I collapsed onto his chest and listened to his heart beat. I knew better than to think it meant something, but damn was that amazing. I needed to get laid more often if I was able to forget how much I enjoyed sex.
When I could finally breathe normally, I rolled off Noah. He tucked me against his side for a minute, then kissed my forehead and went to take care of the condom.
“Give me a few minutes and we’re gonna do that again,” he said when he crawled back onto the bed. He hovered above me, his knees next to my hip, and kissed me softly, sweetly. He kissed one side of my mouth. Then worked his way to the other side. Then kissed my jaw. And my neck. Then my collarbone.
And kept going.
When he kneeled on the floor between my thighs, I knew that scruff on his cheeks I’d been imagining earlier was not going to disappoint. The first swipe of his tongue had my hips rising off the bed. Then he added a finger or two. He took his time. The slow build had me nearly whimpering by the time he circled my clit with his tongue.
I came in an instant, my legs clenching around his neck as I tried to hold him in place. The scrape of his stubble on my inner thighs made my orgasm more powerful and I screamed his name while he pumped his thick fingers into me.
Once I released him, Noah kissed my thighs and slowly withdrew his fingers. He met my eyes over my belly as he slid them in his mouth and licked them clean.
“I knew after I kissed you that I wanted to do that. Thank you for letting me.”
“You’re giving me some pretty fabulous treatment here. If I’d known it would be like this I’d have let you have the stool.”
He cocked his head to the side. “So we wouldn’t have talked?”
I shook my head. “No, so you could have rested. You’ve still got work to do.”
He threw his head back and laughed. He got to his feet and crawled over me. He kissed me, letting me taste myself on his tongue. “I do have more work to do. I’ve got another condom to put to good use.”
I laughed long enough for him to lower his lips and kiss me again, then I moaned and screamed and panted as we went through the rest of his condoms.
I was still smiling the following Tuesday when I walked in Bite Me! for our weekly girls’ night. In California, girls’ night was a reason to get dressed up in your sexiest outfit and go to a club with your most famous acquaintances so you could be seen. In Winterville, New York, a small town outside Buffalo, girls’ night was a chance to hang out with friends and eat cupcakes, something never done in Hollywood, and talk about everything.
I liked the Winterville version a lot better.
I didn’t feel bad about myself with my friends. It didn’t matter that I was a size eighteen and not a size two. It didn’t matter if I ate two cupcakes or four. What did matter was that I had fun every single week.
Suburbia was sucking me back in.
I thanked Charlie Sullivan, owner of Bite Me! and Abby’s sister-in-law, when she handed over my blueberry-lemon cupcakes. Yes, two of them. They were my version of chips and I couldn’t eat just one.
As always, Olivia’s daughter, Becca, came running over and wrapped herself around my legs. I learned after the first week, when I dumped my coffee all over the poor little girl, to avoid carrying more than one thing to our table at a time.
“Hey Bex,” I said, making her giggle. Her long, blonde hair shook with her laughter.
“You’re funny, Tara. Wanna know what I did at school today?”
“Of course,” I said, squeezing her tight for a second. She let go of my legs and walked to the table with me. Well, I walked, she sort of bounced her way over.
When I sat down, Becca scrambled onto my lap. She dipped her finger in my icing and licked it. I gave her my best stern face, making her giggle again. “I was gonna eat that,” I said, like I did every week.
“You should. It’s really good.” She beckoned me closer and glanced at Olivia. “Mommy doesn’t want me to eat too many sweets so she won’t let me have one when we come here. Plus, I heard her telling Ms. Abby she doesn’t have much money and can’t afford a lot of extras.”
I forced myself not to look at Olivia. I knew if I did, she would see that I knew something she wouldn’t feel comfortable with me knowing. But damn, did it hit me right in the chest to know Olivia’s life wasn’t perfect. I’d convinced myself she had her shit all figured out and was doing great. She put on a great face for everyone, and I had no reason to believe she was lying. But if she was that worried about money, things were clearly not great.
“Why don’t you share mine with me? But only a little bit. You won’t go to sleep tonight if you eat all this sugar.”
Becca giggled. “Mommy says that, too. How do you eat all that sugar and go to bed?”
Smart kid. “Well, I’m a lot bigger than you are so I can handle more sugar and my body will be able to process it because there’s more of me. Me eating this big cupcake is sort of like you eating one finger full of frosting.”
She swiped her finger through the frosting and took nearly half of it off the cupcake. “Like this?” she asked, innocence shining in her bright blue eyes.
I stifled a laugh and nodded. “Exactly like that. Eat it quick before your mom sees.”
