As soon as the movie ended, I jumped up and stretched. “I’m headed to bed.”
Garrett’s brow wrinkled. “It’s eight-thirty.”
“Yeah, and by the time I change into my jammies, wash my face, and brush my teeth, it’ll be a quarter to nine. Then I’ll read for fifteen minutes before turning out the light.” I walked into the kitchen and filled a glass with water before getting one of his pills out of the bottle. “Here’s your pain pill. I’m guessing these make it easier to sleep.”
He shrugged and held out his hand. “It helps.” After swallowing his medicine, he stood. “What are you reading?”
“A romance novel.”
His low chuckle was as satisfying as a warm doughnut. “That’s kind of like you not eating doughnuts. You read about what you won’t do, and you make what you won’t eat.”
That one sentence summed up my entire adult life. But how could he know that?
“What? I never said . . .” Had I talked in my sleep? At no point during our time together had I mentioned my issues with relationships, other than the slip about Skeeter.
“Let’s call it an educated guess on my part. You seriously go lights out at nine? Every night?” He winced as he stretched.
“Okay, Mr. Spy, I get that you live the night life and chase people around in the shadows long after I’m asleep, but the doughnuts don’t make themselves. The shop opens at six. And people show up, expecting to get doughnuts, which means I have to make them before six.” I picked up my phone. “We lead opposite lives.”
That was another good reminder of why I shouldn’t risk my heart on Garrett.
After getting ready for bed, I pulled back the covers and slid between the sheets. I wanted to know the thread count because these sheets were the most luxurious fabric I’d ever had against my skin.
I opened the book and tried reading where I’d left off. Normally, I’d be excited about the hero finally kissing the heroine, but tonight, my heart was torn. Reading about what I wouldn’t do wasn’t entertaining right now, so I closed the book and flopped back on the goose-down pillows.
My brain replayed the day like a movie reel, and when it reached the end, I sat up. It’d been hours since we’d eaten. I probably should’ve given Garrett a snack with his pill. Taking meds on an empty stomach was a bad idea. He was probably still awake.
Two steps out of my room, I could tell the living room was dark, but his bedroom door was still open.
“Garrett?” I rapped on the open door before walking in. “You awake?”
The bed was still made, and the light in the bathroom wasn’t on. He clearly wasn’t in here.
Now I had to find him before I’d be able to sleep. “Garrett?” Grateful for my fuzzy socks, I padded through the first floor. When I didn’t find him, I stepped out onto the porch.
We hadn’t gotten any more snow after the flurries this morning, but we still had a chance. Stadtburg had gotten considerably more, and I probably would’ve closed the shop before noon because when it snowed, people stayed home.
I walked from one end of the long patio to the other. It was still too early to panic. He wouldn’t have left the house without saying anything.
That man better not be driving after taking that pill. I ran out to the garage. My car was right where I’d left it.
The second floor had five bedrooms, and Garret wasn’t in any of them. I pushed open the double doors in the game room and checked the second-floor porch. He wasn’t here either.
There was only one place left to check, then I’d panic. The door at the end of the hall stood open. Why hadn’t I noticed that? I climbed the circular staircase, then stepped out onto the rooftop patio.
Garrett sat on the sofa with a blanket wrapped around him.
“There you are.” I crossed my arms, wishing I’d grabbed a jacket.
“Oh, hey. I thought you’d be asleep by now.” He glanced back and smiled. “What do you need?”
“I remembered that you hadn’t eaten in hours, and it’s better to take your meds with food.” I shivered and rubbed my arms.
“I grabbed a doughnut, but thanks for looking out for me.”
Lingering near the door, I stared at the back of his head. “What are you doing up here?”
“Thinking.”
Answers like that only made me more curious. I sat down beside him. “About?”
He turned to face me. “You.”
In the moonlight, I could just make out his smile. Silence surrounded us while I waited for him to elaborate, but he didn’t.
Holding out his arm, he motioned me closer. “This blanket is big enough for both of us. Look out that direction.”
I stared at the twinkling stars. “The clouds went away.”
He wrapped the blanket around my shoulders. “They did.”
Fireworks lit up the sky.
I tilted my head to look up at him. “Wow! How did you know?”
“The amusement park does displays sometimes on the weekends. During the summer, I think they do one every night.”
I tucked my feet up beside me and leaned against Garret. “I can’t remember the last time I watched a fireworks display.”
“That’s because you go to bed before the sun goes down most nights.” He nudged me and grinned. “This house is nice, but this is the one part I wish I could take home with me. It’s almost magical sitting up here and looking out at this view.”
“For me, it would be the hot tub.” I kept my eyes focused on the sky, enjoying the splashes of color exploding against the darkness.
“You never told me about your family.” He shifted and draped his arm around my shoulders.
