What’s Happening to Me?

There is a trick to getting out of flex-cuffs or any kind of restraint. Actually it’s two tricks. I happen to know both. You don’t need to dislocate your shoulder or anything fancy. Or keep the key or a paper clip under your tongue or up your sleeve like you would for regular handcuffs. Though it would be helpful if flex-cuffs used keys. Or a knife. It would be faster at least. Actually, I don’t know if a knife or key would be faster. The knife probably. But possibly the key.

Whoa. Whatever they injected me with was … wait a minute. At first, I’d felt all woozy and dizzy when they’d given me the shot. Now whatever drug they used had my brain working even faster than it did when I was nervous. Miss Ruby said it was supposed to calm me down and make me sleepy. Instead I was wide awake. And hyped up. My heart felt like it was going at about two hundred beats a minute and my thoughts were flying through my head so fast I couldn’t keep track of them all. Something was wrong with my senses. I thought the drug should dull them, but instead they were magnified somehow. Noises were louder. Lights were brighter. Maybe I was allergic or she had missed a vein or it didn’t …

It wasn’t working right.

I wasn’t calm or sleepy like she planned. It was doing exactly the opposite, acting more like a stimulant. What if I did have some kind of allergy or something? I know I had a reaction once to penicillin when I had tonsillitis. It gave me a really itchy rash and it didn’t cure me, so the doctor had to give me something else. What if I was having a weird response to this drug and it wasn’t affecting me like it was supposed to? I really needed a deck of cards to shuffle so I could figure this out, but my hands were otherwise engaged behind my back.

Once we had gotten off the elevator in the parking garage, they pulled me out of the bottom of the cart. There was a big black SUV close to the elevator door and they dragged me along to it. Then it occurred to me—the fact the drug wasn’t working like it should was a good thing. But Miss Ruby and her minions should probably remain ignorant of that fact. So I shouldn’t tell them. In fact, I should pretend like it was working, I decided.

They shoved me into the backseat. I was told to keep quiet and not to try anything smart. No problem. Even though my brain didn’t feel sleepy or tired, my arms and legs felt kind of rubbery.

I landed in a heap on the backseat but instead of complaining, I giggled.

“Don’t worry,” Fake Waiter said to Miss Ruby. “Whatever you gave him has really hit him. He’s totally out of it.”

Excellent. I’m a magician, I kept telling myself. A magician practices deception.

As the car pulled out of the parking garage, it turned left. When Angela and I had been passing time on the coach, she told me some of the things her mother taught her about being a Secret Service agent. Angela called these things “tradecraft,” sort of an umbrella term used to describe the methods an agent used in the field. Tactics such as how to blend into a crowd, how to properly conduct countersurveillance, and also things you could do if you were ever abducted.

One thing was to try and look for passing landmarks. Even if you were in an unfamiliar place, you could look for unusual buildings or anything that would allow you to mark the direction your kidnappers were taking you. But I couldn’t really see anything lying as I was on the backseat. I tried counting the number of seconds between turns, but that didn’t work either because the SUV went slower on the surface streets, and then we must have gotten on the freeway because it really picked up speed and went a long way without turning and I lost count. Besides, I figured Angela would eventually get word to Boone. Or at least I hoped she would.

I was pretty sure we were headed out of the city and probably to Miss Ruby’s ranch. Miss Ruby didn’t know Boone knew where she lived. Once Angela got to him, he’d come and get me. Right now, I had to concentrate on making them think I was helpless.

I guessed we’d driven for about a half hour and then slowed, made a turn, and rolled to a stop. A few seconds later Fake Waiter opened the back door, then yanked me off the backseat and onto my feet. It kind of hurt, but the drug was supposed to be making me not feel stuff, so I didn’t wince.

Instead, I giggled. “Waiter, did you exer give me myze hamburger? Because I’m shtill hungry,” I said slurring my words and smiling at him like a dope.

He shoved me hard in the back toward the front door of a big house. It was dark outside now and off in the distance I could hear cows mooing and assumed this must be the ranch.

“Hey, doan be sho mean,” I said. “I just … do I smell cows?”

Neither of them answered me, but Fake Waiter shoved me again.

“Where are we?” I said, weaving around like my knees might buckle at any moment. “And hey … you didn’t bring myze dinner! I’m hungrys and …”

“Shut up if you don’t want another shot,” the guy said and gave me a third shove in the back. This time I pretended to get my feet tangled up and fell down on the ground. It was hard to fall gracefully with my hands behind my back and I skinned my knee a little bit.

“Ows! Thaz’s harsh, dude,” I said. I had been around Speed Paulsen enough in my life to know what somebody sounds like when they’re stoned. I thought I was doing a good job.

“Take it easy, Sean,” Miss Ruby said. “We’re not supposed to hurt him.”

Fake Waiter’s name was Sean.

The jolt of pain when I fell to the ground kind of brought me closer to normal from the effect of the drug. I could think a little more clearly now. Not supposed to hurt me? Why? I wondered. Ransom? Probably not. The cell didn’t do things for money. And if they wanted ransom they would have taken Angela too.

