Cassidy’s heart did a strange little flip-flop as she pulled hard on the reins, halting the wagon in front of the house. Dell sat on the porch awaiting their return.
Jumping from the wagon, Tarah flounced inside without a word.
Dell raised a questioning eyebrow at Cassidy.
Shaking her head, she shrugged. No sense ruining the day if she could help it. And telling Dell she had caught his daughter with the likes of Johnny Cooper would serve no purpose right now. A twinge of guilt made Cassidy hesitate, but she pushed it back. After all, she reasoned, if Dell found out, he would beat the living daylights out of Johnny and send him packing. And if he did that, Tarah would never get over the despicable man. No. The girl had to see Johnny for what he was and make the decision herself.
“You getting down from there today?”
Cassidy glanced down. Dell stood with a hand extended, ready to help her from the wagon.
“Sorry,” she murmured, throwing him a sheepish grin.
“All right, everyone change out of your Sunday clothes and let’s get going,” Dell called, giving Cassidy support while she climbed down from the wagon.
“Everyone but you, that is. You keep that dress on.” His voice was low, husky, and filled with longing. He’d noticed. Cassidy’s heart went wild as his gaze caressed her. Was that love reflected in the blue depths of his eyes? Then why did he stay away? She pushed the disturbing thoughts aside for the moment and enjoyed walking to the house, hand in hand, with the man she loved.
Once inside, Dell left her to get the fishing poles while Cassidy busied herself collecting the picnic fare.
“Want me to carry anything for you?”
Cassidy glanced up in surprise to find Sam, hands in his pockets, staring red faced at his boots. Ah, he’s making up!
“Thanks, Sam. I’d appreciate it,” she said, keeping her voice steady as she handed him the platter laden with fried chicken.
“Smells good,” he said and walked carefully to the door, then turned to her. “Thanks for not snitching Luke out to Pa last night. He’d a got a lickin’ for sure.”
“He probably deserves one,” Cassidy said, giving him a wry smile in spite of herself. “Did he ever find the snake?”
“Nah, it’s long gone.” Sam shook his head. “We never thought you’d faint though. Scared us half to death.” With that, he left the house. Would wonders never cease?
Emily appeared at the kitchen door dressed in her everyday clothes, bonnet hanging by its strings around her neck. “Can Warrior come with us, Ma?”
Barefoot and wearing his new war bonnet as usual, Jack stood beside Emily. Each child stared at her with imploring eyes.
Tenderness for her youngest children welled up inside Cassidy, and she knew she could deny them nothing at this moment. “I don’t see why not,” she said with a smile. “He’d probably enjoy a day of splashing about in the creek.”
Jack let out a war whoop and threw his arms around Cassidy. “You’re the best ma ever!”
Tears stung her eyes as she watched the two children bound out the door, calling for the puppy.
Ellen limped into the kitchen next, and the two women made the final preparations for the picnic. After the wagon was loaded with family and food, Cassidy took a final peek around the kitchen and decided it was time to put her plans for Luke into action. She went to the spice cabinet and took down a small bag she had brought with her from Missouri. Tucking it into her apron pocket, she set out to join her impatient family.
A grinning Dell stood beside the wagon when Cassidy stepped onto the porch.
Cassidy’s heart leapt. He’d saddled Abby for her.
“Thought you might like to ride horseback today.”
“Oh yes, Dell. I would love it. Thank you.” She grabbed the reins and lifted a foot into the stirrup.
“Cassidy,” Ellen said cautiously.
“What?”
Ellen gave a pointed gaze at Cassidy’s stomach.
Maybe horseback wasn’t the best thing for the baby. “O–oh, right.” She placed her foot back on the ground and turned to Dell. “Thanks anyway, but I think I’d rather ride in the wagon today.”
With a small frown, he helped her up to the seat.
“I’ll ride Abby, Pa.” Tarah stood in the wagon and jumped down. “Since Cassidy doesn’t want to.”
“It’s your ma’s horse. You’ll have to ask her.”
Cassidy cringed at his reference to her as Tarah’s ma. She drew a breath, wondering what Tarah would say.
