CHAPTER 15

Tired of standing, Kade dragged a pair of plastic crates from the trash and flipped them. He seated himself on one and patted the other. “Take a seat.”

Callie perched on the crate and rested her shotgun across her knees. “What about Amity?”

Kade squinted through the noon light. Amity remained in the middle of the junkyard clearing, her arms folded and her back erect. “No point offering. She’d only say that sitting is for the weak.”

Most of the gangsters had grown bored with playing sentry and had, like Kade, started relaxing on requisitioned bits of scrap. One pair, however, had chosen to stay on their feet. They watched Amity with the wariness of rabbits eyeing a wolf.

Callie tugged down the brim of her cap, further shadowing her face. As usual, her eyes were thoughtful, two deep brown circles expressive of sensitivity and heartbreak. “Why is Amity so unfriendly?”

A big question and only time for a little answer. “She’s suffered to the point she can’t get any relief except for when she’s hurting somebody else.”

“So you feel sorry for her?”

“No. I admire her a great deal.”

Wind rushed through the junkyard, whistling over open bottles and setting trash rattling down the scrap piles. Amity turned and stalked up to Kade, her shadow stretching long behind her. “You’ve lowered your guard,” she said.

“Nobody here is eager to fight, except for you,” Kade said. “What would you have done if Lexi hadn’t stepped in?”

“I’d have taken care of it. In any case, she’s handling Rusalka now.”

“Yeah, by selling out poor Isaac,” said Callie. “Someone should go back and warn him.”

“It’s a bluff,” said Kade. “I can’t imagine Lexi doing something so callous.”

Amity bowed her head. Her hair shone golden in the sunlight, and had her face been less grim, the effect might have been beautiful. “Of course it’s a bluff,” she said. “She has Project Sky. She could make that monster obey any command she wanted.”

“You sound like you have faith in her.”

“I acknowledge she sees things we can’t.” With the tip of her boot, Amity pushed a small scrap of metal through the dust. Back and forth, a pensive gesture, scratching a line in the ground. “And she took Riva in order to protect her. That speaks well of her motivations.”

“Poor Riva,” said Callie. “She tried so hard to convince Rusalka.”

“Riva means well, but she doesn’t understand the gang mentality. Lexi does.” Amity stopped toeing the dirt and met Kade’s eyes. “If we had her, we could accomplish anything.”

A troubling idea, and one that she definitely hadn’t gotten from Nikolas. “Forget about it,” said Kade. “Lexi’s independent. And she’s marked now.”

Callie grinned. “You think she’s going to end up screwing Rusalka?”

“Don’t be preposterous,” Amity said. “It’s as if you assume she can have any woman she wants.”

“But you can’t deny she has sex appeal. Kade, be honest. Did you have a crush on her when you two were growing up?”

An idea amusing enough to make him smile. “I was in love with someone else,” said Kade. “Lexi was always more like a sibling. Even now, it’s hard to think of her as anything but family.”

“Probably just as well, given she’s not into guys. That’s the one thing she and I have in common.” Callie turned her cheeky smile on Amity. “Speaking of which, I notice she’s been checking you out.”

“I’ve no interest in hearing your smutty fantasies.” Amity stormed off.

Kade laughed. “Thousands of years of human civilization, yet we still can’t get over the fact we sometimes have sex with each other.”

“When I told my mom I was gay,” said Callie, “she chased me around our home with a broken bottle. Kept rambling about how I’d never give her a grandchild. I pointed out we could barely feed ourselves, let alone a grandchild. Apparently that was a ‘pervert excuse.’ Whatever that means.”

“I never grow tired of stories about your mom. What was the context?”

“I was twelve at the time. Had a crush on the girl living above us. Kissed her that same summer, and it felt like I’d conquered the world.” Callie gave Kade a bright, curious look. “You ever been with a guy?”

“I’m open-minded. I like to think that I see past gender. But it was a woman that I fell in love with.”

“What happened? Did she leave you?”

Would it have been easier if she had? “No. She died.”

