How to Cure Gas

1685

“Against the Wind in the Belly. Apply a living Tench to the Patients Navel, the Head being upwards towards the Stomach; and tye it fast on with a Napkin; and there leave it twenty four hours, till it be dead; then bury it in the Dung, and you will see the Wind will vanish.”

Nicolas Lemery, Modern Curiosities of Art and Nature

If anyone asks why you have a dying fish strapped to your abdomen, just explain that it’s for your wind problem. I promise they’ll leave you alone.

How to Fart, 1530, here.