Shelly is still in the emergency waiting room when we arrive. Brian is sitting next to her, his hand wrapped around hers for support. He barely even looks at me when we rush in. Shelly glares.
“You said twenty minutes. It’s been thirty. Do you know how long ten extra minutes can be when a woman is cramping?” She lets out a gasp and Brian’s face goes pale as she squeezes the blood from his hand. I wait for the pain to subside.
“I’m sorry, Shelly. We were skating at Rockefeller when you called. David had to make arrangements for his kids.” And it’s not like I’ve never had cramps. But I know that’s not what she’s talking about.
Her eyes tear up. “I’m sorry I snapped. But they aren’t calling me, and I’m afraid I’m going to lose the baby before the doctor sees me. Will you talk to someone?”
“We’ll do our best, Shelly.” David pulls me toward the receptionist, and I wish with all my heart I had Dancy’s guts. Remembering how she bullied the nurse for me, I buck up and pretend I’m my friend.
“Excuse me, ma’am,” David says. The receptionist totally ignores him.
I lean over the counter and wave my hand in her face. “Excuse me!”
Oh, no, she did not just raise a manicured nail at me.
“Excuse me,” I insist.
“I will be with you in a minute,” she says with a haughty tone that gets under my skin.
“No. You’ll be with me now.” I slap the counter. “My little sister isn’t going to lose her baby while you finger through a bunch of stupid charts. There is a room full of witnesses who will be called on to testify in a lawsuit if you don’t get off your behind and get my sister back to an examining table immediately.”
The waiting room begins to rumble with support. “You tell her, baby.” “Get that little girl to a doctor.” The receptionist’s face takes on a look of annoyed anxiety.
“All right. I’ll see if we can get her in.”
“Thank you,” I say sweetly.
I walk back to my sister and take the seat on her other side since Brian’s not budging from his position.
“Try to stay calm, Shell,” I say even though I know darned well it’s a dumb suggestion.
A few minutes later, the nurse comes out to the waiting area. “Dr. Wyman called. He wants to admit you for some tests. Someone will be down from labor and delivery soon to take you upstairs.”
“Do you need me to sign anything?” Shelly asks, her voice teary. My heart aches for her. I can see that she’s sick with worry. Her hand keeps covering her tummy as though willing her child to live.
The nurse shakes her head. “You’re preregistered. We have all your information. But we’ll need to see your insurance card.”
“I—” Shelly looks down, and I feel her shame.
“Just bill her as a self pay. You have the address.”
The nurse looks at Shelly as if to confirm. My sister nods.
“All right then.”
I turn to David. “Listen, there’s no reason for you to hang around. I can take a cab later, after I’m sure she’s okay. Or have Laini or Dancy come get me. You’ve gone above and beyond the call of duty, and I appreciate it a lot.”
“Can’t Brian drive you?” he asks.
“Hmm?” The mention of Brian seems out of place. Like a weird dream. Not scary. Just not right, you know?
“Your boyfriend, Brian.” David peers down at me as though trying to probe my soul. “The one taking such great care of your sister.” Is it my imagination or is he a little offended for me? Would this be the appropriate time for me to tell him Brian is not my boyfriend, but rather a semi-stalking pain in the butt that my mom wants for a son-in-law? But the words won’t form.
Instead, I give a wave. “Oh yeah. I’m sure Brian can take me home.” I’m not going to mention that he must have brought my sister to the hospital in a cab or that the most he can do is share a cab ride with me—and probably make me pay for it anyway.
David’s brow puckers, and I’m almost positive he doesn’t believe me. But ever the gentleman, he nods. “All right. I guess I’ll call Rachel and go take the twins off her hands.”
“Good idea.” Don’t leave Hansel and Gretel in the wicked witch’s clutches long enough for her to fatten them up and eat them for supper.
He turns to Shelly, who is still sitting with her feet propped up on a chair, waiting for someone to come and take her to labor and delivery. What is taking them so long, anyway? I stuff my irritation as David reaches out to her. “I’ll be praying for you and your baby.”
Relief slides across Shelly’s face. She grabs his hand. “Thank you, David. Thank you so much. Please ask God to keep my baby safe.”