Callie’s face fell, and Kade smiled. That was what he liked most about her, that instinctive empathy. “Ever since,” he said, “I’m attracted to people who remind me of her, often in ways I don’t even register at first. They might resemble her, or it’ll be something more subtle, like the way they laugh. I can’t stop wishing for her.”

“I’m sorry.” Callie toyed with a flyaway strand of her hair. “I wonder what hurts more. Losing the person you loved because they died, or losing them because they betrayed you.”

“Death. It reminds us that our time will come too. Once, we deluded ourselves with religious consolations, but that sort of thinking is gone now, peeled away like the soil, broken like the coral, dissolved like the glaciers. When we killed this planet, we proved there was no God but us.”

“Are you quoting yourself, Mr. Writer?”

Kade gave a wry shrug. “Maybe.”

“I just wish Lexi and I weren’t always fighting. She thrives on it, but it only leaves me feeling sad and ugly. I don’t know how to—”

Callie was interrupted by the sound of raised voices. Amity had begun arguing with two of the gangsters, her body language suggestive of a snake about to strike.

“Shit,” Kade said. “Wait here.” He hurried over, his hand moving to the gun in his trench coat.

“Five seconds,” said one of the gangsters, a lean man with a scar crossing his lips. “If you’re lucky.”

“You’re a pathetic junkyard dog,” Amity said. “Do as your mistress commanded and slink back to your pack.”

Kade sighed. Never bring a bloodthirsty guerrilla to a gang fight. “Someone want to tell me what this is about?”

The other gangster, a squat woman with a shaved head, gave Kade a menacing look. “We were just telling your girlfriend how lucky she is.”

“Yeah,” said the scarred man. “Saying how Rusalka would have sliced her up, left her open and stinking.”

The poetry of the street. Kade nudged Amity in the ribs. “Let it go. Come sit with us.”

“I’m content where I am,” Amity said. “I’ll be even happier when this scum leaves me alone.”

The woman’s jacket creaked as she folded her arms. “Easy for you to talk that way now, bitch, when Rusalka isn’t here to put you in your place.”

A thoughtful look settled across Amity’s face. Kade braced himself.

“I’ll give you one last opportunity to do something intelligent,” she said. “Get away from me, or I’ll put you down.”

“You can’t touch me. Rusalka would—”

Amity moved with a speed made all the more terrifying because she wasn’t in any way augmented—it was pure anger that drove her, the blood rage of a woman with plenty of cause to want the world dead. One vicious grab and twist later, the gangster screamed, a sound accompanied by the snap of bone. Kade’s stomach turned.

“My threats have consequences.” Amity released the woman’s broken arm and shoved her to the ground. “Remember that.”

The other gang members returned to their feet, seeming more bewildered than outraged, while the scarred man licked his lips. Sprawled on the soil nearby, the crippled woman clutched her arm and whimpered.

“You can’t just walk away from doing that,” said the scarred man. “You can’t just break her fucking arm and walk away.”

“I’m not walking anywhere. You, on the other hand, would do well to make some distance.” Amity turned her back on the hapless gangster. “I’m sick of looking at your face.”

“Don’t you turn away from me, you fucking whore.”

“That’s enough,” said Kade. “Trust me, she can do much worse.”

“Motherfucker.” The injured gangster staggered to her feet, her ruined arm hanging. “You crazy fucking cunt, look what you did!”

“It’s a clean break,” said Amity. “You should be grateful.”

The woman glared at her companion. “You fucking pussy. Are you just going to stand there and watch?” She touched her arm and hissed. “Christ. Shoot the bitch.”

A nervous twitch animated the scarred man’s lips. “Fuck it.” He drew a snub-nosed revolver and leveled it at Amity’s head. “Turn around.” He clicked back the safety. “Turn the fuck around!”

Shit. Kade sucked in breath. It would be a miracle if the gangster had more than a few precious bullets to go with the gun, but it would only take one. “Amity, he’s not bluffing about the gun.”

