How to Slim Down in Fourteen Days

1579

“An excellent and approued thing to make them slender, that are grosse. Let them eate three or foure cloues of Garlick, with as much of Bread and butter euery morning and euening, first and last, neyther eating nor drinking of three or fowre howers after their taking of it in the morning for the space of fouretene dayes at the least: and drinke euery daye three good draftes of the decoction of Fennel, that is: of the water wherein Fennell is sodde, and well streyned, fowretene daies after at the least, at morning, noone and night. I knewe a man that was maruelous grosse, and could not go a quarter of a myle, but was enforst to rest him a doosen tymes at the least: that with this medicine tooke away his grosnes, and after coulde iourney verye well on foote.”

Thomas Lupton, A Thousand Notable Things

The Garlic Bread Cleanse: pure genius. After fourteen days of this regimen you’ll be rid of that pesky grossenesse and ready to hit the beach. On foote.