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Averell’s mind spun from many things as the sway of riding a horse lulled her into a drowsy mood.
The death of her father brought heavy clouds of sadness. The sudden and startling appearance of her mother the queen—not to mention recently finding out her mother still lived—brought queasiness and fear. And the knowledge of the task she’d been ordered to undertake unless she too was killed brought dark hopelessness that gripped her chest with bands so tight she could hardly breathe. Yet each time she glanced over at Quinn who rode beside her, all of those things seemed more manageable as long as he was with her.
“Doing all right?” he asked, the sound of his voice at odds with the hush of the night.
“As well as can be expected under the circumstances,” she replied and kept her gaze focused on her horse’s ears. She lapsed back into her musings.
After the kiss she’d shared with him that had further cemented the bond they enjoyed, Quinn had sprung into action. He’d cautioned her to remain with her father’s body, to prepare it the best she could for burial and to take whatever possessions she wished to keep, and then he’d vanished into the forest.
While he was gone a centaur had come upon her, injured and limping from having a back hoof caught in a hunter’s trap. Unable to stand seeing another living being suffer, she’d helped free him and wrapped a torn strip from her skirts about his injury to quell the bleeding. In gratitude, the centaur promised he would help her in return if she needed him in the future. She had only to call upon his name— Tumius—and he would come no matter where she was.
Quinn returned an hour later with two gray dappled horses which had black legs and black manes and tails. He’d also brought a few members of what appeared to be his original hunting party. If he questioned the discarded hunter’s trap lying upon the ground, he said nothing.
How could he have brought those men and the horses, when they should have all gone back to their own kingdom?
Too tired and confused to question him, she let the men—who remained silent except to murmur their condolences—dig a stout grave and then commit her father’s body into the ground. While she would have preferred the burial to have been closer to their home, she couldn’t shake the feeling the enchanted tree would no longer feature into her life. Would she ever see her home again? Mayhap it didn’t matter in light of what she’d been pressed to do. The dagger that had been used to kill her father, she’d taken. Perhaps it would prove handy in the future, especially if it still retained its poison. As soon as they’d covered the grave with the freshly dug earth, the men had left the area as quickly as they’d come.
“Do I even want to know how you managed this?” she asked of Quinn as she’d gestured to the final resting spot of her father. Later, she would fashion an ornament of sorts and return to lay it on the dirt.
“Probably not.” He’d grinned and tiny curls of pleasure erupted in her lower belly. “Someday I’ll explain. I promise.” Then he’d helped her onto the back of one of the horses, saying nothing as she settled into the saddle that was most assuredly not meant for a female, while her skirts rose to show a good portion of her legging-clad lower limbs. It was both scandalous and exhilarating. “We have a few hours of riding ahead.”
The night wore on, and with every passing mile, her eyelids drooped further. Would that she’d fall into blessed sleep and find a cessation of the thoughts chasing around her mind. Quinn kept his own counsel, and for that she was grateful. Truly, there was nothing to say at the moment while her life crumbled around her.
When the lavender and pink and golden light of dawn glimmered on the horizon, they halted. Quinn dismounted. He came to her horse and laid a hand on her leg, gently shaking her fully awake.
“We’ve arrived.” Though his voice sounded as weary as she felt, he gave her a bright smile that crinkled the skin at the corners of his eyes.
“You came a long way with a hunting party.” Averell swung her right leg over the pommel and when she slid from the saddle, his hands on her waist guided her down.
He didn’t release her even when her feet found purchase on the ground. “The search for the white stag is ever elusive.” Quinn tugged her against him with a low chuckle. “Though what I found on that outing instead is infinitely more agreeable.”
Heat fired in her cheeks and her heart squeezed. “I’m glad we met.”
“Fated to meet,” he murmured and brushed his lips over hers. When he pulled away, he slipped an arm about her shoulders and drew her to the edge of the hill they’d stopped upon. “Behold the kingdom of Annanvale.”
They’d come to the edge of the kingdom. Through the trees and at the top of a distant hill, a castle loomed through the clouds. The gray stone of its exterior reflected the colors of the sunrise and lent it an air of mystery and magic. Turrets and towers topped with slate shingles rose into the sky, while water in a moat around the bottom of the hill glimmered in the awakening sun.
“It’s beautiful.” In the far distance behind the structure, a lake sparkled. The lands as far as she could see were sprinkled with small dwellings and fields filled with growing crops. Here and there, white and black dots of sheep moved. “It’s so peaceful.”
“We labor hard to make certain Annanvale remains that way.” He left her side as the horses contented themselves with munching on the lush grasses on the hilltop. “Averell, the time for frank discussion is upon us.” The somberness in his tone brought her head up.
“Are you well?” Anxiety clawed at her stomach. “After everything, I couldn’t bear it if you were to leave me, too.”