“I will, honey.” Is he sweet or what? I just want to grab him around the waist and press my cheek against his broad chest and not let go.
In the next minute a nurse’s aide shows up pushing a wheelchair. “Shelly Brockman?”
Shelly drops Brian’s hand and stands carefully. I see her grimace and my heart twists.
“Can I stay with her?” Brian asks.
“Are you the father?”
His face goes red. “No, ma’am.”
“It’s okay,” Shelly says. “I’d like him to stay with me.”
The nurse’s aide gives a shrug. “I guess it’s fine.”
Brian turns his gaze to me. “D-do you mind?” The poor guy has such guilt in his eyes I feel a little sorry for him.
“Go. Be with her, Brian.”
“I-I never meant for it to happen with us. She just… we have a lot in common and I… at the hospital when your dad was sick and then New Year’s Eve. She…” He clears his throat.
“Brian. Really, it’s okay. I’m glad you two are hitting it off.”
David leans close. “Call me and let me take you home.” I meet his eyes and my breath stops. The caring in his expression makes me feel—I don’t know exactly because it’s a new feeling—but I’d love to experience it every day of my life from a man who loves me. A man besides Dad, that is.
“Okay.”
“Promise?”
“Yeah. I gotta go or I’ll lose track of my sister.” I give him a rueful smile. “And Brian.”
He smiles back and hands me a business card. “You don’t have my number.”
Does everyone have business cards but me? I feel a blush. He knows I have no intention of playing damsel in distress. I’ve been taking care of myself for too long. Who needs to be treated with kid gloves?
“Thanks.”
I hurry down the hallway just before the elevator doors close. “Hang on!” The nurse’s aide scowls but pushes the open button so I can slip in. David watches until the doors close. The last thing I see is his thumb and pinky pressed like a phone receiver against his ear and mouth.
“Call me,” he mouths.
Maybe having a man hover is nice every now and then. I glance at Brian, who is definitely hovering over my sister. As long as it’s the right hoverer, I suppose it’s okay.
Do you think God is punishing me?”
Shelly’s question takes me aback, and I walk across the room and squeeze her hand. “Why do you say that?”
“You know, I was so angry that I got pregnant and that Drew ran off with his other girlfriend. At first, I really wanted an abortion. I mean, I honestly had no intention of carrying this baby. Even at my first doctor’s appointment I was going to ask for the name of someone who would perform an abortion and use the money you gave me for prenatal care to pay for it.”
“Shelly!”
“I know. It would have been terrible of me, but I was feeling so desperate and I—I hated this baby, Tabby. I felt like it was totally ruining my life.”
Oh, sure—blame the baby. I can’t find much sympathy. Because if anyone ruined her life, she did it to herself. “What made you decide not to run off and get the abortion?” Am I naïve or what? It never even occurred to me that she might take the money I gave her and use it for an abortion.
“The doctor put the little machine on my stomach, and I heard the baby’s heart beating. At first I thought it was mine. But Dr. Wyman said, ‘Your baby’s got a strong heartbeat.’ When I realized that was my baby, I just didn’t see it as an inconvenience anymore. I remembered that verse in the Bible about God knowing a baby before it’s even formed inside the mother. And it was like God was telling me that He would take care of everything. That He loved this baby enough for both of us.”
I don’t usually feel jealous of my sister. I’m the one who always has the most going for her. The most friends, the most money, the most respect—the only thing she has more of than me is dates. And well, look what it got her. Which sort of brings me back to the point. Why does she get to be a mom before me? But then, what kind of mother would I be anyway? I pat my sister’s hand. “That’s wonderful, Shell. I’m so proud of you.”
She smiles a truly happy smile. “Every time I closed my eyes, I’d hear that heartbeat in my mind and something started changing in my heart toward my baby. I truly love it now. I want this baby. So, do you?”
“Do I what? Want your baby?”
“Of course not.” She rolls her eyes. “Do you think God is punishing me?”
“Why would He?”
“You know… because I wanted an abortion.”
“Shelly, listen to me. I don’t know why this is happening. And I don’t know the end result. Only God does. But I find it very hard to believe that God would give you this love for your baby only to punish you with a miscarriage. I personally believe He’s too gentle and loving for that.”