“I’m aware of that,” said Amity. “And if he has any sense, he’ll put it away, go back to his friends and wait for his mother to return.”

“Jesus. You’re as childish as they are.” Kade inched up to the gangster. “Listen to me. Rusalka isn’t going to be happy if you pull that trigger. It’s her that decides the punishments around here, not you.”

The man sneered. “Shut your dumb black mouth.”

“Hey, you racist son of a bitch.” Callie marched across the dirt, furious, her shotgun raised. “Don’t you dare talk to Kade that way. I’ll blow a hole right through you.”

A gang member sidled close, a knife in hand, while another reached for the strap of her rifle. Kade tried to focus through the dizzying panic constricting his lungs and speeding his blood. This was going south fast.

“You won’t shoot,” said the scarred man. “You’re chickenshit. Fat-ass black-loving bitch. Look how your fucking hands are shaking.”

The thug was right. Callie wasn’t ready to pull the trigger, and anyone looking at her pale face could see it. “Take it easy,” Kade said. “There’s no reason this has to end with blood.”

“He apologizes first,” said Callie. “And then he backs the fuck down.”

The man leered at Callie. “Yeah, right.” He broke into jeering laughter. “Watch this. I’m gonna make her piss herself.” He pointed his pistol at her face. “Bang, bitch…”

Kade lowered his revolver.

Her boots ringing against the ground, Lexi sprinted toward the body. Rusalka strode behind her, while Riva and the bodyguard jogged in pursuit. Lexi reached the corpse, covered her mouth and looked away.

“You shot my man,” said Rusalka, toneless.

Lexi touched Rusalka’s forearm. “Easy. He’d have a good reason.”

The gangster lay at Callie’s feet, the back of his skull reduced to a glistening mess. Callie stared down at him, her face drained of all color. Riva put an arm around her waist and murmured into her ear.

“He turned a gun on my friend,” said Kade. “And I don’t take chances with the lives of my friends, Rusalka.”

“See? Asshole had it coming.” Lexi gave Rusalka a meaningful look. “Can’t have your thugs coming up with their own ideas.”

Rusalka remained silent. Maybe Lexi could read her, but Kade saw no hint in that haughty face as to what the gang boss might be thinking.

“I’m sorry,” said Amity. She hadn’t flinched at the gunshot, but her eyes betrayed a horrified understanding. “It’s my fault. They were looking for trouble, and I was eager to give it to them.”

“She broke my arm,” said the crippled gangster. “Rusalka, she—”

“Shut up, or I’ll break the other,” said Rusalka. The woman cringed. “I told you to watch. Not to stir up trouble. To watch.” Rusalka gestured at the corpse. “Get this out of here.”

One of the gang members took a tentative step forward. “But—”

“He had orders, and he ignored them.” Rusalka glared at the gangster until he retreated, cowed. It was little wonder she’d risen to the top, with her lofty physique and the aura of command that came with it. “If things went down here as I expect they did, this man must be a quick shot.”

“I have to be,” said Kade. “Journalism’s a dangerous profession.”

Rusalka inspected Kade with obvious appreciation, and Lexi smirked. “You’ll be happy to hear that Rusalka and I have come to an understanding,” she said. “Isn’t that right, boss?”

“It is,” said Rusalka. “While you all show me proper respect, you have my protection in the district. As for Isaac, in my eyes he’s dead already.” She sneered at the body being dragged across the scrapyard. “If it weren’t for the shitstains I have to work with, I could run this city.”

“That’s true.” Lexi winked. “Vassago would have nothing on you.”

Classic Lexi. Her streetwise braggadocio combined with a little outrageous flattery turned even the proudest gangsters into putty.

Rusalka stroked Lexi’s hair before giving her a gentle shove away. “Get out of my sight. Put that van away too. There’s a garage two blocks down from you, heading east along Waite Street. Blue frontage, sturdy door. Here’s the key.” She took a bunch of keys from her pocket and tossed one to Amity, who caught it. “I expect to get that back.”

“You will,” said Lexi, her voice lively with insinuation. “I wouldn’t want to leave without saying goodbye.”