“Do not stress yourself. I am hale and hearty.” The space between them stretched until he was more than a five feet away. “I do not plan to leave so soon.”
“Good.” She focused on the horse she’d ridden. Her bow still hung over the pommel—the bow she used to hunt. The weight of the impossible task pressed down on her, and she stifled the sob that rose in her throat. “All my life I was taught to kill out of necessity—for food, clothing or to sell the same for coin.” Slowly, she shook her head. “I am not certain I can assassinate someone, kill an innocent person for someone else’s whim.”
“I can understand that.”
“Yet... what am I to do? I don’t wish to die before my life has truly started,” she closed her statement on a whisper.
“Everyone has a choice, sweeting.” His pause stretched out long. Finally, he faced her and sighed. “However, if up to me, I’d like the prince to remain alive, for Charming is my brother. His name is Henry, actually.” Quinn gestured to the castle. “That is my home.”
What was he on about? She gasped and moved toward her horse. “You lied to me.” Her father had been right all along. The betrayal slammed into her gut with the force of a punch.
“No.” He held up his hands. His words tumbled over themselves. “I didn’t tell you everything. We’ve only met. There wasn’t time. Surely you can agree. And it wasn’t as if you revealed your true parentage either. Daughter of the evil queen?”
Heat slapped at her cheeks. “While that is true, in my defense, I had recently discovered it myself.” Averell released a frustrated breath. “And no, there hasn’t been time for everything. Not even time to grieve.” Another sob climbed her throat. It was all too much. “Perhaps there never will be now.” How unfair her life, when it had just become interesting, no longer belonged to her.
“You cannot think like that,” he cautioned in a low voice, but he didn’t come toward her.
Shock rolled through her as what he’d said sank into her consciousness and past the grief still numbing her mind. “You are a prince.” It wasn’t a question. All this time she’d been entertaining—kissing! —a spare prince. He was royalty and she was a commoner... well, even that was muddled at this point.
A near-hysterical laugh broke from her throat. I’m a princess in a weird, convoluted, horrible way.
“Yes, unfortunately I am, and that is why I was able to call upon my fellows so readily.” A self-depreciating laugh escaped him. “They are my bodyguards I suppose you can say, my security force, and they are almost always with me.” He shook his head, took a few steps toward her. “I hate it, but my father insists. However, palace life isn’t for me and I spend as much time outside those hated walls as I can.”
“Which explains why you’ve been prowling the woods.”
Another laugh left him, more forced this time. “Yes, a bit.” He shrugged. “I’m trying to use my power, my royal influence, to make a difference where it means the most—with the people. Meeting their needs and listening to their problems. Helping to make an impact in their lives and show them rulers aren’t all vile.”
“That is a noble endeavor.” Then another thought occurred to her, and an ache formed around her heart. “I imagine you are popular with married as well as eligible ladies. Once they catch sight of you with trimmed whiskers and in full court dress, they undoubtedly fall at your feet for a chance of your favor.”
This time Quinn’s laughter was genuine and the rich sound of it rippled over her skin with awareness. “Perhaps. I pay no attention to such things.”
“Your father wishes you wed, I’ll wager.” Fathers always did.
“The subject has come up a few times. Until recently I’d never met a woman I deemed worthy of such a long term commitment.” Though a trace of redness crept up his neck. He tugged at his collar. “Above and beyond what I’ve told you, there is more.”
Averell rolled her eyes. “I am not certain how many more fantastical tales I can hear tonight.”
“I ask that you suspend disbelief for this next bit... or focus on your belief in magic—on its good.” His swallow was audible as the sun rose slowly behind him. “My brother and I were cursed as small children. We had played too close to a fairy witch’s domain and she took exception to it, especially when we trampled her flower beds.” He stepped closer. A couple of feet separated them. “Due to the curse, we are both wolf shifters.”
She gaped. Had she heard him correctly? So what her mother had said was true? “A wolf shifter? Does that mean—”
“Yes.” He nodded, interrupting her. “I am a wolf. Each night I shift into the form of that animal and run over the earth on the hunt.”
Cold fear trickled down her spine. She darted to her horse and yanked her bow from the pommel. “Do you kill while you are in that form?” Her hand shook and she tried to exert control over herself.
“I do.”
“For joy or for survival?”
He heaved out a breath. “Yes, on both counts.” A muscle twitched in his jaw as he searched for words.
Averell didn’t give him a chance to speak. “Do you only hunt and kill other animals?”
The horses danced and soft whickers of alarm split the sudden, heavy silence.
Quinn bowed his head. “I have killed humans or other beings on occasion.” He raised his head and met her gaze. She gasped when his eyes appeared the same amber color of the eyes she’d seen in the forest. No wonder they were familiar. “When I’m the wolf, my human part is helpless to discern the difference, especially if I cannot wrestle back control. It only knows that it must hunt, and my wolf’s voice in my head is sometimes demanding.”
