CHERYL SIPPED HER coffee and grimaced.
She rarely made coffee, but the apartment had a coffeemaker. She’d hoped the caffeine jolt would help her figure out what to do about the video.
She tapped her finger on the mug. If the Fitzgeralds or the Foresters saw that awful thing, she would die. Would anyone believe it wasn’t her? Her stomach burned. She tipped the mug into the sink. The coffee wouldn’t do her any good if it made her sick.
As much as she hated the thought, she needed to see the video again.
The last time her hair had been that long was after Brad died. They’d lived with Levi. She shuddered. He must have taken pictures of her sleeping and had them superimposed on the actress’s face in the video. Could he have done this from prison? Was he J Smith?
To clear her mind, she pulled out the makings for oatmeal pancakes. It was the only recipe her grandmother had passed down to her.
Life would have been better if she’d grown up with Grandma. From what she remembered, her grandmother had loved her, but she’d died when Cheryl was nine.
After pulling the ingredients together, she threw bacon into her cast-iron pan. It was Saturday. She would invite Nathan and Issy to join them.
Maybe she shouldn’t. If something happened and this video came out, she didn’t want to see the disgust on Nathan’s face. He’d been kind last night and she’d pushed him away.
Josh came into the kitchen, rubbing his eyes. “Mornin’.”
“Good morning to you.”
“I smell bacon.” He yawned.
“And oatmeal pancakes,” she said. “I thought we’d have our own Fourth of July celebration.”
“Okay.” He didn’t have any enthusiasm. There were pink dabs on his legs and ankles.
“Did something bite you?”
“I dunno.” He scratched his tummy. “Bess put stuff on me.”
She’d never seen him so tired. What had he gotten into? “Why don’t you brush your teeth, shower and get dressed?”
“Issy’s in my room.”
“You can dress in the bathroom.”
“’Kay.”
She started turning the bacon, but a soft knock at the back door interrupted her. Hurrying over, she flipped the lock and rushed back to the pan. “Come on in.”
Should she tell Nathan about the video? No. He had enough to worry about with his daughter. He didn’t need to take on her problems, too.
“Did everyone sleep all right?” Nathan wrapped his arms around her and brushed a kiss on her neck.
Since the shower was still running, she gave herself a minute to enjoy his hug. With his arms around her, she could forget about everything else. “The kids didn’t make a peep.”
“I was worried Issy would have another nightmare. She freaked out during the fireworks.”
“Oh, no.”
“I got her calmed down. But she jumped at every explosion.”
She turned to look at him. “How did you and Josh do?”
“He had fun with the family.” He exhaled. “I don’t know why he hates me. I’m trying. I just...” He raised his hands and let them drop to his thighs.
“I’d hoped things would get better.” She flipped the bacon.
“You and me both.”
“Josh is itchy. What did he get into?”
“We weren’t sure.” Nathan pulled out plates. “Both he and Issy were scratching and didn’t eat much. We thought maybe sand fleas.”
“Ouch.”
“I didn’t see any bites. We put on calamine.” He stroked her back. “I missed you yesterday.”
She set the tongs down and kissed him. And longed for more. But she still had to deal with Levi’s foulness and Josh’s dislike.
Nathan brushed back her hair and touched the circles under her eyes. “Didn’t get much sleep?”
She tried to joke it off. “Are you saying I look old and tired?”
“Just tired.” He smoothed his thumb between her eyebrows. “What’s wrong?”
“I tossed and turned last night.” She flipped the bacon, even though it didn’t need turning. “I shouldn’t have sampled the wedding cake. I can’t eat sweets that late.”
He headed to the coffeemaker. “Mind if I...?” He waved his hand.
“Go ahead.” At least it wouldn’t go to waste.
“You don’t usually make coffee.” He took a sip. “And this is good coffee.”
“I only like the smell.” She pulled out the griddle.
“You’ve got a lot of food here.” He leaned against the counter. “Need help eating it?”
“Are you inviting yourself to breakfast?” She kept her tone playful, but maybe she should put some distance between them. If Nathan saw the awful video, he might push her away.
“Am I invited?” Nathan asked.
“You and Issy are invited. It’s my famous oatmeal pancakes.”
“Need help with breakfast?” he offered.
“You could set the table and check on Issy.”
She flipped another strip and stared into the pan. “Can I borrow your computer again?”
“Sure. Didn’t finish your paper?”
“No.” She hated lying, but she had to watch the video again.
For Josh’s sake, she had to stop letting people take advantage of her. That meant figuring out what to do about Levi’s blackmail.