“So you don’t think I’ll lose it?” She’s looking at me with eyes as trusting as a toddler. Everything in me cries out to reassure her. I’m praying for the best.
“I don’t know. But if you do lose the baby, I don’t believe it will be a punishment from God. People lose babies every day for a million different reasons. Let’s just keep praying, okay?”
She nods, her expression troubled. I know I didn’t give her the answer she was hoping for. But who am I to try to predict the purposes of God? Guilt flashes through me. It’s been a while since I’ve been to church. Since the morning after my first appearance back on Legacy of Life. And the longer I’m away from church, the less I want to go. I’m tempted sometimes to join some of the cast in an after-filming beer, but so far I’ve resisted. I don’t want to be a stumbling block. But maybe being a Christian is more than not being a stumbling block. What if my purpose for returning to the show is more about being a light?
“Do you mind about Brian?” Shelly asks, drawing me from my reverie.
“What? You mean that he chose you?”
Her face flushes pink and she nods. “You didn’t really like him much in that way, did you? It was more about Mom than Brian.”
“Now, how come you’re the only one who got that?”
“You’ve never had the look of a woman in love around him.”
I give her a tender smile. “You do.”
“Yeah, I guess I do.”
“Brian seems pretty taken with you too.”
She nods again. “We’re trying not to move too fast, but you know, when it feels right…”
A nurse enters the room. “We’re taking you down for your ultrasound.”
Shelly grips my hand. “Stay with me, okay?”
Okay, Shelly, there’s the fetus.” Dr. Wyman is rubbing a gelled instrument across my sister’s slightly swollen belly. “Do you want to know the baby’s sex?”
Shelly looks at me for advice. I shrug, although I’m dying to know. “It’s up to you.”
She turns back to the doctor and nods.
“He appears fine and healthy to me. Can you see how strong that heartbeat is?”
He? Did he say he?
“Shell,” I say, staring at my tiny nephew on the screen. “You’re having a little boy.”
Tears pour down my cheeks. A new love wells in me for this child. This baby that is linked to me by blood. And suddenly I understand how Felicia could love her children with her soul, even if her mind has forgotten.
It’s nearly midnight by the time Shelly is settled back into her room. The doctor is pretty sure the cramps were simply first pregnancy stretching and pulling, but he’s keeping her overnight to be sure. A blood test confirmed high HCG levels, and the ultrasound showed a healthy baby boy. I call my folks and give them the happy news. Brian’s still hanging around and when the nurse lets him into Shelly’s room, she lights up like the Fourth of July. He sits beside her bed and takes her hand, and I realize I’m watching the budding of a new relationship. I’m definitely not needed here. They barely notice as I say good night. I head down the hallway toward the elevators. As I approach the waiting area, movement catches my eye.
David?
“Going somewhere?”
“What are you still doing here?”
“What do you think?”
My stomach flips at the way he’s looking at me. Intense and serious like I’m the only person in the world, despite the nurses moving up and down the hallway. I just wish… Oh, I don’t know what I wish.
“How are Shelly and the baby?” he asks.
“They’re both fine.”
He nods. “Thank God,” he says and meets my gaze head-on. “Is Brian driving you home?”
I shake my head. “He’s staying with Shelly for a while.”
His brow shoots upward. “And you’re okay with that?”
I nod. “Brian was more my mom’s dream guy for me than mine. I don’t think she’ll care which of her daughters ends up with him.”
“Then I’m glad I stuck around.”
“You left the twins with Rachel?” I hate the vision of him driving to Rachel’s home, the twins asleep, and Rachel finagling him into staying at her house longer than is decent. But I didn’t need to worry. David pushes the down button on the elevator. “They’re with Nessie. She got off work right after we got here.”
“Oh yeah. Nessie.” His sister.
He nods. “They’ll stay with her overnight.”
I remain silent as we ride down the elevator together. I’m trying not to read more into this moment than the situation warrants. “I appreciate your thoughtfulness, David. But you know I’m an independent woman. I can get myself home.”
The elevator jolts into place and the doors open. David presses his fingers to the small of my back and guides me into the lobby.
“Humor me. I like playing protector.”
“I’m not acting very grateful, am I?”
