1. Does the Artist Date have to be taken alone?
Yes. The Artist Date must be done alone. It is a two-part tool: one-half “artist,” one-half “date.” You are out to “woo” your own creative consciousness. If you go to a movie with a friend, half of you is watching the movie, and half of you is watching your friend watch the movie.
2. What is your favorite Artist Date?
My all-time favorite Artist Date is visiting a pet store where they have a large, gray-and-white bunny named George. I have permission from the store’s owner to pet George, and petting George brings me great joy and happiness. Petting his silken coat gives me a sense of wonder. George seems to like it, too.
3. Why is it hard to take Artist Dates?
Artist Dates put us in touch with a youthful, playful part of ourselves. We intuitively sense that we may awaken yearnings and dreams. This can be startling, and even painful. Often, we have suppressed our desires, and Artist Dates put us in touch with our buried feelings. They are intimate, and intimacy with ourselves can be threatening.
4. I live alone. Isn’t my whole life already an Artist Date?
No. An Artist Date is a special time set aside for self-nurturing. It is preplanned, and intended to take you out of your comfort zone. Everyday living is not the same thing as a special expedition that enchants and interests you.
5. How can we take Artist Dates if we are housebound?
During the height of the pandemic, when we were all housebound, I was often asked this question. The answer is using your imagination, doing something out of the ordinary and nurturing. Just what this is varies person to person. For one, it may be a long soak in a hot tub. For another, dancing barefoot to drum music. Many of us find baking something, or making a pot of soup, to be both nourishing and nurturing. A simple trick is numbering from one to five, and listing five fun things you could do that are just plain silly—painting your toenails purple, dyeing the tips of your hair hot pink …
6. I can’t think of any Artist Dates to take. What do I do?
A cheap but effective trick is to take Artist Dates that awaken your senses. For example, your sense of taste may take you to a new restaurant. Your sense of smell may take you to a bakery. Awakening each of our senses makes us feel more fully alive. Asking ourself what would delight our inner youngster is a fruitful question. A visit to a children’s bookstore or a toy shop may provide multiple Artist Dates. The point is to entice, enchant, or interest the youthful part of yourself.
7. How long should the Artist Date last?
There is no set rule, but ordinarily a block of time that feels leisurely is ideal. Artist Dates should not be rushed, nor should they require so much time that they are unmanageable. The trick is to allow yourself to fully experience an adventure. An hour or two is usually sufficient.
8. What does an Artist Date have to do with making art?
Everything. When we make a piece of art, we fish from an inner well that is like a koi pond. Ideally, our inner well is stocked with many ideas. Sometimes, we overfish our inner well, which makes it hard to “hook” an idea. This is where the Artist Date comes in. On an Artist Date, you are replenishing your koi pond, restocking your supply of images and ideas.
9. I find it a strain to pick an Artist Date.
The word “strain” is a cue. Remember, Artist Dates are intended to be fun. Don’t try to pick the “perfect” Artist Date. Ask yourself, “If I didn’t have to do it perfectly, what would I try?” The trick is to not be too serious.
10. Should my Artist Date relate to my art?
Ideally, an Artist Date is sheer fun. Trying to connect it in a linear fashion to your project turns fun into work. Don’t be so serious. An Artist Date “feeds” your consciousness. Think of it as being like dessert: a perfect slice of cherry pie, rather than a meal.
11. Should an Artist Date be expensive?
An Artist Date should be expansive, not expensive. Many Artist Dates are free, requiring you to expend time, not money. Take the time to “browse.”
12. Can I repeat an Artist Date?
Artist Dates are intended to expand your world. Ideally, a date explores something new. Without setting a hard-and-fast rule, I venture to say Artist Dates can be repeated, just not repeated too often. Even petting George the bunny can lose some of its magic if it becomes routine.
13. How do Artist Dates work with Morning Pages?
The two tools work best when done together. With Morning Pages, you are “sending,” telegraphing to the universe that “This is what I like, this is what I don’t like, this is what I want more of, this is what I want less of.” With Artist Dates, you have switched the dial over to “receive.” The universe has a chance to respond to you. Using the two tools together improves your synchronicity. You will increasingly find yourself in the right place at the right time. Synchronicity is the uncanny intermeshing of our inner and outer worlds. In other words, your luck improves—but it is luck you make for yourself by using the tools. Artist Dates create a sense of benevolence. The world comes to seem more friendly.
14. Why all this emphasis on childish things?
We have a mythology that tells us that art is a serious business, made by disciplined adults. The reverse is actually true. As Picasso remarked, “All of us are born artists. The trick is how to remain one.” Artist Dates nurture our inner child.
15. Why all this emphasis on frivolity?
For most of us, art can seem like a serious business. And yet, when we lighten up, we receive a flow of good ideas. The greatest bar to taking an Artist Date is approaching it too seriously, wanting to do the “perfect” Artist Date. Forget perfectionism. Allow yourself to be lighthearted. Children play with the toys at hand. Take a cue from a youngster, and allow yourself to play without demanding perfection.
16. I have a hard time justifying Artist Dates. Why is that?
One more time, take a cue from youngsters. They do not have to “justify” their play. Sometimes we are too caught up in needing to seem “adult.” It is a killjoy side of ourselves that asks us to justify our Artist Dates.
17. I find I feel more playful after taking an Artist Date. Why is that?
Many times we have stifled our playful impulses, feeling that we must be “adult.” Taking an Artist Date is a radical vote in favor of fun. Often, we have been starved for fun, and taking an Artist Date wakens an appetite for more fun. Don’t worry, you will still be able to meet your responsible obligations. In fact, an Artist Date makes it easier because we no longer feel trapped. We choose to play, and then we choose to work. We find ourselves choosing wisely.
18. When I take an Artist Date, I feel connected to a higher power. Is this normal?
Yes, quite normal. Artist Dates connect us to a benevolent source. It is as if when we are kind to ourselves, we are able to experience the universe as kindly. After all, a look at the natural world can convince us that the higher power is playful. Consider birds in all their wonderful variety. Consider trees—oaks, willows, spruce, maple—it is as though the Great Creator took great glee in creating diversity. As we awaken our own playful self, we experience the thrill of being in alignment with the Great Artist.
19. I feel nervous to take an Artist Date. I often want to cancel.
Taking an Artist Date means putting our artist first. And, if you’re used to being dutiful, this can feel threatening. It helps to remember the “date” part of an Artist Date. Remember that you are romancing yourself. Just as you wouldn’t break a romantic date, don’t allow yourself to break this date. Remember your nerves on a first date with a potential beau. Expect similar nerves as you undertake preplanned fun.
20. Can I take a “couch potato” Artist Date?
Artist Dates are intended to take us into new territory. So, yes, you can take an occasional “couch potato” Artist Date, if the fare you are watching is something out of the ordinary for yourself. But beware: “couch potato” dates can be both stultifying and addictive. Getting out of the house is important to our sense of adventure.