Amity sighed. “For God’s sake.”

* * *

The trip back to the bunker proved surprisingly cheerful. Lexi strutted with her arms around Callie and Riva both, providing a steady flow of amusing chatter. Callie had regained her spirits enough to laugh along with Riva, who seemed happy in her newfound company.

Even Amity had mellowed. She walked beside Kade, a short distance behind the lively trio, with her hands in her pockets and a pensive look on her face. She took her role as the group’s guardian seriously, and hopefully this was one shock that would get through to her.

For his part, Kade struggled to relax. Killing wasn’t a habit for him, and he could still taste the nausea that came with taking a life. Nobody ever knew what a person might be capable of given another chance, and Kade was big on second chances.

Unfortunately, the way life played out, he was rarely in a position to offer them.

Lexi whispered in Callie’s ear, and Callie giggled. “I thought those two were at war,” said Amity. “Now look at them.”

“Because of her.” Kade nodded at Riva. The late evening light burnished her chiseled cheeks, warmed her olive skin and set her Mohawk blazing a brilliant pink. “The peacemaker in their midst.”

“Nikolas predicted she would have a calming effect upon Lexi. I suppose insight like that is why he leads Open Hand.”

The wistful note in Amity’s voice was impossible to miss. “We all have our role to play. A talent to draw upon.”

With a gleeful whoop, Lexi stole Callie’s cap and placed it on her own head. Amity laughed. “It seems some have more talents than others.”

Amazing. Kade could count on his fingers the number of times he remembered seeing Amity laugh. “Lexi’s not what you assumed her to be, is she?”

“She’s still a creature of the gang world. But she seems to have resisted the worst of its influences.”

Their hideout came into sight, and Lexi cheered and raised the pilfered cap. Callie took the opportunity to grab it back, much to Riva’s amusement. “It’s a rarity to see Riva so relaxed,” said Amity. “She’s usually very shy.”

“You wouldn’t guess from the way she wears her hair.”

“I suppose it’s a form of defiance. In any case, nobody hassles her in Bunker One. I make sure of it.” Amity scowled into the distance. “There’s the coward we left behind.”

Sure enough, Zeke was sitting on the sidewalk, instantly recognizable by the gleam of titanium across his scalp. The group approached him, and he bounced to his feet. “You guys made it back. That’s cool.”

“Worried for us, were you?” said Lexi. “Just as well you didn’t come. Things got a little messy.”

Zeke peered at the group, as if mentally counting each member. “Did anyone die?”

“Yeah. Amity. But she was such a stiff when she was alive, you can’t even tell the difference.” Lexi jostled him, and he grunted. “So why aren’t you underground?”

“That Isaac dude was freaking me out. Mumbling to himself. So I waited out here in the mumbling-junkie-free zone.”

“Oh, yeah, Isaac. I have good news for that stinky bastard. Let’s go break it to him.” Lexi draped an arm over Zeke’s shoulders and directed him toward the door. “You should’ve seen Rusalka. She was seven feet tall.”

“No, she wasn’t,” said Callie. “Maybe six foot seven.”

“Either way, she was fun for a merciless savage. I sat in her lap. Most dangerous lap I’ve ever sat in.”

Kade made to follow the other inside, but Amity stopped him. “Wait.” She looked him in the eyes. “Do you intend to tell Nikolas about my mistake?”

“It’s my job to report the truth. But my duty is to protect the people I care for. Duty comes first.”

Gratitude softened Amity’s features, suggesting the woman she might have otherwise been. “Thank you for saving Callie’s life. I can’t understand what I was thinking.”

Kade took one of her callused hands and pressed it. “You weren’t. That other part of you took over.”

“You and Ash always treated me as a comrade, from the very beginning. Besides Nikolas, nobody else would even talk to me. I never dared ask why the two of you were different.”

“Ash always saw the best in people. I always followed her lead.” Kade released Amity’s hands. “Let’s see how Isaac reacts to the good news.”