It was weird. For the life of me, I couldn’t figure out what they wanted or even how they knew where we were staying. I knew Boone was worried about Malak’s real identity being uncovered by the cell. If her cover were blown it would put Angela in danger. But it didn’t seem like they’d figured out Malak’s connection to us yet. If they had, they probably would have just killed her already. And if they had discovered her deception, and even if they’d tortured her to learn what she knew … well … I’d met Malak up close a couple of times in the past few days. And I didn’t think she could ever be tortured into revealing her identity, if for no other reason than to protect Angela. She would die first. I suppose that they could have found out about her some other way. And maybe they’d taken Angela to some other location to keep us separated. That way they could sit back and wait to see who came after us and discover who was tracking them.

If they knew Angela was Malak’s daughter, maybe they were trying to set a trap for the Leopard. If she came to Angela’s rescue they would know for sure. But if they harmed Angela in any way, they would have to kill Malak because she would never stop until she hunted down every single one of them. So there was that.

“You won’t give us any trouble now will you, Q, sugar?” Miss Ruby cooed.

She needed to work on her manners because when she said “sugar” it sounded totally insincere.

“Do I shmell cows?” I said. “I like shugar. Do you have some?”

“How much of that stuff did you give him?” Sean asked Ruby. “He’s babbling like an idiot.”

Ha. That’s what you think. You just wait until … I … you just wait. I was pretty sure whatever Ruby had injected me with was really wearing off because my mouth was getting dry and I was getting a headache. This worried me a little bit. What if I really was having an allergic reaction of some kind and was going to suddenly develop really serious symptoms? It happens.

Once inside, they led me into this big study or library full of a lot of floor-to-ceiling bookcases and big leather chairs and couches.

Sean cut my flex-cuffs and my hands came free. With his hand clenched around my neck he guided me around the big desk and shoved me into the chair. Miss Ruby stood in front of the desk. After lighting a cigarette, she took a really big puff and blew out the smoke. It traveled through the air over the desk and whirled all around me. I was pretty sure she did it on purpose.

Miss Ruby removed an iPhone from her purse. Her fingers worked over the screen and she put it to her ear.

“We’re good,” she said. “You have the order,” she said a few seconds later and disconnected the call.

“What are we going to do with him?” Sean asked. Right then another guy walked in. He looked exactly like Sean, but wasn’t dressed like a waiter.

“Robert,” Miss Ruby said. “I just gave Marco the order.”

“Hey, waiter guy,” I said, looking at Sean with one eye closed. “Did youse know there is shombody elshe here who looks exactly like you?”

As Sean looked at me, his eyes narrowed. “Shut up,” he said.

“You are so grouchy all the time. You want some of myze hamburger?” I looked around at the desk and the floor to either side of me, my head flopping about. “Where did myze hamburger go?”

Robert and Miss Ruby laughed and she put the phone down on the desk. I wondered who she’d called. I hoped Marco wasn’t the guy they’d left with Angela and now they were going to … I didn’t want to think about it, but I was pretty sure I knew what “you have the order” meant.

I couldn’t let them see the worry in my face, so I let my head loll forward and hang with my chin against my chest. I knew Angela was devoting every ounce of the brain- and willpower and energy she had to getting away. I had to do the same. I owed it to her.

My eyes zeroed in on Miss Ruby’s phone. She had an iPhone with no case, just like me. I hadn’t gotten around to getting a case since my phone was replaced. As a terrorist she was probably switching phones all the time and didn’t bother with a case. Although I wondered if she realized she was missing a chance to cover something else in rubies. How useful would that phone be to Boone once X-Ray got hold of it? If I could switch it out with mine … I just couldn’t stop my thoughts.

“We’re going to wait,” Miss Ruby said. “Sean, empty his pockets.”

Sean came around the desk and lifted me to my feet. He pulled open the Velcro flaps on my cargo shorts and emptied all of my stuff out onto the desk. The decks of cards, my ropes, silk scarves, baseball cap, sunglasses, and, most important, my iPhone. All the stuff clattered across the desktop. I stared at my phone, which had landed just a few inches away from Miss Ruby’s. So close. Then he removed my Omega Seamaster. My Seamaster! Please, J.R. Please be monitoring our whereabouts right now and come get me.

“What is all this crap?” Sean complained as he emptied my last pocket, the one containing my magic coins.

“Mashick,” I said, continuing to slur my words.

“Can I has a glash of whater?” I asked, my head still bobbing forward like I might fall asleep at any moment. I raised my head and gazed at Miss Ruby with one eye closed like I was trying hard to focus.

“I don’t see why not,” she said. “Sean, why don’t you get our guest a glass of water?”

Sean didn’t look happy, but he left the room. Now all I had to do was stall and give Angela or J.R. a chance to call in the cavalry.

And figure out a way to get my hands on Miss Ruby’s phone.