Elizabeth hadn’t slept well, but she’d be kidding herself if she had expected to get some serious sleep. Everything that had happened at the mall paled compared to Matthew’s kisses. Knowing that he was sleeping twenty feet away, protecting her and her children, was reassuring but he’d made sure she knew he wanted her.
Visions of them together in her bed repeated over and over. The ways he’d take her. The positions she wanted him. With just a kiss, she’d been willing to invite him down the hall and into her bed. No one had ever kissed her like that before. Certainly not Robert. Mason’s kisses were wonderful, but Matthew knew how to kiss and make her feel like a woman.
As soon as she’d pushed those thoughts away to concentrate on sleep, the flash of the blade aimed for her shocked her system wide awake again. It was as though she was reliving the event over and over. She commanded herself to stop that line of thought.
Rolling over to check the time on her phone, she decided it was far too early to call the Sinclairs. Even though they were ranchers and got up before dawn, she needed to wait at least another hour or two since they were in Texas and on Central Time.
Scanning through her contacts, she came across Logan’s name. He’d be up. More than once he’d talked about running on Onslow Beach on Camp Lejeune and watching the sun rise. She hit the number.
“Elizabeth.” Logan panted. “Are you all right?”
“No,” she answered quietly. Five minutes later, she’d explained the situation. “Do you know anyone who could go to Texas and watch over the children? Keep them safe?”
“As a matter of fact, I do. It’d be good for him.” Logan’s breathing had slowed as though he was walking. “One of my captains was injured by an I.E.D. a few months ago on a mission in Iraq…chasing our favorite caliphate wannabe. He’s doing some intensive physical therapy, but they’re getting ready to release him to finish on his own. Physically, he’s recovering, but mentally…he lost three good men. I think some R and R in Texas with civilians is perfect for him. I’ll head him your way in a few hours. He can escort the kids to Texas and stay with them until things settle down with you. Sound like a plan?”
Elizabeth was near tears. She had the best friends ever. “That would be wonderful. I’ll call the Sinclairs and let them know there will be three staying with them. What’s this man’s name?”
“Zeke, Captain Zeke Gates. We call him Buck. He’s from farm country in Wyoming. Used to ride bulls if you can believe that.” The laugh in Logan’s voice was unmistakable. “A Texas farm is just what the man needs. Do they have horses?”
“Lots of them.” Elizabeth loved going to the Sinclair ranch. She felt closer to Mason there, riding the same land he’d ridden as a child and staying in his childhood bedroom, although it had been remodeled. Katherine and Dean were wonderful grandparents to Austin. They were so much like her own parents. They loved each other and their children. Thank God they loved Austin as much as they did their other grandchildren. Liza had stolen their heart as well. She and Dean had a special bond, especially when it came to the animals.
“Let me see if I can get Buck on a transport flight to D.C. today.” He paused. “Elizabeth, you need to be careful. Very careful.”
“I–” she started to reassure him but he bowled over her.
“I know you can take care of yourself. I’ve fought beside you. But these sons of bitches seem determined to kill you, and it’s been years since you’ve been in combat. Your life is different now.” He breathed out audibly. “Fuck. I wish I could take off a few days and hunt these fuckers down myself, but we’re chin deep in shit on several continents. I can’t break away. I’d call on Micah, but he’s in the same boat, and we’re all sinking fast. USSOCOM has us spread so thin at the moment we’re barely giving our men three months stateside before flipping them back out. I’m sorry, but I just can’t leave right now.”
“That’s okay. Matthew is here helping me.” She sounded excited because she was. Just having someone at your side was wonderful, but it was Matthew. He’d proven himself to be a true friend, and solid in a dangerous situation.
“Who the hell is Matthew?” Logan sounded wary.
“We met him the day of Robert’s funeral. He was with Gabe.” Had that been almost four months already? Yes. The time had flown because she’d been so busy with work, the kids finishing the school year, their sports, and Matthew. He’d become a growing part of their life.
“The old guy?” Logan spit out. “I’m not sure he’d be much good in a gunfight.”
