91

‘What are you doing?’

‘What does it look like I’m doing?’ Abi could feel the anger simmering away inside him. He wrapped the assault rifle in a blanket and stowed it underneath the bunk bed at the rear of the Mercedes motorhome. He felt like a Viking berserker readying himself to rush at the enemy.

‘And what is that?’

‘It’s a Kevlar KM2 interceptor vest. The sort the US military use.’

‘A vest?’

‘I call it my Wolf Pelt. It’s to protect me from bullets. You wear it underneath your normal clothes. It will stop anything short of a rifle round.’

‘And you keep such things at your house as a matter of course?’

‘It’s how I live my life. I love weapons. I love the smell of them. The weight of them. What they can do.’

‘You’re serious about this, then? You’re going to carry these weapons through four border crossings?’

‘Did you ever think I wasn’t? Three of the men I am going up against have pistols. I know this for a fact. Do you want me to get killed?’

Antanasia hugged her arms around her body. ‘Abiger, why are you doing this? You have everything you want in this world. You are a good man.’

‘I am not a good man. You say I have everything I want in this world. You’re wrong. When I said I love you, I meant it. But I know I can’t have you. I’m not a fool. You don’t know the half of what I’ve done. If you did, you’d run down that track screaming. So if I can’t have you, I’ll have the next best thing. I’ll have my revenge. Apart from you, my twin brother is the only person I have ever loved in this world – the only person who never betrayed me. Some people would call him stupid. Backward even. But he was a part of me.’ Abi tore open his shirt. ‘You see this scar? That’s where we were fused together at birth. Him and me. We shared a kidney. The doctors threw it out. One kidney is enough for anybody, they told the Carmelite nuns, as they accepted the sacrificial offering of Vau and me from our mother. Whoever the bitch was.’

Antanasia took a step towards him.

‘Stay away from me.’

‘Why?’

‘Because I can’t allow myself to touch you anymore. Because any normal woman would have stepped away from me, and not towards me, when I told them that. You get under my skin, Antanasia. I can’t handle it.’

Antanasia nodded.

Abi raised his head in surprise. ‘You know, don’t you? You understand?’

She nodded again.

‘I’ve spent my entire life taking what I want, whenever I want it. I’ve decided that you’re going to be the exception that proves my rule.’

Antanasia lowered her head. ‘Every man I’ve ever known has taken what he wanted from me without my permission. Why should you be any different?’

‘That’s the reason I can’t touch you anymore.’ The words caught in Abi’s throat. ‘It’s the only thing I can offer you that’s of any value. Call it my love gift to you.’ Abi gave a snort – it came out as a half-choke, half-laugh. It was the sort of sound a man might make who was fighting unexpected tears. He rammed the bunk bed onto its housing and attached the locks with an unnecessary show of force. ‘Do you still want to accompany me to Romania? Think before you speak.’

‘Yes.’

‘On your own head be it, then.’