December, 1932
Dear Mr. Claus,
I don’t believe I would be disingenuous or resorting to tergiversation if I maintained that I have been a paradigm of meritorious behavior in the past year. I do not wish to expatiate on this entreaty ad nauseam, but I remain sanguine about your decision to accede to my request.
Admiringly,
William Buckley
1880
Dear Santa,
I hope you can find the way to our house. Most people take the wrong road. You will be pretty tired after travelling all those miles, but then you’ll be able to get a good night’s sleep.
Robert Frost
1931
Dear Santa,
Please bring me the following toys for Christmas: Hopalong Cassidy six-shooter, Daisy air rifle, J. Edgar Hoover model tommy gun, Tom Mix model Colt Army revolver.
Chuck Heston
1786
Dear Santa, St. Nicholas, Father Christmas, Kris Kringle,
I have been a good, fine, virtuous boy, lad, child, youth. I want, desire, wish for a set, complete assortment, collection of books, tomes, editions, publications of the medical art, healing, therapies, and curatives.
Thank you, many thanks, much obliged,
Peter Roget
1934
Listen, you fat hockey puck, if I don’t get what I want for Christmas I hope you get fleas in your beard and your lead reindeer gets a hernia.
Donald Rickles
2000-01