Eyes blazing, the girl turned to her. “May I?”
Exhaling in relief, Cassidy smiled. “Of course I don’t mind. It will do her some good to be ridden.”
“Thank you,” Tarah replied through gritted teeth. Taking the reins from her father, she mounted and headed off toward the creek.
Dell glanced after her with a puzzled frown, then climbed onto his own horse. “Do you want to explain what just happened between the two of you?” he asked.
“Oh, a little disagreement,” was all Cassidy said, and thankfully Dell dropped the matter.
“Let’s go, then,” he said, following Tarah’s lead.
They found a secluded spot surrounded by shady trees and tall prairie grass. Enlisting the help of all the children and Dell, Cassidy had the picnic ready in no time. They sat around a red-and-white-checkered tablecloth spread out on the ground. The tension seemed to fade away. Even Warrior had a feast of the chicken bones, and soon everyone was ready for dessert.
Cassidy cut the cake, serving Dell first, then Ellen, and continuing until everyone but Luke had a piece of the fluffy treat.
“Land sakes. I’m a plate short,” Cassidy said, placing a hand to her cheek. “I know I counted right. Wait just a minute.” She strolled to the wagon and grabbed the last plate. Glancing cautiously about to make sure no one watched, she gingerly pulled the little packet from her pocket. Sprinkling some of the red powder on the plate, she carefully walked back to the picnic spot. No one paid any attention to her as she cut the last piece of cake and placed it on Luke’s plate. They were too engrossed in Dell’s story of the Indian chief he’d seen in Abilene.
Luke took the plate from Cassidy’s hands. “Hope this is edible.” He threw Tarah a sideways glance, obviously trying to get a rise out of her.
Sticking out her tongue in retaliation, Tarah turned back to her pa’s story.
Biting the inside of her cheeks to keep from laughing out loud, Cassidy waited while Luke wolfed down two large bites of the cake without stopping to taste it. Suddenly his eyes grew wide, and he grabbed the nearest glass of lemonade.
“Ah—wa–wa–!” he cried, waving his hand over his mouth.
“Cut it out, Luke. We’re trying to listen to Pa,” Sam said, giving his brother a deep frown.
“Water—gimme water.”
“Get your own.”
“Luke St. John, you stop your foolishness this minute,” Ellen grumped.
“Hot! Hot!” Luke jumped up and ran for the creek.
Ellen shook her head while the rest of the family watched him in irritated silence.
“What that boy won’t do for attention,” Dell muttered. “I’d better go have a talk with him.”
Grabbing a corn muffin, Cassidy stood and glanced around the little group. “I’ll see to him. Continue your story, Dell.”
When she reached the boy, he was slapping handfuls of water on his tongue. He looked up with eyes smoldering in accusation. “You tried to poison me!”
“Don’t be ridiculous,” Cassidy replied calmly, dropping to the ground beside him. “Here, eat this. Water will only make it burn worse.”
Grudgingly he grabbed the muffin and devoured it, relaxing slowly as it took away the burn in his mouth.
“What’d you put in my cake?”
“That’s my secret.”
“Why’d you do that to me?” His eyes sparked with anger.
“It’s no fun to be on the receiving end of a prank, is it?” she asked quietly.
“I’ll say.”
“Now I think you and I are even.” She eyed him sternly. “But there’s the little matter of Miss Nelson.”
Caught, the boy swallowed hard and stared into the water.
“She tells me you’re still creating problems in class. That true?”
“Well…I guess so.”
“Hmm. Suppose we make a deal.”
Luke eyed her suspiciously. “Like what?”
“I don’t want to find any more snakes, frogs, or bugs in my bed. No more rocks in my bathwater. And I don’t want to hear of you causing any problems in class. Is that understood?”
Red-faced, he nodded grudgingly.
“And for my part, I’ll make sure your food is edible.”
“Mas aren’t supposed to put hot stuff in their kids’ food anyway,” he informed her.
“Well, I’ve never been a ma before, and I’m sorry if I don’t do it very well. But the threat of a thrashing didn’t seem to keep you out of trouble, so I came up with my own solution. Now do we have a deal?” She held out a hand.