* * *
“HEY, SLEEPYHEAD.” NATHAN rubbed Issy’s shoulder. “It’s breakfast time. Pancakes.”
He hadn’t tried his hand at pancakes yet. Life would be simpler if poor Issy had two parents who lived together. Then each parent could focus on their strengths. Cooking definitely wasn’t his. He needed to find Heather—not that he wanted to co-parent with her, but he was still drawing a blank locating her.
He wouldn’t mind parenting with Cheryl.
Issy opened her eyes and shook her head. Nathan put a hand on her back. Was she warm? “Come on, let’s get you up.”
Thank goodness the bed was dry. He took her into the steamy bathroom. “On the pot, kiddo.”
Josh was at the table by the time they entered the kitchen. But the boy cradled his chin on his hand.
“I must have kept them up too late. They’re exhausted,” he whispered.
Cheryl set a plate of pancakes on the table. “They slept in, though.”
She brushed Josh’s hair back. “You’re a little warm.”
They both put bacon and pancakes on the kids’ plates, cut everything and added syrup. “Eat up.”
Nathan dug in. “These are great.”
The kids barely moved.
“Come on, Josh.” Cheryl picked up his fork and fed him. “These are your favorite.”
Nathan did the same with Issy. It was like the kids were zoned out. He rubbed his neck. “Maybe they had too much sun yesterday.”
Cheryl looked at Issy and then Josh. “No one’s sunburned.”
“And I made sure they drank plenty of water.”
Issy gave up after eating half a pancake. Josh didn’t each much more than that. He asked, “Can I watch TV?”
“Sure.” Cheryl chewed her nail. “Take Issy with you.”
Josh held out his hand. He and Issy made a sweet picture as they walked into the other room.
“Do you think they’re okay?” Cheryl asked.
“I have no idea.” He had so much to learn about kids.
“I don’t understand.” Cheryl picked up plates and scraped the remains into the garbage. “Josh always eats at least four pancakes.”
“Maybe they should take it easy this morning. Issy and I are going to my parents’ house this afternoon.” He stacked juice glasses in the dishwasher. “Mom wants a quiet picnic at the house. She invited you and Josh.”
“Maybe.”
“You needed to use my computer?” He pointed to the laptop on the counter.
Cheryl looked at the computer like it was evil. With a sigh, she flipped open the screen. “You should have a password.”
“Not me. You know...” He tapped the side of his head and circled his finger.
“What?” She frowned.
“My brain doesn’t work right.”
Her mouth dropped open. “That’s not true. You just learn differently.”
“Right.” He didn’t need a pep talk.
“Stop tearing yourself down.” She pointed a finger at him. “You’re talented. Other people can’t create what you do. Can’t love your little girl the way you do. Can’t draw the way you do.”
Now it was his mouth that dropped open. “No one has ever stood up for me.”
“Your family loves you.”
“Yeah.” But they hadn’t stood up for him. He’d been angry at the unfairness of his world and burned too many bridges. “I may not have earned the right to have my family defend me.”
“Well, they should. And if they didn’t, that’s on them. Not you.”
“You’re good to me.” He pulled her out of the chair and pressed his lips to hers. “For me.”
She stiffened, then relaxed and wrapped her arms around his neck.
“I think we should tell the kids,” he whispered, holding her close. “Tell Josh.”
“I know you do.” She took a deep breath. “I want to wait.”
“Mom?” Josh called. “Can I have a glass of water?”
“Sure.” She eased away and pulled two glasses out of the cupboard. “Maybe they both need water.”
“I’ll take it in.” He needed space. Otherwise he would press Cheryl for more than she was willing to give. She was the first woman he wanted to be with and she wouldn’t tell her son about them.
“I’ll finish this.” She waved her hand at the computer. “Then we can see how the kids are before deciding on the picnic.”
She stared at the laptop like it was a snake ready to strike.
Something was off. He released a breath. That was his world. Something was always half a bubble off plumb.
“How’s it going?” he asked the kids, handing them the glasses.
“I feel funny.” Josh rubbed his back against the sofa. “Issy does, too.”
Nathan leaned forward. “What did she say?”
“Not words.” Josh squirmed.
Nathan moved to Issy. “You’re not feeling well?”
She shook her head. That could mean anything. He checked her ankles. She had dried dots of pink from the calamine lotion. He checked Josh. Was his skin red?
“Did anything sting you when you went swimming?” he asked. Jellyfish?
Josh and Issy shook their heads. Nathan pushed back Issy’s hair. She might be a little warm.
The pancakes sat like rocks in his stomach. Had he screwed up yesterday? “Let me know if you feel worse.”
