Yeah, ’cause he grabbed the keys and was going out the door. There wasn’t any weather-stripping on it and ’cause I slammed it so fast it caught his hand and clipped the top of his finger off. I felt pretty shitty about it, I really did, but when he came back he more than made up for it – he tossed me through the door. They were picking wood outa my back for a week. And that’s not the first time something like that’s happened neither. I should be on total disability, too, you know, not just Aid For Dependent Children. There’s no way I can do any kind of work now, let alone be looking for work.
JOANN
Johnny, you tell me, no, you haven’t seen her, and I know you have and then you expect me to behave as if what you say is true. After what you said last night I guess you don’t really care for me anymore but why are you going back to her? I guess that’s where you’ve been, isn’t it, and not at your grandma’s like you said. Maybe this is the way it has to be, but the only reason I went to see Eddie was to see where you were and he said he didn’t know. You say you love me and me alone but look at the way you’re acting. Hey, believe me. And I do love you and just you alone. I was only over to Cheryl’s after I left Eddie’s because I couldn’t be with you when I wanted to. You told me to stop bugging you and I did. Then you get all mad at me. Well, love is not being mad at someone all the time, no matter what you say. Love is being with someone and loving them because they love you and you alone. Don’t tell this to anyone because this is our personal business. Loving you always, your Panda
JOHNNY
‘Okay,’ I said, ‘I’m miserable, you’re miserable, maybe we should be separated like this. Maybe we should be divorced. You’re young enough, there’ll always be someone out there that’ll wanna fuck you, even when Carson gets sick of you, ’cause there’s a whole lotta pussy out there just waitin’ for me, okay? ’Now that’s exactly what I told her. ‘Hold me,’ she said. So I did. I gave her a wonderful hug.
CARSON
Now it’s later, see. I’m on my back there, ’n I’ve woke up with this giant boner, ’n of course they’re both asleep, right? So first it’s Ter, I look at her, but she’s on her side snoring, so’s I turn to Jac, an’ her eyes open, she’s awake, man, an’ puts her fingers to her lips, shushing me, then licks her fingers, ’n, hey, you can guess the rest, but also says, ‘John’s been asking about us,’ so I say, ‘What’s to ask? How many times we been down now? Three? Four? Gimme a break, okay? I don’t wanna hear nothing more about the guy.’
CARSON
We’re down now, an’ I say, ‘You know, what about a bambino here?’ Pulling myself out, see, but Jac grabs me. ‘Ah, com’ere,’ she says, ‘don’t worry about it – it’ll take care of itself.’
JOHNNY
Now that’s where I’ve seen a lot of guys go wrong. ‘Not me,’ they’ll say, ‘I don’t need no old lady running my scene.’ Now assholes like that, they‘ve lost their purpose inside, ’cause what good is it sittin’ around doing blow ’n talkin’ nonstop about yourself ’n all your bullshit? For what? So in two days the whole ounce ’ll be gone, and you’ll be riding out one ass-kicker of a headache. An’ when you think about it, do you know one fuckhead that’s gone all the way to the edge, teetered there, and come back? Can you name one? So I see I’m getting wiser, that I’ve learned something, ’cause where’s the fun anymore, know what I mean?
JOHNNY
I said, ‘I’ll buy you a condo.’ Jac says, ‘You’ll buy me a condo? You don’t know anything about the Southern California real estate market of today. How much money do you have anyway?’ ’N I said, ‘How much does a guy need?’
JOHNNY
I thought I might as well have some fun outa this. So I got a pound of hamburger. I drove over to Arnie’s and got some Telazol he’d scored. I had one of them huge canvas mailbags Earle’d left in the wagon, plus some rope. I tossed the burger over the fence and smoked a joint. When I went in the yard Bucky was already staggering around. He’s a monster huge Dobie, see, so I’d really packed the Telazol in. I smoked another J, ’n then went ’n petted him. Then I got him up off his side, bagged him, then roped the bag shut and took it up the steps and laid him in the doorway. I cut some holes in the bag so’s he could breathe. I went back out in the alley, ’n had just about finished stuffing the rag down Car’s gas tank just before I was gonna torch it, when Bucky started barking and Car’s asshole buddy Larry started coming outside yelling. I hadn’t put enough dust in the damn burger, see! What a fuckin’ dog! Looks like a tanker truck, man, I swear! So’s I walked down the alley, lighting another Lucky, listening to all the commotion, ’n thought, Hell, to actually worry about anything is bad. It’s either get upset about about everything and get yourself crazy, or don’t get upset ’n let it pass, but most of all quit getting sucked into other people’s games...
CARSON
Now most dudes are broke, if they’re in the trades they are, ’cause they’re party animals first, right, I mean up your nose ’n down to your toes, you don’t need no ball ’n chain, an’ mos’ bitches think that’s how you think. But me, huh-uh, they just know better with me, so even if I get two bitches pregnant but can’t pick one, ’n just let ’em duke it out – or not – ’cause that’s not a bad way to handle it ’cause maybe they’ll both stick, like with two sisters? If they know you can handle it? Wouldn’t that be a blast? Like some a’ the Mormons do? I’ve got a cousin, lives over in Utah. She knows people like that, that they dig it...