Cautiously he shook her hand and, to Cassidy’s surprise, gave her a wide grin. “Aw, I guess you’re all right.” He stood. “I’d sure like to know what you put on my cake so I can do it to Sam sometime.”
“Luke!” Cassidy declared firmly, fighting to keep from grinning back at him. “A deal is a deal. No more pranks!”
He looked at her in disbelief. “Not even on Sam and the rest of the kids?”
“Well, just don’t hurt anyone, destroy any property, or do it at school.”
“Yes, ma’am,” he said and ran back to the little party around the picnic blanket.
A chuckle escaped her lips. Well, a tiger couldn’t change his stripes, but he could be tamed, so they said. Fun and games were part of what made Luke who he was, and as long as he didn’t get out of hand, she could grant him a little freedom.
What a day this was turning out to be! Cassidy sighed with contentment and stretched out her legs in front of her. She leaned back on her arms, watching the sun shining down on the rippling creek. Suddenly she felt a flutter inside. She placed a hand on her stomach and felt the flutter again. Her baby was moving! Tears formed in her eyes and streamed down her cheeks.
“Everything all right?” Dell dropped down beside her.
“Yes,” Cassidy replied, quickly wiping her tears away with the back of her hand.
“Then why are you crying?” he insisted softly.
“I’m just happy. I have a home and children, and this has been such a wonderful day. I guess I just became overwhelmed with God’s goodness.” She smiled at him, then threw a glance back to where Ellen was clearing away the food. “I’d better go help.”
Dell placed a restraining hand on her arm as she started to get up.
“Mother gave me strict instructions that you are not to move from this spot until she and Tarah finish cleaning up.”
Cassidy shrugged. It felt so good to relax that she wasn’t going to argue the point.
A loud splash caught their attention. Glancing toward the laughing children, Cassidy watched the playful antics of Jack and Emily in the water. Warrior jumped in behind them, barking wildly.
Dell stretched out on the grassy bank, using his arm behind his head for a pillow.
Another flutter from the baby sent a tremor of happiness through Cassidy, and she longed to tell her husband of the child’s existence. Swallowing hard, she glanced down at him. “Dell?”
“Hmm?” He opened one eye and stared up at her.
Suddenly Emily screamed. “Jack, come back!”
Cassidy shot to her feet and ran into the water. Jack was caught in a current pushing him downstream.
A scream tore at her throat, and without thought, she dove into the water and swam for all she was worth. “Hang on, Jack. Hang on.”
“Ma! Help me!”
The current was rough, and she felt it dragging at her long dress. She kicked hard against the weight. Finally she reached the little boy, but Dell was already there. He grabbed Jack around the waist just as the little boy was pulled under. Jack flailed his arms wildly.
“I have you,” Dell reassured. “Be still and don’t struggle.”
Gulping in a large mouthful of water, Cassidy coughed frantically. Seeing that Jack was safely in his father’s arms, she swam as hard as she could toward the nearest bank. Dragging her aching body from the river, she collapsed onto the grass. Dell was right behind her, carrying Jack. Cassidy sat up and held out her arms for the child. Pulling her son onto her lap, she wrapped her arms about him as tightly as she could without hurting him.
“Are you all right, sweet boy?” she asked, tears streaming down her face.
“Yeah, Ma.” Jack was already recovered from the ordeal and began to wiggle in her arms.
Cassidy kissed him hard, then let him go. He ran back to meet up with the other children, who hurried along the bank toward him. The way he recounted his ordeal with such enthusiasm, one would have thought it was a grand adventure.
Exhausted, Cassidy lay back on the ground. Closing her eyes, she sent up a prayer of thanks.
Suddenly a shadow fell across her. She opened her eyes to find Dell standing over her, his gaze resting on her stomach. Glancing down, she saw the white cotton dress molded to her body, revealing the small mound where their child grew inside her. The look of horror on his face said it all, and she placed a protective hand across the growing infant.
His gaze traveled from her stomach, up her body, to her eyes. “Are you all right?” he asked.
With a fatigued wave of her hand, Cassidy nodded.
“Are you pregnant?” His tone was guarded and clipped.