“Matthew isn’t that old. I think he’s in his early fifties, maybe even late forties. Neither of us has room to talk since we’re only a few years younger. I think the white hair ages him.” Elizabeth wasn’t sure how old he was, and a few years didn’t matter at their age. His face looked like he could be ten years younger than her, almost too pretty, angelic. His eyes told another story. They were hard, like they’d seen too much. He was the most handsome man she’d ever seen. And he was fit. Plus, he’d had her back last night.
She needed to change the subject. She was confident that Matthew would help her figure this out. “I have to call the airlines and make some reservations, as well as the Sinclairs. Call me when Zeke is on his way so I can make arrangements to pick him up. Thanks for everything, Logan.”
“Will do. Be safe, Elizabeth.” He ended the call.
She checked the time and called the Sinclairs, the airlines, and her boss. Everyone was on board. Zeke would fly with her and the children on the redeye where she’d walk them through security to meet Katherine and Dean. She’d turn around and take the next flight back. Her children needed to be as far away from her as possible.
She smelled coffee brewing and heard someone in the kitchen. Matthew. For a while, she’d forgotten about him. She quickly showered and dressed, pulling on a pair of comfortable jeans and an old Army T-shirt. Barefoot, she entered the kitchen to find Matthew in a deep discussion with her children about the blueberry pancakes he was making. She didn’t know she had blueberries.
“I like it when the blueberries are in every bite.” Austin poured juice into glasses as Liza set the kitchen table.
“I likes ta put the syrup just in the middle and dip each piece into the puddle.” Liza set a knife down then moved it. “Where does that go?”
Matthew and Austin said at the same time, “Knife and spoon are on the right, so forks are all that’s left.”
“I know that, but which is my right?” Her precious daughter glared at her hands.
Elizabeth laughed out loud. “Let me help you with that, princess.”
Liza pulled the silverware to her chest. “I gosta do this. Mr. Matt said that was my job. We gotta be real helpful today cuz you had a bad day yesterday with that bad man in the mall.”
She wasn’t sure who she wanted to hug first, her daughter or Matthew. Even though there was that kiss last night, she wasn’t sure if things had changed in the light of day, or now that their bodies had dumped all that adrenaline. Then too, she wasn’t about to start showing affection for a man so soon after Robert’s death. She chose Liza.
Scooping up her daughter, she hugged her tight. “I love you, princess.” And then she placed kisses all over her face, loving the way her baby girl laughed. When she stopped, and set Liza down, she chased Austin around the table. “Your turn.”
“Really, Mom, I’m good.” Austin said, smiling as he darted by her, just out of range. She finally caught her son around the waist and kissed him loudly several times on his cheeks.
“Mom, I’m not a little kid anymore,” he insisted as he wiped his face with his hands.
“You will always be my little boy, and I will always love you.” She released him and sensed someone watching her. Looking up, her gaze met Matthew’s. His eyes were almost gold in the kitchen light. He gifted her with that small smile she was coming to like way too much. It touched something deep inside and made her nervous and anxious at the same time.
“How many pancakes will you eat?” Matthew asked.
“I’m starved. Two, please.” Elizabeth decided it must be the hormonal let down, but she was really hungry.
He raised an eyebrow. “Really? You’re starved and two is all you can eat?” He was teasing her, and she liked it.
Her smile was sweet as she answered, “Yeah. Two. I normally eat one and it fills me until way past lunch.” The idea of meals and planning the rest of the day brought her back to the reality of everything that needed to be accomplished the next few hours.
“Guess what,” she announced as she wandered to the stove to see what else Matthew was cooking. “You kids are going to Texas tonight and spend some time with Katherine and Dean.”
Austin ran toward her and hugged her around her waist. “I love the farm. How long can we stay? Are you going to ride the horses with me again? Maybe Liza can ride the pony.” He tore away from his mother and ran to his sister. “Grandpa Dean bought a new pony for all his grandchildren. His name is Dusty, and he’s all brown. We have to brush him out and curry him real good before we ride him because he likes to roll in the dust in the pasture.”
“Austin, do you know why you have to brush him really well before you put a saddle on him?” Matthew asked as he put small pancakes onto a plastic plate adorned with Disney characters.
“Yeah. Because Grandpa Dean said we have to.”