Becca ducked her face away so Olivia couldn’t see her sticking the huge glob of frosting in her mouth. I glanced at Olivia and saw her watching us with a small smile. I looked away before our eyes met. I wasn’t ready to talk to her yet. I knew it was petty, but pain like she caused didn’t go away easily.
Carrie flopped down in the seat next to me, the last vacant one at our table. “I’m so sick of being pregnant,” she groaned.
I laughed. “Yeah, well, you’re the one who wanted kids so badly, from what I heard.”
“I do want kids. Lots of them. But I’m ready to meet this little sweetheart.”
“How is the baby going to get out?” Becca asked, mouth and fingered covered in sticky frosting.
Carrie looked at me and I shrugged, eyes wide. “Um, well I have to go to the hospital and the doctors will help take the baby out.”
Becca considered that for a minute. “My mommy said babies grow in your belly and then come out where you pee. It doesn’t seem like enough room for a baby though.”
I pressed my lips together to squash the laughter trying to break free. Carrie choked on a laugh and said, “Well, um, your mommy is right, but when you actually have a baby your body gets bigger until the baby can fit out.”
Becca’s eyes got wide. “So when you get fat in your tummy your pee parts get fat, too?”
“Becca!” Olivia exclaimed from across the table. “What in the world are you talking about?”
The horrified look on her face was too much for me. Especially when I caught the innocent look on Becca’s. She had no idea she’d said anything wrong and I felt bad for the little girl and immediately jumped to her defense through my laughter. “She was asking Carrie how the baby was going to come out. We didn’t really know how to explain it.”
Olivia closed her eyes and pinched her lips together. They turned up at the corners telling me she was trying not to laugh.
“Hey, Becca!” Xander called from the other table. “Elise wants to see you!”
Olivia flashed Xander a look of appreciation as Becca scrambled off my lap to join them. When I started going to girls’ night with Abby, it was a very different event. In the months since, Olivia started going and bringing her kids, which led to the other women bringing their husbands again. Xander was only one of two dads, and he was always trying to distract Olivia’s kids by encouraging Becca to play with his daughter, Elise, who was eleven months old. Brady, the other dad in the group, had his three month old daughter, Madison, on his lap while he talked to Carrie’s husband, Drew.
We were a big group.
Thankfully, Charlie closed Bite Me! on Tuesday nights so we could spread out and not worry about disturbing others. She didn’t for a while, but our group grew so much that she felt it was necessary. Plus, it gave her a chance to sit and enjoy the time with us, too.
“How are you feeling?” Sam asked Carrie.
“Ready to meet him or her.”
“I still can’t believe you guys never found out,” Vicki Prescott said. When Carrie found out she was pregnant, she hired Vicki to take over her job as assistant to Drew and Xander at XD Home Restoration. Vicki fit right into our group and had become close to Carrie and Mandy.
Carrie shrugged. “We know we want more kids so it didn’t matter if it was a boy or girl. Plus, this way, all the gear and the nursery are neutral and we can use the same stuff instead of buying new if the next kid is a different gender.”
“It’s so logical,” Mandy, Xander’s wife, added. “I almost wish we’d done that. Everything we have is pink and when we have a second kid, if it’s a boy, we’ll be starting from scratch.”
“You’re not pregnant again, are you?” Claire, Mandy’s best friend, asked.
Mandy shook her head. “No. We want to wait until Elise is a little older. We’ll probably start trying in a few months.”
“These big life decisions are tough, aren’t they?” Claire asked. “I mean, I only quit my job and started a company. You guys are creating life.”
We all laughed.
“Yeah, but creating life is a lot of fun work. Starting a company is stressful,” Carrie said.
“Not as stressful as divorce,” Abby said. “I think that was the worst thing I’ve ever been through.”
“I’m with you,” Olivia added. “Especially with the kids. I mean, Bill left a long time ago, but going through everything and trying to explain to two little kids that their daddy isn’t coming back is not an easy thing to deal with.”
“There are a ton of books about divorce and helping kids understand it. I think I saw something recently about making sense of one parent leaving. I’ll set it aside for you to look through when you guys come in this weekend,” Riley, the resident bookworm and owner of local bookstore, READ, said.
“I didn’t know you guys went to READ on the weekends,” Abby said. “That sounds like fun.”
Olivia nodded. “Riley has a great section in the kids area for them to play. They get mad when I try to drag them out of there so we just stay. It gives me a chance to sit and read and not worry about what they’re getting into.”
“Elise is only a year old and I can confirm how tough it is to follow them around. That’s another reason I’m not ready for a second one yet.”
“It gets easier as they get older. Now I can tell my kids to go do something and for the most part it’s done. With the exception of Kevin keeping an eye on Becca when I need him to.”