She nodded but focused on the television. Josh shrugged. Of course.
Nathan headed back to the kitchen, stopping in the doorway. Cheryl stared at the computer screen, her hand over her mouth. All the color had drained from her face and her freckles stood out like brown paint on her pale skin.
“What’s wrong?” he asked.
Her head jerked up. She looked back at the screen, clicking off whatever had horrified her. “Let me just send this last note.”
Her fingers flew over the keyboard. Then she clicked everything closed and shut the laptop. “Done.”
He poured the last of the coffee into his mug. Probing, he asked, “Was that school stuff?” Would she trust him with the truth?
“Yes.” She brushed the crumbs from the table and then grabbed a wipe and scrubbed. “I told you about my nutmeg paper.”
She was lying. The pancakes did another turn in his stomach. Why?
Whatever she’d been looking at had scared her badly. He had to find out what it was.
* * *
“THE KIDS AREN’T perking up.” Cheryl tossed the last paper plate in the garbage can next to the Foresters’ deck.
She, Nathan, Bess and Daniel were cleaning up from the picnic. Debbie and Samuel held hands as they swung on the glider.
Nathan shook his head. “I don’t know what’s wrong with them.”
She pointed at the tree house where the kids were coloring. “Are you sure that’s safe?”
“Pop built it. Daniel and I both checked the flooring before letting the kids climb up.” He threw an arm around her shoulder. “They’re safe.”
“I’m just—Josh is never this quiet,” she said. “Plus, they’re scratching even more.”
Bess came up behind Cheryl and Nathan and set a hand on both of their shoulders. “You’re watching those kids like hawks. What’s up?”
“They’re not acting normal.” Cheryl sighed.
“They had a big day yesterday.” Bess squeezed her shoulder. “Lots of running, swimming and sun.”
Both kids raked their fingers across their calves.
“I wonder.” Nathan headed over to the tree and up the ladder. “Guys, can you come down?”
He hoisted Issy into his arms and Josh followed them down the ladder.
“Oh, no.” They both had a rash on their legs. Cheryl pulled up Josh’s shirt. Red bumps covered his belly. “Does it itch?”
Josh nodded. “I can’t stand it.”
“Don’t scratch,” she said.
“That looks like chicken pox.” Debbie moved closer and touched both kids’ heads as they sat on the edge of the deck. “I’ll grab the calamine.”
The screen slammed shut as she headed into the house.
“Where would they have gotten chicken pox?” Daniel asked.
Nathan and Cheryl turned to each other. “Day care.”
Pop stopped next to the kids. “You’re looking multicolored there, you guys.”
Cheryl grabbed his arm. “Have you had chicken pox?”
“When I was little.”
Daniel shook his head. “You should check with your oncologist before getting too close to them, Pop.”
Cheryl set her hand on Josh’s forehead. “He’s been warm since this morning.”
“My head hurts,” Josh whined.
Issy pointed at her head. “Does your head hurt, too?” Cheryl asked. Issy nodded, her bottom lip quivering.
Debbie came back with a bottle and cotton balls. “Let’s cover what itches.”
She shook the bottle, loaded up a cotton ball and handed it to Cheryl.
“It feels like I should do more,” Cheryl said.
Nathan and she dabbed at all the red, blotchy skin.
“Let’s head home,” Nathan said, glancing at his dad.
“When Daniel and Nathan had chicken pox, I gave them oatmeal baths,” Debbie said.
“I’ve got oatmeal.” Cheryl wanted to get Josh home and comfortable.
They packed and buckled the kids into the truck. Nathan helped Cheryl into the front seat, suggesting, “If you don’t mind, maybe we could take care of them together.”
“I’d appreciate the help.” With Brad overseas, she’d raised Josh mostly alone. She’d dealt with teething, illnesses and just plain grumpiness. It would be nice to share the burden. “Issy can sleep in the bunk bed.”
“And me?” he whispered. “Where will I sleep?”
She was worried about her son and he was worried about where he’d sleep? “I can’t think about that right now.”
* * *
NATHAN GRABBED HIS phone when it rang. Finally. He’d been waiting for the on-call doctor from the clinic to call back.
“Mr. Forester, I understand you might be dealing with chicken pox cases.”
“That’s what we think, but we don’t understand,” Nathan said. “Both Josh and Issy have been vaccinated.”
“I looked up their immunization records. It’s possible Isabella was exposed before she got her first vaccination. Hopefully Josh’s vaccination means he’ll have a milder case.”
Great.