At her son’s simple statement, Elizabeth laughed out loud. She was joined the second later by Matthew.
“Grandpa Dean can be a real stickler for the way his horses are treated.” Matthew put one large pancake onto a plate then carried both to the table for Liza and Austin. “Sit down and eat before it gets cold,” he ordered the children. As he returned to the stove, he explained, “If you don’t get the dirt out of their coat then when you put the saddle blanket and saddle on the horse, it could rub them and they could end up with an open sore. Then nobody can ride them for weeks.”
“Did you grow up with horses?” Austin dug into his pancake.
“Yes. I grew up on a ranch, if you could call it that. It wasn’t much of a farm though.” He dished up two more plates with two pancakes on each and brought them to the table.
“Grandpa Dean and Grandma Kate have a big ranch. They have horses, cattle, and even a bunny. They grow stuff, too.” Her son filled his mouth with pancake.
“Austin. You know the rule. Nothing bigger than a quarter.” He had manners, but sometimes Elizabeth needed to remind him.
After chewing the oversized mouthful, he responded, “Yes, ma’am.” He sipped his juice. “This is going to be fun. All of us at the ranch.”
That would be fun, thought Elizabeth, but not going to happen this time. She needed her children safe. “Just you and Liza are going. But a friend of Uncle Logan is going to go with you. His name is Zeke.”
Matthew set the plate down in front of Elizabeth and held her gaze. “Logan found someone?”
She nodded up at him then continued, “We are all catching the redeye to Dallas. I’ll walk you through security, like usual, but this time Liza is going to the ranch, too. Zeke is going to be with you, all the time.”
“It’ll be like we have a new daddy.” Liza’s words struck Elizabeth in the heart. Did she want a new father? Robert had hated the ranch and refused to go, even though he’d been invited. Elizabeth hadn’t pushed the point because it was Mason’s home. In truth, she didn’t want to share that with Robert.
“No. Zeke is just a friend of Uncle Logan’s.” Elizabeth needed to be sure the children understood that fact. “Because of the bad man in the mall, Zeke is going to make sure there are no bad men anywhere near you.”
Austin was about to put a small piece into his mouth. “Besides, if we get a new daddy it’s going to be Matthew.”
“What?” Both Elizabeth and Matthew said at the same time.
“Mr. Matt is going to be our new daddy. Right?” The boy bounced his hopeful gaze from Elizabeth to Matthew then back again.
Matthew just smiled at her and set his fork down on the plate as though he was curious as to how she was going to handle the question.
“Why do you think that?” Elizabeth asked her son.
The boy’s eyes got large. He knew he was put on the spot. “Because he spent the night here at our house. He didn’t go home like usual.”
Oh, hell. Her son was far too observant. Elizabeth looked into the living room and saw no sign of the bedding she had set up for Matthew last night. Her gaze flew back to him.
He winked at her. Yes, winked. Then gave her that little half smile that melted her brain to mush. “Yes, Austin, I did spend the night here...on the couch. After what happened at the mall, I wanted to make sure every one of you is safe.”
“Cuz you got a gun to protect us.” Liza pointed her fat fork toward Matthew.
“I do have a gun, and both of you know never to touch a gun, right?” Wasn’t that wonderful he’d addressed that point so perfectly?
Both children nodded their heads dramatically.
“Right. But when I’m an adult I’m gonna learn to shoot so I can protect my mom and Liza.” Sometimes, Austin could be the sweetest little boy. Elizabeth thought about the two pistols in small gun safes in the house. She should really have a talk with Austin about gun safety. She had grown up with weapons, had a BB gun when she was eight years old. She then remembered that Austin was nine. Perhaps for his birthday, or maybe even Christmas, she would get him his first gun. She also needed to look into gun safety classes for him.
“After breakfast we are going to go pack some clothes for both of you.” She looked directly at her son. “And we’re going to clean up your bedroom.” She would probably have to do several loads of laundry before they had everything they needed.
“Can I take my new baseball glove and the new ball?” His pleading eyes were impossible to refuse. The dark brown and gold, just like his father’s, spoke volumes without him having to say a word.
