Kennedy took some solace in the fact that it hadn’t required any seduction on her part to land her in Knox’s bed. Well, okay, in his arms. Because at the rate they were going they might not even make it to the frumpy quilt-covered mattress bracketed by an outdated brass-bar head and footboard over in the corner of the cabin.
Knox’s urgency was tinged with desperation. It salved the part of her that had never recovered from him so easily walking away from what they’d had. It also let her conscience off the hook, because she felt like she hadn’t coerced him into doing something he wasn’t interested in. That was doubly important when she was about to betray him as he’d done to her so many years ago.
“Stop thinking so much.” Knox rasped before nipping her neck, right below her ear. “For once in your life, just feel. Live in the moment.”
Damn, the reverberations of his primal touch shot through her body, straight to her toes, which curled in her boots. As much as she kept trying to convince herself she was sacrificing her better sense for the Shields, she couldn’t help but melt a little inside as she stared straight into Knox’s emerald eyes. His face, his body, his soul—every bit of that had changed, hardened. But his eyes were so familiar they threatened to break her.
Kennedy reached for Knox, tunneling her hands into the sides of his reddish hair, remembering how silky smooth it felt running between her fingers. It was shorter these days, neater, but still as soft. The only part of him she could say that about.
His arms were like steel as they bracketed her, his forearms planted from elbow to wrist on either side of her shoulders before he leaned on one and put the other to good use. He caressed the entire length of her arm, which was bared in the candy-pink tank top she wore, before briefly squeezing her hand.
And as he did, his lips brushed hers. Both of them gasped before he bounced back, this time sealing their mouths completely. Instinct took over from logic as she surrendered, allowing him access to her entire being when she should have been guarding herself from the influence he obviously still held over her body and, likely, her emotions.
There would be plenty of time to kick herself for this later. So she might as well make it count while she could. Kennedy slid her hands lower so they cupped his neck and used the grip to keep him close and devour him even as he did the same to her.
Knox leaned in, his thigh nudging her pussy, making her rub up against him in a sinuous motion she didn’t know she was capable of until her body craved more.
With each kiss he erased a year of the time they’d spent apart. They might be strangers now, but her body recognized his and remembered their teenaged make out sessions. This time she didn’t intend to stop without having all of him. Kisses and heavy petting weren’t going to be enough to put out the fire he lit inside her as if she’d been kindling drying out without him.
“You smell so good. Clean.” He inhaled, his nose buried in her hair as he caught his breath. His parted lips brushed the skin of her neck as he murmured to her, “I’ve never forgotten that.”
Knox had grown up in shitty circumstances. His mom had been a kid herself when she’d had him. Passed around to relatives who had too many of their own mouths to feed to keep him off the streets for long, Knox had fallen through the cracks. He’d always been obsessed with basics she took for granted, like the concept of leftovers or freshly shampooed hair, and it seemed that hadn’t changed. So why hadn’t he taken the chance he’d had to alter the path his life was on? Why had he thrown it all away—her love included—and gone right back to the gutter he’d nearly clawed his way out of?
She knew the answer, but as someone who’d never experienced addiction, it was still sometimes impossible for her to wrap her head around it.
Then again, she’d never had sex with a man before either and here she was, completely sure of how to react to the things he was doing to her body despite her lack of previous real-life exposure to those stimuli.
Kennedy put her extensive knowledge of anatomy to good use. She shoved her hand under the faded T-shirt that hugged his ripped torso and ran her thumbs along the ridge formed by the tendon that stretched from his iliac crest toward his groin, fashioning a delicious V pointing straight to his cock. Then she worked upward, bunching the thin cotton of his shirt in her hands as the backs of her knuckles skimmed his washboard abs. Damn. He might have been underweight but his lack of body fat put all of him on display.
It didn’t take long before she whipped the fabric from him, his hands halting their roaming only long enough for her to rid him of the shirt. He didn’t even bother to kick off his boots before unbuttoning and unzipping his pants.
She breathed a sigh of relief. Hopefully he wouldn’t bother taking the time to fully undress her, because being naked with him would have made her feel too vulnerable. Even if she was a physician and had seen more bodies than she could count, exposing herself to someone else—him especially—wasn’t something she was good at…or had much practice with.
