EXCEEDINGLY content, elated, and vainglorious was Don Quixote, at having gained the victory over so valiant a knight, as he imagined him of the Looking-glasses to be; from whose knightly word he hoped to learn, whether the enchantment of his mistress continued, the said knight being under a necessity of returning, upon pain of not being one, to give him an account of what should pass between her and him. But Don Quixote thought one thing, and he of the Looking-glasses another; who, for the present thought no further than of finding a place where he might plaster himself, as has been already said.
The history then tells us, that, when the bachelor Sampson Carrasco advised Don Quixote to resume his intermitted exploits of chivalry, he, the priest and the barber, had first consulted together about the means of persuading Don Quixote to stay peaceably and quietly at home, without distracting himself any more about his unlucky adventures; and it was concluded by general vote, and particular opinion of Carrasco, that they should let Don Quixote make another sally, since it seemed impossible to detain him, and that Sampson should also sally forth like a knight-errant, and encounter him in fight (for an opportunity could not be long wanting), and so vanquish him, which would be an easy matter to do; and that it should be covenanted and agreed, that the conquered should lie at the mercy of the conqueror; and so, Don Quixote being conquered, the bachelor knight should command him to return home to his village and house, and not stir out of it in two years, or till he had received further orders from him: all which, it was plain, Don Quixote, when once overcome, would readily comply with, not to contravene or infringe the laws of chivalry: and it might so fall out, that, during his confinement, he might forget his follies, or an opportunity might offer of finding out some cure for his malady.
Carrasco accepted of the employment, and Tom Cecial, Sancho Panza’s gossip and neighbour, a pleasant-humoured, shallow-brained fellow, offered his service to be the squire. Sampson armed himself, as you have heard, and Tom Cecial fitted the counterfeit pasteboard nose to his face, that he might not be known by his gossip when they met; and so they took the same road that Don Quixote had taken, and arrived almost in time enough to have been present at the adventure of Death’s car. But, in short, they lighted on them in the wood, where befell them all that the prudent [reader] has been reading. And had it not been for Don Quixote’s extraordinary opinion, that the bachelor was not the bachelor, Señor Bachelor had been incapacitated for ever from taking the degree of licentiate, not finding so much as nests, where he thought to find birds.
Tom Cecial, seeing how ill they had sped, and the unlucky issue of their expedition, said to the bachelor:
‘For certain, Señor Sampson Carrasco, we have been very rightly served. It is easy to design and begin an enterprise, but very often difficult to get through with it. Don Quixote is mad, and we think ourselves wise: he gets off sound and laughing, and your worship remains sore and sorrowful. Now, pray, which is the greater madman, he who is so because he cannot help it, or he who is so on purpose?’
To which Sampson answered:
‘The difference between these two sorts of madmen, is, that he, who cannot help being mad, will always be so; and he, who plays the fool on purpose, may give over when he thinks fit.’
‘If it be so,’ quoth Tom Cecial, ‘I was mad when I had a mind to be your worship’s squire, and now I have a mind to be so no longer, and to get me home to my house.’
‘It is fit you should,’ answered Sampson; ‘but to think that I will return to mine, till I have soundly banged this same Don Quixote, is to be greatly mistaken; and it is not now the desire of curing him of his madness that prompts me to seek him, but a desire of being revenged on him; for the pain of my ribs will not let me entertain more charitable considerations.’
Thus they two went on discoursing, till they came to a village, when they luckily met with a bone-setter, who cured the unfortunate Sampson. Tom Cecial went back and left him, and he stayed behind meditating revenge; and the history speaks of him again in due time, not omitting to rejoice at present with Don Quixote.