“Perhaps Grandpa Dean or your uncles will throw the ball with you.” Matthew forked up a stack of pancake, dripping with maple syrup. “Your Uncle Kenneth was quite a ballplayer at one time. He played baseball in college for a few years.” He set the fork down then rubbed his temples.
She was about to ask Matthew how he knew so much about the Sinclair family, but his obvious pain shoved the question right out of her mind.
“Sure, sweetie. I know you want to break your glove in,” she said distractedly to her son. She redirected her attention to Matthew. “Can I get you something for the headache?”
“No, but thank you.” By the way he rubbed his entire scalp, she knew he was fighting pain. Men. Why did they think they had to be so macho? All he needed to do was swallow a pill, and he’d feel better soon.
When the children were finished, Matthew volunteered to do the dishes since everyone else had lots to accomplish.
“Elizabeth, what’s your flight information?” He looked past her, so she glanced the same direction. The hallway was empty since the children had gone into their bedrooms. He pulled her into his arms. “I’m not letting you out of this house alone, say nothing about traveling all the way to Texas without me.”
When he brushed his lips over hers, she forgot any protest. “I’d like that.” Having someone at her back made her feel so much more comfortable.
“I need to make some arrangements with the office so that the airline will know that I’m carrying a weapon. I’ll also make sure we’re all seated together.” He ran his fingertips through her hair. Tingles started at her crown and settled between her legs.
“I would really appreciate that,” she managed to say. She wanted him to touch her again, to feel like a man wanted her. She leaned in and felt his erection. Oh, God, he did want her. She swallowed hard then looked back down the hall towards the children’s bedrooms. “I have a lot I need to get done today.” She went up on her toes and kissed him. “Thank you for making breakfast and dealing with the dishes.”
She tried to pull away, but he held her in place. Then he gave her the half grin. “I did a lot of work this morning. I think I need a better thank you.” He lowered his head to hers, giving her plenty of time to back away, or run away. She wasn’t going anywhere. She wrapped her arms around his neck, and leaned into him, opening her mouth right after contact. He tasted sweet like maple syrup and coffee.
“Mom, I can’t find—” echoed from the hall.
Elizabeth jumped back two feet. Her fingers flew to her kiss-swollen lips. She couldn’t help but look up at Matthew’s eyes which had turned nearly golden.
“I’m coming,” she called over her shoulder then rattled off the flight information as she headed to get her children packed.
As she picked up pajamas next to Austin’s bed, she scanned his nightstand for half-filled glasses of water he liked to place there at bedtime.
She froze when she came face-to-face with Mason.
Her knees gave out and she collapsed to the floor, her gaze never leaving the picture of Austin’s father. She hadn’t seen that picture in years.
She picked it up and noticed a little piece of paper stuck in the edge. I love you. Always.
The words blurred, and her head went fuzzy.
“Mom, can I take—” Austin ran into the room and stopped five feet from her. “Mom…are you…I’m sorry.”
She sucked in a breath and got her circulation moving again. She’d been holding her breath that entire time. She dropped her hands and the picture into her lap. “Full sentences, please.”
“Are you mad at me for putting my Dad’s picture back out?” Her son’s frightened eyes darted between her face and the picture.
Elizabeth’s heart melted. “No. Not at all. Why would you think I’d be mad?” She’d shown her son that official picture of Mason when he’d been promoted to captain since the day the boy was born.
He hunched his shoulders and looked away.
“Austin, look at me.” What the hell was up? Come to think of it, she hadn’t seen this picture in years.
“I’m not mad at all.” She lifted the picture and looked at her handsome husband, her heart filling with joy that Austin wanted to see it before he went to sleep. Returning her gaze to her son, she asked, “What’s wrong?” Maybe he was missing his connection with a father figure and needed the picture again.
He shifted from foot to foot.
“Come here.” She patted the floor beside her. He shuffled his feet and plopped down next to her. “I haven’t seen this picture in years. Where’s it been?”
“Under my bed. Here.” He pointed to the space between the mattress and box springs.
“Why did you put it there?” She thought that was a strange place to keep it.
Austin sniffed and looked away.
“No, you don’t, young man.” She wouldn’t allow him to ignore her. “You tell me right now about this picture.” She forced his face back around,
“Robert the jerk is gone so now I can have it again.” Tears started to roll down his face.
