Chapter 41  

Grey

Let me get this straight. You’re on your way to becoming a homeowner, you’re shedding your irresponsible, jackass persona, and settling down with a girl, but you’ve forgone your dream in the process?” Adam takes a sip of his beer and shakes his head. “I have to say, I’m not sure it’s a good trade.”

We’re walking on the beach on the hotel property. Skyler’s been released from the small island hospital and transferred back here. She’s up in her room sleeping right now. The rest of the crew left this morning. Only Mia, Garrett, Adam, and Alison, who came in a few days ago, are still on the island.

I take a sip of my beer, which is warm, as warm as the tropical air that’s tugging at my t-shirt and rustling through the palm trees, paving the way for a storm that’ll hit sometime tonight. “Yes to the homeowner and girl comments. As far as giving up my jackass persona, sorry to disappoint. And forgoing my dream? Postponing, more like.”

I knew what I was doing by coming here. Rez has sent Vogelson a few messages letting him know the situation, but the guy won’t even reply. Not surprising. We probably look irresponsible and like a terrible investment if we can’t even show up for the audition.

I’ve talked to each of the guys in the band. They’ve all been cool on the phone, but I know they’re probably hugely disappointed. In a way, it’s like we’re back to square one. But it doesn’t quite feel like square one. We’ve come together as a band over the past weeks. We’ve gained something. It has nothing to do with the showcase.

Earlier on the phone, Shane told me we’re an organism, with a heart and a mind and lungs and limbs. We need each other. We fail and succeed as one. I’d asked him, jokingly, if I was the organism’s asshole. Shane laughed and said, “Heart, dude. Heart, all the way.”

“Postponing,” Adam says. “Did Vogelson get back to Reznick?”

I smile. It still feels good to have my brother be “in” on my life again. “No. We haven’t heard anything.” I shrug. “I just meant we’ll figure out something else.”

Adam’s gaze moves across the water. I notice the tension in his jaw, the way he’s pursing his lips.

“Don’t tell me you feel responsible,” I say.

“Of course I do. I should’ve seen that we were asking too much of Skyler. You’ve been working toward the showcase your entire life.”

I laugh. “Wow. Drama. I think you’ve been hanging out with too many actors.”

Adam gives me a sidelong glance. I’m not telling him what he wants to hear. And I know he’s going to drive at me until I do.

“Okay. I’ll say it. It sucks, all right? I wanted that showcase. I thought it was going to be our break. But . . . ​I’m okay. I mean, I will be. We’ll find something else. Vogelson’s not the only producer out there. We’ll figure it out. And I had to be here for Sky. That was nonnegotiable.”

It’s hard to look him in the eye when I say that. It’s so new, this Skyler thing. It just feels like it’s all over my face, this blaring, over-the-top awesome feeling. “Besides,” I say, “if Vogelson backs out, then he’s an idiot because we are fucking great.”

Adam laughs. “And that, little bro, is exactly why I know it’s going to work out. There’s some serious confidence buzzing around you. It’s cool.”

“Thanks. Can we stop now? I can’t handle any more feelings.”

He laughs again. “Okay.” The skyline is black with clouds, except for the occasional flash of lightning. I’ve gotten used to Southern California. Weather—real weather—seems so flashy and dramatic. “Actually, there’s one more thing before we shut the feelings down. I’m going to ask Ali to marry me tonight.”

He reaches into his pocket and takes out a small velvet box, showing it to me.

“I had this whole thing planned. A private boat. Scuba. Dinner. I wanted to be out on the water with her when I asked, but . . .” He lifts his shoulders. “Storm. Anyway, I can’t wait any longer. I’m just going to drop to a knee and beg. Tell her anything she wants to hear, and hope she agrees to make me an honest man.”

This is the second-best thing I’ve heard in a long time. Second only to what Skyler said earlier. There were a lot of years I wondered if he’d ever marry again, after losing Chloe. But I knew it would lead to this with Ali. I think I knew right from the beginning. He was different with her from the start.

“So, assuming she says yes, will you be my best man?” he says.

