FREJA GENTLY TOUCHES the spreading bruise above my eye, and I sense what she is about to do and shake my head. If she heals me, they’ll know what she is.
Let me take the pain away; I’ll leave the surface abrasion and bruise as they are. They won’t be able to see what I’ve done. A gentle warmth inside me spreads, and the headache that jars with each bump on the road is soon gone. My thoughts start to feel clearer.
Thank you.
Anyway, if they scan me, they’ll know what I am soon enough, she adds, and there is dark fear twisting inside her.
I put my arm around her shoulders and draw her close. She snugs her face in against my chest, and even though she’s almost as tall as I am, she feels slight, fragile. Her heart beats fast. I don’t think they truly believe you are a survivor, or they wouldn’t have brought you along, I say, leaving unsaid what the alternative may have been. Maybe mentioning testing you was a bluff to make you react? These guys are SAR, not regular army. I’m not sure they’ve even got access to things like scans.
Then why not just let us go?
I’ve got no answer for that.
I should have used another name. I’m wanted for murder in London. And if they find any of my It’s All Lies vlog posts about being a survivor and not being contagious, they’ll know anyway.
Didn’t those posts get taken down by the police almost as soon as they went up? Look, you did the best you could. Let’s hope they don’t work it all out.
We bounce along in the back of the truck for what feels like hours. Freja finally falls asleep in my arms, and her lashes, so blond, curl on her cheek. The red dye in her hair is half grown out to blond now, but the crazy look suits her.
She’s always seemed strong, fierce even, yet she couldn’t strike out at the soldiers—couldn’t bring herself to hurt anyone, even when she’s so afraid. And I wonder about this contradiction between how she seems outside and what she is like inside.
I’d felt ready to give up, to die by the side of the road. It was only when that soldier grabbed Freja away from me and I didn’t know what they were going to do to her that I seemed to come back to myself, to feel what was really happening.
She’s here because of me. I can’t let them take her. I can’t let her die.