In that moment, she imagined what it would be like if she’d given in to the equally as strong attraction between her and Marcus any of the times they’d had the opportunity to be intimate. She couldn’t imagine him ever settling for something this perfunctory. No, Marcus would be the kind of man to savor every stitch he removed from her and delight her with hours of foreplay before he ever gave in to his own desires. He was a legend, a man built from patience.
She shuddered, wondering what it would be like to have the best of both worlds—Knox’s passion and Marcus’s thoroughness. Hey, why not? Lots of her friends had committed poly relationships.
Besides, thinking of Marcus now, knowing he was practically there right on the other side of the comms and somewhere outside in the scrub, made her so much more secure and confident as she took this wild leap. She hoped all the porn she’d watched and nights spent with her arsenal of toys, pleasuring herself, would be enough to make her attempts at fucking Knox less laughable. Hell, he’d already had more experience at fifteen than she had now closing in on thirty.
She figured she wasn’t going to have to worry about much except letting him take the lead when he leveled her with the most intense stare she’d ever seen and shoved his hands under her skirt. His fingers wrapped around the lace of her panties. “You don’t care if I destroy these, do you?”
She gulped and shook her head no.
He ripped her panties from her and had her hoisted over his shoulder before she could fully register his intent. His broad palm on her ass kept her securely in place as he marched the three short steps to the bed.
He tossed her onto it, the metal frame creaking ominously as she bounced, then followed her. Except this time he didn’t stop at kissing her. Sure, that’s where he started, his tongue swiping along hers before he yanked her tank top down so that her breasts, small enough not to require a bra, were exposed, smooshed up and together by the cotton of her shirt.
He took a second or two to fondle and suck on them before slithering between her legs. His head disappeared beneath her skirt and then she nearly forgot to think, forgot why she was there, and that this wasn’t just another lascivious dream of hers that he was starring in. No, that was his tongue, exploring every fold of her labia before doing something none of her toys had ever come close to simulating on her flesh.
She moaned and writhed beneath him, trying to press herself tighter to his face when that would have been impossible. Around the time he pressed two fingers deep inside her, Kennedy knew it wouldn’t take much more for her to shatter. She tried to stifle her wild cries, fully aware the entire team—and one man in particular—could hear every catch of her breath, whimper, and moan.
But it was no use. Knox was as good at pleasuring her as she’d always imagined he would be.
“So sweet,” he growled against her. “Going to be heaven on my cock.”
Kennedy blinked back to reality. Right. This wasn’t about her. Shit. “Then fuck me.”
“Not until you’re ready.” He redoubled his efforts, making her quiver around him.
“Been waiting for half my life. No more.” And although it was the truth, she regretted not being able to linger, to fully savor the moment. This certainly wasn’t how she’d ever imagined losing her virginity. Though she’d be lying if she said she wasn’t thrilled it would finally be out of the way, a mental obstacle removed. Maybe if she could view sex like Sola or some of her other friends did—a casual physical relief—she wouldn’t be so damn lonely or anxious about sharing intimacy with someone she wasn’t in love with anymore.
Maybe Marcus…
Kennedy shook herself when Knox groaned and rose up over her. He ripped open his jeans and shoved them halfway to his knees. Still wearing them and his boots, he covered her. The thick length of his shaft settled between her legs, her skirt the only thing separating them.
Kennedy was a doctor. She knew damn well Knox had probably taken chances with his health. Maybe even shared needles with people. She lunged for the purse she’d dropped on the floor in the thankfully tiny room and took out a condom, handing it to him.
“You always carry those?” One of his scarred brows rose.
“I’m a responsible adult, yes.” She silently dared him to make some stupid comment about it. So what if she’d gotten them fresh from the store on her way to this meet up? She could hook up with whomever she damn well pleased. The last thing she planned to do was let him know that he’d ruined her for relationships with anyone else, made it impossible for her to open up to men in general, and one specific guy in particular.
Marcus. Kennedy bit her cheek to keep from wincing. At least she wouldn’t have to worry about resisting temptation around him anymore. After this assignment he probably wasn’t going to be interested in her anymore. The loss she felt at that threatened to distract her from Knox ripping open the condom and rolling it down his thick shaft.
