Judge Louis DeLacy had released Aunt Aggie early the morning after her incarceration, as soon as he was told how she’d wound up in jail. He was not about to allow her to spend another moment there, he said. She was tearful as she left Celia in the jail cell, promising to visit as often as they would allow her to.
Celia’s peace remained, and manifested itself as compassion for Nick when he finally got in to see her. He looked tired and uncertain, and she saw the doubt about her in his eyes. She realized vaguely that if she had seen that look in his eyes yesterday, she would have been crushed. But today, she knew better than to blame him. She hugged him as he came into her cell, and pointed him to the only chair in the room. She sat across from him on the cot.
“I know what you must be thinking, Nick,” she said. “I know everybody in town must think I’m absolutely guilty. I mean, how could I not be, with all the evidence against me?”
“I don’t think you’re guilty, Celia,” Nick said weakly.
It was obvious that he was lying. She hated seeing him in this position, and almost wished he hadn’t come. “Don’t lie, Nick. Not for me.”
He drew in a deep breath, and his face changed. Suddenly, she saw the real Nick, the one who wasn’t acting, the one who was honest even when it hurt. “Okay, Celia,” he said. “I’ll be straight with you. I don’t know what to think about you anymore.”
She had believed she was ready for that, but when they came, the words still stung her. “Why would you think anything other than what you’ve always thought?”
“Because I haven’t always known the whole story.”
“Yes, you have,” she said. “What you haven’t known is all the old allegations. But they weren’t truth. What you’ve known about me is truth.”
She could tell that he struggled between his ministerial facade and the humanity within him. It was what she loved about Nick—the fact that he was so spiritual, yet so human…so close to God…yet so like herself.
“I have to ask you something,” Nick said.
“Anything, Nick. I don’t have any secrets.”
“Well, you seem to have had some. A lot of things no one knew about you until all this blew up.”
“I understand how that could make you suspicious,” she said. “But you’ve got to understand that I had a right to start fresh. I was wrongly accused. I didn’t need to drag that around for the rest of my life. If I had done something wrong to deserve that, fine. But I didn’t. So I left it behind me and I pressed on.”
“I can see that,” Nick said. “But the question I want to ask you is more immediate, and even more personal. It’s about Lee Barnett.”
“What about him?” she asked.
His eyes were direct, probing, as he asked the question. “Why did you go see him yesterday?”
Her heart jolted. How had Nick found that out? Had the police been talking out of turn? Had they been gossiping her business all over town?
“How did you know about that?”
“Stan told me.”
Her heart crashed, and despair hovered over it, waiting for an opening so it could move in and fill her with the darkness she’d stumbled through yesterday. But then she told herself that it was no surprise. She knew he had seen the picture.
It was still the Lord’s battle, not hers. The realization enabled her to hold the despair at bay.
“Nick, I’m gonna tell you what happened yesterday, and I’m not telling you to defend myself, because I’m innocent and I don’t need to defend myself. But I want you to know the real story.”
Nick waited.
“I went to Lee Barnett because I wanted to find out what he was up to,” she said. “I didn’t step one foot in his apartment. I didn’t touch him except to slap him once when I got so angry that I couldn’t hold it in any longer. He grabbed me and shook me, and that must be when Vern snapped the picture. Now, if anyone wants to know the truth about that encounter, I suggest they go to Vern and ask him what he saw before and after that embrace. Put that picture in context. Ask him to see what else is on that film. Look at our faces, Nick.”
Nick was quiet as the words sank in. He seemed to be listening, seriously wanting to believe her. She desperately wanted him to.
“Nick, please tell Stan the truth. He must know in his heart that I didn’t do this.”
Nick looked down at his feet, and she could see that he still struggled with what to believe about her.
Her expression crashed. “Nick, I am so sorry for you.”
“For me?” he asked.
“Yes,” she said. “When this is all over and I’ve been acquitted of any guilt, and you see how hard someone has worked to set me up, it’ll be one more time when you beat yourself up for not doing the right thing.”
He sat there, his face vulnerable, exposed. She knew what was going through his mind. He had to be thinking about all the times he had failed. All the inadequacies, all the mistakes. It was what made him such a good preacher…and what made him so human.
“I’m gonna forgive you, Nick,” she whispered. “And when you feel guilty for doubting me, I want you to remember that, if it weren’t for your teaching, I may never have come to Christ. Yes, Stan led me, but you closed the deal, Nick. I’m tremendously grateful to you. So when you find out that I’m innocent, that everything I’ve said is true, and you get mad at yourself, I want you to remember that what you did for me five years ago was a whole lot more important than this.”
Nick’s eyes filled with tears, and he set his elbows on his knees and cupped his face in his hands. Finally, he looked up at her. “Celia, I love you. I want to believe you. I want to know that you know Christ, that all of this has not been a terrible act. Because if it is, then my judgment is horrible and my discernment is pretty lousy. I need to believe you.”
“Then do it,” she said. “Believe me.”
He looked into her eyes, long and hard, and she knew that in his mind he probably prayed for eyes like God’s eyes, to see into her and know if she lied. And suddenly she realized that God had told him in words that she had not been able to utter that she was innocent.
The tension in his face melted away, and more tears filled his eyes. He seemed to straighten, and his eyes were softer as he regarded her. “I believe you, Celia. I do.”
“Then help Stan to believe me,” she said. “Please Nick. I need you to help Stan believe me.”
“I’ll do everything I can,” he told her. “I promise.”
She gave him a hug, and he started to get up. “Nick? Tell him to trust in the Lord with all his might. And then he can trust in me.”
Nick nodded and left her alone.