The week after Christmas was a blur of activity. Between running the shop and helping Delaney with last-minute details for the wedding, I barely had time to sleep, which meant I didn’t have time for friendly soaks in the hot tub or horseback riding.
It was New Year’s Eve, and I made sure everything was in place before unlocking the door. Today would likely be busy, and I’d made extra doughnuts in preparation. All that was left to do was taping up the signs that let people know I’d be closed tomorrow and all of next weekend. If I continued closing this often, I’d need to move into the cabin just to make ends meet.
After taping up a sign on the door and another near the register, I flipped the bolt on the door.
A steady stream of customers, who were getting their sugar fix for today and buying for tomorrow, had my doughnuts completely gone by noon. I taped up another sign, letting people know I’d sold out, then drove to my apartment.
Since my breakup with Skeeter, I hadn’t attended a New Year’s Eve party. I’d rung in every new year sound asleep. But tonight, there was a party at the venue, and I’d promised Delaney and Eli that I’d be there.
Garrett hadn’t mentioned it, but I knew he’d be there too.
I flipped through my outfits, trying to decide what to wear. Cami had mentioned that there would be a live band, so jeans and boots were probably the best option. After laying out what I planned to wear, I crawled in bed for a nap. If there was any hope of my staying up until midnight, I needed sleep.
“You didn’t have to give me a ride. I could’ve driven myself.” I walked with Delaney and Eli toward the big gathering room at the venue.
“Now you can toast in the new year.” Eli tucked an arm around Delaney’s waist.
“You were afraid I wouldn’t show up.” I did appreciate that they’d gone to the effort of making sure I made it.
Delaney bounced her head up and down. “Yes. We wanted you to be here.”
“And now I’m stuck.” I was more nervous about tonight than I had any reason to be.
Eli stopped and faced me. “Whenever you want to leave, tell me. I’ll drive you home. Even if it means leaving my fiancée just as the countdown nears zero. I will leave and take you wherever you want to go.”
“I’m not going to interrupt your big moment of the night.”
He shifted so that he stood between me and Delaney. “We don’t want you to feel trapped. We want you to have fun.”
Delaney kissed his cheek. “What he said.”
“Thanks. Y’all go in. I’m going to ease into the room.” I wanted to get my bearings before feeling bombarded.
The doughnut shop was often crowded, but that was my space, and it didn’t feel the same as being here even if the room was filled with faces I recognized, people who came into the shop regularly.
Then I spotted Garrett.
The sound I made was either me gasping or my heart screeching to a stop.
Wearing jeans that fit him just right, black boots, a long-sleeved paisley shirt, and the hat I’d given him, he looked like reason enough to stay. Meeting my gaze across the room, he tipped his hat.
I wove my way through the crowd, and we met in the middle of the dance floor. A new song started as I walked up, and Garrett lifted his eyebrows.
In answer to his silent question, I rested my hand on his shoulder. He touched a hand to my waist, and warmth danced through me even before our boots started moving.
“I’m happy you came. I wasn’t sure if you’d be awake.” He moved us around the dance floor, maintaining a polite distance between us.
“Delaney made me promise, so I took a nap today. It helped that I sold out early.” I questioned my sanity for not ignoring my fear. Dating Garrett could be amazing. But it could also leave me staring disappointment in the face.
The image of a younger me stuffing her face with doughnuts flashed in my head, and I remembered why Garrett and I were only friends.
We danced through several songs. Then he led me off the dance floor to a table in the corner.
Cami waved as we approached. “I wondered where y’all were. Isn’t this great? I hope Lilith has a New Year’s party every year.”
Haley rubbed her belly. “I’m pretty sure we won’t make it next year.”
Zach nodded. “We may not even make it until midnight this year.” He draped an arm over the back of Haley’s chair and kissed the side of her head.
Harper laughed. “Hank and Nacha are here. Kids are no excuse.”
“And I’ve thanked Clint and Aunt Joji a hundred times for babysitting. We won’t stay too late, but it is nice to have a date night.” Hank dipped Nacha and kissed her.
Grinning, she slid her hands around his neck. “They did offer to babysit all night.”
Hank turned and tugged on her hand. “See y’all later.”
The table erupted in laughter. Then Hank and Nacha dropped into seats on the other side of the table.
“We’ll visit for a bit.” He draped an arm around her.
My friends made being in love look easy and painless. And there was no question by the way their husbands looked at them that they were good at making them happy.
Garrett nodded toward the bar. “Can I get you anything?”
I wanted a drink, but I needed food. “Yes. A margarita would be wonderful. I’m going to run to the buffet. Want anything?”
“Food.” He winked. “I’ll meet you back here.”
Weaving my way to the food, I took the long way to avoid the women who’d been in the shop the day Garrett had asked me out the very first time. I could never remember their names because in my head, I thought of them as the hens, or if they weren’t together—hen one, hen two. But they were always in the middle of gossip, and I preferred to avoid being gossiped about. The less contact I had with them the better.
With two plates in hand, I made my way down the line, loading up on what I wanted and on what I knew Garrett would like. I carried the plates back to the table, smiling as Garrett set our drinks down.
He reached out to take the plates. “Good timing.” His gaze jumped to something near my shoulder.
Then I felt the tap. “Tessa, hi. It’s great to see you here. I haven’t seen you at a New Year’s Eve party since . . . well, you know.” She cupped her hand near her mouth and pretended to whisper. “Since you were dumped.”
Hen one had been drinking.
“This party sounded fun.”
She chewed her bottom lip. “Ashley said the two of you were just friends.”