“You’re not going to drop down on a knee and beg me?” I pull him into a hug. But there’s so much going on inside me, I have to rough him up a little and push him around, mess up his hair and try to trip him. He’s quick and manages to slip away.

As we make our way along the lighted path to the hotel, it’s like we’re in a horse race, the two of us almost breaking into a jog. I can’t stop smiling.

“What?” Adam says.

“I was just thinking . . . ​between Skyler and being your best man, I’m winning over Brooks. Hugely winning. I think I knocked him out of the game.”

“Jackass.”

“As advertised, bro. Always.”

I slip into Skyler’s hotel room quietly, stepping into the suite’s small sitting room. Mia is curled up like a cat on a chair, reading.

“How’s it going in here?” I was only outside with Adam for an hour, but I feel like I missed out. Like I was gone too long.

“Still asleep,” Mia says. She closes her book and stands. “It’s almost eight. I was going to order some food. Garrett said he wants to join, too.”

“Mia, why don’t you and Garrett go grab a bite at the restaurant? You haven’t left her side in days. And, no offense, but it’s probably about time for you to rest up, shower, call Ethan . . . ​whatever it is Mia Galliano does with her spare time.”

She smiles. “Mia Galliano could definitely use a little break. And I know you’ll take good care of our girl.” She grabs her purse off the couch and casts a quick look toward the bedroom. “Sky’s got water and Gatorade in there, but when she wakes up, she’ll probably want some tea. Then probably something light to eat.”

“I’m on it. Look, text me if you’re worried. But don’t be worried. I’ve got it.”

“Okay. Thanks, Grey. You know, you’re really good for her.”

“So are you.”

We do a fist-bump and laugh. Team Skyler.

After she leaves, I let myself into the bedroom. I’m surprised to find the bed empty. The bathroom door is slightly ajar, and a shaft of light pours into the darkened bedroom. The shower turns on.

I step toward the door. “Skyler?” I knock, lightly. “You all right?”

“Grey?”

“Yeah. Just . . . ​just checking on you. Everything okay?”

“No.”

My heart stops.

“I mean, it would be, if you were in here with me.”

That blows my mind for a few seconds. Maybe it’s minutes. Or maybe time stops. Who knows?

I get it together and push the door open and there she is, a little hunched, because she’s still weak, standing under the spray of water, smiling. I’ve seen her naked before, but never in water, never standing, never waiting for me. Never like this. She’s beautiful. Crushingly, painfully beautiful.

Knowing what’s been going on, what she’s been through, I notice she’s thinned out. She’s less curvy. But she’s no less gorgeous than she was. I don’t think I could ever look at her and not find her beautiful. What I don’t like is the fragile slant of her shoulders. The wavering strength I see in her eyes.

I realize I’m standing here. But I don’t want to move. All I want to do is stare at her. Except that’s definitely, definitely not all I want to do.

I tug my shirt off. “Sky, are you sure?”

We’ve messed around before. We’ve texted a thousand times every day. I’ve written a song for her. Two, technically. I’m pretty sure she’s my best friend and that I’m gone for her. But it still feels like this . . . ​where we’re going . . . ​what’s about to happen . . . ​it still feels like something that’s too good to be true.

She nods. “I think I’ve been sure for a long time. Maybe since our first audition, when you told me I’m good at fake kissing.”

I step out of the rest of my clothes. “Why the hell did you wait so long to tell me?”

“I don’t know. Maybe I wanted you captive when I did it?”

I step into the shower and wrap my arms around her. Try not to pass out at how good she feels against me. Insanely good. Or to laugh at how obvious it is that I am ready to go. “You’ve got me, Skyler, beautiful Skyler. Now what? Should we talk music?”

“I think we can save the talking for later.” She rolls up on her toes, wrapping her arms around my neck. “You are very tall.”

I lean closer. “You’re short.”

She blinks, slow and sultry, her gaze warm, like she can see into my soul. “Your eyes, Grey.”

“Your everything, Sky.”

Then I bend a little lower and kiss her.