“Yes.” She met his gaze defiantly. After all, there was no shame in carrying her husband’s baby, even if he didn’t want her or the child.
“Is this why Mother insisted you get more rest—she knows?”
A short laugh left her lips. “Ellen’s the one who told me.”
“Why did you keep it from me?”
Cassidy thought she detected hurt in his voice, but when she looked into his eyes, they glittered hard. Disappointment clouded her heart. “Why indeed?” she replied bitterly. “You’ve been so sweet and tender lately, I don’t know why I didn’t tell you immediately.”
His eyes narrowed at her sarcasm, but Cassidy was undaunted by the warning flash and continued. “Maybe I just wanted to enjoy my happiness for a while before you spoiled it for me!”
She sat up, and a wave of nausea overtook her. Turning her head, she lost her lunch on the bank of the creek. Silently Dell took her into his arms while tears of humiliation fell from her eyes.
“Shh,” he crooned. “Don’t cry, my darling; the sickness doesn’t last very long.”
Suddenly Cassidy exploded in frustration. “You ignoramus,” she said, jerking back from his arms. “Do you really think I’m crying because I’m sick?”
Dell blinked in surprise and sat dumbfounded as she vented.
“I am thirty-five years old and have never borne a child. I welcome the sickness. I glory in it! I thank God every day knowing there is a life within me.”
“Calm down,” Dell said softly, gathering her back in his arms.
More frustrated than ever, Cassidy pushed him away from her. “You are a stubborn, stupid man, and I don’t know why I fell in love with you.” Rising to her feet, she clamped her hands down hard on her hips. “We had two wonderful days and nights together and could have had a lifetime of happiness, but you decided to push me away. Well, be mad all you want about this baby. I’m happy. Ecstatic, in fact, and I will be for the rest of my life. So there!”
Cassidy stomped back to the picnic area before he could say a word. Trembling, she leaned against the wagon and cried. Minutes later, when the tears were spent, she gave a determined lift to her chin, a decision made. She would not cry again. There were too many blessings to count for her to moon about and pine for a man who clearly only wanted her as a mother for his children—his older children, that is. It was time for her to settle in and enjoy motherhood. God was so good. And she would enjoy this pregnancy if it was the last thing she ever did! Dell or no Dell.
Dell lay tormented on his bed that night. He wanted to go to Cassidy, to hold her and reassure her of his love, but something held him back. Once again he bargained with God.
“You took Anna from me when I broke my promise. But I’ll keep my end of the bargain this time, God. Let Cassidy live, and I won’t touch her again while she’s still young enough to have children.”
In his mind, the years loomed ahead of him, and unbidden came the words Reverend Marcus had spoken the night Dell had attended the service on the trail. “God doesn’t bargain with man. His ways are too high for that.”
Dell squirmed on the tick mattress. Well, the preacher was wrong. God did bargain with man. He bargained, and man paid dearly if he didn’t keep his end of the deal. Dell had loved Anna, but his own lack of control had killed her. That would not happen with Cassidy. She was like a fresh spring breeze blowing through this dry, dusty land, and he refused to lose her.
When she jumped in the water after Jack, he had thought his heart would pound from his chest as fear rose up inside of him. A knot formed in his stomach at the thought of what might have happened to Jack and Cassidy. And to find out she was going to have a baby nearly did him in!
He’d watched Cassidy carefully the rest of the afternoon and insisted she go to bed as soon as she got home. She’d balked at the pampering but gave in when Ellen agreed with Dell.
“Oh, fine. I’ll go lie down, but it really isn’t necessary.”
When he’d looked in on her fifteen minutes later, she’d been sound asleep, a peaceful smile resting on her lips.
Dell emitted a low chuckle at the memory. How he loved that woman. But God was testing him, and her life was the prize, just like with Anna. The difference was that this time, he wouldn’t fail.
Storm clouds invaded the skies the following morning as Cassidy loaded the breakfast table with fluffy hotcakes and sizzling bacon. She looked on with loving amusement while the children and Dell devoured the sumptuous fare as though they hadn’t eaten in a month. A rumble of thunder sounded in the distance, and Dell pushed back from his plate.