In that moment, she realized how unfair she’d been to both herself and her partner. She respected Marcus, desired him, and had smothered those feelings because she’d been afraid.
Son of a bitch. This was not the time for revelations.
“Second thoughts?” Knox asked her.
Sola jumped in over the comms. “Bail if you’re not one-hundred percent. We’ve got the cabin surrounded. We’ll get him one way or another.”
It shocked her when Marcus whispered into her ear while the rest of the team—Jordan and James especially, who both usually directed their missions—was dead silent. “Don’t let him out. Not yet. You’ve almost got him. He could take you hostage, hurt you before we could get to him. And it sounds like you’re having fun. Go ahead, Kennedy. Enjoy yourself. It’s win-win. If you can tie him up like we talked about, even better.”
So he didn’t care that she fucked her ex if it meant capturing him peacefully?
Kennedy wasn’t sure if she was thrilled or utterly discouraged by that.
Still, she couldn’t deny that Marcus was right. That’s why they’d formulated this plan in the first place. It was better to do this without resistance. Maybe after she wrung Knox dry he’d be too chill to put up a fight. For the sake of her friends and for him, she wanted to do this the easy way.
Kennedy ignored the Shields and responded to Knox. “Nope.”
She took his sheathed cock in hand and aimed it between her legs.
“Good. Because I’d like to have at least one thing I never thought possible before I die. I don’t deserve this, but I’m going to take it anyway because we both know I’m selfish as fuck.”
Knox blanketed her, shoving up her skirt and fitting the blunt head of his cock to her opening. Kennedy held her breath and spread her legs wider to accommodate his hips between her thighs. He settled in, fusing them an inch or so before pausing to make sure she was okay.
It was different than she’d expected. He was warm and a little softer than some of her toys, though plenty stiff to get the job done. One taste was enough to know she wanted everything he could feed her.
He might still believe—as he had when they were young—that he was a terrible person, unworthy of all the things she’d wanted to share with him, but just like then, she saw the hints of the man he truly was…or could be…glimmering beneath his street life surface.
“Good?” he asked though his jaw twitched with the effort of holding himself in check.
Kennedy would have said yes regardless, but she was shocked when she let herself focus on the pleasure that radiated from where they were joined, her body accommodating him with only the perfect amount of delicious ache. She nodded, then reached around to grab his ass and drag him closer. Thankfully, time and her toys had done away with whatever might have remained of her hymen and he seemed to have no clue he was in uncharted territory.
Knox cursed, then sank inside her, wedging his cock into her and opening her to her first taste of a man within her. It was glorious. Relief—both physical and mental—coupled with ecstasy, making her shudder as he worked fully within her.
“You’re everything I always imagined you would be,” he murmured before kissing her sweetly.
Oh hell, no. That would not do. She had given him her body, but there was no way she would let him steal her heart again.
Kennedy shoved one of his shoulders and rolled hard to that side. She wound up perched on top of him. His cock speared impossibly deeper as she planted her hands on his chest and began to grind on him. His eyes blazed as he watched her take control, and to her surprise, he didn’t try to wrest it back from her.
He let her use him, pleasure herself with his body, and lifted his hands to the bars of the headboard, holding on as if to keep himself from reaching for her and stopping the display of power she hadn’t realized she was capable of.
In that moment, she knew she had Knox. She snatched her purse from where she’d dropped it on the bed beside him and used the long leather shoulder strap to bind his wrists and hands to the headboard. He thrashed but didn’t come free, then sagged, resigned.
“Didn’t realize you were into that.” He grinned up at her, his stiff cock buried inside her proof that he didn’t mind in the least.
“Me either.” She shrugged then rocked, her body refusing to settle now that she’d riled it beyond the point of no return. Kennedy rose and fell over him, grinding on him so that her clit rubbed against the flat pad of muscle above his cock.
It only took three strokes before her entire body exploded around him. Whether from the taboo nature of fucking him while her teammates observed them, the lifelong fantasy of having him to herself come true, or the fact that she’d never gotten to experience this carnal pleasure with anyone before, it all came to a head in one sonic boom of rapture.
“Yes. Hell yes. Come on me, Kennedy. You’re so fucking tight milking my cock like that. Now untie me so I can fuck you right,” Knox growled.
