much else. I can go down to the room or you could, and see what Roseanne knows, but I think she would have told us if she knew anything more.” She nodded, too anxious to think of anything better to do. She sank into the chair and leaned back her head as she drew in a breath.
“I ran out of the house so fast, I almost left my purse.”
He chuckled and snapped his fingers. “We need a distraction. Tell me what happened after I left on Thanksgiving. How did it go with your mother?”
“Amazing. I was anxious to tell you, and then with all this I forgot.” She related the change in her mother—and in herself. “I think it was a step forward, Doug. It’s not perfect, I suppose, but we made strides. Now I understand partly what happened, but I can’t picture my mother jealous of my dad. She always came across as confident in her actions. As if she were always right and the rest of the world was wrong.”
“People sometimes do the opposite of what their real feelings dictate. It’s a cover-up. If they can’t fool themselves about their feelings, they can fool other people by their behavior. Have you ever seen a guilty person?”
She grinned. “Yes, and they do everything to hide their guilt. You’re right.”
“I’m guessing that’s what your mother did. It would have been hard for her to admit she was jealous of her own husband.”
“You’re right.” The idea worked through her mind, and she took one more step forward. “I need to find ways to develop a relationship with her. It’s been at a standstill for so long.”
“You’ll think of something.” His grin tingled down her spine. She sank into silence, her mind sorting through the past and clearing the cobwebs of confusion that she’d faced for too many years.
Doug slipped his hand into hers and gave it a squeeze. Feeling his nearness and his overpowering effect on her, she sank into a kind of peace. Learning there was a possibility her diagnosis could be wrong would stay buried for now. Kimmy’s health was all-important, and she needed to learn more before she could be confident in the hope she’d felt. She would read more, and then act.
“Mr. Billings.”
Doug jumped, hearing his name. He rose and headed to the desk. In a moment, he turned back to her. “Roseanne said I can come to the room. The doctor is there.”
He paused a moment and she knew what bothered him. “Doug, you go. I’ll wait here and pray it’s good news.”
He gave her a questioning look until she rose and gave him a quick kiss. “I prefer to wait. You’re family. I’m not.” But oh how she wished she were.
He gave her another look before turning toward the door and hurrying out.
She folded her hands, her gaze clinging to the empty doorway. Though prayer was still new for her, she’d been surprised how easily it came with each prayer. She bowed her head and prayed the Lord’s blessing on Kimmy. That’s all that mattered.