“Nope. And after I waited around all this time, inhaling disinfectant and diseases just to see you safely home.”
How cute is he? “I apologize, my knight. Thank you from the bottom of my heart for protecting me from the big bad cabbies who are just waiting to learn all of our secrets and report back to their superiors.”
“What are you talking about?” He says it with a laugh, but sort of a bewildered laughter, if you know what I mean.
“Oh, forget it. Just a conspiracy theory of my mom’s.”
David opens the door to his Camry and waits while I slide into the soft (and cold, I might add) leather seat.
I lean my head against the headrest once I’m securely fastened into my seat belt. I feel a migraine coming on and my eyes close almost instantly.
I must have dozed off during the drive because the next thing I know, David is touching my shoulder. My eyes pop open. “Hey, are we there?” I ask.
“Yeah.”
He exits the car and walks around to my side. On top of everything else, he’s a gentleman. Only. Wait a sec. David obviously made a mistake. He didn’t drive me to the studio to pick up Dancy’s car. Instead we’re parked alongside the curb in front of my apartment building.
I slide out of the car, frowning. “Uh, David. What about Dancy’s car?”
“You were sleeping. I figured I could pick you up on the way to the studio. The kids have scenes tomorrow.”
“But I have to be there at five in the morning. I know the twins don’t.”
“Let me worry about it. I’ll get you there on time. I promise.”
“Look. I can just take a cab. It’s no problem.”
He smiles at me and my stomach does a major cartwheel. “A promise is a promise, Tabby. Trust me. I’d feel terrible if you took a cab all that way.”
“I’d feel terrible if you drove so far out of the way that early in the morning. You’ve really gone above and beyond the call of duty tonight. I can’t thank you enough for driving me to the hospital.”
Oh, he’s giving me that look again. Like he wants to take me in his arms. And honestly? There’s nothing I’d like better. But how complicated would things be if David and I started dating all of a sudden? And remember how awful I am with kids? He’s got those twins who really don’t like me very well. It just wouldn’t work.
“Listen, David. I don’t think it’s a good idea for us to, you know…” I clear my throat because I’m not sure how to end the sentence.
“It’s a ride to work, Tabby. Not a proposal. Not an affair.” He steps closer and lowers his voice. “Not even a kiss.”
“Right, I know that.” My stomach is knotted into a ball of nerves. “I know it’s not a-a you know…”
“Kiss?”
I swallow hard. I have to stop looking at his lips like I want to be kissed. Which I do. But that’s beside the point. “Right. We’re not animals. We can resist temptation.”
His mouth curves into a wry smile, and I immediately know I’ve made a terrible mistake. “Sure. I’ll do my best to resist the temptation.”
Now I just feel stupid and full of myself. Obviously I’ve completely misunderstood David’s actions. I have two choices. Hold my head up and walk off, saving myself from further embarrassment. Or do what he deserves and apologize. “I guess that did sound a little presumptuous. You’ve been very kind to me. Thank you. I’ll definitely take a cab in the morning. I don’t want to impose upon your generosity any more than I already have.”
“Listen, Tabby—”
“No, you listen. It’s okay. You don’t have anything to explain. I’m the one who… well, never mind. Let’s just leave it, okay?”
I just want to run up the stairs and hide my head under the covers and never ever see David Gray again.
As if he is reading my thoughts, he gives me a sympathetic smile.
“Okay, we’ll leave it.” He places a hand to the small of my back and walks me to the door like he can’t wait to get rid of me. I don’t blame him. Poor guy. I’ve put him through a lot tonight. And as much as I’d like to linger on the step and delve into conversation, I decide to let him off the hook.
He opens the door for me and steps inside to the foyer, waiting while I unlock the inside door. I turn to him and shoot out my hand. “Well, good night. Thanks again.”
He presses his lips into a grin and wraps his wonderful, warm hands—both of them—around mine, and I swear it feels almost like a hug. “Good night, Tabby.”
I gulp past the sudden pinch in my throat. “Night,” I croak out, rushing inside the door and up the stairs to my apartment. I can’t help but turn and look back down the stairs. He’s still standing there. Waiting to make sure I get in safe. He lifts his hand when he sees me looking, and regret hits me full in the gut. How come he didn’t try to kiss me?