How to Ride a Horse

c. 1260

“And if you go by horse, watch out for false steps; and if you go in the city, I remind you to go very courteously. Ride nicely, with your head a little downcast, rather than riding rampant with vulgarity; and don’t look at the heights of each house that you find; watch out that you don’t move like a man from the country; don’t slide like an eel, but go steadily on the way and among the people.”

Brunetto Latini, Il Tesoretto

Not everyone is cut out for city driving: either keep your rampant vulgarity in check, or slither back where you came from.