It was true. He was a wolf in man’s clothing. Quickly, she drew an arrow from the quiver on her back, nocked it into the bowstring and pulled it backward. “Stay away from me. I want no part of a cursed being, no matter how much I might admire you in this form.” Her heartbeat pounded so hard it was a wonder he didn’t comment upon it.
“Well, at least you’ve admitted you find me pleasing. That is something.” He smiled and she tamped down on the urge to return the gesture.
Damn him for being so charming.
He continued and she didn’t relax her posture. “So then, is this the end of us?” Disappointment shadowed his eyes even as he curled his hands into fists. “I thought you might accept me as I am, that what we share was enough to overlook the horror I endure each night.”
Her doubt wavered. She held her bottom lip between her teeth, but she didn’t lower her arrow. It was not his fault he’d been cursed to walk the earth like this. He had to find a way to live despite it, find his own piece of happiness. Averell sighed. Perhaps she wasn’t the only one grappling with an impossible situation. “Will you shift now?”
“No. I have already appeased that side of myself tonight.”
“Good.” She nodded, but another swath of fear shot down her spine.
“Tell me why you are so afraid of wolves. Perhaps I can alleviate that anxiety,” he suggested in a soft voice, but he didn’t move from his spot. “Show you wolves are not the horrors you’ve come to believe.”
She lowered her arrow slightly. “As a child, I was once chased through the forest, cornered by a wolf just after sunset.”
“Where was your father?”
“Chopping wood. I’d wandered off. He didn’t hear my screams...” She shook her head with the remembrance. “The wolf leapt on top of me, knocked me to the ground. He pressed me to the earth.” Fear clawed at her throat. “At times, I can still feel his hot breath on my face, see his bared teeth in my mind’s eye. His open jaws gaped over my neck.” She forced a hard swallow. “I thought I would die. I couldn’t cry out for his weight on my chest.” Her hands shook and she lowered her bow further. “I waited for him to tear out my throat.”
“What happened?”
“Another wolf howled in the distance. My attacker whined and then he bounded away.” Never would she forget the intensity of his silver eyes or the sudden cease in pressure when he’d removed his paws from her shoulders.
“Ah.” Quinn nodded. “He was called by his alpha. They were undoubtedly hunting in a pack and had probably made a significant kill.”
“You... you do not have a pack?” Would it make it easier to know he didn’t? Was one wolf better than several?
“No.” He shook his head. “I am not a full-blooded wolf and therefore unacceptable to natural wolves in the area. I have my brother, and even then, we do not run or hunt together.” His Adam’s apple bobbed with a swallow. Resignation shadowed his expression. “I am... alone most of the time, neither accepted by the beasts or humans once they realize, or I tell them, what I am.”
Her heart squeezed at his desolate tone. She well knew what it was like to live life without others surrounding her. “Time moves slowly when one has no one to talk to, no one who understands,” she whispered.
“Yes.”
Perhaps they weren’t as different as she’d assumed. Yet, he was a wolf part of his life. How could she contemplate any sort of future with such a man? He might attack with no warning while she slept... Another sob climbed her throat, this one borne of despair. Why had he ever crossed her path, made her feel what she did if nothing would come of it?
“I once thought magic was a force for good, something that could be used to bring hope and peace to others, to change circumstances, but now, after the events of this night, I can see that it is quite evil. It has no place in my life.”
Quinn advanced on her position. “It’s all in how you perceive it, fair Averell. Magic does what the creator wishes it to do. It is a power like any other; it cannot work of its own accord.” He held her gaze. His had brightened to amber. “We all have both dark and light within us. The side we feed is the one that wins. Remember that as you contemplate your parentage. If what I am scares you, what you could be should terrify as well.”
Fear tingled down her spine. “It does. I cannot—will not—become what my mother is.”
“At least you recognize that. It is a start.” He came closer. “What a person is does not define them. Their actions can do that.”
“Like what you do when you’re the beast?” She narrowed her eyes. How could she trust him when he’d kept such a secret? “What else haven’t you shared?”
“Only time will tell, I suppose.” Though his grin tugged at the corners of his mouth, the effect pulled at her chest.
Bastard.
Perhaps it would be easier on them both if they parted ways now. Obviously, they were on separate sides of the issue of her ultimatum. They could never end the matter peacefully. Averell lifted her bow into place and quickly fired off a shot. It landed between his legs in the grass. “Next time I won’t miss. Be gone with you.” Her chin trembled. As much as she liked him and no matter how he made her feel, she refused to break his heart if she decided to go through with the task her mother had put to her... in order to spare her own life. He deserved to live, to find happiness. “Run as the wolf if you must, but leave me alone. Ask fate to send someone else to you.”