Devin and Rocky sat on one side of the campfire, Jahmin and Eva on the other. It was so quiet the crackle of the fire sounded like fireworks. Every now and then Rocky cast a sidelong look at Devin, but she kept her gaze fixed on the grass between her feet. Eva raised her eyebrows at Jahmin who shook his head. No. Eva ignored him.
‘So, who here has a problem with Jahmin being dead?’
Jahmin closed his eyes. ‘Shut it, Evs.’
‘No, I won’t bloody shut it!’ She turned to Rocky. ‘We heard you whispering. Telling nasty little secrets to each other. So, come on, out with it. We’re all dying to know what you really think.’
‘It wasn’t like that …’ Devin faltered.
‘Really? I disagree. I think it was exactly like that.’
‘Don’t have a go at her, she’s not the only one.’ Rocky flicked a glance at Jahmin, his expression mutinous. ‘Sorry, mate.’
‘Mate!’ cried Eva. ‘Some mate. Thinking Jahmin’s, what, a freak of nature or something?’
‘Well, yes,’ said Rocky sarcastically. ‘Don’t you?’
‘He can’t help it! You wouldn’t be an asshole about him if he was mentally ill or whatever.’
‘What’s that got to do with it?’
‘Or maybe you would, only you’d do it behind his back because you’re a creepy, little backstabber.’
‘We weren’t backstabbing!’ Devin cried. ‘We were just talking.’
‘Talking shit about someone behind their back is backstabbing, Devin,’ said Eva coldly. ‘But I know you’re not exactly well up on the niceties of social interaction.’
‘Because going around spying on people and listening to their private conversations is so awesomely nice,’ Rocky spat.
‘Oh, so it’s my fault you’re a heartless, nasty piece of shit?’
‘No, it’s your fault you’re a stupid bitch!’
Eva and Rocky were standing now, barely a foot apart, yelling in each other’s faces.
Jahmin leapt up and pushed between them. ‘Stop it!’
A shaft of sunlight pierced the canopy and lit up Jahmin’s face, his skin unnaturally pale. Eva, red-faced and angry, shook off Jahmin’s hand and flounced off to the other side of the clearing. Rocky, breathing heavily and scowling, sat down with a thump next to Devin, who hid her face in her hands.
‘I know what I am,’ said Jahmin.
Eva opened her mouth to speak, but Jahmin raised his voice and continued. ‘Rocky’s right, Evs. I’m dead. I don’t have any right to be here. I don’t enjoy any of the things that make living worthwhile. Food, sleep, pain, they’re all just words now. You don’t know how much you miss breathing until you don’t have to do it. And I didn’t know before … I didn’t know how your heart determines the rhythm of your day. That little internal drumbeat. It’s gone. It’s all gone.’
Eva again opened her mouth to speak, and he impatiently held up a hand.
‘Yes, I’m dead. And I don’t mind being fully dead. This half-life just isn’t enough. But if you guys are going to get home at all, we need to know what Seddon’s up to. They could be anywhere. And now they know Idelle saw that thing, they’re bound to think she might not be the only one. If you guys can just wait for a couple of days; hide out here where it’s safe. I want to go back and try and find out what’s going on. My dad works for Seddon, everything we have is because of Seddon. And Idelle was murdered.’
He looked at each of them in turn, a small smile on his lips. ‘I know it’s a lot to ask. But in two days we can all go home together. Cos if I’m going to die properly, it would be nice to have mates around.’
There was silence. It lasted a long time. And then Eva burst into tears.
