Chapter Thirty-eight
Patricia dabbed at her lipstick and smacked her lips. She twisted in the mirror and shimmied. Dressed in her form-fitting crème dress and gold-specked heels, she knew she looked good. Good enough to eat. With a light swing of her hips, Patricia ran her hands down her body.
She was ready for church.
Today she was going early enough to sit in the front row. Right next to Lady Gina Ward, the pastor’s wife. If she played her cards right, she and Gina would have more in common than their salvation.
Patricia hid a sly smile and opened the guestroom door. She stepped out, careful not to make a sound. It didn’t matter if she woke Ryan because she didn’t have anything to say to him. Not after she had been with Tim.
And not now when she had bigger and better things on her mind, like laying the groundwork for her seduction of Pastor Ward.
She clutched her Dolce & Gabbana purse and made it out of the house without anyone noticing. Before starting up her car, the Holy Spirit spoke to her.
Don’t return to your vomit!
Patricia released a sigh of consternation. She knew 2 Peter 2:22: “The dog is turned to his own vomit again; and the sow that was washed to her wallowing in the mire.”
She closed her mind to the implication behind the verse, telling herself, I’m not a dog or a pig. I’m a human being. The fight with her body was very real.
She had tried and failed. Miserably. So why fight it?
Since she had given in to her temptation two days ago, however, she had grown tired of Tim. He was a vigorous but unimaginative lover. If I’m going to keep falling off the proverbial wagon, I need to do it with class. Continuing a fling with Tim would be so . . . cliché. She also worked with him. Too messy. So, after three hot bouts of heavy lovemaking, she fed him the “I can’t live with myself and continue betraying my husband” line and cut him off completely.
Luckily for her, Tim didn’t push. Maybe because he’d gotten what he wanted. She yawned. She didn’t know . . . and she didn’t care.
To be successful at adultery, Patricia needed to find someone married with as much to lose as she did. Someone like her hot, look-at-me-flash-my-smile pastor. Pastor Ward heard from God. You couldn’t get a much higher connection than that.
A warning hit her spirit.
Touch not the Lord’s anointed!
Patricia trembled. I won’t touch him. If my plan works, he’ll be touching me.
Her sassy answer to the Spirit of God should have clued her in on how far off the path she had gone. Patricia pulled down the visor. “You’ve got this. Maybe after one time with him, you’ll be all right again.”
She pumped up her courage and headed to Zion’s Hill.
Patricia sauntered down the aisle just as the praise and worship leader took the stage. She spotted Gina and Pastor Ward’s children, Trey and Epiphany, in the front row, which was generally empty. Today, that was going to change. Patricia ignored the usher who pointed out an empty space three rows back. She strutted to the front row and settled at the end of the row.
From behind her, she heard whisperings, “Who sent her up there?” “She has a lot of nerve” “She isn’t family,” but Patricia held her head high. The view was better from up front.
Pastor Ward zoned in on her. Patricia could have sworn he hid a smile. Good. His smile indicated a sense of humor.
And perhaps even some genuine interest.
She glanced toward Gina. The First Lady winked at her. Patricia placed a phony smile on her face before turning her focus on worship. Before she knew it, she was caught up in the praise.
Patricia closed her eyes and enjoyed the moment in God’s presence. Why couldn’t she stay in this euphoria all the time? In church, it was so easy to serve God. To do the right thing. Burdens lightened and nothing seemed insurmountable. But when she left the building, she encountered the real world. She remembered her problems were still there keeping her up at night.
Soon the music died down, and the ushers roamed the aisles carrying offering plates. Patricia tapped her purse. It was time to put her insane plan in motion. Gathering her courage, she pulled out two tithing envelopes. One bore Pastor Ward’s name written in her bold scrawl.
You’re insane.
Before she could think twice, Patricia dropped them both into the velvet pouch. The deed was done. There was no turning back now.
She watched with fascination as the ushers directed everyone to stand and Deacon Broderson blessed the offering. She stifled a giggle because the small item hidden inside the envelope had now been well blessed.
After the ushers took the funds to the back room, Patricia ignored the announcements while watching for the head usher’s return. Sure enough, the head usher brought her envelope to Pastor Ward. He tore open the envelope before taking a sip of water.
A millisecond passed before his eyes widened, and Pastor Ward instantly spewed the contents of his mouth onto the floor. Deacon Broderson rushed to offer him a napkin. Pastor Ward blotted his chin and suit before piercing her with his stare.
Patricia squirmed. For the first time she second-guessed putting the tiny pair of panties in the envelope. What was she thinking? Pastor Ward stormed toward the podium. Every part of her shivered with uncertainty. He was going to out her in front of everyone!
But Pastor Ward went right into the Word.
Patricia breathed a sigh of relief. All throughout his message, which she would never be able to recall, she wondered what Pastor Ward would do.
She didn’t have long to wonder. As soon as the message ended and the congregation filed out, an usher approached her.
“Pastor Ward needs to see you,” he said.
Patricia stepped into the bathroom to freshen up. She reapplied her lip gloss, sprayed some body mist, and did a quick underarm check. Satisfied, she made her way to Pastor’s office.
She found Pastor Ward seated behind his desk. He gave her a warm smile.
Patricia smiled, stepped inside, and closed the door.
“Hello, Patricia.”
Patricia’s eyes widened when she heard Gina’s voice.
“First Lady,” Patricia said. “I didn’t know you’d be here.”
Pastor Ward gestured for her to sit. “Well, you’ve managed to get my attention in the most unusual way.”
Patricia saw him reach for the envelope, and her mouth popped open. She watched him drop the scrap of underwear onto his desk.
“I thought it prudent to have my wife with me when I asked you to explain this . . . gift.”
Patricia didn’t need a mirror to tell her that her cheeks were burning. She swung her gaze between the two, expecting to see anger but instead saw pity.
Patricia’s eyes filled with tears. She covered her face.
Gina rose to get her a wad of tissues.
“I’m sorry,” Patricia whispered. “I don’t know why I did that.”
Gina patted her back. “You do know why. You think this is the first time?”
Patricia’s head popped up. “Someone’s put underwear in the offering plate before?”
Gina shook her head. “No, that would be a first. And last.”
Patricia understood the warning. The First Lady was giving her a pass this time. There most likely wouldn’t be a next time.
Gina kissed her husband full on the lips and departed leaving them alone—with the door wide open.
Patricia’s respect for the shorter woman intensified. If the roles were reversed, she would have been giving someone a beat down.
Pastor Ward asked for her undivided attention and opened with prayer. When he concluded, he asked, “What’s going on with you, Sister Oakes?”
“The results came in. Karlie is Ryan’s daughter.”
Pastor Ward’s eyes softened. “I knew there had to be a reason for your behavior. Your action this morning was so out of character.”
Patricia wished she could sit there and say the results were to blame, but she knew her secret pain. “No, Pastor. It is more in tune with my character. My true nature.” Patricia’s shoulders slumped.
Pastor arched his eyebrows, waiting on an explanation. Patricia took a deep breath and told Pastor of her sexual addiction and past affairs before Ryan.
“You need to tell your husband,” he said. “Ryan loves you enough to forgive. I believe the truth will make your marriage better than before. It won’t be easy at first, but no good marriage ever is without struggle.” He provided the name of a Christian counselor to help her get back on track.
Properly chastised, Patricia departed. She would see the counselor Pastor Ward recommended, but she had no intentions of following his advice about Ryan. Patricia wasn’t telling Ryan anything.
Her cell rang. She saw Timothy’s face on the screen and answered.
“Come quickly! Anna had another seizure!”