Right now, I didn’t care about the friend zone. I could tell myself I was only snuggled here because the air was frigid, but that would be lying. And I was horrible at making a lie believable. Being alone with Garrett like this felt comfortable. And this week, I was going to let myself enjoy it. I didn’t care about any zone.
Life would settle back into normal once he returned home to the ranch and I went back to making doughnuts every morning.
“My parents married really young. Mom was seventeen. Dad was nineteen. They’d dated all through high school and then married a week after her graduation. My earliest memory is of my mom screaming at my dad. Standing toe to toe with him and yelling right in his face. And they’ve continued that way ever since. Sometimes it’s dad who does the yelling. They never hit each other, so that’s good, I guess.”
“I’m sorry you had to grow up with that.”
When the fireworks ended, I rested my head on his shoulder. “They both worked, so I stayed with my aunt during the day, Eli’s mom. Aunt Patsy always wore a smile, and she had the best laugh. She was a cookies-after-school kind of mom. I love my parents, but being around them isn’t enjoyable. Oh, I also forgot to mention the houseful of pets. My parents have seven cats—named after the dwarves—a chihuahua named Diablo, and the dumbest chocolate lab on the planet. Her name is Coco.”
He rubbed my shoulder. “Are you a cat or a dog person?”
“I’m a neither. I don’t hate them. I just have no desire to have a pet. That probably makes me sound like a horrible person.”
“Not at all. Do you get home often?”
“Often enough. I was on my way home from their house when I found you. They moved out near Johnson City several years ago, so I see them a few times a year. They work; I work. But I drove out to have Thanksgiving dinner with them. It was more of a lunch.”
“You closed the shop?” There was a hint of tease in his question.
“I closed early. I only stay open until eleven on holidays.”
He blinked before looking down at me. “You’re open every single day?”
“Yeah. That’s too much, isn’t it?”
“Yes, Tessa, it’s too much.”
“Delaney told me the same thing.” I picked at a piece of lint on the blanket. “I should probably change that.”
He rested his head on mine.
“Why were you out on Thanksgiving? Didn’t Ava have a big dinner at the ranch?” I wanted to keep him talking because if he went to sleep up here, I’d be in trouble.
“We ate early. I didn’t miss it. But I left after we ate because my client had left me a message about her husband.” He quieted with his head still against mine.
The wind gusted, and I snuggled closer to him. It would be too easy to fall asleep beside him.
Wriggling my hand out of the blanket, I reached up and touched his face. “Please don’t go to sleep. I can’t carry you down the stairs. And if we sleep out here, we’ll freeze.”
His cheek moved against my hand as he smiled. “I’m not falling asleep. I was contemplating an idea.”
“What idea?”
“I’m not trying to pull you away from your family, but what if you took a few days off at Christmas and stayed out at the ranch? The cabin by mine is empty. It could be like a mini vacation.”
Was it cold enough to freeze tears? I was about to find out. Worrying my bottom lip, I imagined spending Christmas with people who laughed. Then I imagined spending it with Garrett. “I don’t know.”
“You don’t have to decide right now. The offer stands.”
“If you feel like retracting it by the end of the week, I’ll understand.” I managed to get the words out without a waver in my voice, but my favorite spy could probably tell I was about to cry.
Warmth tickled my ear as he leaned in close. “We’re friends. Nothing will change that.”
How did he know the right words to say? “Thank you.”
“Let’s get back inside before we turn into icicles.” He slipped out from under the blanket and held out his hand. “I’ve kept you up past your bedtime.”
Going into my own room spawned a sense of loneliness, but sleeping snuggled against Garrett simply because I liked how it felt was not allowed in the friend zone even with the most generous of definitions. With my bedroom door open, I slipped under the covers and closed my eyes.
I opened my eyes, expecting daylight, but the house was still dark. After tapping my phone screen, I groaned. Why was I awake at one in the morning?
Shouts sounded across the hall. Garret yelled something unintelligible.
My bare feet slapped the cold tile as I raced to his bed.
Flailing and groaning, he fought an unseen assailant.
I scurried across the massive bed on my hands and knees and leaned over him. Was it bad to wake someone during a nightmare?
Instead of shaking him, I laid my head on his chest. “I’m here. You’re okay.”
He dropped his arms and sighed. “Please don’t shoot.”
“It’s just me, Garrett.” Tears stung my eyes, and I wiped them away when they slid down my cheeks. Without lifting my head, I shifted under the covers.
He rested his brace on my back. “Tessa.”
“That’s right. It’s me. I’m just going to stay here to fight off your bad dreams, okay?”
His soft snore sounded a lot like a yes.
Listening to the steady rhythm of his heartbeat, I scolded myself. Less than thirty-six hours into our little getaway, and I’d tossed my heart onto the butchering slab. I needed to return it to the freezer and tell Garrett that he was right about what I wouldn’t do or more accurately, what I couldn’t do. I’d never told anyone before, but he deserved to know why.