Isaac was hunched over a table in the galley, running his fingers over the scored marks in its surface. He looked up, and for a second confusion filled his eyes, as if he’d forgotten who they were. “Riva,” he said. “Callie.” They were the only names he seemed capable of remembering. “Rusalka let you go?”

“More than that,” said Lexi. “She’s not hunting you. Heat’s off, big guy.”

“That don’t make sense. I crossed her.”

“And I made her feel funny in her sexy parts, so now everything’s smoothed over.” Lexi walked past the burners, flicking them on and off, before grinning at nobody in particular. “Don’t all rush to thank me.”

“While you parade yourself in grotesque self-congratulation,” said Amity, “I’m going to contact Nikolas. I’ll tell him we’ve secured the bunker and will be here overnight.” She returned up the staircase, her trench coat flapping at her heels.

“I still don’t understand how you did it,” said Riva. “Lexi, it was like you had her hypnotized. I know you’re irresistible, but this was something else.”

Lexi sat on the edge of a bench, crossed her legs, and stared at Riva. After a few seconds of silence, she smiled. “Okay, sure. That implant of mine the shut-ins are after? It’s named Project Sky. Out here, we call it the ‘suicide chip.’ You ever heard of it?”

“No. But ‘suicide chip’ sounds terrible.”

“Sure is. It’s killed or left brain-dead anyone else who’s had it installed. I’m the only success story.” Lexi paused, presumably for dramatic effect. “It lets me read minds. Enter people’s heads and play with what’s in there. That’s what I did to Rusalka.”

“Is that a joke? Are you seriously saying you can read my mind?”

“More or less.”

“But that’s…” Riva looked to the others in the room, no doubt trying to determine whether this was a prank at her expense. “How do you do it? How much do you see?”

“Anything I want to. The trick is to look into somebody’s eyes, though sometimes I need to—”

“Did you use it on me?” Riva’s strained, shaking voice was shot through with panic. “Lexi, did you?”

“Of course not. I haven’t read you, Riva. I’d never do that.”

“She’s telling the truth,” said Kade, his throat tight. Something very bad was happening here. “You can trust her.”

“You should have told me.” Riva had begun to cry, and her words came with difficulty. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

Lexi reached for Riva’s arm. “Babe, I swear, I never—”

Riva took a hasty step backward, and Lexi touched nothing but air. “I need to be alone. Don’t follow me.” With the clumsy haste of somebody overwhelmed, she ran from the room.

Lexi remained where she was, her hand still extended. “What did I do?” It had been a long time since Kade had heard her sound so plaintive. “Kade, what did I do?”

It had been even longer since she’d turned to him for support. “She’s scared,” he said. “You would be too.”

“We need to go talk to her,” said Callie, whose eyes had already welled with sympathetic tears. “Come on, Zeke.” She rushed from the room, and Zeke—after a guilty glance at Lexi—hurried after her.

“Shit.” Lexi slouched against a bench and sighed. “I know she’s hiding something, but I’d never invade her privacy. Never.” She glared at Isaac, who had resumed his muttering. “Can you shut the fuck up?”

Looking terrified, Isaac shambled up the stairs. Now it was just the two of them.

“Do her feelings matter that much to you?” said Kade.

“Of course not.” The bitterness in Lexi’s voice suggested otherwise. “Yeah, I’ve used the chip on her. I can’t help it, can’t switch it off. Every time I look at her, it hits me straightaway how fucking unhappy she’s been. When she smiles, Kade, you have no idea. I’d forgotten what it feels like to do that for somebody. It’s like it was with you and me.”

So she did remember. That fact alone was enough to keep any words from escaping Kade’s throat.

“I’m fucked now. I had a job. A reputation. It’s all gone.” Lexi stared at her reflection in the polished bench top. “And now you’re all getting hunted because of me. But it’s not my fault, okay? Fuck all of you. It’s not my fault.” She fled up the stairwell, while Kade watched her leave, helpless and aching.

* * *

He found Riva in her quarters. She was cross-legged at the foot of her bunk, her cheeks smeared with tears and eyeliner. “Can I come in?”