Instead of pretending I didn’t know who she was talking about—which I was tempted to do—I swallowed and gave a tiny nod.
A wide smile spread across her face as her gaze shifted. Garrett was behind me. I could feel him, and if I’d had any doubt, her look confirmed it.
“Will you introduce me?” She licked her lips.
A Tolkien-style epic battle raged inside me. I did not want to introduce her, but what right did I have to make that choice? But even a good friend wouldn’t introduce her. She’d had no interest in Garrett when she sat near him in the doughnut shop, but now that she knew who he was, she wanted to be introduced to Beau Henry’s son. I just had to figure out how to say no without making it sound like I wanted Garrett for myself.
I wasn’t sure how to do that.
Strong arms wrapped around me. “Hey. Our food is getting cold.”
Maybe I did love Garrett.
“Hey, hen.” Eli stuck his hand out as he walked up. “Have you met my fiancée?”
While Eli introduced Delaney, I spun around and dropped into my seat.
Garrett squeezed my hand. “If she asks again, the answer is no. I remember her from the shop. I need someone nice.”
At the moment I didn’t feel very nice.
Eli dropped into the chair next to me. “You’re welcome.”
“Why did you call her hen? That’s rude.” I appreciated the escape, but still.
He scrunched up his face. “Hen? I called her Jen. Her name is Jen.”
Oh. I hadn’t heard him correctly.
Maybe now I’d remember her name.
Flutes of champagne and cups of sparkling cider were being passed around as the year inched toward its final minutes. Couples moved to the dance floor or wandered off alone. At five minutes before midnight, Garrett and I were the only two at the table.
The temptation to do something I might regret—kissing him when the clock struck midnight—pounded in my chest. My fear wasn’t gone. But my attraction—was it even just attraction now? My attraction was growing.
Acting more on panic, I hugged him. “I had fun tonight.”
I tried not to notice the expectant look in his eyes.
“I did too. I’m glad you came.”
Without another word, I jumped up and rushed out the side door. I didn’t look back to see Garrett’s reaction, but shock and disappointment were probably etched on his handsome face.
He deserved someone who could love him. Someone nice. Someone who could satisfy him.
Wiping tears, I dropped the tailgate on Eli’s truck and sat down. They could have their celebration, and I’d find him in a bit.
I’d promised myself I wouldn’t think about my relationship with Garrett before the wedding, but everything made me think of Garrett. Why did I have to go and make things complicated?
As cheers erupted inside the building and a few fireworks exploded in the sky, a tall, chiseled figure strode toward me.
Garrett hooked a thumb over his shoulder. “It got loud, and everyone started kissing. I figured I’d join you out here.” Instead of sitting down, he stopped in front of me. “If you want to talk, I’m willing to listen.”
I just needed to tell him that I was afraid to discuss it before the wedding. He’d understand.
“I’m afraid . . .” Words evaporated, leaving me grasping for coherency. “I mean . . .”
“I know you’re afraid.” He stepped in between my legs and rested his hands on my hips. “Is that why you left?”
I shook my head, then nodded. “I’m afraid of what I want.”
“What do you want?”
Staring at the buttons on his shirt, I blurted out an honest answer. “I want you to kiss me, and I want—”
His lips met mine with hunger and passion. Frozen, I urged myself to relax. I wanted this. So much.
He moaned, and that rumbly sound fueled me with a courage I didn’t think possible. I felt desired. As I grasped his shirt, one of his hands found its way into my hair, and he tilted my head, giving him a better angle. I melted. My body reacted to his touch, to his kiss.
When he broke away, I leaned my head on his chest. His rapid heartbeat mimicked mine.
Close to my ear, he whispered, sending warmth dancing down my neck. “I know why you’re afraid. You can feel my heartbeat, can’t you?”
“Yes.” My answer escaped as a whisper.
“Does it feel disappointed?”
Still clutching his shirt, I held back sobs.
“Tessa, Skeeter was wrong. Or maybe he and I just want different things. Some men want notches on the bed post and a string of conquests. Want to know what I want?”
I nodded against his chest.
“You.” That one word was laced with more desire than I’d ever had directed at me.
“What if he was right?” Believing something for so long made it feel very true.
Garrett leaned back and cupped my chin. “He proved that he’s not trustworthy.” Before I could figure out what to say in response, he kissed my forehead, then pulled me to his chest. “This will be a busy week for you, and my timing probably wasn’t great.”
“Can we have the rest of this conversation after the wedding?”
“Just say when.” He brushed a tear off my cheek. “Let me drive you home.”
“Thanks.” I slid off the tailgate and clasped Garrett’s hand.
“You were about to say something else you wanted, but I sort of interrupted.” He squeezed my hand.
“We’ll talk in a week. If I start now, I’ll be a blubbering mess, and I can’t fall apart this week.”
“That’s fine. I can wait a week. And the image of you as a blubbering mess makes my chest ache, so don’t do that.” He opened the passenger door.
I hugged him. “Thank you for making this the best New Year’s party ever. Sorry I ran out before the big toast.”
His thumb brushed my cheek. “Happy New Year, Tessa. I hope this is the best one yet.”
As Garrett pulled out of the venue, I texted Eli to let him know I had a ride home.
That was probably the plan all along.
The memory of Garrett’s lips on mine would be a constant companion this week, and I wanted to believe him. Garrett was far more trustworthy than Skeeter. But what would it take for me to change my view of myself?
As we drove, he clasped my hand. With all the expected bustle and chaos, I needed his steadiness. And maybe a friendly soak in the hot tub.