“Keeping them comfortable is about all you can do.” The doctor rattled off a list of instructions. “Keep them isolated until the pox crust over. That can take up to two weeks.”
She gave Nathan recommended antihistamine doses for Josh and Issy. He carefully wrote down the amounts and then read them back. He couldn’t screw this up. The kids and Cheryl were counting on him.
Nathan stuck his head into the bathroom where Cheryl was supervising Issy’s bath. “Dr. Sanders called back.”
He ran through the conversation and then said, “She recommended antihistamines and lotion.”
Cheryl poured water over Issy’s hair. “I planned to search online, too.”
“I’ll do it.” He should be able to handle that, right? If he had trouble, he’d bring the laptop to her to double-check.
He opened the computer. And remembered Cheryl’s worried face this morning. He wanted to find out why she’d looked so frightened, but that would have to wait. Issy and Josh came first.
It took him three tries to get the correct spelling of chicken pox. Damn his fingers and brain not working together. He finally found a website. “Calamine. Aloe vera. Lavender infusions. Tea tree oil. Oatmeal baths and witch hazel.”
When he went to tell Cheryl, she was drying Issy off. He quickly related what he’d found and let her know he’d be back soon.
After a trip to the drugstore and a conversation with the pharmacist, Nathan returned home with two full bags.
When he entered the apartment, the kids each sucked on a Popsicle. “That looks tasty.”
“I thought they could use the water.” Cheryl touched Josh’s forehead and then Issy’s.
He set the bags on the table and pulled out bottles, tubes and cotton balls. “I talked to the pharmacist, too. She confirmed everything I bought.”
“They’re both running low-grade temps.” Cheryl wrapped her arms around her stomach. “I don’t like this.”
“Are they over 102 degrees?” The doc had said to call if that happened.
“No.”
Josh held out his stick. “Mom.”
“Yes?”
“I’m done.”
Cheryl brushed Issy’s hair back. “Hey, short stuff. I wish you would tell us how you feel.”
Issy rubbed her eyes.
“Don’t rub, sweetie.” Nathan pulled her hands away. “I know it itches, but you can’t rub.”
Issy whimpered. He picked her up and she tucked her head under his chin. “I wish I could take away the itches.”
Josh scratched under his T-shirt.
“Let’s get the antihistamines in them.” Nathan grabbed the paper with the doses.
He handed the note and box to Cheryl. “You’d better check that I wrote down the right amounts.”
She checked the back of the box and the amounts he’d written down. “These are right.”
“I bought two boxes. Can we mark each dropper with the right dose and keep them separate?” Then he wouldn’t worry about screwing up and hurting the kids.
“Good idea.” She touched his back before getting a marker to indicate the right dose. “We’ll keep Josh’s in the bathroom and Issy’s in the kitchen.”
They dosed the kids and covered the spots with aloe vera.
“I bought a...” He couldn’t find the damn word. Instead he handed Cheryl the box.
“An infuser?”
He shrugged. “A website said we could use lavender oil to keep them calmer.”
“You’re a good man.” She started to fold the bag, then shook it. “What else did you get?”
“A few things to keep them occupied.” A couple of movies and coloring books. Chutes and Ladders. Matchbox cars. He’d loved those as a kid.
“Do you want to watch a movie?” Cheryl asked the kids.
“Sure.” Josh pointed at the action movie. Issy pointed at the princess movie.
Cheryl held up the princess movie. “Issy first then Josh’s pick.”
Josh’s face looked like a thundercloud had rolled in. “Mom.”
“Josh.”
It would be a long day.
* * *
“I GAVE JOSH his antihistamine.” Cheryl stretched her arms over her head. Everything ached. She hadn’t carried Josh this much in years. “He’s asleep.”
“Issy went out like a light. I hope they don’t scratch all night.” Nathan sat on the sofa, his head bouncing a little on the back cushion. “Thanks for letting her sleep here tonight.”
“They comfort each other.” She chewed on her lip. She should make a bed for Nathan on the sofa.
“Come here.” He patted the spot next to him.
Sitting next to him, she heaved a sigh. “I’m glad we’re...together in this.”
“Me, too.” He kissed her forehead. “I’d be fumbling without you.”
He shifted so they sat sideways on the sofa, her back to him. Then he kneaded her neck.
Her head dropped forward. The warmth of his touch released the tension in her shoulders. “Don’t stop.”
Chuckling, he worked his hands as if kneading dough.
“Lie down.” His warm breath caressed her ear.
She sank into the cushions.
Nathan worked his amazing hands down her back. His weight shifted and he massaged her thighs and feet. The fridge hummed. The fan oscillated, blowing against her skin. None of that mattered. There were only his hands on her body and the incredible intimacy of his touch.