Olivia shot me a glance, but I pretended not to notice. I was not going to bond with her over how we ran into each other after almost ten years.
“Who’s got some news?” Sam asked. “We’re so sleep deprived from nighttime feedings that we haven’t had sex in forever. I need someone to give me a good story so I’m in the mood when we get home. Brady said the only way he’d come was if he was going to get rewarded for it.”
Everyone laughed. Sam was always looking for inspiration for her sex life. She and Carrie had the dirtiest minds of the group, which was why they got the nicknames Sassy Sam and Crass Carrie when I first met them. They lived up to them every time I saw them.
When no one immediately jumped to share, I leaned forward. “I met a guy Friday night,” I said, looking at Sam.
“Tell me more.”
I shrugged and leaned back. “I went to Malley’s for a little fun and found a lot of fun. His name is Noah.”
“My sister set me up with a guy named Noah. He wanted me to give him a blowjob under the table on our first date,” Addi said with a shudder. “Needless to say, there was not a second date.
“I remember that,” Sam said on a laugh. She focused back on me. “Was this Noah like that?”
I shook my head. “No, he didn’t ask me for a blowjob. Just lots of sex,” I said casually.
Sam pumped her fists in the air. “That’s what I’m talkin’ about! What happened?”
I grinned and leaned in closer. “We talked at the bar for a while and then I kissed him. He said if a kiss could be that good, he had to know what we were like in bed.”
“That’s a good line,” Sam said, looking a little impressed.
“It was enough to get me to go home with him. Once I made sure he wasn’t a reporter.”
“Oh, shit! I forgot all about that. We’ll talk about that next. Was the sex as good as the kiss?”
I smirked and nodded. “Better. The man is a master with his hands. And his mouth. And his… other parts.”
“When are you going to see him again?” Carrie asked.
I shook my head. “I’m not.”
“What? Why not?”
I shrugged. “It was a hook-up. A great night in bed. Not a relationship. I don’t even know his last name.”
“I think you’re my new hero,” Sam said with a hint of awe in her voice.
I laughed. “Hardly. I’ve been telling you guys I’m not interested in a relationship. My dad is getting better so I’ll probably be leaving soon. Plus, my last relationship didn’t go so well. I’m not really interested in repeating those mistakes.”
“Okay, so let’s talk about it. What happened with Patrick? You told us he moved on to someone else and his career finally took off. That you were pissed. But what the hell is going on that he would release pictures of you. And where did he get them?” Sam asked for the group.
I could tell by the interested faces that they were all wondering the same things as Sam. It was still new to me to have one person care about how I was feeling and what was going on in my life, but to have eleven people watching me with curiosity and concern was almost overwhelming.
Well, ten. Olivia didn’t look as much concerned as she did curious. Probably trying to figure out how she could use it against me.
“Abby and I were trying to figure this all out the other day. The only thing we can think is that with the new movie being shot here that he thought it would bring some additional drama and draw extra attention to the movie and to him. Sort of a guilty by association type of thing. Like sharing my pictures would put my name back on the pages of magazines and then he could ride that wave into town.”
“Have you talked with any of the press?” Lexi asked.
I shook my head. “I found out about it from one guy who didn’t identify himself as press until we’d been talking for a while. He was in Coming Up Daisies and seemed like a friendly customer. They’ve been to my parents’ house. My mom won’t let me be at work alone, which is stupid because that’s the whole reason I came back. To help her out so she could be there for my dad.”
“Yeah, but you said your dad is doing better. Your mom probably doesn’t need you as much,” Lexi said.
I nodded. “True. I still feel bad that I can’t even go into work though. I was never harassed like this in California. I’m the only news around here.”
“What are you going to do about all this? Are you going to issue some kind of statement?” Riley asked.
“No. I don’t have an agent or any way to get in touch with the press. It’s not really worth it to talk to the press. They want to print stuff that sells, not a former actress’s rant about why her ex is an asshole. I’m going to get even with him.”
“How are you going to do that?”
“Are you sure that’s a good idea?”
“You should let it go.”
“Good for you.”
They all spoke at once. I knew my plan wasn’t going to have full support of everyone, but I knew I couldn’t sit back and let him get away with what he did. An eye for an eye and all that. Patrick was going down.
“I know you guys are worried, but I have to do something. He’ll be here in a month. I have until then to come up with something that will embarrass him like he embarrassed me.”
“Just be careful,” Addi warned. “Things like revenge don’t always end well.”
“This isn’t high school, Addi.” I spared a glance at Olivia. “If it was, it would already be over.”
Olivia gasped, but no one else noticed. Olivia knew exactly what I was talking about. And that I was right.