Her subdued nod seemed acknowledgement enough. After considering his options, Kade crouched by the bed. It gave Riva the advantage of looking down at him, and when someone was this upset, every little thing helped.

“Callie and Zeke came to visit me too,” said Riva, her voice thick. “But I sent them away.”

“But you don’t mind me being here?”

“I’ve wanted to talk to you since you arrived. Lexi treats you differently to everyone else. Every time she looks at you, she seems older. Tired.”

“Yes.” Kade touched Riva’s wrist. “But we’ll talk about me and her another day. For now, try to understand. For better or worse, the implant is part of her. She can’t turn it off, and she can’t help reading people. Right now, she’s grieving for the pain she’s caused you.”

“I know. But I feel naked. You can’t imagine what it’s like to be this vulnerable.”

If only she knew. But now wasn’t the time. “Well, you can’t imagine how much I envy you.”

Riva blinked. “What do you mean?”

“You don’t know how much I’ve missed…” Kade’s voice cracked. Damn, this was hard. “Don’t push Lexi away. She’ll respect your secrets.”

“This isn’t just any secret. I don’t want to hide it or be ashamed, but I also don’t want her to look at me differently. If she finds out, she will.” Riva wiped away a fresh tear. “I wanted this to be something good. It’s been so long since I had anything good.”

Even with her stained, glistening face, Riva remained beautiful. A defiant misfit who refused to be broken, even though this world so often seemed purely a tool for breaking. Little wonder Lexi was protective of her.

“You’re probably confused why she had that augmentation installed,” Kade said. “Given it should almost certainly have killed her.”

“No. I’ve already guessed. She wanted to die.”

Beautiful and perceptive. “We grew up together. Her, me, and her cousin, Ash. I was the runt, always getting in their way. Lexi was the brave one, the schemer, getting us into and out of trouble. Ash was our leader. She kept us on the straight and narrow. Planned for the future. Found ways for us to be clothed and fed. If it weren’t for her, Lexi would’ve disappeared into some gang or other, and I’d be…God knows.”

“What happened to Ash?” Riva spoke gently, as if she were the one who’d come here to give consolation. “Is she dead?”

“Yes, but I can’t talk much about that right now. I’m raw enough as it is. What I can say is that Ash and I became lovers, and Lexi ended up on the outside. She became jealous, I suppose. Alienated. And when Ash was killed, she blamed it on me. I share her view.”

“Was it really your fault, or are you just punishing yourself?”

“The way she died, how could I not want to punish—” Kade ran a hand across his face. The knot in his throat was suffocating. “Lexi couldn’t cope. But true to form, instead of putting a gun in her mouth, she flipped a coin.”

“Project Sky.”

“She can see into my thoughts. That means she knows how heartbroken I am. How much I still love her. All my repentance, my grief, my loneliness, she can feel that with me. And she still won’t forgive me.” Kade exhaled in an attempt to break the knot, but it only cost him more precious air.

“Kade…”

“She never expected to live, understand? When the implant succeeded, she came back and lived like a ghost. You know how there are spirits in mythology who can’t forgive the living because they envy them the warmth of their blood, the beating of their hearts? That’s how Lexi sees me. She hates that I kept my faith, that I’m still fighting for the cause that Ash and I believed in. The cause that took both of us from her. And like every angry ghost, she can’t roam far from the place she died.”

“But she seems so confident.”

“That’s her glamor, her shield. She’s always had it. As kids, we’d see her prowling the streets like she owned them, only to find her crying herself to sleep the very same night. Now we’re not there to comfort her, I suspect she doesn’t let herself cry that way anymore.”

Riva closed her eyes. “What do I do?”

“Trust her. She’ll help you bear this, no matter how heavy the burden. I know that to be true.” Kade rose to his feet, a little unsteady. “Just because she’s leaving for Port Venn, that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t enjoy what time with her you can. If I could have just one more day with Ash…”

It was suddenly too much, and he left while he could still see through the coming blur.