“You have him bound?” James asked then.
“Yes,” Kennedy panted, but not to Knox. She was talking to James. Which became apparent when she gave them more explicit directions. “We’re good. Come and get him.”
“Wow. Seriously?” Knox blinked a few times then yanked at his bonds, still unable to break free. “I didn’t think you had it in you to go through with it. My bad for underestimating you.”
Kennedy didn’t bother to respond when they both apparently knew she’d betrayed him and everything was happening so fast. Her body still rang with the reverberations of her climax and they only had seconds before the Shields swarmed the room.
She pressed her hand to the side of her head, hoping to mute her comms or muffle them at least. “You didn’t come with me?”
“Was going to make sure you had more than one lousy orgasm first. Give me some fucking credit.” Knox grimaced, his erection twitching within her, setting off aftershocks. He smiled sadly up at her, breaking her heart all over again. “I’m glad you enjoyed yourself, but you didn’t have to do this, you know. Not that I’m complaining, use me all you like, but I would have done whatever you asked if you’d been straight with me.”
“How did you know?” Kennedy felt her cheeks burn and her pleasure turned to shame. Her languid muscles stiffened, making it uncomfortable to hold his still-stiff cock inside her. She shifted and he slipped from within her, leaving her cold as his thick erection landed on his abdomen with a wet thud. “And why’d you let me tie you up? Why’d you—”
“Kennedy, you’re breaking up.” Jordan cut in. “Is he secure? Can we come in?”
She dropped her hand so the Shields could hear again as her body began to go numb.
“Don’t you think I’ve heard the rumors of who you work for, Goody Two Shoes?” Knox raised a brow. “Maybe I just wanted to fuck you.”
She might have slapped him if she hadn’t tried to manipulate him or if he hadn’t continued.
“Or maybe I want to cooperate. I admit I didn’t believe the rumors about you at first, but there was no way you showing up tonight was a coincidence. You’re not the same girl I knew once, now are you? You’re harder. Smarter. As sharp as one of your scalpels. But still sweet somewhere deep inside. It was worth it to find out for sure. You didn’t have to tie me up. I wouldn’t have run from you”
Knox licked his lips, which still glistened with her arousal.
“Shit! What are we waiting for? He knows. Go, go, go!” Marcus shouted as Kennedy heard a rustle from outside followed by the thud of boots on the rickety wooden steps of the cabin.
“You did last time. Fool me once, asshole.” She wanted to smack Knox upside his smarmy face, but she refused to cross that line. She hated the things he did to her. How he warped her values and weakened the qualities she respected in herself.
Just like he always had.
What bullshit. She’d barely finished fucking him, had gotten off without even returning the favor, and here she was acting like she was better than him, if only in her own mind.
Rage filled Kennedy, both at herself and at Knox. Together, they were toxic. Now and in the past too. Nothing had changed at all.
Kennedy whimpered and crawled off him backward, grabbing a sheet and wrapping it around her as Sola and Marcus burst into the cabin. Through the open door and windows she could see Nolan, Ransom, Levi, Liam, and Ace blocking every exit.
“At least I finally got a taste of that sweet pussy. Worth it.” Knox made a show of licking his glistening and swollen lips, humiliating her in front of her team and making her fists clench in the sheet.
Marcus apparently didn’t have the same standards she did, or the same self-restraint. Though his self-control had a legendary reputation, apparently even he had his limits. He strode to the bed and decked Knox, knocking him out cold.
“Damn it, Marcus,” Sola snarled as she rushed to Kennedy and wrapped her in a hug before fixing her shirt and skirt to protect what non-existent modesty Kennedy had left.
“He deserved it.” In fact, Marcus looked like he might not stop at a single punch.
“Of course he did. I wanted to be the one to do it,” Sola huffed as James muttered Amen across the comms.
“Is everything secure?” Jordan asked.
“Yeah, boss,” Nolan affirmed from his place just outside the door. “We’re going to collect our equipment then bring this douche back to the office with us so you can have a chat with him yourself.”
The office. The one attached to Kennedy’s apartment.
Fuck her life. Because the man she had once loved and now had come around while the guy he’d ruined her for listened and watched was about to be their damn neighbor.