She considered each of his words. “What do you mean, you can have it again?”
The tears flowed. “Robert, I hated him.” Gasp. “I’m glad he’s dead.” His shoulders shook as he cried and huffed in breaths.
Elizabeth pulled her son into her lap and leaned back against his bed. “I know you two didn’t get along, but yes, he’s gone. Now, catch your breath and tell me about this picture of your dad.”
It took a few minutes, but Austin gained control. “We were fighting, and Robert chased me into my room.”
Oh, shit. Had Robert hit Austin? He hadn’t better have ever laid a hand on her son. It took every ounce of patience for her to encourage him to continue.
“He said he was now my father, and my dad was dead.” Austin grabbed the picture from the floor and pressed it against his chest. “He told me I was too old for keeping Dad’s picture around and that I needed to realize that he was my new dad. He said he’d take the picture away, so I hid it where he wouldn’t find it.”
He hiccupped, and she gave him a minute to gain his composure. “Is that all of it?”
She wasn’t surprised when he shook his head.
“I said my dad was a hero and he was nothing but some loser that made you pregnant.” The tears started again, and Elizabeth cringed at her son’s perception of what had happened.
Yes, she’d gotten pregnant soon after they were married but she’d wanted more children. They hadn’t told Austin until she started to show. Since he’d been her whole life until she’d married Robert, she’d been worried how he’d take a new father and a new baby. Chalk that up as another motherhood fail. She was already disgusted with herself about Austin’s and Robert’s failure to build a relationship, but she had no idea how bad it was for her son. If Robert wasn’t already dead, she’d kill him.
She pulled her son into her arms, the picture of Mason between them. “I’m so sorry, Austin. You should have told me.”
His whole body shook. “Robert said if I told you, then I really was a baby who had to run to his mommy to deal with his problems. That I needed to grow up and be a good big brother to Liza.”
She hugged her boy so tight she was afraid she’d break the picture. “You are the best big brother any little girl could ask for.” He was such a good kid. How did she ever get so lucky?
They sat like that for a long time, just holding each other. She wondered if Austin had fallen asleep.
“Mommy, Mommy, I gots my toys all packed.” At Liza’s announcement, both Elizabeth and Austin looked up. She was dragging two carryon bags behind her.
Austin slid off her lap and the slip of paper floated out.
Liza’s eyes grew huge.
Elizabeth lifted it when the paper landed on the rug. “Where did you get this?” She knew, of course, but had Austin gone through her room?
He and Liza exchanged a guilty look.
“From the pretty box, Mommy.” So, it had been Liza who had searched her room. The girl darted out the door and was back in seconds, Elizabeth’s most precious memories in her hands.
“See. The box is so pretty.” Liza opened the lid. “I can’t read so I brung them to Austin. He’s a good reader. I made him keep that one because his daddy loved him.”
Elizabeth’s heart broke wide open. What her daughter didn’t say screamed through the silence. Her father didn’t love her.
Austin popped to his feet and put his arm around his little sister. With the eyes of an adult, he bent so they were face to face. “I love you, Liza. Always.”
“I know.” She smiled as though it was a given. “Mommy loves me, too.”
When the doorbell rang, Elizabeth froze. She had no idea who would come to her house.
Matthew stuck his head into the bedroom. “I’ll get the door. Grab the children and take them to the master bathroom.”
She glanced at the gun in his right hand.
“Get yours on the way in. Whoever is out there will have to get through me to get to you. I want you prepared.”
The doorbell rang again.
She jumped up and grabbed the children’s hands. As they made their way through the living room, Matthew was already standing at the door.
Gun in hand, the children waiting in the bathroom, Elizabeth tiptoed across the master bedroom to listen at the cracked door. Matthew was talking to another man. She couldn’t understand their words, but the tone was serious yet not unfriendly.
“Have a seat in the living room while I get Elizabeth and the children.” Matthew must’ve been on the move because his voice grew louder.
She slipped into the bathroom and took each child by the hand. They were ready to come out when Matthew knocked on the door.
“Come on out and meet Zeke Gates.”