“Better get a move on before the storm comes,” he instructed the children. “I’ll take you to school this morning.” He reached forward and tousled Jack’s unruly curls. “Want to ride along, son?” The little boy’s head bobbed as he shoved in one last bite of breakfast. Dell headed outside to hook up the team while the older children grabbed their books.
Cassidy stood at the open door with lunches in hand, ready to pass them out as the children bounded toward the wagon. Jack and Emily each kissed Cassidy before running outside with shouts of “Bye, Ma!” Luke grabbed his lunch and started to head out the door.
“Wait, Luke. Remember our deal.”
Throwing her a wide grin, he nodded and ran for the wagon.
Sam grabbed his lunch and paused, then reached over and gave her a peck on the cheek. “Bye, Ma,” he said softly. Speechless, she watched him go. With her heart still full of wonder, she faced Tarah’s glittering eyes.
“Don’t expect me to call you ‘Ma.’”
Deflated, Cassidy turned back to the table and sat to finish her coffee. “I don’t expect any of you to, but I’m happy the boys are beginning to accept me.”
“Tarah, let’s go,” Dell shouted from the wagon.
“You said I wouldn’t have to go after the first week.” Tarah’s eyes sparked with challenge.
With a sigh, Cassidy went back to the door. “Go on without her. Tarah’s staying home today.”
“She okay?”
“She’s fine. Just go before the rain starts.”
With a wave, Dell flicked the reins, and the wagon lurched forward.
Cassidy stepped back to the table and began filling a breakfast plate for Ellen, who was in her bed after the excitement of the day before. “If you’re staying home, you can help me.”
Tarah opened her mouth to protest, but Cassidy raised a hand. “No arguments. Take this plate to your granny. She’s feeling poorly.”
“Fine.”
“And then come back and help me clean up.” Cassidy ignored the anger flashing in the violet eyes and busied herself washing the dishes.
Tarah flounced away. When she returned a few moments later, she grabbed a towel to dry the dishes.
“You had no right to drag me away from Johnny like that,” Tarah began. “We were doing nothing wrong.”
“You don’t consider lying to get out of church, then kissing a man twice your age to be wrong?”
“Well…the lying part was wrong, but there was no other way to see him alone.”
“You shouldn’t be seeing him at all. Let alone kissing him.”
Cassidy searched frantically to find the words that would reach the girl.
“Johnny and I love each other,” Tarah insisted. “We are going to be married.”
A knot formed in Cassidy’s stomach. “Tarah, you haven’t…”
The girl blushed to the roots of her hair, and her eyes grew wide. “Of course not,” she gasped. “What kind of a woman do you think I am?”
Relieved, Cassidy gave her a wry smile. “To be honest, I don’t think of you as a woman. You’re still so young.”
Tarah lifted her chin.
“But,” Cassidy continued, “I can see that you are close to womanhood, and I wouldn’t want you to get hooked up with the wrong man.”
“Johnny is not the wrong man!”
“I thought there was another boy you were interested in—Anthony something or other.”
Tarah tossed her head. “Anthony Greene. I wouldn’t give that child the time of day. Besides, he’s smitten with Louisa Thomas.”
“I see…”
“Are you going to tell Pa about Johnny?”
“I don’t know, Tarah. I think he should know.”
“But he’ll fire Johnny if he finds out.”
If Johnny’s lucky, he’ll get off with just being fired, Cassidy thought. Looking at Tarah, she said, “I can’t worry about that. Unless…”
Hope rose in Tarah’s ashen face but left quickly at Cassidy’s words.
“Unless you promise me you won’t have anything more to do with the likes of Johnny Cooper.”
“You can’t ask me to do that. I love him!”
“Then you leave me no choice but to speak to your father.”
A sob escaped Tarah’s throat, and she threw the towel on the counter. “All right. I won’t see him anymore. I can’t have him lose his job because of me.”
She ran out the door, tears streaming down her lovely face.
Cassidy picked up the towel and finished wiping the dishes, praying for Tarah as she did so. “Mend her heart, Father. Young love is the cruelest love of all.”