I’m outside Nandos
when I see him shuffling up the road,
a backpack over one shoulder.
He waves at me.
But…
Oh, God.
He’s wearing a cape.
Like a proper cape –
black and buttoned up at the neck.
Where the hell did he get it?
And
what exactly did he think I meant
by doing a runner?
Maybe he thinks we’re gonna fight crime
instead of commit it.
Jesus.
‘All right, Batman,’ I say,
pulling on the cape’s collar.
He frowns.
‘Might get chilling at night, Jess,’ he says.
‘You look like you’re about to go to a bloody
Dungeons and Dragons convention,’ I tell him.
‘Talk about conspicuous.’
‘I not understand these words,’ he says.
‘I ready for running though.’
He lifts up a foot, so I can see he’s got his trainers on.
He’s beaming
but I don’t know what he’s so happy about.
Does he even know what we’re doing?
Does he get that we’re not running
to anything
but
running away
with nowhere to go.
‘Everything hunky dory,’ he says,
twisting his arm around
and
patting his backpack.
‘Don’t say hunky dory,’ I snap.
‘Hunky dory proper English words,’ he says.
‘Well, coming out of your mouth
it sounds like bullcrap,’ I say.
I’m being mean
but
I can’t help it.
He doesn’t seem to be taking this seriously and
I’m not running away with him
if all I’m gonna be doing is spending the next year
stopping him from sounding like a complete moron.
‘How much pounds you have?’ he asks.
I reach into the pocket of my blazer
and pull out a handful of tenners.
Nicu stares at the notes,
the Queen’s superior face glaring at us.
‘That all you find?’ he asks.
‘Well, what have you got,
Prince of Romania?’
He throws his backpack on the ground,
digs deep into it
and shows me.
‘Where the hell did you get all that?’
Wads of cash –
more money than I’ve seen in my life.
‘It not good?’ he asks.
‘Good?
It’s nuts, Nicu.
You are bloody Batman!’
He zips up the backpack
and puts his hands on his hips
like a real superhero.
‘Glad I making you happy, Jess,’
is all he says.