His movements slowed. Instead of massaging, he stroked. His hand slipped under her shirt and wrapped around to caress her breasts.
Her breath stuttered, awareness shooting through her body. Everything yearned inside her. For Nathan. She wanted this. Wanted him.
He pressed his lips against her neck and lingered. Each stroke of his tongue sent energy coursing to her core.
“I do better work in bed.” His words were warm pulses in her ear.
“Massage?”
Flipping her over, he hauled her into his arms. “That, too.”
She laughed, but his lips stopped the sound. His kiss swept away her stress. She clutched at his soft hair. No more chicken pox, rashes or cranky kids. She tucked away the worry that Josh despised Nathan.
Their tongues stroked and played. His hands cupped her butt and tugged her up, swinging her so she straddled his lap.
She tightened her legs around him and their bodies aligned. The seam of her shorts rubbed in all the right places. His magical hands slid her tank top and bra straps down her shoulders. As he kissed his way to her breasts, she moaned.
They shouldn’t be out in the open like this. Josh or Issy might wake up.
Her hips rocked with his. “We should...”
He rolled a nipple between his fingers and took the other in his mouth. She forgot everything but the sensations ricocheting through her body and converging between her legs. Heat. Fire. Pulsing need.
The world jerked and shifted. Nathan carried her down the hall. “I need you. Now.”
She pressed the door closed as he carried her into the bedroom. Then it was a scramble to shed their clothes. Even the air-conditioning on her bare skin didn’t cool her fire.
His shorts jingled as he dug for his wallet and pulled out a condom. She should keep condoms in the nightstand.
“Let me.” She took the packet and rolled it on, staring into his eyes.
“Are you okay with this?” he whispered, pulling her on top of him.
She flung a leg over him, like a cowgirl. “Oh, yeah.”
Settling on top of his erection, she rolled her hips. Tingles ignited in every muscle.
“I plan to drive you crazy.” She ran her teeth along the shell of his ear. His groan rumbled under her lips.
“Just looking at you makes me crazy.” His breath feathered her hair. “I want to be inside you.”
“Not yet.” She undulated her hips.
His fingers tightened on her butt. It would be her fault if there was bruising, but she didn’t care. She wanted him mad with desire.
“Cheryl.” He lunged and took her nipple in his mouth. His small bite took her to new thresholds of pleasure. Then he did the same to her other breast.
She jerked up and slid him home.
“Oh, oh, oh, my.” Her words tumbled out.
He held her in place. “Hang on.”
“Nathan.” She wanted to ride him into oblivion.
“Wait,” he groaned through gritted teeth. “Please.”
She tightened around him.
His fingers clenched around her hips. “You’re pushing me over the edge.”
She grinned.
“Kiss me,” he demanded.
Her hair fell around their faces. Just leaning forward changed the pressure into something...more. Her breath quickened.
His kiss was rough, carnal and everything she wanted. She tried to move, but he kept one hand on the small of her back and one locked in her hair.
When the kiss ended, she gasped for air. “I need to move.”
She should be in control. But she wasn’t. He manipulated every slide, keeping them slow and steady. She wanted speed. She set her hands beside his head. “Please.”
“I don’t want this to end.”
She would die from sexual frustration before she came.
Finally they moved. Their bodies slid apart then joined together. Each stroke took her higher. Her breath caught in her chest and stars glittered at the edge of her vision.
“Breathe,” Nathan whispered.
She gave in, gave Nathan control.
He reached between them and she combusted at his touch. Nathan gripped her hips, thrusting higher, and followed her into orbit.
Her muscles melted like ice cream in July. She collapsed onto his chest.
“I’ve got you.” Nathan stroked her back, pressing her close. “I’ve got you.”
What energy she had evaporated. It was all she could do to roll with him to her side. Her breaths came in deep gasps.
They lay together on the same pillow, face to face. He brushed a kiss on her lips. “That was... You are...”
“Unbelievable.” She found enough energy to touch his cheek. “Thank you.”
“Thank you.” He grinned. She could see the carefree boy he must have been once.
Nathan kissed her slowly and tenderly. When he pulled away, her breath stuttered out and her heart pounded.
He sighed. “I’ll be right back.”
She burrowed deeper under the sheet. In a few minutes she would get up and find Nathan the extra blanket and pillow she’d bought. Get him set up on the sofa.
A few minutes to enjoy the aftershocks of her orgasm. Who would have guessed Nathan was so wonderfully thorough?
And she drifted to sleep.